I think that the Martha Stewart Living by Corian at the Home Depot would be well within the cottage design aesthetic. I don't know how cheap it is, but it has nice soft neutral colors that look more natural to me than other solid surfaces. I particularly like the sea salt and shoreline colors.

Sea Salt:
{{gwi:1889032}}

Shoreline:
{{gwi:1889033}}

We considered doing MSL cabinets (mostly because of great looking ad photos, shameful I know) but we decided against it after reading many concerns about the quality of the cabinets. The countertops are made by DuPont though and are just color variations of their main product, so quality should be just fine.

Are you the type who keeps a super tidy, ready-for-photo-shoot staged style kitchen? Or do you often have things on your counters? Vintage bread box, bowls of fruit, coffee pot, etc.? Counters make or break a nw empty kitchen but they recede a bit in a used one.

You can make it work. (But gray with white solid surface would be so totally extremely cottagey! I'd try for this option. If you two can negotiate to this, I think you will be happy. White solid surface looks less plasticky, and it really is actually a nice kitchen surface.)

{{gwi:1889034}}

Sorry. I don't see how that fits "cottage kitchen." I do see how it fits "2004 developer's flip."

I've seen this on the forum before, though your case isn't the worst by far. Husband as CEO. The low-level admin, er, wife, does all the research and planning, and humbly presents her ideas to her C-suite husband, preferably in PowerPoint. From his lofty position of authority, he may generously deign to approve her choices, after peppering her with questions as if she were facing the board of directors, or, more likely, go off in another direction at a whim and quickly dispense his commands. The humble wife slinks off to try some way to make his idea work.

Personally, I'd nip this in the bud. Otherwise you will find your goals overriden by every contractor, salesperson or web article that comes into contact with your husband, especially during the fast-paced decisionmaking phase of the process.

What you should do, first, is come to agreement on the "cottage kitchen" concept. Get him to agree with it, or else come up with a compromise you both like, if he doesn't cotton to the look. Then, when he comes to you with a different countertop, make it his job to show how it fits the concept. If he can't, he doesn't win.

>I don't know how cheap it is

Think E group, i.e. as spendy as it gets.

I think Brickton is on to something...those pics are definitely cottage-y and really attractive. I do not care for the sanded mocha and I don't think it fits into the cottage theme at all. What if you showed DH some of your inspiration pics and find one that he likes? Then, you could just try to replicate it?

Those surfaces Brickton mentioned are really nice. I did a guick google search and saw one very pretty cottage kitchen using the sea salt, which reads as white in the photo. So I think you could make it work with a white solid surface, if that's in your price range.

I agree with briana. Start collecting inspiration pictures. I am not to keen on that white surface. Even if you are good about cleaning, it will show every crumb and speck. Grrr, I hate when the DH's get so involved. Let him pick something else! I like your idea for the beadboard. It can go with many counters, but solid white? It will look like a hospital IMHO. Good luck. We will all be eagerly watching.

I am no expert on solid surface or cottage style, but I was watching "Sarah's Summer House" the other day where she styles her "cottage kitchen". She uses a lot of soft colors, worn/lived in finishes, and very little contrast to achieve her cottage kitchen.

"learns from a salesperson that contrast is better, so "we" settle on the possibility of Staron Sanded Mocha, since I don't hate it"

Do not settle and do not rely on sales people for design decisions. I love contrast, but your sales person is an idiot if he/she says "contrast is better". Better than what? Contrast is a design decision and it really depends on what style, look, design you are going for as to whether or not you should have contrast. Personally, I love contrast but when I think of "cottage" style, I certainly do not think of sharply contrasting colors.

What color(s) do you like/want? If your husband liked white, do you? I think white countertops and white or cream cabinets would be lovely in a cottage kitchen. I also think cream or pale gray, blue, beige, green could also just as easily work. Find out what you like, what inspires you, and then go from there.

Simple to decide. Who spends more time in the kitchen? That's the person who makes the final decision. Period.

My DH can pick countertops when it's his kitchen....but in this case, it's MY kitchen, as I'm the cook, dishwasher, cleaner, and shopper. I ask if he agrees with me, but mine is the final decision.

I have Rain Cloud by Corian and it has a white-ish marble-ish pattern to it. There are just enough flecks and movement to hide crumbs in the short term. It does not show every drop of water either. It is smooth to the touch and has a very mellow vibe. I think it would look very "cottage"y.

BTW - prickly pear - that bs is to die for!

I was looking through an older magazine and saw a very cute, cottage style kitchen that had beadboard on the cabinet doors and used laminate countertops that looked like butcher block. Would that be a good compromise for you and your DH?

Here are a couple of pictures...

{{gwi:1889036}}

{{gwi:1889037}}

I would go for
white or close-to-white
beadboard backsplash
cabinets
countertop
and some butcherblock countertop
and wood or brick floors.

The first photo of Sarah's kitchen showed that the counter CAN be a solid white or whitish color. The paint on your walls is exactly that and you don't complain about that.

For what it's worth, I've already started painting the upper cabinets white, thinking low contrast with gray counters...before the re-laminating plan fell through & DH started having opinions. Easy enough to take the paint another direction, though, so long as it's not too out there for DH. We'll see.

Thanks you guys!! Lots to think about so far. I'll write a better post when I'm not hurrying on lunch break.

"He thinks he wants white, then learns from a salesperson that contrast is better, so "we" settle on the possibility of Staron Sanded Mocha,"

If the sales people/designers at Home Depot only had any idea of the stress these whimsical comments can cause...Some guys/men/husbands just LOVE Home Depot and Lowes....Love wandering the aisles and chatting with the "experts" at these stores. Can you see how one little off-the-cuff comment caused you sooooo much stress and what truly sounds like disappointment?

For some it just comes easy - they know what they want, how to design, coordinate, dream and then implement. Not me....I have no confidence and envy those who do.

If it were me, I would go back to the laminate OR I would go all the way to granite. Either keep it simple and stay in budget, OR go ALL-IN with real soapstone or granite.

Do a little more researched, and DON'T be rushed!

I liked your laminate choices.

Tracy M

I actually left HD last night feeling optimistic. The 1st salesperson was an annoying know-it-all, and the 2nd was more helpful but still more focused on getting us fast numbers to compare laminate vs solid-surface than on helping fulfill a design dream. No one asked any questions about use of counters or style or anything, and it was easy to lose focus. Plus, DH confessed he's been thinking we should do hardwood or something similar as flooring...oh the time & money I could have saved in paint samples if only he'd told me that sooner! The fact that we were finally trying to talk about it together felt like progress.

However, Tracy, you correctly read my disappointment. I was in a funk all day, mourning the loss of the kitchen I thought was so close. Marcolo's assessment was somewhat insulting, but close to home. Especially the indictment of the Sanded Mocha as "2004 Developer's flip". Dated, cheap & contractor-style all in one. Exactly the horror we're trying to avoid here, right? A budget shouldn't have to mean settling for mismatched & ugly. I'd rather live with purple.

It comes down largely to a communication problem; or too much HGTV, since I end up envying those couples (many newlyweds, like us!) who tackle home improvement projects together. I think I'm pretty low maintenance, but I like to put my stamp on my home and make the best of what I have...like most women (& some men). DH does the same, but on the outside rather than the inside. If only he could apply his great sense of landscape, wardrobe & auto style to home interior...but not so much, IMHO. He's neater than I am (clear counters vs cluttered) but less concerned with style.

However, DH lived here for nearly 10 years before we married & I invaded his space, so things I see as the PO's irritating bad taste, he sees as functional and fine. He'll say he doesn't care about these things, so I start making a plan and running with it...and then suddenly he cares.

I think I've tried to get him to look at pictures, but perhaps not hard enough. What can I say...it's work getting someone else to share decisions, and I'd rather just do it on my own, but clearly that's causing problems, too, since it means no shared vision. And I do want him to feel at home and be happy with the final result, hence the trying to see if I could make it work. If who cooks more counts, I'd say I should have more input (as well as caring more), but who knows if he'd agree.

Okay, I have my assignment! And I still think laminate is the better (more attractive and less expensive) option, so I won't give up yet on winning him over. If he's set on solid-surface, though, he may have to give in on cabinet color...or help me create a new, non-cottage vision.

Thanks so much for the support you guys! It's so nice to have somewhere to connect with other TKOs who don't think I'm a fruitcake for caring.

Ah, I see your problem now. Sorry, I did not understand you had moved into his home. Yes, that's a touchy issue, then. One of the most difficult things, if not THE most difficult, is setting the ground rules for disagreements.

Everybody learns a certain style of arguing from their family, but becoming a couple means you have to meld different communication styles - never easy, and certainly not in remodeling. At some point, one of you is just going to have to trust the other's taste.

Good luck! Hope everything goes well.

LOL! My son-in-law suddenly developed a pre-wedding interest in china patterns a few years ago. I couldn't believe he actually cared.

As for laminate surfaces: would it help to tell him how really well the stuff holds up? We moved into this house 37 years ago. The original countertops, which are still in place, are white laminate. This includes a large peninsula. Because this is a small house (1500 sq. ft), that peninsula gets used for some of everything. It currently has a painting project on it which will make way for a sewing project shortly. The white is still really white and the 2 or 3 dings (peninsula + counters) are recent acquisitions. It still looks respectable even though it is definitely time to update. If your budget is tight, laminate should be a serious contender. Even if your budget isn't too tight, laminate should still be a contender.

P.S. Glad the person at HD likes the sanded mocha. Maybe he or she would like to install it at his/her house. Lesson for happier marriage: listen to him, nod and smile, maybe let some time pass, then say, "I thought about what you said, but I still have a vision of _________." It's the give and take that's important.

Jessica, don't know if you're recently married or not, but here's the best marital decision-making advice I can give anyone. When you are making a decision together and you don't agree, don't immediately go for a compromise. Ask the question, "Who cares most?" If one person cares way more about the decision than the other, let that person have his/her way.

For example, I care about the interior of our house a lot. My husband not so much. So I make those choices. I'll run it by him to see if he hates it, but he generally defers to me. He cares way more about cars than I do, so he picks out our vehicles. Again, he wouldn't buy something that I would be mortified to drive, but it's generally his call. The only time we compromise is when our level of interest/emotional attachment to a decision is roughly equal.

If you always compromise, neither of you ever get what you want.

Mind you, this only works if each of you is willing to cede certain territory to the other. I have friends whose husbands want to be involved in picking out dishes, bedding, kids' clothes, etc. It sounds horrible.

You've been dreaming of this kitchen for a long time. You're emotionally invested. He has shown mild interest up to now. Seems like it ought to be your call. He can have landscaping.

Okay, here's the problem. He's used to seeing it this way. If it was a new house for both of you, I'll bet he'd be as excited to change the kitchen as you are.

Try explaining to him what you just told us. He's got great taste/style when it comes to outside, auto and clothes, but you need a 'family' style kitchen now...not a bachelor's kitchen. Whether you're planning to have kids or not, a family friendly, cottage style kitchen is what you want.

Let him see how important this is to YOU and that if he wants to spend the time looking through photos (really looking) doing the research and shopping...then obviously, you value his input. If not, stand back and prepare to be impressed...with YOUR finished (and lovely) cottage kitchen :)

It seems a fairly common problem that the invested researcher in any home project does a lot of work and finds if they present all possible options to the less invested partner, that partner often picks something that the invested researcher does not like. For me (the invested researcher in my household), I decide what I want. I then take several options that would make me extremely happy and I share them with my partner to get his opinion. Sometimes he doesn't care. Other times he will veto certain items that he hates. And sometimes he'll find something he really loves. Whenever I have taken him to a showroom to actually pick through the multitude of options, especially when I have already narrowed it down to a select few, it backfires on me. If I have something I absolutely must have, then I tell him that and then verify that he doesn't hate it. Since I am the one doing all of the work (actually in my case: all the financing, research work, and DIY work), he realizes that it is important to me that I end up with something I love. And sometimes, when I stop and really listen to his ideas and suggestions, I realize that he's very smart and has great ideas and suggestions and we end up with a better product.

I guess in summary, I suggest that you try some of the techniques that others have suggested here. 1) Determine exactly what you want: what elements are a definite must and what are elements you would like as a shared decision. 2) Let your husband know what is very important to you and why. 3) Reassure your husband that you realize he has good taste/ideas/etc but that X is your goal (in this case: cottage kitchen) and why and that you would like his help to get there. 4) If you find contention when you are both presented with all of the options, then being the invested researcher / primary user of the space, provide a limited set of options for him to choose from. 5) Do your research and avoid allowing off-hand remarks or uninformed opinions to sway your or your partners opinion.

You're certainly not alone. And it sounds like we all think your idea of a cottage kitchen sounds lovely. Solid surface, laminate, granite, soapstone, butcherblock could all work wonderfully for a cottage kitchen. The important thing is to find a product that suits your needs (financially and functionally) and meets your wants. Best of luck!

I always narrow down my selections to 2 or 3, all of which I like and can live with, and then ask DH which of those he likes. Like most of the TKOs here, I have already done the research and legwork and put the thought into narrowing it down to those options.

For what it's worth, I have NO confidence in the recommendations of most of the employees at Home Depot or Lowes. I recently needed to get a piece of plywood cut at our local Lowe's but couldn't because an employee had cut through the saw's power cord with the saw. Highly trained professionals they are not.

Wow, I might have to bookmark this thread to re-read just for periodic marriage advice! ;)

Y'all are never going to believe this. I texted DH yesterday morning to tell him I can live with purple (carpet & countertops) if he can live with white cabinets (since they're in progress), but that if we're going to spend money, we need to look over pictures and agree on a plan. No response since his phone was dead. So by that evening I had my inspiration pics ready and tried to show him, but he preferred to play games on his phone and said they all look like my mother's kitchen (white cabinets, I guess?). He did seem to like one with green cabinets and a white counter, but I couldn't get any specifics out of him (and since we'll likely sell in a few years, green cabinet are probably out). Then I showed him the white kitchens with gray counters and asked what he thought and could he live with that...and he said, "isn't that what we're doing?" as if the whole HD scene hadn't taken place. He finally 'fessed up that he thinks the solid surface looks higher end than laminate, but clearly he doesn't want to be involved in the research end of the decision making process. Craziness. It reminds me of planning our wedding last year; you'd think I'd learn not to go into a total tailspin over his whims. His attention span on home decor is about like mine on cars...I care, but briefly and not enough to learn much. Generally I'd say our relationship works more like beagled's...one cares, the other doesn't, so there aren't too many times when compromise is mandatory. We're still learning, though, and sometimes we think we care about something we really don't (does that make sense? based on being used to doing things our own way).

"For what it's worth, I have NO confidence in the recommendations of most of the employees at Home Depot or Lowes. I recently needed to get a piece of plywood cut at our local Lowe's but couldn't because an employee had cut through the saw's power cord with the saw. Highly trained professionals they are not."

Oh this cracked me up...actually, both DH & myself work in hardware, so I have a pretty good idea of what I can and can't expect help on and from who (well, at my store...his has so much turn-over it's hard to keep track). However, I was admittedly unprepared for the countertop discussion. Any other time I've looked the department has been empty, and here there had to be a full-blown sales pitch when DH was along and in planning mode.

The countertop sale goes from June 23-July 10, so I think I'll check out a few more options to see if there's something cottagey & relatively inexpensive that might fit his idea of higher end. I also need to remind him of my parents' beveled FX180 laminate and see what he thinks. The man does have good taste, just not the patience/interest to put together a cohesive decor plan.

Actually, I probably overwhelmed him last night, too (and maybe I wanted to), so it might help to present just a few looks and see what he thinks.

Honestly, right now I'm a little overwhelmed myself. We just had the walls in the kitchen/living area textured, and it's a little more like heavy orange-peel than I was expecting. I love my contractor, but I should have asked more questions. Pretty sure it's a detail I won't care about much later, but right now it's a bit of a let-down. Plus, I've been planning around the purple carpet. If DH is now open to getting wood-laminate or something, I'm wondering if gray counters will still be the best choice. Maybe the Sally Wheat gray & white is the way to go...but I already have the white paint. GAH!!