Sometimes there is assistance available for retraining, too. My neighbor is a CAD/CAM operator and there are very few jobs in that field now. The state is sending him to community college to learn commercial graphic arts. My sis was laid off from Kmart last March and was unemployed until the end of November. She now does the same work she did at Kmart at Lowes, and earns a bit more than Kmart paid. But she worked and worked to get a job. She did the newspaper ads, the online ads, the stop by and drop off a resume thing at every place she could think of. She had applied for a job at Lowes earler, but the cash office position she was trained for was already filled by the time they ran want ads for the new store. She ended up going to their hiring office as soon as she heard the next store was going in. She was hired (by a Kmart alumni) before they advertised for workers for that store. She tried so very hard to find a job, and in the end it really did come down to good luck with timing. Tell DH we are all pulling for him. It is hard to stay optimistic. I am so proud of my sis for getting through that difficult time so well. Our economy is changing, and the little guy gets lost in the wash. I am certain that the letter, along with the tax form, will get your kids what they need. You might also look into local food banks. Here, a family can get a box of food from the local food pantry every month, even if they are over the limit for food stamps. There is also the federal commodities food available (you know, the cheese and peanut butter and canned goods), I think people can qualify for that even if they don't get food stamps, too. Plus, there is a program called SHARE. It gives local producers of foods a place to sell surpluses and so you get fresh meats, fruits, and veggies for a very low price. It is usually run out of a church or community center and volunteers portion out the goods. For SHARE, there is no income requirement. You do need to sign up for it ahead of time. And, heaven forbid, if your family is still not back on your feet by the holidays, please check into the different service organizations (Goodfellows, Lions Club, etc.) for food, gifts and clothes for the holidays. One of my counseling clients was very angry when one of the town service organizations brought his family food and presents at Christmas. We talked about it a lot. He finally was able to see that the people who were being so kind to his family were doing so out of love and generosity and that it made them feel so good to help him. He had served his community as a scout leader, as a town councilman, as a volunteer in other activities. His kids were also involved in service activities. He was able to remember how he felt when his family was able to help others and in the end, decided that others deserved that feeling, too. Instead of him fuming and ruining the holidays for his family, they were all able to feel grateful and accept the love of their community with grace. In my eyes, this is what makes humans special - the ability to give of ourselves selflessly. Accept any assistance you can find and don't let judgemental people make you justify your choices.

Every business, commercial, construction, & consumer loan I've ever closed has included a statement stating that the information contained within the application was accurate as of the day of closing. The actual forms used varied substantially depending on the type of loan; but somewhere in the pile of papers that I put in front of borrowers was that statement... Be aware that if requested to initial and/or sign your application's accuracy at closing & you remain silent about your employment status...that is bank fraud. By including your income & having it verified by your lender...you are using that income to evidence your ability to service the debt. It sounds like your income is not necessary to qualify for the re-finance. However, bank fraud is bank fraud & never a good thing. How far along is your underwriting? You mentioned a mid-July closing. That's still a long ways off. When does your lock expire? If loss of your income really doesn't negatively impact your ratios...your lender should be able to make the adjustments long before a mid-July closing. And, you'll sleep much better knowing you were up front & honest in the information you provided to the lender & that they are, in turn, relying on. It's a bit trickier if you're still actually working on the day you close the re-finance. But, since you've had 'material notice' of the lay-off well in advance of closing the loan...your application is less than 100% truthful. You'll have to decide if you can live with that decision. Hmmm, I just thought about something. My DH is head of all leading at a large regional financial institution. He mentioned to me a few weeks ago (back during all the news hype over escalating layoffs) that they were asking employers when they called for employment verification whether any layoffs were planned at the company. DH said that some companies provided the information & others refused. But, there might be 'some' chance your re-finance lender will find out about your layoff directly from your employer. I have no idea how large that chance might be? Sorry about the loss of your job but glad to hear you'll be OK on just your DH's income. /tricia

I am not sure about a 401K, but you can take money out of an IRA to put down on a house without penalty. You still have to pay income taxes on it. If you take the BF's take-home income and subtract court-ordered child support, whatever he is required to pay for daycare, if anything, one half of his daughter's medical bills, and one half of her extracurricular activities (I would estimate that half would be at least $50 a month), then subtract whatever he spends on his vehicle and on his hobbies and any remaining debt, the remainder is what he has available to contribute to the household. Also keep in mind that private independent schools and some colleges will take your income, subtract about $30,000, subtract whatever you pay in student loans, and then compute the expected contribution from your income as 30% of the remainder. (There are a few other things they subtract, but that is most of it). If your income is $200K, that amount will exceed the cost of a private school, so the daughter can forget going to a private high school and likely forget getting much financial aid for college either, even if she is living with her mother. Unless of course you are willing to pay for it. On the other hand, if neither parent is remarried, and the mother earns, as an example, $30,000, the schools will estimate their expected contribution at somewhere around $10,000, I believe, making her eligible for quite a bit of financial aid. Of course these figures are far from exact, and would be affected by any additional children or medical bills, etc, and you obviously shouldn't take my word for it because I am not a financial planner. A prenup will not affect what the schools or the government determines is the Expected Family Contribution. In my opinion, if a wealthy prospective spouse is not prepared to pay for independent school and for college for the stepchildren, then it is unfair for them to marry and screw up their stepchildren's lives, financially speaking.

According to the U.S. Census, the article continues, median income in 2014 was $53, 567. , which is 6.5% below the pre-recession level of 2007 and down 7.2% from its peak in 1999. - Again this just points out the problem with statistics...First, income is down, but disposable income is up. So we are really better off. Second, this idea that most haven't gotten a raise is complete B.S. you have to understand what you are looking at with stats or you get really scary and grim pictures. Stats can be misinterpreted either on purpose or just because the person doing the investigation doesn't realize it, Yes the average household makes less money today than it did in 1999 - but household size has decreased dramatically. The number of single income households more than doubled, the number of children per family dropped, and that is exactly why discretionary spending is way up. So while a 7.2% drop seems significant, it becomes much less significant when the people the income must support dropped almost 20%. Finally, stop looking at all income earners and look at full time workers - if you look at the top 80% you get a different picture. Yes the bottom 20% has had a 17% drop since 1999 and is crushing the statistics. But those are not full time workers, we have had a serious increase in the number of part time workers, and a decline in the hours they work, which is a discussion in and of itself but not one relating to middle income earners and the plight of the full time worker heading to retirement. Added to this that the whole idea of middle class has changed dramatically. One could argue that the whole concept is dated to the extent of no longer being useful. The idea of the middle class came about because it drew a line between certain "haves" and "have nots" - today that line is blurry at best. Access to good reliable internet, entertainment options, telephone communications, access to somewhat reliable transportation, and access to education are no longer restricted to a middle class. Compare the convenience and lifestyle of today's full time career workers below the middle income line to those people in the 1970's well above the middle income line, and see who has it rougher. Edit: At this point I will jump out of this thread - I will close with this - No matter how old you are, if you can read this take a few minutes to make sure you are making sensible contributions to a retirement plan that is risk appropriate for your age.