Hi special, I am in the same situation. The only thing I kept from my former kitchen is the 4.75" window/door casings/trim, since it is throughout the house. Although for the same reason. I agreed to reducing window trim to 2.5", I think it's going to look stupid with the rest of the room's original trim.

I came across this here. Sorry I don't remember whose kitchen this is, forgive me for not being able to give appropriate credit for the brilliant idea. I think it may be a perfect solution for me. I can't handle making another decision, so backsplash not part of this phase. This idea will definitely my impact backsplash choice. Maybe it can help you

It looks to me like in the photo of the kitchen you posted, the window casing ends right next to the crown (top left).

[Traditional Kitchen[(https://www.houzz.com/photos/traditional-kitchen-ideas-phbr1-bp~t_709~s_2107) by San Antonio Kitchen & Bath Designers BRADSHAW DESIGNS LLC

I personally think it looks very nice as it is.

How do you have casing that is wider than the windowsill? The casing sits on the sill so you couldn't go wider than that anyway as far as I know.

Am I right on this, anyone?

That was my understanding, too, deedles. Maybe the "padding out" that the OP's contractor is recommending will allow for the 3 1/2 inch casing that the OP wants ... ? In any case, I don't think I'd want to extend the casing out further than the windowsill.

Thanks for the replies so far. The window sill would be replaced if we go with the wider casing and may need to be replaced if we go with the narrow too. The padding out would put an inch piece of wood on all sides of the insides of the window (but not cover the glass), basically giving a wider surface onto which to attach the casing. There is just enough room for the 2 1/4 inch trim to fit and clear the corner of the crown. We mounted the crown so the top of the it would line up with the top of the casing.

Here is another angle of the other kitchen. To me it looks like they took the wide casing all the way up to the ceiling and that the top of the crown covers a little corner of it.

[Traditional Kitchen[(https://www.houzz.com/photos/traditional-kitchen-ideas-phbr1-bp~t_709~s_2107) by San Antonio Kitchen & Bath Designers BRADSHAW DESIGNS LLC

Specialk, how much of a reveal will that leave around your windows? Looking at your picture, it looks like adding that padding will pretty much take away all of your existing reveal. My concern would be that in adding the padding and the wider casings would make everything look too cramped around the window itself. Have you tried doing a mock-up with a piece of trim and casing to see how it looks?

I agree with jellytoast. As a matter of fact, I just yesterday had my DH tear out drywall and plaster around our new kitchen window as the guy hadn't done a very good job and it had almost totally obliterated our frame reveal on the window. Forget that, you'll hate it.

Do exactly what they did in that last pic you posted... run your nice flat trim (have them plane it down so it's not as thick, then you won't have to cut out so much cab molding) right smack up to the cabs and ceiling. Then accept how wide the molding can be if you do that because sometime we can't have it all. I kept my cabs back to 33" wide so I could have some relief around the window... I didn't want this pinch point. Course, my cabs are smaller than I'd prefer but oh well...

I agree with jelly and deedles,... lengthen the stool, (often mistakingly called sill, which is exterior, stool is interior)
and go with a nice wide flat casing that butts the cabinets and ceiling. Then butt the cabinet crown into that.

" ... sometime we can't have it all"

Boy, ain't that the truth! I had to compromise all over the place in my kitchen, which often included giving up something I had my heart set on in order to get something more functional.

Thanks for the additional feedback! What type of trim do you think would look good? I am thinking something simple but I can't find a photo of the profile I have in mind anywhere. Also, I can't find any style I like at Home Depot, Lowes, 84 Lumber, etc. Plus the width would need to be 4.5 inches and there doesn't seem to be much available in that size.