Well, if someone is looking for a specific person, it would be much more polite, efficient, and private to just send them an email through GW. If the person doesn't have their email turned on, one would assume that they aren't open to private communications.

Posting callouts to specific members is rather rude to everyone else, isn't it? It's like being a a dinner party where everyone is having polite conversation and two folks are leaned over whispering to each other in public. If the topic would benefit a number of people, then it should be posted to everyone. If it's private enough communication to a specific person, then it should be private, not public.

GreenDesigns, Bee is talking about posts that are specifically looking for the owner of a kitchen with a feature that the poster is interested in knowing more about. I've seen this several times, "Calling X, I'd like to know more about your ____________ (enter specific kitchen feature here)." That's not rude, IMO, and keeping it public helps others here learn as well (there are many who lurk). Those types of threads have more than once gotten responses from others with the same or similar features, unbeknownst or forgotten by the OP. Without the original call-out - if the conversation was conducted privately - they would not have posted and the OP would have remained ignorant of their valuable input.

Bee, good point!

No, I don't think it's rude either. But maybe the responsibility lies on the OP to keep bumping the post up until the person being called out responds.

I think all posts benefit us readers. I know I read a lot of posts that don't seem to apply to me, but I ultimately end up learning something from them.

If someone is seeking those with experience with Y widgets, then the post should be titled," Looking for Y widget owners, especially KitchenKitchen and GreenDesigns". If they post "Looking for KitchenKitchen", then the title indicates it's a private topic posted in public forum and will be much less viewed and responded to than one with a more general title. The title indicates that other members are not welcome to respond, and such singleing out is rude, IMHO. If the topic is geneal enough to be posted in a forum, then it's general enough to create a more useful title for the post. If it's something more personal, like "Need reccomendations for a a hotel in your city", then that's a totally private communication that doesn't belong on the forum at all.

I'm sorry, but I view post titles singling one person out as the equivalent to passing notes back and forth in junior high. If the communication can't wait until after class, then you should excuse yourself. If the note is about something like planning the prom, then everyone should be taking part.

This is all IMHO though, and it's not like I rule here, or anyone has to take any notice of what I say, but since the topic of shout outs came up, I thought I would express another viewpoint. I'll continue to ignore posts directly calling one member's name as I've normally done, but I do think that I have a point that could clarify communications here.

Thanks Bee for clearing this up. I think in the past I thought I was doing the poster a favor by responding thinking this keeps the post current. It makes sense now to me that if you leave it, it stays on top.
I see nothng wrong with the "shout outs". This is what this forum is about. Not only general info, questions etc., but
also when you want to know something specific from a specific person.

greendesigns, I totally understand the private message theory. Unfortunately some people don't have that on, and some people find it necessary to eventually turn it off. Mine is now off. I have reasons. There are a lot of people out there lurking on GW, and only send pm's. That's all I"m saying.

And yes, this is not about "Calling GW Member, how is your dh doing after surgery", I'm talking about "GWMember tell me about _______ in your kitchen". And I didn't mean that other members shouldn't be involved in the conversation. I just wanted to remind people that if you post on a thread, it will start to drop. You need to give the person being called a chance to respond.

Again, I"m not talking about having a private conversation with another member on the forum. Rather, a public conversation with another member. Sort of like having the teacher read the note out loud that was passed in gym class.

Someone once called me since my e-mail was turned off. I never saw that option when I signed up, and have not succeeded in getting it turned on due to the ancient software running this forum. So, I'm open to private conversations but don't have the option to have them.

I also think it's weird when someone posts about an unusual problem and the first reply is something unrelated and the thread immediately sinks out of sight.

FWIW,

As far as I know unresponded-to threads don't stay at the top indefinitely, just longer. If I see a post that hasn't gotten replies start to slip down, I will sometimes add a comment to bump it. Unfortunately once a topic has gotten even a single reply, it will fall again pretty rapidly w/o additional comments.

Since we've progressed beyond the strict limit of threads that used to apply to this busy forum, I am not troubled by bumping - even by the orginal poster. Sometimes it's very helpful.

L.

I think liri is right -- I read somewhere on GW that a thread stays, unanswered, at the top for three hours or until it's responded to, whichever comes first. So after three hours it starts siiiiinking anyway.

I think it's a good point that the OP should just keep bumping the message if it's that important.

GD, I see your point about the whispering aspect. But it's not as if we can't *hear* what's being whispered about, so to speak. I do understand your point and don't think it's completely wrong, just maybe a little overstated? "Rude" perhaps has a stronger connotation than you might even mean? Sorry, not trying to put words (or take them away) in your mouth. But at the end of the day, as you say, we can all just ignore the posts that don't interest us. And I think it's right, there are many lurkers who benefit. This is actually a way to be (or at least an attempt to be) inclusive, not exclusive, which is the point of whispering.

I agree with Bee's point, but will amend it. If the shout out is about where did you get your stools, or can I see the close-up of your backsplash, and someone else knows where to get the stools, or can link a thread with the backsplash detail, I think it's perfectly okay to do so. The shoutee may be unavailable and by the time the thread starts sinking the person with the answer might also be unavailable.

I use the same philosophy with most new threads I look at: If I have something tangential to say, I'll try to wait until someone else has replied first, so that I'm bumping up instead of starting the sinking.

Oh for godness sakes, why in the WORLD would anyone be "offended" by a post that calls out a specific person??? If that offends you, you have much bigger issues. It is NOT like "passing notes in school." Anyone and everyone can click on the post and see what is being asked. It is just an easy way to ask a specific person a question.

I agree with bee -- but I also agree with another poster that I'm not sure it will stay at the top forever just because it is unanswered.

Oh, my. I just wanted people who didn't know that if you answer a thread it will start to slip. If you don't, then it will hang out up near the top for a little while.

On Home Decorating maybe there is another type of time limit. If you recall, I posted about a "Recycle Sale" a few weeks ago on both forums. No one responded to it on the HD forum and it stayed up there for days. That is what I'm talking about. Once it gets activity it falls.

It really was a general "tip" to let people know that responding to a thread will certainly make it fall.

We often like to share things with each other that don't necessarily need any comment, such as "Kohler is giving away a Super-duper pull down fancy faucet with a purchase of any other faucet". (you know what I mean). In this case you would be helping out your fellow forum members by letting them know about this fantastic offer, but if someone chimed in with a "I've always wanted one of those", then the post drops and others can't see it. Yes, eventually it falls, but this just might help out someone else.

ok?

Bee...Don't worry about it, you were just trying to be helpful.

Bee- I completely agree with you...and it's amazing how many people will respond, who are not the person the OP is asking about. Can you post this on a couple of other forums, too :)

Oh, and for anyone who thinks this is not a good idea...I see people asking Boxerpups for help with pictures all the time. If these messages were always sent as e-mails, we would all miss out on all those beautiful pictures!

Thanks Bee. I actually didn't know quite the ends and outs of this so I appreciate you pointing it out. Makes good sense to me!

pup

the number of hours it takes before a new post begins dropping is a different number in each forum.

this is programmable.

moderators make changes from time to time.

they also have the option to trigger a specific thread to "drop" at any time.

my writing this out is to provide fact, f.y.i., not as a desire to influence a consensus or decision.

--

i don't mind it when a thread gets responded to, by anyone.

the thread can pop up again later. We all know how to post to a thread.

they also have the option to trigger a specific thread to "drop" at any time

You would think. I've seen many threads ... dead threads ... that no one can post to and the moderators remain oblivious to even after repeated email messages. Threads that sit at the top of forums for months.

At one time, maybe it was under Spike's rule ... shout outs were strictly forbidden. Of course back then there were only a few pages for each forum.

If a thread sits, dead, can't you just respond to it and sink it away?

Just wondering.

Bee -- I think people are just bored (holiday) and wanting to respond! I don't think there's real controversy here or anger. Just a desire to interact... :) And share a little knowledge (of course).

No, when it's dead a Whoops! message appears and doesn't allow further posting.

Here is a link that might be useful: Whoops! thread on Suggestions forum

I think it is fine to call someone out, even flattering because it is usually because the poster think the person has an awesome kitchen or great skills. Beekeeperswife has a good point, and many may not know responding makes a post decend.

In the "old days", there used to be a written rule prohibiting directing messages at individual posters. It appears to be gone now, so I guess it is fair game.

Also, "bumping" used to be prohibited as well.

Yup, bumping was a big no-no back then.

I may be guilty as one of the people others call out.

"Hey Boxerpups can you help me find ___________."

No, I am not the popular girl passing notes. Hardly!
I have my e-mail turned off and I believe people try to
find me by posting a thread with the title Boxerpups.
Many folks here know I love kitchens and have a plethora
of pics. And so when someone needs to find me on GW they
do it this way. I am thankful that GW offers the option
not to show e-mail, facebook, work home addresses.. etc.
I need privacy so this works for me.

The bottom line is Bee is being kind.
Thank you Bee.
~boxerpups

I always thought that if a posting was responded to, it would stay near the top... but lately I have not even been able to find my own posting -- I received several responses via email, but went on here looking to see them in one place, and could not find them - even after using the search. Do they "go away" sometimes or am I just challenged?

Mabies, I think they sink fassst!

Try this. Google:

site:ths.gardenweb.com mabies

You can add a search term from the thread in question, an unusual word you or another used perhaps.

Mabies, it goes like this:

1) post a message
2) message is on top of page
3) someone posts a reply to another message
4) other message goes to the top of messages with replies but under your new message (1)
5) repeat (3) and (4)
6)A -- your message gets a reply and is added to the top of the list of messages with replies underneath the messages that don't have replies.

6)B -- your message doesn't get a reply, but hits the time set for it to start sinking and messages with new replies start getting put on top of your message (1) that has no reply. It sinks with the rest.

Sinking is really just other messages having more recent replies. It's not how many replies that keep it near the top, but how recently.

Sometimes messages get one reply in the morning and one in the evening, and that's enough to keep them in the top half of the first page for days. Sometimes a message will get 25 replies in one hour then sink fast to the second page before the OP even sees the replies.

If I haven't been on GW for awhile I just search my own name to find threads that I've either participated in or threads that I've been mentioned in.