Oh, and one of the two confirmed what you said (Trebuchet - was it you? Maybe it was Marcolo, but it was definitely one of the knowledgeable pros on here.) He said that the cost of labor of IKEA assembly would pretty much eat up any savings, anyway.

I would assemble (though not mount them) myself, except that I really don't have the space to do it. If I had a warehouse, maybe... but a 12' wide rowhome... not so much.

You're talking to the wrong people. These are construction people. Do not rely on them for design decisions. Present your design to them for construction bids.

Snookums - it's for construction that I am submitting bids. They're looking at my plan & questioning it from the get go.

The answer is; it's my home, it fits the way I use it and I pay the note, therefore, I drive the train.

One thing I'm finding pretty consistently in my city - and I have no idea if it is universal, but it doesn't sound that way - is the high percentage (it seems almost standard) of "full service GC's." For example, I reached out to the top 3 Angie's List GC's (top, in this case, meaning many positive reviews and in my area for kitchen remodel) and EVERY SINGLE ONE, when I called specified that they were "full service, we do everything from design to demolition to installation and finishes... or some such.

One told me that they WOULD implement another designer's plans, but, when they do that, I'm no longer eligible for any of the discounts and guarantees they normally provide for cabinetry, flooring, appliances, etc.

"Designer" is a loaded word. An architect is not a builder and a builder is neither a kitchen designer nor an interior designer, etc. If the GC is making talented subs available to you that might not be a bad thing, if the GC is saying that the same person can do it all...that would not be a bad thing either but it would be very unlikely.

To me the use of the words: "no longer eligible" is intended to terrorize you into going along with them.

As to the warranties and guarantees, etc. they are coming from the mftr, not the builder. You NEED to collect the paperwork on those. Some builders throw out all of the paper that accompanies the products as they install them. You also need to understand what other information you would need to provide to the mftr in order to make a warranty claim and make sure that you get that information...

You may not want to talk to the GC again after this project ends so a warranty from the GC may not be worth much to you (especially if you had to badger him to complete the final punch list)...

Thanks, Practigal. That all makes total sense. Very good advice.

So, I went to IKEA this afternoon, hoping they'd have available a list of "recommended contractors" or some such. The guy in kitchens told me that there's ONE company that IKEA uses for all east coast installations - they don't give out lists.

"The answer is; it's my home, it fits the way I use it and I pay the note, therefore, I drive the train."

Sorry, but you'd never take that attitude with a doctor, lawyer, or even a hairstylist. Why is a professional contractor any different? You can write all the checks you please, but your job's got my name on it. As such it will be done my way.

Yes, Trebuchet. Absolutely right. So, if Angie's list isn't the place to find a decent contractor, and friend referrals aren't. *sigh* (maybe it is time to stomp my feet & take my ball & go home - for a while, anyway)

carrieb:

Try www.homeadvisor.com. You can read contractor reviews, written by customers, before you even speak to one.

Trebruchet

"Sorry, but you'd never take that attitude with a doctor, lawyer, or even a hairstylist."

They are my favorite "repeat" customers, because they know going in, there is going to be a negotiation, and I respect that they understand that it is an exercise in reciprocity. Because I negotiate with them in their practice

"Why is a professional contractor any different?"

It's the difference in the basics we have regarding customers.

Where I believe the customer is in charge of their own destiny and are free to obtain the end "they" select, I'm the mechanic who facilitates that, you have a different approach.

"carrieb"

Angies list is a pay-for-play.

Try this site, they police their members; http://www.thebluebook.com/

I've employed subs the site for over 30yrs. and have never had any unresolved complaints.

practigal

"An architect is not a builder"

While this may be your familiarity, it's incorrect.
An architect, by virtue of education satisfies the experience requirements, in most states, to qualify for licensing as an "A" and "B" contractor and it common practice for them to be in business and licensed as such.

"a builder is neither a kitchen designer nor an interior designer, etc."

This again, may be your familiarity and while it is more prevalent, there are those broad base individuals, who as a business model, have taken the time to learn a wide sphere of applications.

Sure Treb, I agree, from a technical standpoint. I would never argue with you about a proper technical way to install something if it is an accepted method of installation (of which there may be various accepted methods and which one of those you use is up to you.)

But from a Design standpoint I would not agree with the esthetic choices that most of the contractors I use would suggest or make, and one of the GC's whose work is very good, I think it ugly when they are doing a design-build. And they charge a LOT more if they are not allowed to do design-build. (Because they say if they are allowed to select the materials, fixtures and finish options to present to the client from which the client chooses it "streamlines the process"--In reality it makes them more money which is fine. But I think their esthetic choices are lacking.

And I can also design a tile layout and so could a non-designer if they so wished to spend the time, and If I want to build an entire bathroom that is designed around the dimension of full tiles (I do and I am doing this), if you say to me that you won't do that because that's now how you work and it's your name on the project, I won't hire you and your name won't be on the project. Especially if I am asking for something that can be done and I am willing to pay for it, and not asking for something that doesn't exist.

I had one of the few plaster contractors left in my city tell me that it would be cheaper to chop out all the remaining beaded corners, and replace them with "Nice Square Modern Corners", and to chop out an entire hallways worth of ornamental plaster cornice (run cornice, not anything applied) --because it would be cheaper and it would look "Nice and Clean" --he's an expert, he can do it. He just doesn't like historical plaster and would rather not. But I am sure there are people who hire him who would rather Keep the plaster and repair it but tear it out on his advice.

I hired someone else and paid over $10,000 to repair one ceiling and two beaded corners, and was more than willing to pay HIM to do it. He just didn't want to, and he tried to talk me out of it.

Welcome to the 'fun' part carrieb! As u may remember, I'm from philly too. I experienced the same thing - you contacted design to build firms which personally I found more expensive than just hiring the labor only GC. I had to have a washer and dryer in my kitchen space (we're only 2 retired old farts living here). I wanted and had designed the washer and dryer as a side-by-side. Do you know just about every single GC/contractor that came in was determined to make me go with a stackable setup. Although I had hired a GC but no $$ passed hands, he just wouldn't give it up, so I canned him since he was causing me stress in how my kitchen should be. I have a small kitchen that was going to be crammed full of stuff. The side by side setup allowed me to add a countertop and have some real useable counter space and not one of those dinky 12" counters. I developed a motto - my house, my kitchen, my money equals my way. I had one guy come in and never offered his opinions on design. That's who I hired (amongst a host of other reasons). He met my needs. Angie's list high reviews, fair pricing, only supplied the labor and was taking care of the city permits (which btw that data is now online so ur neighbors can report u to the city if you don't have permits. I provided his company name to you via a pm a few weeks ago.

On the storage of cabinets, etc. Welcome! I packed up my hobby shop in the basement and used a good portion of the basement for storage of things. I was re-using the original house baseboards and moldings, so that stuff after demo was stored under my 8ft hobby table. I wound up putting my formal dining room set in storage for 6 months to make room for a temporary kitchen and kitchen fixture stuff, etc. Had to hire pro movers and all that stuff since the furniture, even the rug was too heavy for us to move ourselves. Cha-Ching, not in original budget.

We had no heat in kitchen this past dead of winter and our BR was above kitchen in a house with no subfloors. I had blue painters tape in all the slit openings of the old wood floor. It became a game to try to keep the heat whose thermostat was in the next room from overheating rooms we weren't actively using thereby causing us unnecessarily high heating bills.

Btw, will your heating (rads? Or steam/floor?) be affected/moved? I found out on a humbug that my existing heating system would not be able to handle kick toe heaters I had planned and which every GC I met with early on knew I was installing (even the design to build places). I did not want to go back and restructure my scope with all the contravtors I had met with, so I hired a heating guy on my own. Another unexpected Cha-Ching before demo. they were great and were willing to do it in 2 steps to allow us to have heat as long as possible and not to impact the schedule. I really do need to do my angieslist reviews. Although I got references for some hires, I still checked Angie's list to see if there was anything on the company there.

Now your 'fun' will *really* begin.

Mags - I don't get messages on this site, so never got our PM - can you send that contractor's name directly to my email?

Trebuchet - I've used HomeAdvisor before (my brother, who is in construction in NYC recommended them.) I was hesitant this time since HA is paid advertising, from what I understand, but worth trying again, perhaps.

Snoobyb - I'll take a look at http://www.thebluebook.com/ . Actually, I do get overwhelmed at the differing opinions of doctors & lawyers who all know way more than I do, expect for about what I want. I have a knee injury - some docs say I need surgery, others say I do not. I've research - opinions differ. I am not medically trained. I do not know if my knee will respond better to surgery or time/exercise long term...

Palimpsest - your experience sounds like the GC's trying to talk me out of IKEA/saying they WON'T work with it/telling me that with labor, it will cost more.

Mags - fun is right! Oy. Interesting question about the heat. I don't think the heat itself should be affected. BUT, their are heat ducts, etc. in the basement just under the kitchen, and plumbing, etc will be moved all around, so I find it completely plausible that heat will be affected in the sense that when everything else is moved around, maybe they'll have to move heat things for access while they work. And, again, if you can send me that contractor info., that would be great!

" I was hesitant this time since HA is paid advertising"

So is Angie's List only worse!

Millworkman - I had no idea that Angie's list is paid. I know that with HA advertisers can specify that they're company is the ONLY one listed when a consumer does a search (I've researched using them for my own business) but at least they're free...

@carrieb, I went through a similar ordeal trying to figure out how to find someone who could renovate our small kitchen w/lots of structural constraints and a limited budget. I just wanted to add a word of warning about Angie's List - don't take reviews there as unvarnished.

We initially hired a contractor based largely on AL reviews - they were all ridiculously glowing with one exception. The firm hyped its AL gold medal status, and the one negative review made the totality seem credible. In reality, the experience was a disaster - immediately after taking our 1/3 deposit, the firm fell apart. The principals were threatening to subpoena us as part of their lawsuits against one another. And since we'd signed a contract, there was nothing we could do. In the end, after a few stressful weeks, they walked away from our project and we got our deposit back. But we had to sign an agreement promising not to criticize the contractor, and I'd seen enough crazy not to want to mess with them over an AL review. Oddly enough, the one negative review of the firm on AL described an almost identical experience from a year previous. I'll never use AL again - it's just not a reliable source of information.

We wound up using a firm that had done work for a friend/colleague who had used the firm enough that the owner had honorary uncle status in their home. It wasn't a perfect experience, but the contractor at every stage made things right and didn't try to take advantage of us. I would talk to everyone you know and work with, and see if they have someone to recommend based on a direct experience - I think it's really the best way.

In terms of weighing conflicting advice, the more time you spend here and talking to pros, the better you'll be at figuring out the fundamentals. It's hard but you really have to become the fiercest reality-based advocate for what you want, because at every point in the project, someone will tell you something is impossible or inadvisable or sub-optimal. Sometimes they're right, sometimes they're just trying to avoid hassles or do what they did on the last 6 jobs or whatever. It's hard because as a non-expert I didn't always feel capable of doing this - and also because I didn't want to offend the nice people who were doing such hard work in my home. But it's your money, and your home, and no one will care about the details as much as you do. Figure out what your non-negotiables are (your garden views?) and find someone who will help you make that happen.

If you want to be both indecisive and a control freak, be prepared to pay for the priviledge. Most contractors will just let that one go.

Carrieb either contractor could be right about Ikea: one may have a lot of experience putting it together or may sub the cabinet assembly out, while the other may not and have to spend hours figuring it all out.

This is a little different than a contractor trying to talk you out of doing something because they don't feel like doing it (not sure I would hire this contractor), or a contractor who's trying to talk you in or out of something because of their own esthetic sensibilities. (This contractor I might hire.)

Trebuchet, you seem like a conscientious and skilled contractor and you think like one. But a fair number of contractors don't have this combination and I think you assume there are more like you than not. I don't assume that most contractors have nefarious intent, which seems to be a common assumption about design or build professionals on GW, but while a contractor may be honest and conscientious, a fair number of them have a limited repertoire and try to fit every job into that mold.

Smalloldhouse - (btw, mine is a very small, very old house!) So good to know about Angie's List. Honestly, I always thought that AL was the way to go for unbiased reviews. I had no idea that's not the case. Really good, but disappointing, to know.

True about feeling like everyone knows more than I do, so, the conflicting opinions can feel really overwhelming. I'm working on learning - listening here (especially!) and to the various contractors, etc. who I've been talking to.

Hollysprings - thank you, that's very helpful.

Palimpsest - Good point about IKEA assembly, etc. It is really hard to know, sometimes, when a contractor says something to talk me into or out of something, what his real motivations are. I like to think I'm a fairly decent judge of character, but some people are better liars (or maybe even self-deceivers!) than I am able to discern.

Getting bids from contractors who are not bidding apples to apples is a frustrating exercise for all involved. You won't be getting accurate prices for the job. And the contractors will be self interpreting portions of their project.

You need to decide on a concrete single scope of work. Usually developed with a designer or architect. Not the opinion of a dozen contractors. They will interpret the job based on their past jobs, and what they are comfortable doing. Not necessarily the project that you want to see happen.

You need to unleash your inner toddler and start asking "why?"

"-One says moving the door will give me the best possible layout, another says that's an unneeded expense." ... ask the first one "what will it do for my layout that makes it worth the expense?"

"-One says that going w/ recycled paper countertops is a budget choice, another says it's really expensive (so far, my research confirms expense in my area...)"

Ask about their sources, or say "Pricing I've seen so far indicates it's pricy. What brands are you thinking of that are "budget"?

And ask them to define "budget" ... maybe his typical client thinks that 150K is mid-range

GreenDesigns - absolutely. I have a plan that I've been getting quotes for. Which has not stopped GC's from saying "why do you want to move that there? I would not use those cabinets if I were you! Oh, those are expensive countertops!" etc. I'm not asking their opinion - they're questioning my plan from the get-go.

I have a KD who is an architect (nevermind that many here believe that's a bad combo., and maybe they're right, but she was hired before I read that here & she's completed a design w/ drawings.)

So, when I hand more than one GC the plan & their immediate response is to question it, I get full of self-doubt. And I think it's pretty normal to doubt myself (and question my decisions) when it's pros who are pointing out possible problems.

So, maybe I can use a dose of confidence - but, really, isn't the humility of when you know that you know nothing about something important, too?

I am familiar with the condition. It is called analysis paralysis. You have the un-fun task of sorting out what is a real problem versus what is their personal opinion. Real problems need to be dealt with. Good luck.

"Analysis paralysis." That's me in a nutshell, pracigal. Thanks. And here, all along, I thought my diagnosis was neurosis. ;-)

I like "analysis paralysis" better - sounds infinitely more treatable.

Years ago, Our local IKEA used to provide a list of contractors. A client of mine did her kitchen selecting someone from the list. However this was long before Columbus ave store was opened and I could see centralizing that could reduce the # of install issues IKEA would need to deal with. On the other hand, using one firm for the entire east coast...I read that as someone going to come from CT to install my 20 or so cabinets. I find that a bit suspect so I'd want that info confirmed.

Angieslist. Yes the business may have to pay to play. Customer Members have to pay to play also. I've looked at AL as nothing more than a 'lead' system, a step above what was the 'yellow pages' with reviews. That shld not negate the fact that the customer needs to do their homework on who they are meeting with and intend to hire. I take company site testimonials with a grain of salt since the company controls. Sites like houzz contractor list I also take with a grain of salt. I found a contractor on there that was local and during my due diligence I discovered by pure deduction, they put their own review on houzz! AL contractors don't have that level of control. They can write a rebuttal to your review and can try to negotiate with you not to put in a review, but they cannot remove or change a customer review. I only read the member reviews, rarely if ever, the non-member reviews. The heating company I hired was listed on AL didn't have one review on there. I found him by contacting the manufacturer of the product, who in turn gave me their local contact for my area, who recommended this heating system company. He didn't even know he was on Angie's list and was offering a 10% senior disc. One of his admin staff (I think the wife) prolly put them in Angie's list. He honored everything without further conversation. From my due dilligence, he really didn't need the Angie list business; he stayed busy enuf from length of time in business and word of mouth. I never met the guy personally; we did everything via email.

Carrieb, ur email addy is not availAble to users, but I sent it thru clicking on ur name or page link and clicked on - send an email. What you can do, is do the same thing on mine and send me an email and in that email, include ur full email addy. I know my garden web PMs come to email, but it does say that I cannot respond back directly via email since the user has chosen not to share or make public or something like that. Let's try that way. However, the company name is home sweet improvement or sweet home improvement or something like that - it's a small contractor. Check out their reviews. I think u'd b happy and I could certainly vouch for them. Some specifics about them I don't think is appropriate to post on a public forum, but open to sharing in a PM.

One often takes a chance and one has to gauge using their own gut feelings. There was a highly publicized contractor showered with kudos on a site. It was old news. I was swayed by the website comments and went with them vs a contractor we met and liked (but there wasn't enough feedback outside of their own site). After I started working with the highly publicized company, I didn't find them acceptable and questioned their honorability (does that word exist). I don't hire anyone I don't feel is honorable. Never. Period. I let a public forum sway my standards. We had already been way beyond demo and invested a lot of time & some $$ on them. They stressed me out so much, I eventually canned them in the middle of the project and went back to the company my DH and I liked. I'm never too proud to say I made a mistake and explained the situation of why we didn't initally go with them. Of course DH and the GC were unhappy to say the least. The project was delayed by 2 weeks but it was such a sweet and wonderful relationship. I guess I'm saying, use the leads but still do ur homework and listen to ur gut.

Excuse any poor grammar and typos, no time right now to review.

“It's the difference in the basics we have regarding customers.
Where I believe the customer is in charge of their own destiny and are free to obtain the end "they" select, I'm the mechanic who facilitates that, you have a different approach.”

snoonyb:

We agree. I have a moral obligation to save customers from themselves. A bad haircut will grow out; a countertop will not.

palimpsest:

A good contractor knows what he doesn’t know; that’s why you rarely see me comment on the “Does this tile go with my granite?” questions. I rarely shop for clothes without my wife.

“If you want to be both indecisive and a control freak, be prepared to pay for the privilege. Most contractors will just let that one go.”

hollysprings:

Mags - so strange that my email isn't available. I checked my settings & it's on there. I've sent you a message via your profile page.

About Ikea, you can tell them that that is what you want, and you will do the assembly, and see what they say. The stumbling block may be the way they are designed to be installed, using the suspension rail for example. They may not trust that system, or having never done it, don't want to attempt it. Or perhaps they consider Ikea a threat to their usual suppliers and just don't want to support it.

Trebuchet,
I think the better you are the more insigt you may have into your own limits. In my other life I am a healthcare provider and I work in the practice of a generalist ( as a specialist) and she thinks she's very good at some procedures where she's Not.

I've interviewed contractors for projects not in my house who have been extremely critical of some of the existing work while their own work is no better or even inferior as it turns out.

Carrieb, I was under the impression you had a plan/design. To compare apples to apples, give them a copy of the detailed plan and show them the space. Here's the plan I am implementing and here's the space. Don't talk to them in terms of it being open to modification. When they start talking the stupid type design changes, just pause and say, this is the intended implementation plan. Can you meet my needs? end of conversation. They can either meet ur needs or they can't. If they can't meet ur needs, thank u for ur time and move on. Some contravtors may not want the job for whatever reason. Don't take it personal. I did *not* share my budget $$ with any contractor.

Btw, to get city certs, the design plan may be needed. The contractors I met with and ultimately the one I hired said they would use the plans to obtain permits. my design set was pretty complete.

Mags - that's just it! I do have a plan/design and I HAVE been giving it to them. You're right. When they start saying "oh, I wouldn't do..." I should just cut them off... except that I worry "what if he's right? He's the pro"...

If a pro can give a well-defined and considered Reason why they would not do something, then you could give it some consideration and decide if it's applicable to your situation and either think about changing it, or respectfully disagree.

I have had contractors say they wouldn't recommend a trash pullout and their answer was because "everybody just keeps a can under the sink" and/or "I just leave my garbage can out where I can throw stuff right in". There may be valid points with each method of trash disposal and temporary storage but not doing whatever method just because of what he has at home shouldn't be a deciding factor.

I've also had contractors say that the DW always has to go on the right because they just go there, no matter if the layout is better on the left or not. Some of them are just very rigid in their views on things, and it's reinforced by being able to do the same thing over and over and over with many clients.

So I think you may have to let them express their opinions as to why they "wouldn't do XYZ" because there may be a reasonable suggestion behind it. Or there may not, but you won't know if you cut them off in mid sentence.

I use Angie's List but it's only one of the resources I check when researching a contractor. I also check Yelp, Google, BBB and my state's contractor's board (going to add Home Advisor to the list). Oh, I also ask friends for references, too. In nearly all cases, the positive reviews I read on AL were confirmed by the other sources. However, I remember one contractor who had really good reviews on AL having stink-eye reviews everywhere else, including an F rating on BBB. The moral of the story is to never rely on just one review site.

My other bit of advice echoes what others have already stated: go with a contractor who is able to answer your questions and doesn't take a "no can do" attitude just because he doesn't want to deal with something you want.

When we started interviewing contractors to redo 2 bathrooms, among the information I gave them was that we wanted to install a cast iron tub in the boys' bathroom. Most of them said, "no problem." But one hesitated and then said, "I'll need your husband's help getting it installed." Wha?! He was a small contractor but so is the guy we hired. Our GC got the plumbing crew to help him carry the tub upstairs and install it (with nary a word of complaint from any of them. I treated them to espressos and homemade fudge. They refused a tip.).

Another contractor pooh-poohed a few of my choices during the interview, saying "I don't think that will look good," superimposing his taste over mine. I know he's a very good contractor (he remodeled a friend's kitchen and did a superb job) but I felt that I might be cowed into making design choices I didn't like so despite all the other pluses in his favor, we opted not to work with him.

The bottom line is that if you're uncomfortable during the interview process, it's not going to get better if you hire him or her.

Im not saying cut them off mid-sentence. I'm polite and professional, so in my case when they start venturing into the stackable vs side by side w/d, I'd tune out (my pause). I'd heard it from the designer too (you really can't have them in here but some things are what they are) but NO ONE knew better than us on how we used the space. My KD and I did workflow analysis and folding clothes on an island where we eat and prepare food wasn't acceptable. Personally, If I'm looking to hire a contractor, i don't feel it's appropriate for the contractor to become my designer because they feel they have some design skills. I paid a designer for their skillset. (But that could just be my project mgt mindset). Again, what's major here is how I use the space, not how they think I should use the space. Of course If a structural issue is of concern to them, yes I expect them to bring that up - that's their area of expertise.

Btw, many of us suffer from analysis paralysis. Any kitchen re-do is expensive and no homeowner wants to make what they perceive as a big mistake, look at our threads for confirmation of this. Who knows when I'll make a decision on backsplash; analysis paralysis. The tile guy knows when I'm ready, I'll be in touch and he'll help me determine how much tile I'll need, etc, and I'll wait till he can work me into his schedule. That's the way it goes.

I was very fortunate I had a good relationship with a GC who I could bounce things off of, before I got to the hiring contractor stage. I had already opened up the soffit area in question to see what the deal was with a brick wall and chimney. I could send him pics for verification and already knew which way the joists went. After the first contractor came here and brought up the load-bearing wall tactic, I kept a ladder set up - so they could climb up there themselves and look into the small hole.

I also spent an enormous amt of time here (all niter anyone?) reading and learning, so for example, when the contravtor asked me where did I want the recessed room lights, instead of pointing or saying how about here, I had already learned here that the lighting should be something like (don't quote me, it's been a long time) 24-30" from wall and decided how far away I wanted them and my lighting plan showed how far from this point another light needed to be placed, etc. I'm a visual person and every single nite after they left I was up on the ladder drawing out exact placement of things for confirmation. My old walls were marked up with black magic marker for a year before I actually got started - with notes, measurements, dependencies, etc. When i met with contractors, it was obvious I was serious.

I believe as a major participant in this project, it was just as important that I did my homework and to be prepared to be able to answer any question they asked. I quickly learned that I wasnt good at making decisions on the spot, because I didn't always consider other dependencies because I didn't want to hold them up. I learned to just say, let me think about it for a minute and would go off and check my notebook or whatever before giving a response. But again my space is small and every single 1/4" mattered. That's just normal relationship stuff and we both got to understand how the other worked.

P.s. My Dishwasher is to the left of the sink and newsflash, it works just fine.

Thanks so much again, Mags and lisa and palimpsest!

Mags - did you get my message? It was just a note with my email address. I'm also not so worried about spam, so if you didn't get it - and you're willing to send me the info., I could post it here.

I think I'm taking a step or two back, if nothing else, maybe a few breaths can help with the analysis paralysis.

I would prefer that you did not put anything I sent you in an email in a public forum.

Nothing wrong with taking a minute to step back and re-assess. My moment came when I started Nit-picking over a slight pink undertone in my gray wall paint. Even posted here. That's when I knew I fell off the edge and had to step back & gain some perspective - lol

Mags - of course, on your first point.

Yes, wait until the head stops spinning before moving forward. Never a bad idea.

Yes OP...too many opinions that can be overwhelming! What housing style and features are considered essential for your price point in one location may be different from another. People here seem to forget that certain things are very location specific, if you are building a house in a suburb in texas where everything is big you cannot follow the design layout followed in silicon valley, for example.

When I posted my floor plan I received feedback to eliminate formal living and dining areas and go with just one living and dining area. That simply wouldn't work from resale point of view where I live. I simply ignored such advise and took what worked for me.

You sometimes have to pass 10 absurd suggestions to get to the one that is truly helpful! Eventually it gets confusing and you end up feeling bad about any decision you make because there are folks who will pick apart any floor plan, any design in under 5 minutes.

Sometimes talking to friends locally or looking at homes in the neighborhood where you are building may be of more help than an online forum. So yeah, I get your feeling :)

Have you posted your plan here for GWers to review? Many folks here would be able to tell you if that doorway move is worth the effort. You'll get an even wider variety of opinions, but at least you know we're not thinking about the profit margin on your job!

Anenemity - oh yeah! I have a half a dozen or so looooong layout posts here from over the past year! Some really good ideas & suggestions - my kitchen is so small (8' x 12', with entries, exits, window, etc.) and such an awkward space that there will be many difficult compromises to make no matter the final layout.

Multiple entrances/exits in kitchen. Consider putting in a motion detector light vs having light switches at each entrance/exit. I have 3 entrances/exits in my kitchen. Absolutely one of the best kitchen decisions I made. Lol-my diva dog swears she the queen and can make a light turn on by stepping into the room. Dog wishes her food bowl can magically become filled as well. She's the queen.

I have had similar experiences with contractors.

they all want to inject their own expertise, and more often than not, they are trying to cut something they know is expensive, and claim they will save me money, but all they are doing is finding me an inferior product and skimming off the top of it while telling me they just 'saved' me money. They also know that to win the job they have to come in lower, so may suggest cutting out a door that may cost $2-3K to get right so their bid can look the lowest.

these are experienced shell game players.

I have had happier experiences doing the project management myself. it takes much much longer. But I pick and chose my own subs and if someone really sucks, they get paid for their work and I tell them not to come back.

if I ask a contractor to get rid of a bad sub, I would get a sob story about that sub's wife who has cancer... and how long the contractor has used the sub and that the sub is the highest quality ___er in the region.

Whatever. I do not trust contractors.

I have had similar experiences with homeowners.

They all want to inject their own expertise, and more often than not, they are trying to add something they know is expensive, and claim that it won’t cost me money, but all they are doing is finding an inferior product and skimming my markup off the top of it while telling me they just 'saved' me money. They also know that to get me to do the job they have to not appear crazy or greedy.

These are experienced shell game players.

I have had happier experiences working on my own home. It takes much longer. But I pick and chose my own subs and if someone really sucks, they get paid for their work and I tell them not to come back.

If I ask a homeowner to get rid of a stupid idea, I would get a story about how they’ve been on Gardenweb and are now an expert.
Whatever. I do not trust homeowners.

I have found the best way to get exactly what I want is to work on a time and materials contract where the contractors provide building materials and certain finish items that they have better access to and if there are specific items I want, I purchase those separately. It is a more expensive and more time consuming/less efficient way to complete a project. But if you want a specific, custom result the contractor, ime, is less pressured to bring a project in under a strict budget. As a client one must have a budget plus a healthy cushion plus a longer time frame.

Exactly. If you want to micromanage a job, just have the budget to do so. I've been on both sides of that coin, and there is nothing worse than having a small budget and expensive tastes. That's when you learn to DIY, not try to buy microbrewed beer on a Budweiser budget.

Just look at CEFreeman for inspiration on that front.

If you don't have the time or inclination to DIY, then reduce the project to meet the available budget. Or change your expectations of quality. Fast. Good. Cheap. Pick 2.

"I would get a story about how they’ve been on Gardenweb and are now an expert.
Whatever. I do not trust homeowners."

This is the reason I do not lift a hammer until all the decisions are made and it is clearly understood that any change will cost the customer money, yes, even reductions, because they knew and agreed to the price.

Before I lifted that hammer.

One other thing that I should say --and it is something that's helpful with any structure of contract.

I am doing two bathrooms. The tile, plumbing fixtures, the millwork, the lighting fixtures --EVERY detail--has been determined before the work starts. Because they are based upon full tile sizes and the actual dimensions of the bathroom may vary slightly and need to be tweaked as we build --this is why it's time and material.

But having every detail settled, and things bought in advance is one way to stabilize price.