Lilo, please tell us if you come home with a smashing new outfit. The evening sounds like fun and is for a good cause -- even if their vocabulary is faulty. :)

oh, Kathleen, it might be better than you imagine. I think they last about 1 1/2 hours. Depends on time outs etc. Years ago I didn't give a hoot about sports. Finally was compelled to go because youngest is an all sports kid. She plays in school and took me to college games too. I prefer college game over high school. Not as rough, they seem to play cleaner, while jr High and high school is soooo rough! DD played an advanced team last summer and I got to know the rules and the plays so much better which helped me to enjoy what I was seeing. It's as though all of us parents watched for the great plays and lousy calls. I didn't holler in disgust but some parents where pretty good at it! lol! I was good at cheering them on, our girls actually asked us to be louder so they could hear us as they ran. Guess I'm saying, the more you understand what's happening the better the game! Hope you do have fun even if it's just watching the girls enjoy it. :) Their time here is half over by now I'm guessing. What have you gotten from this experience?

We had fun but I couldn't hear most of the conversation as we were at a big, long table. The only time I could hear is when the people on my end were talking. The comedy club was packed, really too small for the number of people there. It was fun, though. Both comedians were good. Funny, we were celebrating one of the nurses leaving our hospital and going on to better things, and who should be there too, but one of the higher ups who caused the problems we are going through! She actually came over and said hi and Kristin told her why we were there.

I just had to respond since Ive been enduring this sort of thing for... gulp...ten years. So maybe Ill just start off by saying -it wouldnt hurt to just start putting out feelers for someone with whom you can rehome the younger kitty,while shes still young. Dont feel you have to give her away to the first taker or anything like that - but if you come across someone you like and trust who could take her and make the situation better for all three of you - well, that could be the best thing. While I like what Anzz wrote and would certainly try it out, I have to say I regret not rehoming my aggressor early on- I just kept thinking it would work out but it never did- and I really was and still am fond of the little devil and really really wanted it to work. So now Im kinda stuck because people generlaly dont want old cats over 10 and with health issues (yeah I did ask around recently). I now have screen doors up in my house and keep them separate on a permanent basis - they'll sniff each other butts as they are switching places throught the day but thats about it for contact. Since my older boy ( the one getting picked on) now has some health issues that are exacerbated by stress (eg the presence of the other cat) I do regret not being able to give him a better more peaceful home. He kinda has his own space in the basement which helps - hes so relaxed and king of the castle down there. Its like night and day. If I didnt have that kind of space to give him, I would be up a creek. BTW, what you are seeing is aggressive behavior on the part of your young cat. Cat aggression can be subtle and we humans can easily miss it or mistake it for playing. It can take the form of stalking, staring, poking with a paw, guarding the litter box (or food dish or any resource like a favorite chair or your lap). She's not a "bad" cat, she's just doing what nature intended - Ive heard two females are like two males - ie more likely to not get along than 1 male + 1 female. Pam Johnson writes a lot about inter-cat conflict - even as a long time cat staff person, I learned a few things. Bradshaw's Cat Sense is good too. Finally, some good science based info on cat behavior.