I do not like things like that. When I worked I usually never joined in on group gifts or parties for folks I really did not know~~I just made it a policy to say,' if I want to give a gift I will buy my own gift and give it to the person'. May see cold rude whatever, but I always said it and did what I wanted.

Never heard of a "mommy shower" and it sounds like something invented to get more gifts.

I'm with YogaLady.... that stuff doesn't belong at work.

That first shower is bound to create hard feelings once folks are back at work and the invitees start gabbing about the event.

For the 2nd? Sounds like a new invention to me, too.
Kind of like the "push gift" that new fathers are being persuaded to give the moms after delivery. (And the latter has become a marketing trend, too -- if you google that term -- or "push present" -- you'll see "helpful" websites with suggestions and probably retail links.)

Here's a humorous column on the latter:

Here is a link that might be useful: Huffington Post

Perhaps your co-worker is a lot closer to this woman than you are. I wouldn't dip into my gift budget to buy two gifts for someone that I wasn't close to. Are you good friends with this woman, as well?

Ask this co-worker why half of the group has not been included. A work baby shower shouldn't exclude certain individuals, unless the line is drawn between certain departments.

She suggested a psychic reading? Really? That's supposed to be something to pamper a new mother? Whacky. If you are good friends with the woman, you'll know what to get. If not good pals, I'd send my regrets in a heartbeat.

The mommy and I are not close, but we did have to work together last year. We no longer work together. I am not close to the hostess either, but she's allowed me on the outskirts of her circle. Since I am not actually a friend to either, it feels like a gift grab to me. I will send a baby gift for the baby shower, but I don't think I will be able to attend as it is during work hours at another location. I declined to attend the other shower. I already have plans for the date, so I didn't have to fib.

I heard about them a few years ago and I really think it's asking a lot from people, especially if also invited to the baby shower.

A friend of mine had a mommy pampering party for her daughter that had recently given birth, but no gifts allowed, instead all of the guests were treated to a luncheon and mani/pedi courtesy of the new grandma. Dad was home watching the baby, so mom could have a relaxing afternoon with her family/friends.

Personally, I think the "mommy shower" should be given when the last child leaves the nest. Well deserved to say the least LOL

It just sounds annoying to me. A psychic reading???

I like Matti's idea of pampering mommy after her job is done. Perhaps I don't have the prevailing view of motherhood, but I loved having babies and being close to them, and getting a mani-pedi would have been the last thing on my mind after bringing home a newborn.

ugh.

sounds like somebody in management needs to exert a little control over this junior-high-level "socializing" & greed-monster gift-grab.

I do feel like the mothers sometimes are left out;
many years ago, before it ceased to raise eyebrows, my dear cousin *got pregnant*!!!!!

She & her boyfriend had both just graduated from high school, so neither one of them had a job, or benefits, or money.

or anything.

but they were happy about the baby, & they got married & are still married today.

He joined the military & got shipped off to...somewhere...& she stayed with her parents.

At that time, I had a whole bunch of aunts, & they all got together & threw a baby shower for their niece, & it was loads of fun.

I was a little younger than my cousin, but I did have an income (I had a paper route!), so I was excited to get to choose & buy a baby gift & attend the shower like any other mature grown-up.

My mother & all the aunts couldn't make me understand how very much *stuff* a new baby needs, & I was flabbergasted at the piles of merchandise that were accumulating for this little thing that had an estimated size at arrival of maybe 7 or 8 pounds.

I figured he (turned out to be she) had enough loot, & my cousin wasn't getting one single thing!

so I bought her a very pretty pale yellow nightgown, & it was a hit.

Poor planning for her host a work baby shower, and include only part of the group. Will the shower take place at work, or off site?

Actually, I think shower guest lists should include good friends. I'm not a big fan of the office shower format. While some co-workers do become personal friends; others do not.

As for the mommy shower, that is definitely a close-friend kind of thing. Psychic reading, seriously?

Greedy, greedy, and so very ill-mannered. Miss Manners often speaks plainly about this in her columns. I would not attend either event and if I weren't close to the recipient, I would simply offer a hearty congratulations after the birth.

Sounds greedy and impractical to me. As Alisande said, with a newborn, a mother is so busy with her baby that a fortune teller is the last thing she would make time for. If there is time to spare, a nap or a lovely and long shower (the wet kind) would fill the bill for any new mom I have known.

Someone was out walking in the rain without headgear.

Contracted that new fever - "water on the brain"?

Not much similarity to ebola ... but it might make a non-involved co-worker ... feel like throwing up?

o j

I totally agree with Sylvia on this one -- UGH!!!