I started talking with my kids when they were small. I talked to them most when they were in Jr. High because there were 'stories' that I heard at work (social services) about kids their age playing sex games at school. My kids confirmed that some of that stuff goes on... where kids are giving each other oral sex for recreation. They didn't consider themselves boyfriend/girlfriend and didn't consider it sex if it was oral. It was one of the deciding factors in leaving the area, the County we were in had the highest teen pregnancy rate (per capita) in the state. I was seeing that in cases I worked and even now, my kids tell me that almost all of their friends from that time have either had a baby in high school, involved in drugs (some both) or dead from drugs or car accidents. Very few have finished high school and gone to college. Makes me glad I talked a lot to my kids and left. We moved to an affluent area and even here, the kids say there is some of that activity but not as much. The major difference is back where we used to live, the families were primarily single parent households and not a lot of supervision. Here, the parents aren't supervising because they are busy with high paying careers that keep them too busy to supervise the kids and some of these kids are more able to do what they want because they've been given cars, credit cards, and too much freedom. The common denominator is lack of parental involvement or supervision. My sons didn't date in high school. My younger son let his grades slide in his third semester of college because he really liked a girl in some of his classes. She got him to buy her things and give her rides to school every day and kinda led him on, then midway through the semester, they got a job together and she started dating a guy from work. Then he had to go to school AND work with her and he was crushed/felt used. He is going back to school next week and doesn't want to think about girls until he graduates. My older son didn't have a girlfriend until he was just out of high school. My daughter is also not interested in finding a boyfriend or dating and she just graduated high school. My step daughter is 9 and breaks her neck looking at any guy she sees and thinks they are all (teenage and older guys) checking her out. We've talked to her about priorities and self respect but she still gets all crazy when she's around ANY guy. We can probably talk to her until we're blue, but she has modeled after her mom that likes to be a flirty party girl and needs to have a man in her life to feel good about herself. We'll continue talking to SD about it and hope some of it sinks in, but as she gets older, only time will tell if she'll be receptive to the message her dad wants her to get. For that reason, DH and I are dreading her high school years.

I've never been and will never (well never say never...but likely not). I was quite unpopular and felt very unsupported in my academic ambitions by the adults in my school as well, so I have zero loyalty. I also have a terrible memory and would remember almost no-one's name. I went to a wedding a few years ago and sat with some of the girls I was in high school band with. It was excruciatingly uncomfortable. One kept on bragging about her DOCTOR husband's suit he had HANDMADE in ITALY - as if none of us had ever left the country. She also made a big deal about having moved RIGHT DOWNTOWN (into our little city from our little town of origin). I was honestly almost embarrassed for her, her definitions of success and cosmopolitanism were so...small? Edited to add: I was also grumpy that day because I misused a hair product and looked like I stuck my finger in a greasy light socket. Turns out that beachy salt spray is supposed to be used on DRY curly hair, not wet! Fortunately my friends rum and coke helped me forget the hair situation.

It's really not hard for me to conceive of "no rain and long days". living in one of the driest areas in the nation (#1 in the Summer!) and going 9-10 months without a drop of rain, makes me very familiar with this issue. When I mentioned supplemental watering, perhaps you've misunderstood. No where did we make mention of OP having a 'huge swath of lawn'. I hardly think planting a few (maybe 8-15) types of shade loving plants (see Dougs drawing) as well as some native types, and having some drip irrigation, is going to cost an arm and leg or drain the state reservoirs. the area receives 38" average rainfall a year. I realize the numbers could be down, but nowhere near what our numbers are here in so cal. We've been averaging 5-9" over the last few years. So, I mentioned the supplemental watering for those few months where you don't get any rainfall. It's not that much! All you people are acting like we're proposing he plants acres of lawn! stop w/the dramatics and understand having a few plants that need a little extra watering in the summer is completely reasonable! Let me just share this tidbit regarding water conservation. I had the district water supervisor to my house to talk about water issues w/my home. because I have koi ponds that need frequent water changes, I was concerned about going over my limit and paying a fortune. He told me I was well within normal usage (and I have lawns and plenty of flowers and plants!) Anyway, he said during the summer they end up dumping thousands and thousands of gallons of water out to the ocean because of bacteria buildup. he said people do such a good job of not using water, the water sits in the sun and accumulates harmful bacteria that they can't treat safely and then use for potable water. So every few days they have to dump it. they don't even get to use it for irrigation. it's dumped down to the ocean. great huh? he said if the public knew about it they'd have a fit. so here we are letting our lawns die (which looks like crap and makes the neighborhood look like a ghetto. Badge of honor? I don't think so) while they dump off the water. On top of that great news, the water company isn't making the same revenue, so now they increase the rates to the people who have so diligently cut back on their usage. So here's my take on that,,,,,conserve water, have all your landscaping die off, and get charged more money,,,,, only to have the saved water get thrown down to the ocean. Yeah, no. not happening. I'll water my lawn and my plants as I see fit. I won't be wasteful and i'll conserve where I can (I water w/my pond water that's getting changed out) and let the lawn stay a tad on the dry side w/o completely dying.

Does anyone know why the Saturday multi-feature matinees ended? My dad talks about seeing several cartoons, news reels, and a feature when he was a kid in the 30s. Sounds like it lasted thru the 40's and into the 50's, but was entirely gone by the 60's ... why? We still had that available in the sixties. I went in the late fifties and stopped by age 11 (1962) when my friends and I started going to the Friday night movies instead. I babysat 3 young children throughout middle school and high school and on Saturdays I was allowed to walk them to the Kiddie Matinee, drop them off and come back for them a few hours later to walk them home, giving me some paid time off. I loved the formality back then. The theater manager would great everyone personally taking tickets at the door wearing a dark suit. Even at the Saturday matinee. During the kiddie matinee they would have contests and sometimes a live guest between movies. When I turned 12 my mother recruited me as a movie buddy for Wednesday nights. We would have dinner out at some cafe or even at a store counter and then go to the movies. Always sat in the loge area in the good seats. A short time later I went to my first drive-ins on dates and with friends but we continued our Wednesday nights for several years. Another thing that in my opinion used to be better back then was that Disney ran their movies on a six year schedule. That way each generation got to see the Disney classics when they reached an optimal age to view it. It made it special. Just like you used to have to actually go to Disneyland to get mouse ears. Special and magical. A child's first movie experience was usually one of those Disney classics and it was unheard of to take a crying baby into a theater.