I am very sorry to hear how upset you are. o.k. so, none of us are perfect. None of us are getting any younger. And many of us have way too many extra pounds.

Do something nice for YOU. Really, go buy some basic makeup and try it. Foundation, a little blush, eyeliner. Go to a salon and get your hair colored and styled. Many, many women have thinning hair (it's not just a man's problem) A good stylish can give you maximum effect with the right cut and style.

We all have our battles to fight. Mine is weight also. You are getting help which is good.

Please, please go do something nice for yourself today. I truly hope you feel a little better.

You are not alone in being critical of yourself after seeing a photo of yourself.
When we look in the mirror, we don't necessarily see what others see. A photo can highlight unattractive features because it is not animated.

I had the same reaction to a photo of myself, husband and two daughters on vacation in front of a volcano. What should have been a lovely keepsake was not because of how I looked! I have since dropped some of the weight, but certainly have more to go.

Yes, there are some people who are not concerned with how they look. Or to themselves they look just fine! I have to hand it to those who think they look fine, but just not what the rest of the population would think.

From your posts, I feel you are a caring and sensitive person. There is nothing wrong with wanting to look nice!

I would start with your weight. Not because of how you look, but how you feel. Difficulty walking, aches and pains etc that could lessen as you lose weight. I am a life time of Weight Watchers. I am only now required to go once a month. It keeps me on track. You see women who who are like yourself, those who are close yo goal etc., the comraderie is good.

Good for you that you go to the support group. But, because you are sharing this here, does it mean you don't share it there?

Can you afford to treat yourself to a really good haircut? I know that I feel awful,on my bad hair days. I have frizzy dry hair that looks horrible when it's humid. But because I have learned how to deal with it using really good products, most days I look okay!

I was never a make up person. For year I only used mascara and blush. Not I use under eye makeup, shadow, liner etc. I can't use facial make up because of how dry my skin is, but just the little I use, makes a difference.

And then there's clothes. Nowadays with all the plus size choices, there is no excuse to not have an outfit or two that makes you feel good.

Do you have a few close friends that you can go shopping with? Make a day of it and go for lunch? Or, just meet for lunch or a movie. Sometimes getting things on the calendar gives you things to look forward to.

Don't be hard on yourself. From your posts I know you have family that cares a great deal for you. And so do your GW friends.

((((Hugs)))))

((((satine)))

I know how you feel Satine. I feel the same way. When I came here to Michigan I started walking. Everyday I walked a little further. I was up to 2 miles in the morning and a mile and a half at night. I decided to start wearing different new shoes, a brand I have never worn before. It lasted a few days and then I got this pain in my foot. Now I can't walk very far and it starts hurting all over again. I haven't worn those shoes since. The pain is on my right foot right behind the arch. I think it might be my tendons but I am not sure. When I go back to SD in 2 weeks I will go to my chiropractor and I hope she can help. Until then no more walking for me. I thought I might lose some weight with the walking but that took care of that for me. I hope you start feeling better about yourself. These ladies gave you some good suggestions.

Oh, gosh! Nothing like a candid photo to reveal us to ourselves!

My OMG moment came via a picture snapped six summers ago while our then-three-year-old DGS was helping me water the pots on our terrace.

WHO IS THAT SKELETAL WRETCH with the dowager's hump and the pipe-stem legs? (See? Whether it's too much or too little, weight can be a 'right bugger', as the Brits say in old movies.) You may have extra chins. I have hollow cheeks and a turkey wattle under my chin. I plan to donate my body to science; they can trace all my veins from the outside! My former mane of heavy hair is thinning at the crown. My earlier 'model's hands' are wrinkled, with swollen joints and striated nails.

Still...we do what we can with what we've got! I cover up my pipe-stems now. I keep my nails short and buffed. I do brows, lashes, blush and lipstick every morning -- powder makeup if I'm going 'out'. I have a good cut and color as needed. I try to remember my posture.

Neither horses nor small children have shied from me yet. As for other people, well, they don't know what I *used* to look like! We on the KT are only interested in your inner beauty anyway!

Satineâ¦.with all the problems you have gone through in recent years, you still remained a beautiful person in my eyes. So, buy some walking shoes, get your hair done and the new do and the fresh air will make you feel really good. A few months from now you'll start to look as good as you feel.

I am MUCH happier with this strong capable woman I am now than with the pretty young girl I was. I'm proud of Deborah. Debbie was a sweet girl but she was no Deborah !

I can't stand my pictures, I always think I look terrible. Its probably not true of what your thinking either. Lets try not to be so hard on ourselves.
I'm not vain but I do try to look my best.

Do you like the support group? Weight Watchers, etc have support groups as well. Couldn't hurt to go. So what, even if you are the biggest one there-everyones there for the same purpose! Do you have a dog?? Dogs like walks and if you have one, he would be thrilled to go for a stroll. Everything starts with the first step, which is also the hardest. I wasn't thrilled with some of my recent vacation photos either, Putting off looking at gyms, I know I physically feel much better when I exercise. I'm always glad after I do. Once you stop for a day or two, its hard not to just revert back to old ways instead of keeping up. Nothing is ever going to be perfect, but improvements can be made one by one, such as only drink diet soda instead of regular. Complexion is a relatively easy fix if you visit a dermatologist, hair can get a style or coloring, Pick one thing for yourself this week and do it! You deserve it. Its hard to admit all the stuff that you did, We are rooting for you! Also-if you don't already-watch Biggest Loser-it just started last week. Its inspirational.

Are you on meds? I am and the meds I take do make my hair thinner, but I take Biotine and gelatin capsules with the Dr's OK. That helps a bit, One step/one day at a time will help. You are in a support group--OK but is this the right one for you? Weight watchers is good. Complexion can be helped by the type of make up you use, and diet and the type of soap you use. Avon has some good product, so does Oley (over the counter). Good luck Check with your Dr. and/or dietitian You may be allergic to some make up I am and use nothing on my face or around my eyes.
Again, take one thing at a time

I don't want to see pictures of myself. And I can't stand hearing myself on the answering machine. A few years ago a young man hit my, parked, car in front of my office. The police came and asked me for my license, registration and proof of insurance. The officer, who looked all of 13 years old, looked at my drivers license, looked at me, looked at my drivers license, and said, "This must have been taken a while ago!" I wanted to bend him over my knee and give him a good "paddlin'"! LOL

I've had several bad picture moments. Honestly, that camera finds things I don't see when I'm looking in the mirror. I'm a bit freaked out by the reverse image of what I see when when I look in the mirror.

You may be overweight, but that doesn't mean you can't look good. As others have suggested, get a good cut and color for your hair. I also get my brows waxed, but maybe you don't need that. Get yourself a few flattering tops in a color or cut that looks good on you. They don't have to be fancy or expensive. Make it something that you look forward to wearing each day when you get dressed.

I've figured out a trick for looking better in pictures. You use your cell phone and take selfies. Lol! Hold your camera up above your face so you have to look up. It's slimming and if you control the light, you control which wrinkles show. ;) Try it. It's lots of fun.

I hope you are feeling better about yourself tomorrow. :)

I've had several bad picture moments. Honestly, that camera finds things I don't see when I'm looking in the mirror. I'm a bit freaked out by the reverse image of what I see when when I look in the mirror.

You may be overweight, but that doesn't mean you can't look good. As others have suggested, get a good cut and color for your hair. I also get my brows waxed, but maybe you don't need that. Get yourself a few flattering tops in a color or cut that looks good on you. They don't have to be fancy or expensive. Make it something that you look forward to wearing each day when you get dressed.

I've figured out a trick for looking better in pictures. You use your cell phone and take selfies. Lol! Hold your camera up above your face so you have to look up. It's slimming and if you control the light, you control which wrinkles show. ;) Try it. It's lots of fun.

I hope you are feeling better about yourself tomorrow. :)

Even young, great looking people can look bad in pictures sometimes. And if you happen to be talking when your picture is taken, forget it!

I second Adellabedella's suggestion about selfies. The other advantage to taking your own pictures is you can trash all the ones you don't like.

People have told me I'm photogenic. I reply, "I'm really not. My secret is I take all the pictures myself, and I delete most of them." :-)

People who know you and love you see your inner beauty.

Satine, I'm right there with you, Dear! I can't BELIEVE how much I've aged in the last year. I hate looking in the mirror - I have the 'old lady' staring back at me and it scares me, but I ain't dead and for that I'm grateful! Since it beats being 6' under, I just accept it and avoid mirrors and pictures of myself. I am still beautiful inside - everything works as it's supposed to! LOL

I got a face time call on my Iphone and just about had a heart attack when I saw my haggard face staring back at me! It also doesn't help when you are looking down at your phone to answer it, talk about sags and wrinkles. And I always thought I looked pretty good.

I don't find anything wrong with being vain, though. It's what keeps me exercising and eating lots of fruits and vegetables. My problem is eating through depression, of which I seem to cycle through. I gain weight when I am depressed, and I also don't like to exercise.

My OMG moment came when I decided to quit coloring my hair and just go gray~~it really freaked out my 5 year old granddaughter. She sits on my lap facing me and going through my hair like a monkey picking fleas off it's mate. She says it would be appropriate for her to start calling me 'old granny' now, with my gray hair, the lines on my upper lips and my wrinkly skinny hands LOL!! I said OK that is fine~she spent a while weekend calling me that. We had lots of discussions on how people age, but that does not change who they are inside and that is where the persons loving spirit comes from not from the outside. She got used to it and saw I was still her grandma even if I wa gray.

I find that I look better in pictures with my sun glasses on. I am not sure why, so now I will leave sunglasses on outside and grab my reading glasses really quick to do inside pictures. I am the only one in the family that looks so horrible in pictures. I do not think it has anything to do with aging:(

You're right I can't solve them. I am sitting right there with you. Here for you.

My hair is very thin. I think all those years of getting perms and curling it, really took a toll on it.
the solution...... I got a plxie cut. It is soooo short! Took sometime getting used to it, but oh so easy up keep.

Satine, we all have days like that. Take it one day at a time. Figure out what you don't like the most and start working on that, then move on to the next. With me it was my weight, so I started the reverse diet. By that I mean I eat more for breakfast and less for dinner. The weight will start coming off gradually. I did not and will not buy anyting diet. I eat everything I always eat. By eating more for breakfast you have all day working it off. I lost about 20 pounds in 6 months by doing that a few years ago. Good luck to you I'm wishing you the best.

At this stage in life all I can hope for is to look good...for my age..67. Fortunately my husband still sees me as the girl he knew at 16.

Just know I am reading all your posts and appreciate them. Im really trying to get a hold of this but having a bit of trouble. I do appreciate your support. Satine