I've recently moved into a second floor apartment. It's a small building - only a 'four family' and so far, so good with one exception...the girl next door to me. Sound carries embarrasingly well on 'certain' occasions. I don't know her name but I certainly know what she yells at critical moments! :) That isn't the issue - what is the issue is that when she isn't ****ing, she and the boyfriend are fighting and I mean, 'You shut the **** up and do what I tell you!' sort of fighting. Yesterday, around 3am, I was awakened to extremely loud shouting and thumping, then sobbing. I decided to mind my own beeswax and put in earplugs. Tonight, however, the screaming, banging (no, not THAT kind) and crying was at such a pitch I called 911. The police came immediately but no one would open the door. I had made an 'anonymous' call so they didn't ask around. Not ten minutes after the police left, the stereo cranked up in the apartment next door - and I mean, full-tilt-booming bass and they began pounding on the floor - running from room to room, stomping as hard as they could. I guess they figured the gal below them had called the PD. The police showed up again and came barging up the back stairwell, this time, right outside my door. They demanded to know what was going on and a male voice called out, 'You're not coming in here without a warrant'. The officers called out to the girl, 'Ma'am? Are you allright?' No response. The asked the guy who was with him, and again, he said, 'Come back with a warrant. I'm done with you.' and retreated away from the door. On the way downstairs, the police were confronted by the girl who lives downstairs - she made some comment about all the noise THEY were making. She then proceeded to tell them that no, she hadn't heard anything and couldn't imagine why anyone would have called the police!?! She lives below these folks and has to deal with their rudeness on a far worse level than I do. Why would she lie? I'm now starting to be a bit concerned that perhaps I should be afraid? I live in Missouri - If I begin to feel threatened by the scrotal sac my neighbor is dating, do I have any recourse to approach my landlord about finding me another apartment? His voice, through the door, was polite, well articulated, and absolutely curdled my OB negative. That and the emphatic, 'Oh, no, I never have any problem with them' from the lady downstairs has really got me worried. Sheesh. Any advice? Anyone know of a nice Yurt in Mongolia I could rent?

Hi, Zep, I had not run the whocrashed program bc. sysnative has it's own two programs it recommends. I used those - the diagnostic one contained 18 files filled with information I would not have been able to decipher - including 2 containing the dump file info that were roughly 3 and 11 MB (roughly). But your post reminded me to download whocrashed for the future. I went ahead and ran it for curiousity's sake. The results are below. It does seem they are suggesting a bad drive - and in at least one place they point to Avast. The larger diagnostic files generated for sysnative showed all the crashes were tied to an Avast driver. I uninstalled and it's been running fine. I might want to reinstall Avast since I run it on all our home desktops and laptops. I'm familiar with it and it hasn't posed a problem elsewhere. The folks at sysnative suggest waiting a little longer and using microsoft security essentials for now. Whocrashed: On Sun 8/4/2013 10:18:38 PM GMT your computer crashed crash dump file: C:\Windows\Minidump\080413-21091-01.dmp This was probably caused by the following module: ntoskrnl.exe (nt+0x7EFC0) Bugcheck code: 0xA (0x0, 0x2, 0x1, 0xFFFFF80002CD2D6C) Error: IRQL_NOT_LESS_OR_EQUAL file path: C:\Windows\system32\ntoskrnl.exe product: Microsoft® Windows® Operating System company: Microsoft Corporation description: NT Kernel & System Bug check description: This indicates that Microsoft Windows or a kernel-mode driver accessed paged memory at DISPATCH_LEVEL or above. This appears to be a typical software driver bug and is not likely to be caused by a hardware problem. The crash took place in the Windows kernel. Possibly this problem is caused by another driver that cannot be identified at this time. On Sun 8/4/2013 10:18:38 PM GMT your computer crashed crash dump file: C:\Windows\memory.dmp This was probably caused by the following module: aswsp.sys (aswSP+0x4133E) Bugcheck code: 0xA (0x0, 0x2, 0x1, 0xFFFFF80002CD2D6C) Error: IRQL_NOT_LESS_OR_EQUAL Bug check description: This indicates that Microsoft Windows or a kernel-mode driver accessed paged memory at DISPATCH_LEVEL or above. This appears to be a typical software driver bug and is not likely to be caused by a hardware problem. A third party driver was identified as the probable root cause of this system error. It is suggested you look for an update for the following driver: aswsp.sys . Google query: aswsp.sys IRQL_NOT_LESS_OR_EQUAL On Sun 8/4/2013 9:33:50 PM GMT your computer crashed crash dump file: C:\Windows\Minidump\080413-21340-01.dmp This was probably caused by the following module: ntoskrnl.exe (nt+0x7EFC0) Bugcheck code: 0xA (0x0, 0x2, 0x1, 0xFFFFF80002C9CD6C) Error: IRQL_NOT_LESS_OR_EQUAL file path: C:\Windows\system32\ntoskrnl.exe product: Microsoft® Windows® Operating System company: Microsoft Corporation description: NT Kernel & System Bug check description: This indicates that Microsoft Windows or a kernel-mode driver accessed paged memory at DISPATCH_LEVEL or above. This appears to be a typical software driver bug and is not likely to be caused by a hardware problem. The crash took place in the Windows kernel. Possibly this problem is caused by another driver that cannot be identified at this time. On Sun 8/4/2013 8:58:12 PM GMT your computer crashed crash dump file: C:\Windows\Minidump\080413-21418-01.dmp This was probably caused by the following module: ntoskrnl.exe (nt+0x7EFC0) Bugcheck code: 0xA (0x0, 0x2, 0x1, 0xFFFFF80002CDCD6C) Error: IRQL_NOT_LESS_OR_EQUAL file path: C:\Windows\system32\ntoskrnl.exe product: Microsoft® Windows® Operating System company: Microsoft Corporation description: NT Kernel & System Bug check description: This indicates that Microsoft Windows or a kernel-mode driver accessed paged memory at DISPATCH_LEVEL or above. This appears to be a typical software driver bug and is not likely to be caused by a hardware problem. The crash took place in the Windows kernel. Possibly this problem is caused by another driver that cannot be identified at this time. On Sun 8/4/2013 6:30:46 PM GMT your computer crashed crash dump file: C:\Windows\Minidump\080413-22152-01.dmp This was probably caused by the following module: ntoskrnl.exe (nt+0x7EFC0) Bugcheck code: 0xA (0x0, 0x2, 0x1, 0xFFFFF80002CE6D6C) Error: IRQL_NOT_LESS_OR_EQUAL file path: C:\Windows\system32\ntoskrnl.exe product: Microsoft® Windows® Operating System company: Microsoft Corporation description: NT Kernel & System Bug check description: This indicates that Microsoft Windows or a kernel-mode driver accessed paged memory at DISPATCH_LEVEL or above. This appears to be a typical software driver bug and is not likely to be caused by a hardware problem. The crash took place in the Windows kernel. Possibly this problem is caused by another driver that cannot be identified at this time. ----------------------------- This report is in somewhat more plain English - but seems to contain less specific diagnostics than the tests for sysnative. thanks. Lynn. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Conclusion -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 5 crash dumps have been found and analyzed. A third party driver has been identified to be causing system crashes on your computer. It is strongly suggested that you check for updates for these drivers on their company websites. Click on the links below to search with Google for updates for these drivers: aswsp.sys If no updates for these drivers are available, try searching with Google on the names of these drivers in combination the errors that have been reported for these drivers and include the brand and model name of your computer as well in the query. This often yields interesting results from discussions from users who have been experiencing similar problems. Read the topic general suggestions for troubleshooting system crashes for more information. Note that it's not always possible to state with certainty whether a reported driver is actually responsible for crashing your system or that the root cause is in another module. Nonetheless it's suggested you look for updates for the products that these drivers belong to and regularly visit Windows update or enable automatic updates for Windows. In case a piece of malfunctioning hardware is causing trouble, a search with Google on the bug check errors together with the model name and brand of your computer may help you investigate this further.

Oh for Pete's sake, there is ABSOLUTELY no reason to think the fiance is some kind of psycho abuser wanting to molest OP's granddaughter. This is blame-shifting at it's finest. It's irresponsible and slanderous and it doesn't help the OP at all. If anything is leads her down a false path that will only make her problems with her daughter worse. Per OP, the fiance doesn't seem to like her or her husband much. He is not warm, doesn't make much eye contact and seems to avoid them to a certain extent. However, she also reports that he is civil and there's been no open hostility or disagreement or harsh words. He appears to dislike them, but has not withheld his daughters from the OP, which he could have done if he disliked her intensely. OP considers his daughters to be unruly brats who don't really belong to her family, altho she's willing to make a small effort to play step-grandmother if it's not too much trouble. The fiance did participate in the Disney breakfast altho it was clear he was not happy about it--so he's willing to accommodate her to a certain extent to keep family peace. To try to blame the estrangement on him, and then escalate him into an abusing child molester is ridiculous. In any interpersonal conflict there is fault on both sides, even though usually everyone wants to believe that they are completely innocent and misused. If you are estranged from a family member, you ARE partially at fault. People don't like hearing that; they think they must be an exception, but it doesn't work that way. And nothing can be resolved until they are willing to own their part of the problem. Nothing. In fact, it will continue to get worse as long as someone insists they are perfectly lovely and always correct and complete victim. The OP has a multi decade relationship with her daughter. It's long and complicated. But we know that her daughter worries about the OP making scenes, and that worry would be based upon past experience. We know the daughter has accused OP of trying to buy her and her children, and in fact OP did state she built a $100,000 for a 2 year old (altho I am sure that's not the only reason the pool was built I hope). The problem was severe enough, the daughter forbade further gifts and the OP worries about gifts and cards being returned. She has only recently sent a tub of popcorn at Thanksgiving which is not inappropriate, if it came before the request to stop sending gifts. If it came afterwards, it was pushy and way out of bounds. Per OP she's had problems with several other family members. And she was pushy and insensitive regarding the Disney trip. They invited themselves, and then when they found out they weren't wanted after buying the tickets but before getting on the plane, they did not change the date of their vacation or did not go as scheduled but stay away from the daughter's family (which would have been easy to do). She insisted on a breakfast. She did not respect what they wanted. We can also see from what the OP wrote that she has conflicting requirements, she doesn't want to be in large gatherings with the girls, unless it's at Disney. She doesn't like coping with all of them, but is willing to babysit. She calls them unruly, out of control and screeching, but says they are lovely. She doesn't want to take them out in public, unless apparently they are at an amusement park. We also see from the OP's post that she is reactionary, resists self insight, and lashes out easily when she doesn't hear what she wants to hear. You can imagine how difficult would be for her daughter to deal with. And the OP's rejection of her newborn son over not getting to see her daughter alone would be very painful and angering. The OP is unreasonably rigid. We see from what the OP wrote here she is very focused on what she wants and does not seem to be much aware of the wants of her daughter. That her daughter wants something different than what OP wants does not make what the daughter wants wrong or bad, just different. But OP doesn't see that, she only sees that it is not what she wants and finds that sufficient basis to judge her daughter's wants as being wrong. Two strong willed women whose wants conflict does not in any way mean a third person is an child molesting abuser. It's very clear that the OP is at fault here. The daughter is also at fault. She is as inflexible as her mother, and just because her mother is rigid, does not make it right for the daughter to be rigid. What harm would it be to allow some time for grandmother and granddaughter to be alone together at least on occasion? One would think the daughter would understand OP would like to recreate that time she spent with her grandmother and the time when her granddaughter lived with her. I wonder if the daughter has nice memories of spending time along with her grandmother, or did the OP not facilitate that relationship? I also wonder if the daughter is worried about her mother showing favoritism among the children. The favoritism is clear (and understandable perhaps) especially the distinction between the biological granddaughter and step granddaughters, but it's hard believe the daughter would tolerate her mother favoring her daughter over the son. The daughter also has problems communicating with her mother. She didn't want her mother to come on the vacation and yet when her parents asked, she didn't say so right out then. Perhaps she was afraid of a scene. But that's not an excuse to not be clear. l Perhaps she thought it was rhetorical, it wouldn't really happen, or thought it meant it was something they should do sometime, not necessarily this time. A sort of 'let's do lunch' proposal. But again, it was her responsibility as well as OP's to make sure they were talking about the same thing. OP said she seemed initially approving of the idea then changed her mind after the tickets were purchased. Maybe she liked the idea but her fiance didn't and she encouraged the self-inviting without considering it was also her fiance's vacation and she should have spoken to him before allowing anyone else to crash the vacation, particularly since he's made it clear, they aren't his favorite people. So perhaps she initially encouraged her parents to join the vacation w/o thinking of her fiance's feelings. And then she found herself in the awkward position of having to backtrack. (btw, that the fiance may not have wanted OP and her husband on the vacation does not mean he's a child molesting abuser) So the daughter is at fault too. But the daughter isn't the one writing here, she's not the one deprived of the relationship with these children. Children who won't be children for long. OP however is the one looking for answers, and the only responsible answer is for HER to change some of the things about her that contributes to the problem. Doing the same thing she's done for the last 5+ years is not going to suddenly work. She needs to do something else, and blaming the fiance is not that something else. Looking honestly are her part in the estrangement is. A therapist would be a worthwhile investment.

This goes way beyond normal kids staying up late at night; just the sleep deprivation alone is torture & abuse. The stepson enjoys doing it, & his father enables it. "My family doctor and my psychiatrist feel that I should leave this unhealthy environment but I do love my partner and that is what keeps me here." I hate to say it, but I think you'll leave pretty soon one way or another. If you don't go under your own steam, an ambulance will take you to the hospital or the nursing home or the funeral home. & this "partner" will not come visit you; he'll throw your belongings out & forget about you (although if you're in the cemetary, he may tell people how broken-hearted he is). This is how abusers are, I've seen it before. & he *is* an abuser; even though it's the son who's mistreating you, the father is making sure that the son can keep doing it. sort of abuse at arm's length. It doesn't matter how often you catch the son & present concrete evidence to his dad, the dad will somehow sweep it under the rug & turn the tables & accuse you of causing trouble. That's called blaming the victim. Loving somebody does *not* involve taking whatever abuse they or their messed-up offspring dish out & coming back for more. Loving someone doesn't mean throwing yourself on the floor for them to wipe their feet on & pleading for them to stop; (& why would they? hey, they've got a good doormat there). Loving relationships are just that, *relationships*. Love is a 2-way street, & you are going against traffic on a 1-way street here. You've already gotten to a stop light, & your doctors have told you to take a sharp turn, but you keep thinking that the oncoming traffic will let you through. Take that turn & get off that street. Since you are seeing a doctor & a psychiatrist, I'd guess that you can afford to get a place of your own, but if you can't, call a women's shelter for guidance. Please take care of yourself & be good to yourself.