|
| I am 30yrs old and my husband is 39 we have been married for two yrs but together for 8 yrs. In the begin of our relationship we were sexually Active now ; i be lucky to get sex twice a month. When i brought to his attention he said he tired. The sad new a yearv ago he did the same thing come to find out he was cheating . He admited that will never happen. Now i am very suspecious because of what had happened in the past. I dont want to cheat on him, but i am lonely specially at night. |
Follow-Up Postings:
|
- Posted by worriedone 5 (My Page) on Sun, Jan 20, 13 at 21:37
| I have a friend whose husband has three girlfriends that he put up in apartments in the various cities he must go to. They are very young. Very pretty. And very well taken care of. In fact, one of them is beneficiary of a nice life insurance policy. My friend has been in the hospital for an overdose of some kind of pill every time she found the girlfriend. She filed for divorce from him "five separate times". Me? Been in a marriage for 28 years where I had to ask permission to paint a wall, buy a microwave You know what you need to do. Love isn't cheating on each other. Love isn't not wanting to touch the other. I am not sure exactly what you have. I stayed for the child we made together. Knowing all the while, as soon as she was grown and on her own "I was going to be free". The divorce is final in March 2013. I have been honest and no fooling around with him. I needed to be honest to me, too. I am NOT going to ask his permission any more. I don't think I will miss him, either. Good luck. Make good choices. Either he will desire to save his marriage ( mine did not care to) or he too, will want out. Be adults. No silly crazy fights. Just hug and say goodbye if you both want out. Then, go live your life for awhile. Get to know you. Learn something new about yourself and share it with those that love you. Do something unselfish for others, too. :) (post edited to remove "capitalized" words :) |
This post was edited by worriedone on Tue, Jan 29, 13 at 12:37
|
- Posted by amyfiddler (My Page) on Tue, Jan 22, 13 at 14:59
| Worriedone, You might consider no longer using all caps on select words in your posts. if you want to emphasize a word, you might try putting quotation marks around it. this way, you get your point across without seeming to be yelling or overly dramatic. Original poster: If you feel your only option is to cheat yourself, why not consider separation instead? I didn't follow your original post either: "He admited that will never happen." I "think" what you mean is that he promised it would never happen again...? It sounds like the two of you struggle with intimacy inside and outside of the marriage. Why not ask him if he is happy with the way things are? If he isn't, what is he willing to to do see a change? Therapy? If he is happy, you can explain that your are not. Sounds to me like there is a lot of talking that is not happening in your marriage. It must be lonesome and painful. Cheating is not the answer. |
|
- Posted by amyfiddler (My Page) on Tue, Jan 22, 13 at 17:15
| I meant to say "It sounds like the two of you struggle with intimacy inside and outside of the 'bedroom'". |
|
| Yeah I think I need to agree with amyfiddler's response, i.e., "It sounds like the two of you struggle with intimacy inside and outside of the 'bedroom'". Sex is just the culmination of everything else going on in the relationship. If not it's just a selfish act where each person is using the other to give their own body a thrill. Marriage is supposed to be about a lot more than that. It should be an expression of the love relationship between the two of you. It's going to be hard to pull that off if you feel and act separate from each other in every other room in the house. Until a marriage is built on a solid foundation of commitment, communication and compromise it will have a shaky support structure. What I'd do is read as much as I could from those who have a successful marriage. |
|
- Posted by worriedone (My Page) on Tue, Jan 29, 13 at 12:34
| thank you amyfiddler "great" idea! lol. wasn't sure how to emphasize since there isn't the darkening tool to select. I am big on that. does it seem like yelling when it just one word, tho? |
|
- Posted by LuAnn_in_PA (My Page) on Wed, Jan 30, 13 at 8:51
| "wasn't sure how to emphasize since there isn't the darkening tool to select" Which is why most people use caps... Whole sentences is shouting; select words is emphasis. |
|
- Posted by Bulldog123 (My Page) on Wed, Jan 30, 13 at 13:18
| I am late to this post, but I completely sympathize. I have been married for almost 7years now-and the marriage is almost on its last leg. Long story short-We met in Jan 2006 - got married in March 2006. Fell deeply in love, everything was great. Then I discovered he had a gambling addiction & low testosterone developed. Consequently sex became non existant. He kept promising that things would get better. We went from an apartment to a house. Then the obsession with money replaced the gambling. Now I basically had a melt down and said that I don't want to live this way. He moved out. He says he still wants the marriage so he is going to try to date me and see if we can recapture something. If not--divorce. I have to say that I love sex. I am 37 and still wanting to rock. This is like a cruel joke! I am not glad for peoples pain, but I am glad I am not alone. |
Please Note: Only registered members are able to post messages to this forum. If you are a member, please log in. If you aren't yet a member, join now!
Return to the Marriage Forum
Instructions
- You must be a registered member and logged in to post messages on our forums.
- Posting is a two-step process. Once you have composed your message, you will be taken to the preview page. You will then have a chance to review the contents and make changes.
- After posting your message, you may need to refresh the forum page in order to see it.
- It is illegal to post copyrighted material without the owner's consent.
- HTML codes are allowed in the message field only.
- No advertising is allowed in any of the forums.
- If you would like to practice posting or uploading photos, please visit our Test forum.
- If you need assistance, please Contact Us and we will be happy to help.