Hi Dale!!!! How are you? Long time no see. I hope the business is doing great. I always was a horrible typist, but I did start out as a 'stenographer' at General Dynamics in the earliest 1980s. Even though they hired me for my shorthand (140 words per minute, I'm proud to say), I mostly typed and this was back when we had to type on IBM Selectric typewriters and and then had to learn to type on computers (called word processors at the time) and I hated them. LOL In the mid-1980s we had to start using a brand new (in the business world) process called 'Electronic Mail' on our brand new computerized word processors and I didn't like it either and could not see its' worth, which just goes to show that I am not good at spotting trends! So, I guess I've been typing a long time but never especially liked it...and didn't stay a stenographer long either, promoting out of secretarial work and into first a personnel administrative job and then later an accounting job before I quit my job in the early 1990s to do the whole stay-at-home-mom thing. I then spent the rest of the 1990s and even the earliest 2000s avoiding computers because I had my fill of them at work all those years. After we moved to a fairly remote, rural area ihere in Oklahoma in the late 1990s, I eventually had to learn to like my computer and communicate on it in order to stay in touch with what was going on in the real world. Now, of course, I cannot imagine my life without electronic communication. I do always write long threads, though, and that's just me trying to be thorough and complete and cover all the bases. Hope you're well and looking forward to another great garden year. Dawn

"Simply the fact is hybrids do not come true from seed!!" The simple fact is you have refused, so far, to consider the ample proof. _______________________________ "A plant genus does not come from a hybrid but it is the exact opposite!!" This one is well documented in any college freshman level biology book. But here's one random example (there are also many many more with known parentage in the Quercus genus), but, as I stated earlier, the phenomenon can also be seen throughout higher-level species of plants and animals. Quercus alba x Quercus bicolor = Quercus jackiana _______________________________ "If you actually could provide 1 thing to back you up..." More general evidence can be found in any college freshman level biology book, but here's one from Wikipedia's article on oaks (and before you start on it, evolution in this context has nothing to do with humans, so no need to even go there). This same thing occurs throughout higher life forms, but is more easily seen in oaks than in some other life forms because of the speed and frequency with which it occurs. "Frequent hybridisation among oaks has consequences for oak populations around the world; most notably, hybridization has produced large populations of hybrids with copious amounts of introgression, and the evolution of new species." Most modern day species have not been around for very long. They came from somewhere and that somewhere was through processes like mutation and hybridization of extinct and older extant species.

Oh pseudo -- wowzers -- I have no advice -- I can only offer a shoulder here. As a kid who grew up loving unconditionally the man who I thought hung the moon but who never really cared enough to be a dad or even want me around, I feel for your sd but as an adult and a parent, I feel for what you deal with. You are so strong, I don't know how you do it AND still love your husband. I tend to run from my problems so I don't know if I could ever say that I would be able to seperate the sd issues from loving my husband-- I think I wouldn't be able to stay if I were you. Big hugs!! I can't remember what age I was but I know the defiance started in 6th grade and I was 11 and I wanted to live with my dad more than anything in the world. I also hated my mom and stepdad's very strict rules. My God I wasn't even allowed to talk on the phone past 8pm!! The rudeness of those people!! So mom let me go live with my dad and within a week, I was begging to go home. Mom made me stay for two years. She was there for me though. She got me every weekend. She was at every cheer event, every fundraiser, every volleyball game and paid for it all. My dad (who I lived with) never once attended a sporting event nor did he pay for one. I still thought he hung the moon. When I finally went back to my mom's and it basically took me manipulating them in to letting me go back -- i never went back to my dad's. I can blame his absence on the mistakes I've made in my life, especially with men. I've had three therapists tell me it was his fault but I know in order to move on and learn from those mistakes I have to take responsibility for my own actions and not blame my crappy childhood on my adult life. Anyway -- my point is: even as a kid who thought the crappy parent hung the moon, I still can't understand why I did or why any kid does it but for some reason, the absent/non caring parent is always gold in the child's eyes. To put the blame on the parent that deserves it is like admitting that parent is the failure. Like you said, she treats the ones like crap that have to love her. I can't understand why I treated my mom so bad but I would have never stood up to my dad and said what needed to be said. I still can't face him now, it's almost like I feel guilty for feeling the way I do and I don't want to hurt him. Why? I do not know. I don't believe I love him, I would rather just not talk to him or even deal with the past, I just want him out of my life and I don't want to discuss it. I don't know why your sd treats you the way she is or why she is so bold in her contempt against you. I was always scared to treat my SM's bad(yes multiple) but never scared of my mom. Sm 2 did a lot for me, I never thought it was enough though. I remember when I moved in with them, she fixed up my room so pretty. New bedding, new paint, nice dresser and vanity table with a gorgeous chair. I told her it was ugly. I hated it. Why?? Just anger I guess. It's so sad that your sd is so good at manipulation because if she doesn't wake up at some point and see what she is doing, her future is going to suck. She will be miserable for a long time. I'm lucky I woke up and started seeing my mom as the good parent that loved me, my stepdad as the dad I never would have had except that he chose me and my dad was the one that I was angry at and the one who deserved the blame. And I went through some antidepressants and some therapy and some really rough struggles. My stepdad and I butted heads for some years as he was the strict parent and I thought he was just making my mom be mean to me 'just cuz' ... I can report that about 12 years ago, at 19 we just started bonding, he had been my stepdad for 14 years by then... And we are very close. Almost too close, my mom jokes that we talk more than her and I talk and she feels left out. He is my rock. He is the man I measure all men to. It took a long time, a lot of heartache and very bad behavior but I finally straightened up and 'got it'. I know right now, you probably don't care about that but I just wanted to share. I hope the meds start working. If not, it should be readdressed to the dr. And you are right, I do not believe that anxiety is keeping SD out of school, I think she is playing the little victim and come Monday, her booty better be back in school or dad seriously needs to consider the evaluation. I wonder what would happen if he took her for one without mom's consent. Would mom press this in the courts?? Is he worried about contempt charges? Because at this point, what is mom going to say 'she is so out of control, I can't deal with her, but I don't think she is so out of control that she needs to see someone and be evaluated... But she shouldn't go to school for however long she feels she shouldnt'. That would go over great!!!

"While I think SS should stop moving GFs in and out like the house has a revolving door and stop exposing GS to his latest woman until or unless it is a true stable relationship expected to grow and become long term (yeah, fat chance given SS other issues), I kinda see where your DH is coming from on this one (unless DH plans are for this to be a ongoing 'solution'). " I have made this very point to DH MANY times. This is live in GF # 3 in the past 2 year.s GS gets very attached to the new "mommy" yes SS even had him calling last GF "Mommy", then BM hears how nice GF's are and gets upset. Add to it that my DH is paying half (at least) of the house pyt. So SS now again has a new live in, 2 new puppies in addition to the old one he cant pay vet bills for. He continues to make poor life decisions and DH doesn't think he is doing anything wrong. (so I do not let DH suck me into these convos any more) IMHO GS does suffer being put in the middle. DH said last night GS got upset and cried & hid in the closet after his mom called and decided to come get him. DH & SS of course blame everything on BM. Yes, I know I am planning on not being around for another 10 years of this but poor GS! And if only this were a temp solution,but it's really the same old same old. I am trying to just turn it over, remain univolded because I am really powerless here regarding this situation. I think it's just incredibly frustrating to me to realize so many years have gone by and so much of my marriage has been spent wrapped up in all this and even giving him the house and moving away, us being to broke to do the things we would like to do or go places we would like to go because he cant just let SS figure & deal with his stuff. I am still getting sucked into all the drama-even having to listen to it I feel my blood pressure rise. Ugh..thanks for listening. ~Cat