Return to the Kitchens Forum | Post a Follow-Up

 o
A funny ( caution - may offend)

Posted by schoolhouse (My Page) on
Fri, Nov 2, 12 at 10:30

Not sure if moderators will object but here goes:

A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head to foot.
The doctor comes in and says, "Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now you probably won't remember, but you were in a huge pile-up on the freeway. You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and everything, however, your penis was severed in the accident and we couldn't find it."
The man groans, but the doctor goes on, "You have $9000 in insurance compensation coming and we now have the technology to build a new penis. They work great but they don't come cheap. It's roughly $1000 an inch."
The man perks up.
"So," the doctor says, "You must decide how many inches you want. But I understand that you have been married for over thirty years and this is something you should discuss with your wife. If you had a five incher before and get a nine incher now she might be a bit put out. If you had a nine incher before and you decide to only invest in a five incher now, she might be disappointed. It's important that she plays a role in helping you make a decision."
The man agrees to talk it over with his wife.
The doctor comes back the next day, "So, have you spoken with your wife?"
"Yes I have," says the man.
"And has she helped you make a decision?"
"Yes" says the man.
"What is your decision?" asks the doctor
"We're getting granite counter tops."


Follow-Up Postings:

 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

LOL!


 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

Oh. My. God.
I found my eyebrows slightly raised until that last line.

Then, I spit my lovely, hot pumpkin spice latte all over my stupid monitor. D@mn you!

OMG.
The comments running thru my head about marriage and having had enough are not appropriate.

Thank you.


 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

Very funny.


 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

Hilarious!


 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

LOL! That is hilarious! I'm glad I wasn't drinking my coffee.


 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

Thank you for that! Our remodel has hit a rough patch this week and that joke just brightened my day.


 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

Love it!!


 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

ROFLMAO!


 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

:) I assume that's tier #1 granite ?


 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

Thanks for the laugh.


 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

love it!!!! :)


 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

We need a second sticky to keep this at the top ;)


 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

LOVE IT! Along the same lines, have to admit to some self control here, refrained from comment on the 'sourcing stools' thread...


 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

oldbat.. heheehehe
I thought I was the only juvenile one here...


 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

Hahaha. That's too funny.


 o
RE: A funny ( caution - may offend)

Thanks, Schoolhouse. It's a hoot, particularly because at my age I know a number of women who might be thinking wistfully of granite. :) My self-panicker husband loved it anyway. :)

(Oldba2be, me too!)


 o Post a Follow-Up

Please Note: Only registered members are able to post messages to this forum.

    If you are a member, please log in.

    If you aren't yet a member, join now!


Return to the Kitchens Forum

Information about Posting

  • You must be logged in to post a message. Once you are logged in, a posting window will appear at the bottom of the messages. If you are not a member, please register for an account.
  • Posting is a two-step process. Once you have composed your message, you will be taken to the preview page. You will then have a chance to review your post, make changes and upload photos.
  • After posting your message, you may need to refresh the forum page in order to see it.
  • Before posting copyrighted material, please read about Copyright and Fair Use.
  • We have a strict no-advertising policy!
  • If you would like to practice posting or uploading photos, please visit our Test forum.
  • If you need assistance, please Contact Us and we will be happy to help.


Learn more about in-text links on this page here