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secsteve

It Never Fails!

secsteve
9 years ago

Every year I trim our Christmas card list.

This year I really felt good as I got it down to 103 from 120. But lo and behold, what happens on New Years Eve day? Yep, you guessed it. Three people I dropped over 4 years ago reappeared. Same addresses etc. Nothing about why I hadn't heard from them in all those years.

Sigh, I give up.

Comments (15)

  • party_music50
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    haha! don't fret it -- it means they like you and thought about you. :) But wow, more than 100 cards?! that's like the old days!

    I write a personal message in cards that I send... I find that very few people do more than sign their name. Why bother? lol!

  • dees_1
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    It always happens that way!

    I'm like party_music50; each card gets a brief personal message and everything is handwritten except the return address.

    I still haven't opened the cards I received this year but there are no surprises. I get cards for a core group of current and former co-workers and a smattering of family.

    I did not send them out this year; I might just write a quick letter to some of the people who sent cards. Just so busy! I was able to send a small batch of cookies to certain special people this year. I mailed them out late but did get them out!

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  • OklaMoni
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I didn't write any since my divorce, cept for a very few special friends.

    Last two years I wrote the same amount as at this Christmas, which was NONE!

    Sure feels liberating.

    I am down to 5 cards received. Wonder how long they will continue...

    Moni

  • SunnyDJ
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    We recently lost a son and this year was not the best Christmas and all along, I kept saying I wasn't sending cards or really doing any decorating....We received cards, not as many as usual, but I did notice, the ones we got were very subdued...

  • ellendi
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    Sunny, so sorry for your loss.

    We too have noticed a decline in Christmas cards. We took off those who stopped sending to us as well as a few who I thought were only reciprocating.

    I think you should only send to those that you truly want to.

    I think people active on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram etc. feel they are already in touch and exchange best wishes on these sites.

    Steve, your amount of cards seem like too much to do at once. If you want to continue it, I would mark my calendar and start writing them in September!
    Also I would necessarily feel obligated to return a card because you now are back on a list. Again, only do what you really feel you want to.

  • joaniepoanie
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    Yes, the amount of cards dwindles each year, sadly. I got about 18 cards this year and sent around 30. I am one of those people that enjoys the proverbial Christmas letter (provided they're not braggy) and really can't understand people you only hear from at Christmas just signing their name. I WANT to hear about your life over the last year, otherwise what IS the point of the card?!

    I remember my father handwriting about 200 letters to friends/family every year. He would sit for hours at the dining room table every Sat and Sun in December. Thank heaven we have printers and copy machines today....what a timesaver and how easy it is to write one letter and include a copy in the card. I always add a few comments on the "form letter" to make it more personal.

    Seems like this is a dying tradition...such a shame.

  • ravencajun Zone 8b TX
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I quit doing cards except for the immediate family and just a few close friends.

    When I did them I would write a short letter with updates about the year and things that were significant and include it in the cards. When I quit doing cards I had several of the people send me a note in their card saying how much they always enjoyed my little letter and looked forward to it each year and were missing it. At least I knew it had been appreciated and worth the effort. But I didn't start it up again lol.

  • joyfulguy
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I'm the other way around, I guess ... as I'd told a number of more distant friends and relatives several years ago that I was giving to charities instead of giving a number of gifts and sending a substantial number of cards, even with message enclosed.

    This year, and slightly less so for a couple of years earlier, I'm expanding the list to about 50, several of them hand-delivered. Several friends have died or become (mostly mentally) disabled recently, and I'm thinking that I'm valuing my friendships more ... well, maybe not valuing them more ... but feeling a greater urgency about keeping in touch before either they or I make our final departure.

    My letter this year was much as in earlier years (in fact, for a few, I used some leftovers from a couple of years ago, making some amendments as needed ... and laughing about the amendments - they were to folks who hadn't received that one, earlier)

    I referred in the current message to the recent messages being similar ... wondered whether I was getting into a rut ... and suggesting that I'd heard that the difference between a rut and a grave is said to be mainly length.

    I usually add a personal note to each photocopied letter, and varied the messages some this year, as I can make 10 messages free here at the library (10 cents per copy, over 10) so it's easy to make variations in my script.

    As I'm inclined to question what I choose to do (including questioning my motives) ... I'm wondering a bit whether some of my motivation for sending more cards may be that I've been able to arrange my affairs so that I've been paying next to no income tax for the past few years.

    Last year when I went to the prairies to help celebrate my brother's 50th (I married him, my first wedding in my first 10 years as a minister: I'd been helping refugees resettle after the Korean War - so figured that I should participate) I wrote them a cheque, which they passed on to the cancer agency that had been helpful to my brother during prostate problems, ten years or more ago. They sent the receipt to me (as donor) and I sent it back to the cancer agency, asking them to reissue it to my brother (as recipient). He can use the deduction ... and has been sending substantial cheques to each niece and nephew for a number of years (I get just a card, with message included).

    So - life takes on different perspectives, as we age ... well, for some of us, at least.

    Hope those of you who value it all had a glorious and blessed Christmas.

    To all of you - may your New Year may bring the fulfilment of some of your dreams ... and the hatching of some worthwhile new ones.

    Including some prayers and action toward building more justice, compassion, fairness and kindness for people worldwide. This world is getting to be a rather small canoe ... and we're all in it together. If we yell at some other other darn fools to sit down and not rock the boat, or they'll tip over and maybe drown - let's remember that we're all in it, together.

    ole joyfuelled ... with a bit o' fuelling help from Christmas cake

  • Fun2BHere
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I send handwritten cards to those treasured friends that I don't have the opportunity to see during the holidays. Some send me cards, others don't.

    I keep a few New Year's cards on hand to reciprocate if I get a holday card from an unexpected sender. What cracks me up are the people who still send cards to the prior owner of my house as we've lived here 10 years. I have to wonder just how close the senders are if they don't know by now that the PO have moved.

  • secsteve
    Original Author
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    Since my hand writing is so bad, I type up a letter that I can add to or delete from for those I consider close friends.

    The rest get at least a hand written quick update. I have a couple that just sign their names.

    My least favorite ones are the picture ones. Lots of shots of what?

  • marie_ndcal
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    Last year, sent letter because DH had passed away in Aug mid Nov and did enclose obit notice in some. Got a lot of favorable cards back. This year, sent letter briefly telling what each one of the kids are doing and again got some really nice cards back. Some got dropped this year, because there were DH's co-workers and I really did not know therm. Surprise, that DH relatives have dropped my family, but I saw this coming. I do like the letters and pictures I get, and I keep them. It is fun to see how much families have changed. I have them in my Ancestry stuff and hope to get them separated and put in some sort of order/album, When I do talk to them, I try to compliment the kids on there accomplishments, and they have always thanked me for that. Maybe it is because my kids have struggled to get where they are and I am proud of them.
    And I get along with the in law relatives pretty darn good also.

  • Alice_sj
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    When that happens, I add them to the list for next year, if I feel like it. This year, I cut the list way down, and it's funny how some people who always sent us a card after receiving ours did not send one this year.

    I really dislike the photocards when I don't really know the people (acquaintances) and especially when there is nothing but the printed message. I feel like people mail those to everyone because they had to buy a package of x amount.

  • tami_ohio
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    SunnyDJ, It's good to see you here again. I am sorry to hear of the loss of your son.

    I send out about 60 cards to our family and friends each year, and organize the card exchange here. This year, I organized one for another board I am on. Between the two exchanges, I sent out an additional 40. So I am pretty close to what Steve sends each year. I don't write a letter, or most times, even a note in them. Mostly because everyone I send to has already been kept up to date on what is going on in our lives, and I am not good with words. I am doing good to sign them the way my writing is getting. I start out fairly neat, but it doesn't take long before my hand cramps and it gets progressively more squiggly. I do, however, make my own cards at Christmas. There are only two reasons why you would get a Christmas card from me that was not hand made. 1. You are a family member that I know doesn't appreciate such things, and it will very quickly hit the garbage. 2. I was unable to make any cards that year. Which is what happened in 2001 when my dad had his heart attacks, and spent a month in the hospital, coming home the Friday before Christmas. The rest of the year, if you get a card from me, it may or may not be hand made, but you are thought of with love, because not many people get cards from me the rest of the year!

    I enjoy getting some of the photo cards. Most that we get are from family out of state, and we don't get school photos from. Those are the ones that come as a package deal. Well, I can't exactly say those are the only ones that are package deals. Studio shots usually are package deals as well. We get the ones taken just before Christmas, usually are those that are purposely printed at places like Costco or Sam's and you specify how many you want printed, even with the ones with the message on them. I think I get like 3 each year. I have a cousin that was stationed in San Diego for years. Their DD is 7 months younger than my DD, and is married now living in Ohio, but their sons are teens. We only got to see them when they were here visiting family, once a year. We did get to spend a day with them when we went out by train, which was nice, and I still 9 years later, think of the boys at that age. So it's nice to get their picture every year. They were here for 2 years after cousin retired, so we got to see them a little more often, but they have just bought a house in Florida.

    Yes, social media like face book, has made it much easier to keep in contact with people. That is why I have a face book account. I can keep in contact with all of my cousins that I would only get to see at weddings, showers or funerals. Mostly funerals. But at Christmas, even tho I may wish you a Merry Christmas, or Happy New Year on face book, If I have an address for you, and I want to wish you a Merry Christmas otherwise, you will get a card from me. But don't expect it to have a note in it. I will sign it and send it. And sometimes I have been known to forget to even sign it, for which I apologize! Sometimes my holey brain gets in assembly mode and misses a step, so it's a good thing I put a return address on the envelope! And I have received that way also, so I understand.

    I do enjoy the letters that come with the cards, but we don't have that much to write about that isn't already known. There is one I might put a note in, but even that one not always.

    For me, I show how much you mean to me by sending you the hand made gift of a card.

    Tami ..... who is very ramblely today.

  • yayagal
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    So sorry to hear about your son, sunnyd, I can't begin to imagine how horrific that must feel.

  • emma
    9 years ago
    last modified: 9 years ago

    I never sent more than 30 and one year I noticed I always got mine after I sent mine out. The next year I waited until a week before Christmas and only received 3 or 4 from close family. I replied to those and sent to a couple of elderly that don't get out. I have outlived most of my family so I don't send any anymore and the only one I received was from the paper boy/man/woman? and it was unsigned. LOL

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