Agnespuffin There's no doubt she's retarded but she may be beginning dementia as well. She isn't interacting with the other residents because she really doesn't know how. The rehab is in the same section as assisted living and it seems most of those people are fairly intelligent from what I've seen. In the nursing home section most of them are about like vegetables. The ones who aren't don't have their mind. She interacts with the employees but they get paid to interact! Some of them say they just love her but I'm sure there's some who probably don't really like her. As for being alone all day, she is never alone. I think she'd talk all day long if she had someone to talk to but there's only so much you can talk to her about. I rack my brain trying to find something to talk to her about. I don't think anything will break the phone habit. I think that's the main reason she wants to come home so bad because she says everyone there is very good to her. I think talking on the phone makes her feel normal somehow and I know it makes her feel powerful. So does spending money. She doesn't have a lot of it either. She lives off SSI. They did have a small nest egg but when my sister took over Dad's guardianship she went through it very quickly. She's addicted to spending money too. Between what the VA pays her and Dad's check she gets around 1,500.00 a month for taking care of him and knowing my sister the way I do I'm sure she wouldn't be taking care of him if she wasn't getting the money. I'm sure you're wondering how Dad gets a VA check with his severe retardation. The fact is the military goofed up by keeping him too long. He was a good looking young man and didn't look retarded at all. They probably just thought to start with that he was just a dumb country hick. Someone in charge was't paying enough attention or wasn't too smart themselves. Twiz-- You're probably right about the NH but I can't make myself do that yet and I don't think DH would want that at this time in spite of the situation. I have to keep a firm hand with her to keep her in line. She's a little better about the phone since she knows I can see every call she makes on the bill. We also have unlimited calling for a flat fee now and that helps a lot. Actually there were a few people who like for her to call but 2 of them passed away in the last 6 months. There's a few people who expect her to call every few weeks. I think she's finally getting the message that some people don't want to talk to her. I do intend to leave her in rehab as long as possible because she needs it and so do we. She'll probably be there another 3 weeks at least. We're taking advantage of the time to just be together and also take care of some business matters. I only have Mom. My sister has dad about 800 miles away. There's no way either of us could take care of the both of them. Mom didn't want to go there and Dad didn't want to come here so it worked out for the best. It's sad to say but I don't care much for my sister because she's a manipulative very controling person so we talk very little. When we did talk a lot it was very emontionaly draining for me. I don't need that. I'm already working with her Social Worker/Case Manager at the area agency on aging to arrange respite care so we can do some of the things we want such as going fishing in the new bass boat we bought last fall. That pretty thing hasn't even been in the water yet! If we can pull everything together we plan to go to Canada in August for 2 weeks and maybe Lake Erie for a few days in Sept. As soon as the weather permits we plan to go fising in the local lakes and river at least once a week. I talked to the case worker this morning and it seems we can get respite care for like 3 days a month and up to 15 days at a time. Mom will soon be 81 and with all her health problems I'm sure she wouldn't be living today if it wasn't for the excellent care I give her. I know I can't physically handle her with her weight being what it is and I've told her this. As much as I'd hate it when the time comes that she needs lifting I'll have to send her to a NH. I already have a bad back. She loves sympathy and attention and a few months ago she was insinuating to an aide that I was mean to her. That was because I won't let her have a little dog that she can't take care of and I won't because we just lost one last Oct. and I'm still greiving over him. I told her if she thought I was mean maybe should go live with my sister and she would find out what mean is. I do beleive my sister would be abusive to her. I apologized to the aid for my outburst but I told her I have nothing to hid but I can't tolorate that kind of manipulative behavior. I think the aid may have said something to her supervisor who is the visiting nurse because the next time she came to visit she made the comment that she told the aids they are only in the home for a short time and don't really know what goes on. This aid was a fill in for her regular aid. All the regular aids and the nurses know I would never abuse her or allow anyone else to. I'm not looking for sympathy or any prizes or martyrdom, I just needed to vent a little. I don't think she'd live very long in a NH and as I said I don't think my DH would want that anymore than I do at this time. I just have to continue to be firm with her and take the necessary steps to see that DH and I can have some quality time together.

First,I tried krud cutter, soft scrub ,oops, magic eraser. The tile guy (through my contractor) said to try goof off or nail polish remover. I think davidro mentioned the tsp and muriatic acid, but when I went to the hardware store and showed the paint dept guy all the suggestions, he said that if what I used already didn't work, these others wouldn't either, and said to try the varnish remover. He said epoxy was very hard to get out and it might require a machine. DH let the varnish remover sit for 10 minutes as recommended on the can to remove epoxy and rubbed it with a wire brush, but not a blade. Davidro, I can't feel it with eyes closed. And my floor is grooved and uneven to imitate a natural stone. What it looks like is that I have a dirty floor with splash marks, plus the wheel marks.

Thanks for the ideas and questions. Sorry it has taken me so long to respond. I’m reworking my plan and really trying to take Marcolo’s ice-water-stone-fire into consideration while doing it. I’m probably not going to be able to do much more work on this until after Thanksgiving. I will probably start a new discussion with my new layout sometime after the holiday. I’ll post a link here when I do so, hopefully, you all will pop into the new discussion and give me more of your great insights. Individual responses to you all, below. I fear my responses sound argumentative but I don’t mean them that way. I just don’t understand where you are coming from and possibly need more clarification to help me see what I’m missing. Thanks again: hollysprings said: It's confusing as to what area is ''kitchen''. Is it the laundry area? If so then more than half of your appliances arent actually in the kitchen. Is it the area at the top right? Same thing. You've got stuff that you need that isn't where you need it. Either way, I don't think that takng down the wall is doing you any favors if it leaves the whole house so ill defined. @hollysprings: Right now the laundry room is just a big catch-all room which also tends to collect clutter (which drives me batty) and traffic route. If I had a use for the extra space in the laundry area, it would make sense to keep it but I don’t. I don’t sew or do any crafts that would require me sitting in a separate room to do. At 8X16 it's really just a big, wide hallway that is almost as big as my cramped 15.5x10.5 kitchen (see photo in one of my posts above). So it makes more sense to me to eliminate the big hall and put that space in the kitchen where I need more of it. Or do you mean the wall we’re taking down in the picture above, between kitchen and dining room? I don’t understand why that’s not a good thing. The kitchen is too small to expand or make many changes to the current layout, feels cramped, and the dining room is too small to be very useful either. It seems that I then just have two rooms that both function poorly. What am I missing? ---- aloha2009 said: Have you considered removing the entry wall also, since semi-imposing on access to the front door would happen only when you are seating a full 12 people (3-4x/year), I think that would open up some options for you. It would really open up the entryway, unless you are against that. I'm not sure why you are against having your stove be a focal point. Many, many,kitchens make the stove/vent the focal point which looks great! My current kitchen the frig is the focal point. I've yet to find one kitchen pic with that. I understand your love of your windows. I personally am going to add 8-12' of new windows in our kitchen into our medium sized kitchen. With or w/o the new windows I have a functioning kitchen. There's give and take in any kitchen remodel. @aloha2009: I’m not fond of removing the entry wall. I really dislike front doors that just open into the house itself without some kind of separation from living and entry areas. I’d also like to avoid that because I really like the original wood used on the entry side of that wall. It would make me sad to see it go. The prior owners already removed too much of it as it is, imho. I could make the stove/hood the focal point or I could have nice, lighted cabinets in that same location that show off some of my fun collection of serving pieces, pitchers, and my colorful “in-between” dishes. If I have a choice, I’d rather have the latter. I’m not big on appliances as focal points in general. I was really striving for more of an “un-kitchen” look, as much as practical while still having a functional layout. ---- laughable said: It will be really helpful to see your plan on graph paper. It would also be helpful if you labeled your graph paper with letters and arrows in reference to the photos taken. Label your photos: A, B, C, etc. Then label the drawings where the pictures were taken with an arrow showing the direction you were looking when you shot the picture. Like this: A---->, B---->, C----> to help us get a better feel for things. : ) I've popped on and off a few times trying to see where your thread might go and to see if I could offer any help. The one thing that comes to mind is to ask if you can put the washer and dryer anywhere else since it seems to be eating a major portion of your kitchen. Can it go where your coat closet is, or in a bathroom, or in a part of a bedroom, or in the basement (and install a laundry chute)? Anywhere but in the kitchen, LOL. We'll be able to help you more with the graph paper version, surely. @ laughable: After T-Day, I’ll work up something like you suggest with photos and such. Thanks for that suggestion. I’m surprised that the laundry area is bothering people so much. I just don’t see it as an issue. I have no place else on this floor to move it. If we put it in the coat closet, we’d have no place for coats and I see no good place to build a new closet. The bathroom isn’t big enough. I LOVE having it there as it’s close to the bedrooms, close to the kitchen where I spend a fair amount of time, so I never have any laundry piling up. If I moved it in the basement, it would be inconvenient and I know I’d keep forgetting to move the laundry along. Plus, it would mess up the Man Cave. Except for more pantry storage, which I don’t really need, I don’t see what else I would even use that space for. I mean, I guess some of the stuff I do now have in a cabinet in the basement could come up to a pantry area there but this is stuff I seldom use or things like the huge package of Costco paper towels which, because I don’t use them much, takes me about two years to go through. I’m just not convinced that the convenience of having seldom used items closer to kitchen outweighs the huge inconvenience of hauling laundry up/down stairs. Plus, I am in my late 50’s and we hope to age-out here. Carrying the laundry up/down may not be as easy when I’m 80 as it is now. Or maybe doing that will help keep me young, lol. If it helps, we are planning on putting a counter over w/d and then adding some louvered, bi-fold doors to cover the front. Does covering them up help make you more comfortable with placement?

Thanks for the tips Sleevendog! I haven't found my perfect "sweet spot" for coffee but am getting there. I much prefer the Aeropress to the "pour over" method and french press using something that is glass or china. I love the taste of beverages in glass, do not like plastic dishware in general, but experience tells me I need to stick to plastic with this frequently used appliance. I have a big Chemex that I could use if I ever had company. My folks got it in 1960 as a wedding present. Never used it to my knowledge, and I am continuing the trend. But that's because I rarely have company, not because it isn't cool! I may look into a metal filter because with the extra pressure I imagine that the paper does add something perhaps that leaches into the coffee. I was having good luck with bamboo filters for my pour over gizmo but I like the idea of a metal filter. I have tiny living quarters so probably will never invest in any type of larger counter-top appliance for coffee. Also since it is just me most of the time, a single cup method is fine for the vast majority of the days of my life. I guess I will have to read through the information you posted, but in general I am just wondering about the idea of making really strong coffee and then diluting it which is how they recommend doing it with the Aeropress, aka "cafe Americano." Why not have all the grinds interact with all the water? Also not sure why the espresso grind, other than maximum surface area interacting with the water. I like that with the press I don't get errant grinds in the coffee as I did with my french press. A minor thing really, but it used to bug me. I am also wondering about the "sludge" I get at the bottom of my cup with both the Aeropress and french press. Not a bad thing but not the best "mouth feel" for me with coffee. I'm sure it has all the flavor bits in it. As for roasts, I prefer the stronger roasts, which actually have less caffeine and acid. I supposedly need to drink low acid coffee but I do well with French roast and Sumatran. I just don't tend to like the Sumatran and other low acid coffees. I know that coffee is acidic so "low acid" is somewhat of a misnomer, but the longer I am on this low acid diet the more I realize it is not the pH/acidity that is the issue, it is the type/kind of acid. I do not know why the acids in tea and wine bother me more than the acids in coffee, but it does. Which is a bummer because I much prefer tea and wine to coffee! I've tried cold-brewing coffee, which supposedly produces a less acidic product, and the taste was underwhelming. Like I said in my previous post, the other thing I may do is go to this new local coffee roaster and try some of their product. Around where I live it is a coffee desert, not much good product available locally, and even what is reasonably good, I imagine doesn't turn over very fast on the shelves due to the cost of it. I could mail order from some good regional roasters, but I am not there yet as far as my persnickity-ness with coffee.