First I am sorry this happened to you. I know it is a treasure to find someone that you trust and does good work. You can't blame him for playing both ends, he has a family to support. My first thoughts - will he discuss/recommend people that worked for him? If they were employed by him for any length of time he must have felt they did good work. (possibly even worked on other projects in your home. You can still use his subs i.e. electrician, plumber.

Thanks for responding.

I know it sounds like I am crying with a loaf of bread under my arm but a courtesy heads up call would have been appreciated. Had I waited even longer to call I still would't know.

Believe it or not he did all the work himself with
occasional help from his son and SIL. I was told no one does work like him.He started a job and stayed all day to completion.That answer doesn't get me anywhere.

The guy who did my moms kitchen was a one man show and got occasional help when needed. We got him to help us a few days just hanging the cabinets as we didn't want it to take months DIY.

Good luck - that really sucks. Can you do any of this DIY?

Some people, if your old stuff is decent will remove for free if you sell/give away on Craig's list or other groups?

Windows and doors aren't that hard to do if you are just replacing and not doing an addition. We did ours DIY and they have been the easiest task so far. We loved window installing.

Destruction is our highpoint in the DIY arena. As far as construction, we are sadly challenged. Thanks for the help.

I can totally understand your disappointment and frustration. But I wouldn't call your contractor disreputable.

The man is entitled to do what is best for him and his family. Maybe he made the final decision over the holidays, after some time for reflection.

Not all contractors are "pirahanas". I know 'cause my DH used to be one, too. It's a hard, stressful business. My DH got out too and is much happier for it.

Sounds like you have had a good relationship with this man for seven years. Surely you want the best for him?

I agree a call to you would have been in order but while you're obviously disappointed I think you may be overreacting. Things happen - people have accidents, people have illnesses, people move, people change careers. Calling his reasons inane are probably unfair to him.

Supposing you had just lost your job and could no longer afford to remodel. Would you have any qualms about backing out - particularly since no money had changed hands and no contract was signed.

It's time to regroup and look for other alternatives. Good luck!

If you can demo, maybe your best bet would be to sub it out yourself to get the project moving. I love to demo too - it's the putting it back together that isn't as much fun. My husband teases me, I'm good at ripping it all apart, and leaving the rest for him.

That really stinks! What a major disappointment!

However, you have dried your tears, written down your frustrations to share with the GW community and now it's time to move forward! My DH always says "Every knock, a boost!" Roughly translates to the cloud's silver lining, etc.

Where are you, so people can give you referrals to other excellent GC's who will be more professional, and who will do an even better job for you than the guy who let you down would have?!?

I'd recommend my own great GC - we are very happy so far! I also could pass on a recommendation for a smaller guy who turned our job down b/c it was too big for him. He has done excellent work for several friends of mine (and he's handsome, to boot!)

There are many more out there with their own recommendations, but we don't know what area you live in.

Best wishes to you! Better that he left you now than 80o% into the job! (Which happened to my best friend's friends in Montclair NJ! Then they started to get sued by the subs, whose work they had already paid the GC for! Pella took them to court - what a nightmare!)

... but a courtesy heads up call would have been appreciated.

I absolutely agree with that. Now, let me show you the OTHER side of this coin. Over at John Bridge's forum in the Pro's Hangout, we've been discussing this very subject, but the other way around:

Here is a link that might be useful: Drive By Tile Estimates

Thanks to all who responded with kind words of help or tongue lashings.

Inane reasons do not include health or family.We all have reasons for doing what we do unfortunately we don't always carry them out in a way that suits everyone.

I am a believer in everything happens for a reason but because the event is still fresh I haven't figured out the reason as of yet.

pcjs...good ideas. Thanks.

smarge...You're right.My DH and I were discussing that fact that at least he didn't start.Things could always be worse,but it still stings.Thanks for your ideas. I am in the LI area.How horrible for your friend.I hope they are at peace with the situation now.

bill vincent...My contractor did site this very reason the lack of jobs.Thanks for the agreement and insight.

Time to move on.A new contractor is coming next week to assess the situation.

Having a successful construction job starts with detailed plans and specifications complemented by an explicit written contract that is equitable to both parties. At which point both parties need to sit down and discuss their interpretation of each detail to determine that each party clearly understands the common goal of each aspectÃall within the construction schedule alloted. Important financial aspects such as retention money, progress payments, and supply advances (only pay supply advances with said supplies are secured on your property, but don't be afraid to pay them after a detailed line item inventory review) should be part of a contract. A good contractor works best off the above. Unlike other countries America does not value the trades as they should, so the apprenticeship programs never truly established themselves regarding the trades. Depending on the extent and quality of what you are trying to achieve, you make well need several seasoned trades from rough to finish carpentry. Rarely is there a universal tradesman (one-man show) as this is relegated to the handyman status (and there are excellent handyman out there so this is not demeaning).

As we are now entering downtimes for the construction industry you will see that the better contractors still have work, but have a line of clients waiting to have work done. This holds true at both the commercial and residential levels. Paying the better contractors what appears, at the time, to be a higher price typically pays off in the long run as they do the job correctly, and be called upon to backup their work in the future. Be leery of very low bids. Again, if the contractor and you follow what I have outlined at the beginning of this post, but still arrive at a very low bid anyway it will not make sense in detailed writing. A portfolio of verifiable work goes a long way, and the better contractors are proud to display their work through a portfolio and even taking you to visit the actual work.

Also, ask the person who is quoting you the bid whether they will be the person running the job and how much time they be spending on siteÃthen put that into the contract. If they are only writing bids, and having a foreman run the jobÃmeet the foreman first before signing any contract as you want to meet the person whom you will be interfacing with the most to determine whether you can get along with each other. Secure, as part of the contract, whom the lead will be and what percentage they will be on the job site. Have the foreman sitting down with you when you go over the plans and specifications as they will be the building it.

Use Conditional and Unconditional Lien Releases as part of the contract.

Hello fahenheit 451....the temp at which books burn.....Thank you so much for providing such helpful information.It seems commonsense on some things like asking to meet with the foreman, but I never considered it since I only had one person for years.

Financial matters were great points.

All the different tips you provided were just what I needed to read and will definitely be utilized.Thanks again.

To all GW members in the LI area...Since I only have 1 referral so far,is there anyone over the moon with their kitchen contractor or simply just happy with their work?

I appreciate any recommendations you could provide?

Thanks to all for taking the time and effort to respond.

I don't know where abouts in Long Island you are, but if you're anywhere near Hicksville, I can give you a terrific tile guy. :-) Shopt me an email if you're interested.

billvincent...Thanks so much.

I will let you know what we decide. We would only need him/her for a backsplash,I guess, since the floor is supposed to be wood.

Anyone else on the island with a kitchen contractor?