Sounds like we've got some good diet and exercise plans going on, and that's great. Improving our health is so important. But I really, really don't want this thread to turn into "just another diet and exercise" thread.

Let's not forget the other aspects of our lives -- our self-confidence, our spiritual selves, our closest relationships, careers, children, habits, ethics, friendships, foibles and phobias. Making improvements there is, IMO, EVERY BIT as important as eating right and exercising.

I thought I'd post another definition of Mojo -- This from the Urban Dictionary:

1. Self-confidence, Self-assuredness. As in basis for belief in ones self in a situation. Esp. in context of contest or display of skill such as sexual advances or going into battle.
2. Good luck fetish / charm to bolster confidence.
3. ability to bounce back from a debilitating trauma and negative attitude

So - Who's done something great lately? Or perhaps, something 'small' that was, for whatever reason, difficult yet important?

Sweeby, you rock.

The "karma bus" is bound to make a very nice stop at your door. That is such a lovely coda to your post.

"3. ability to bounce back from a debilitating trauma and negative attitude "

&*&!! My mojo ain't bouncin' back from negative attitude right now! DH & I got 10 miles out on our bike ride today, he flipped over the handlebars. Just got back from the hospital. Looks like a torn rotator cuff. Our Italy bike trip is 12 days away. Darn, darn, darn... Oh well. Could have been worse. He hit his head really hard on the pavement, but thank God for helmets. Nothing was broken, no bad abrasions. And we're still going to Italy, though not sure if he can handle the biking part. Not looking for sympathy, just amazed at the irony of it all.
I guess on the bright side, I didn't come home & stuff my face from stress!

Hope you all had a fruitful fitness weekend.

Wow awm, glad DH is OK. Italy will be fabulous, biking or not. You will bounce.

Sweeby, such a powerful (but intimidating) invitation to celebrate all victories. Good thought though.

I did finish the tower skylight painting today, and I am pleased to have made myself repeatedly climb up there. That was an accomplishment for me. In the past I have had to hit the deck (drop and sit) at cliffs or other high points. I did not panic and I did not fall - but I did tip the roller tray today as I was stretching, and dumped a good cup or two of paint before I realized it. And of course it landed on the carpet where the drop cloth wasn't. What a mess.

Difficult, yes. Important, eh. Not really in the grand scheme of things. But I'm happy it is done and very happy I did it.

Sweeby - Thank you soooo much for your post. I was thinking the same thing, but wasn't sure how to get it across without sounding like a wet noodle! You said it perfectly! Although weight is a big factor for many of us, there are many other areas we need to work on.

I already stated one of my victories in an earlier post. (It falls under your category of difficult, yet important) I went for a physical this week, and am still a little nervous awaiting the test results. I hate going to doctors and only go when I am REALLY sick. I honestly can't remember the last time I had a physical. I've thought about it for years, but just kept putting it off.

awm - hope DH will recover quickly.

celtic - working to overcome your fear of heights is definately a victory to celebrate. You should be proud of yourself.

Congrats to all of you that are getting on track with your diet and fitness.

I will think about what other changes or improvements I want to make. What about the rest of you?

Very good post Sweeby. Here is something that has weighed on my mind for awhile that I'm working on.

I have kind of lost touch with some of my friends over the years. Some of this has to do with them having families and being busy, some of it has to do with me being busy with work, but some of it just has to do with me being a person who can be quite happy doing things by myself in my free time not surrounded by alot of people. But it concerns me that I'm becoming kind of a "loner" aside from time spent at work and with DH. My mom was kind of like this too and really spent her last years quite isolated except for time spent with me and DH.

So, I made a major effort to reuinite some close friends from college. I organized a dinner party at my house this past weekend. Some of us have seen each other a bit but this group has not gotten together for probably five years. I had not seen one of the people who came in over 10 years - probably closer to 15.

I'm not a regular entertainer (like some of the people on the cooking forum). I like to cook and do things like that but I have to give it alot of thought, planning, etc. and I'm a bit of a perfectionist so it's kind of a big deal.

Anyway, it was all very delightful and fun. We poured over photos of our skinny, wrinkle-free, young selves when we were in college which had us laughing hysterically. And we shared all kinds of trials and tribulations of the past few years including breast cancer, various gynecological disorders, DH career dilemmas and midlife crises, etc.

I was so happy I made the effort to do this - we made a pact to get together once a year. I didn't say it but I thought - you never know what may happen - and how many more times we'll all be able to do this.

In spite of the big soiree I managed to ride my bike 4x and did the ball routine 2x, made something from Cooking Light for the dinner, and limited myself to two tortilla chips - which someone else brought.

I'm hoping no one got too offended at that addendum... It's important, I think, to stay focused on the larger picture of our whole lives.

I'm having a major mojo challenge today -- feeling helpless and frustrated, and can't seem to see my way clear to a solution. My younger son has some developmental disabilities, and we're trying to firm up his educational arrangements for next year. Trouble is, we don't really like what the school (private LD) has proposed -- another year with the same teacher and same group of kids. (Two years is the norm here, so there's no "held back" stigma.) Our concern is that our son is the highest-functioning kid in this class, and we don't think the teacher's personality is a good fit for him. She's chronically stressed-out, impatient, inexperienced and teaches to the class midpoint, which is understandable, but below what our son is capable of. We've already asked her for extra work, and it only lasted a week. There is another group of same-age kids who our son is friends with, and they are moving on to another, very talented teacher, who is very individual in her lessons. Trouble there, is that our son would be the lowest-functioning kid in that class, probably by a decent margin. A third possibility is a class where my son loves the teacher and she loves him, but the kids are even lower-functioning than where he is now. The only reason I'm even considering it is that the teacher-kid bond is so great and the teacher does her academic work one-on-one.

I'm feeling like there's no 'win' here... And that the problem is chronic, not this-year only. This school was a perfect fit for him 4 years ago, but doesn't seem to be anymore. Which is sad, because it's a lovely warm and supportive environment, and I doubt there's anything better out there... My son seems to fall right into the gap between 'learning disabled' and mentally retarded, so no *program* seems to fit.

Any words of wisdom?

What did I read recently: wisdom is experience tempered by pain.

Everyone over a certain age has pain whether they share it or not. Some are able; others cannot so easily especially in a place as public as the internet.

Sweeby I don't think you offended anyone by your addendum and it was a lovely thought for all.

I think some of us haven't posted because we don't have much success to report diet-wise. Also, I gotta tell ya I was a health editor for a while and that glycemic index stuff (which I also was tested for at one point!) just makes my head spin although for sure it will work for many. I know my body and know how I can lose and just keep telling myself that if my activity level exceeds my caloric intake I will lose weight and I know that's true, of course. We all know it's true cause Oprah's trainer tells us so.

So I'm not doing fabulous but not sinking either. My hat's off to you ladies who are tracking and trekking and losing -- go for it!! I really want to keep up.

But if anyone else is functioning on the same low level here that I seem to be then this misery would love company if you want to post and admit it and maybe we can poke each other into moving faster. Or I can be the only one, which never bothers me.

Sweeby, re you DS. (((((momhug))))) Unless it proves too stressful for him, it seems to me that putting him in a class with the higher functioners could help his self image and performance in terms of his feeling that he's in a peer group of those who can accomplish rather than not --but he would need to be a child who can respond to being pushed; some can and for others it's not so good. And the teacher must be part of the equation.

But it's a delicate assessment because I wouldn't want to put my child into a group where he's destined to feel he's failing or the "worst" one either. My concern about the middle is that it might foster less growth since it's the most comfortable place from what you are saying.

Long ago I briefly taught a group of little boys who were quite slow some reading skills and they were very aware of who was able to do what in their little group.
So can you talk to him about it? I think some kids can be very realistic about how they fit and where they are comfortable so I wonder if he has any ideas?

If not, then you will instinctively know your child better than anyone and trust yourself to decide.

Sweeby,
My heart goes out to you, as a parent who has traveled the road you're currently on. It's difficult when there isn't an ideal, or even feasible plan offered to meet all of your child's educational needs.

Could DS be integrated into the classroom with his friends and be assigned a specialist to provide extra assistance on a one on one basis (in and/or out of the classroom setting)? Especially as you say, that teacher is receptive and gears to individualized instruction.

I have to run, but let me put on my thinking cap.

Sweeby,

I loved that you added to the ''mojo'' definition. I have no suggestions for you, but know you'll do the best thing for your son when the opportunity presents itself.

Regarding functioning on a low level, I have been hovering over my 23 lb. mark for a few weeks. Between getting sick, having company and generally being worn out, my scale hasn't budged, except to go up. Neither have I been on my treadmill. I'm not worried, since I know I'll get back to this when I start feeling better, however I'd like to celebrate a 25 lb. loss and it's just not happening.

On the plus side (and sometimes it takes whatever you can conjure up), I was able to walk to my neighbor's house without huffing (there are some big hills) to leave a little April Fool's package for them on their front porch. I thoroughly enjoyed preparing this little gift (a box of Boudreaux's Butt Paste...guess what their name is?) tying it up most attractively with a note that read: On this April Fool's Day, we've been looking for an appropriate time to say, Thinking of You! I topped the bow with a stack of three Life Savers, because for some people Butt Paste may well just be. (A life saver that is.) OK, I'm squirrely, but it was a beautiful day, and that walk to their house was something I wouldn't even consider doing in the past. I'm feeling good, even if progress has been slow, so I'm celebrating that.

You might say I've come a long way, even though I don't seem to be going anywhere!

I love hearing about everyone's progress.

I've never come over to conversations before, but thought I'd give it a try and I saw this thread. I'm hoping I'm not too late to join you all.

3.5 years ago I was in the best shape of my life - doing a triathlon and loving how I looked and how I felt. I also met my husband 3.5 years ago. He can eat whatever he wants. I got complacent, sedentary, and ate out alot. 30 pounds later, here I am. So, my goal is to get my activity level back up to where I'm happy with how I look AND feel! Step 1 - signed up for the 39 mile Avon Walk for Breast Cancer at the end of May. Now I gotta do it!

Turnaround Date: Monday, April 4, 2006
Weight: 175
Exercise: Gym 3 days per week, walking on weekends (long ones)
Mood: Focused on Success!

Off to the gym!

Sweeby, I'm not at all offended, either! :-) Each of us seems to be expanding the topic by discussing our own personal issues and concerns, anyway, and that's fine with me...we'll be into Part 2 pretty soon anyway. So it's agreed: we define our mojo as the drive to get back on track with our lives; weight loss and exercise is only one of the routes to that goal.

As for your concern about your son's class assignment, the higher-functioning class makes the most sense to me. You already have experience with each of these teachers, so you know what to expect from them; none of them is an "unknown quantity." You know that the current teacher won't give your child extra stimulation and enrichment materials to develop on his own. However, the teacher with the high-F class will give your son individualized attention, and, in a class with his friends, he will push himself to keep up with them. It sounds like the teacher will have realistic goals for him and will help him achieve them. Do you think the school will reassign your son on the basis of your request?

gibby, your reconnection with your old friends sounds like fun. I'm also feeling a need to reestablish contact with family and friends that have slipped out of touch. Working on my genealogy, I've been so excited to find distant cousins, but there are also family members I used to KNOW, when I was a child, and I haven't written to them yet---I know I should do that, before it's too late, as they're already in their 70s and 80s. I'm also looking forward to my 40th college reunion. Some of the workshops deal with exploring new directions and making transitions at this stage of our lives. I have a feeling that, as great as it will be to see old friends again, I will mostly find part of my SELF again. At least, I hope so.

It has now been 7 months since I retired, and I have to decide what to be "when I grow up": should I work again (rococogirl, I was also a medical editor) or just take it easy? I'm still recovering from burnout and my back injury, so I've put off a decision for a while. But part of getting my mojo back is simply getting more out of each day; after a few months of drifting, I think I need to set up a more structured day (those of you with jobs, classes, and small children probably don't know what I'm talking about!). When you don't have anything scheduled, you can sleep late, not get dressed till afternoon, and put off chores till tomorrow or next week. It's easy to just read the forums all day! I still have a lot of projects to accomplish around the house, and I'm beginning to see that a simple plan for the day would help me get the work done. Losing weight, getting more exercise, and getting a handle on what may be a glycemic problem should give me more energy to achieve that and live a more orderly, productive life.

Sue

Thanks Rococo, Pauline, Claire & Sue for your support! I know there isn't an easy answer to this one, but I feel like doing nothing would be a failure, and this issue is WAY too important to fail on.

To answer your questions, DS would be "the worst" in the higher-functioning class, no doubt about it; he's been there before, and it did dampen his self-esteem. I hear you about the informal social heirarchy about who does well or poorly in school and which classes are 'better' than others - but that pecking order is remarkably minor at this school. (Nothing like a school for autistic kids for blurring those subtle social heirarchies ;-) And as to extra help, we already do some of that, and would absolutely have to do more to keep him afloat. Probably a good thing in any case. Sue - I'm not sure the director would put him into that class if I ask; that teacher is very popular and it may be too large anyway.

On a good-mojo note, I did have a pretty candid discussion with the director of the school, discussing our reservations. The only thing I soft-peddled was my opinion about the current teacher's personality. I know the director has heard complaints about this teacher - mainly from the other teachers (they hate her) - but I'm concerned about saying too much negative in case it gets out and my son has her again next year... (I was room mom this year, so DS and I are both in her good graces.) I've also lined up appointments to talk to the other private LD schools in the city and put out feelers looking for Sp Ed parents at our local public schools. So I guess I'm doing everything that can be done. And since there IS no silver bullet, I'll have to be content with that.

Rococo - Sometimes not sinking is success. What was it they said at my most recent first WW meeting? Breaking the inertia is the hardest step. Once you get moving, it's much easier to keep moving. How about one small step in any arena? Make it an easy one.

Claire - I LOVE your April Fool's joke! Clever, spunky, and witty. Definite mojo stuff.

And Gibby - Calling some old friends is great -- just the type of thing I need to do. But I'll have to work up to it as it falls into the 'small but difficult' category for me too.

I just wanted to add another comment about Sweeby's post on the mojo. I think it is such a good idea to be open to all thoughts about life improvements and obstacles to overcome. I think more and more about how I could be improving and how I should be living as I rapidly approach 50.

Plus I think it's all quite relevant to the idea of being fit and healthy. I don't know about the rest of you but how positive I feel about other things in life has a big impact on how much I care about my diet, exercise, etc. There have been times when I've been in a funk - eating ice cream - taking a nap - etc. So I think it is a nice idea for the group to be open to the entire mojo.

claire de luna - I loved reading about your day - everyone should be celebrating their victories like you are - even if they seem small.

I agree Sweeby that there are many Mojo dimensions. DH and I were talking a while back about balance and we drew on his office greaseboard a kind of manadala or wheel, and came up with six pie slices:

physical (health, strength, flexibility, diet)
spiritual (religious, meditative, moral)
social (friends, relatives, neighbors, community activity)
intimate (immediate family, communication, closeness, sexuality)
material (saving, budgeting, security, housekeeping)
productive (work, hobbies, learning)

It is still up there as a reminder to seek balance. Attention to each area seems so important. Facing challenges and coaxing growth and movement/evolution - there's some serious Mojo.

May we all move.

Oh Sweeby, I'd forgotten you have a son with issues. My heart goes out to you. How old is your son? We found out late in the game that our 22 1/2 year old has a "hidden" LD (NLD -- kinda like Asperger's Lite, but enough disability to really screw up these transition-to-adulthood years). Later we found out our youngest has ADD (no hyperactivity at least). He lasted one semester in college last fall. We're "regrouping" & will try, try again.

Anyway, that third option in the lower level class -- hard-working nurturing teacher, good one on one -- may be a decent choice. Trying it for one year might be okay. I'd definitely avoid the high strung teacher. Think back to your own school years and remember how a cold unfriendly teacher was so off-putting. Your son probably picks up on the negativity, even if he can't express it. And if your son lacks self-comforting abilities, then a teacher with good warm interpersonal skills is extra important. You always perform your best for someone you like.

kisaacs, welcome! Good for you that you're doing something about your weight before you get too far gone. I'll bet as a former tri-athlete you'll get your groove back fast.

CdL: Patience, gal! You've come so far. Don't dispair, just a leeetle perseverence, and you'll get through this stage just fine. You're strong. You can hang in there until your mojo starts workin' (Koko Taylor singing in the background).

rococo: small steps, now. Even the little things you do will pay off on the long run. You say you're not sinking, but still: you've been walking, you've been cutting back some calories, you've lost a pound, & your clothes fit better. That's good progress! Don't worry about how far you need to go. It'll discourage you. Set your focus on the little things, the doable things, for now.

Life improvements: at 51, I'd like to be moving on to other things & some self-focus, but still too focused on my sons, and necessarily so, for that yet. Losing weight & exercising consumes much mental energy as it is. One improvement at a time! Down half a pound to 179.5 today.

Well, Sweeby's mojo rehab suggestion #3 has finally prompted me to post, after lurking on this thread since the beginning.

Bizarrely, I have to get back to the gym and my karate classes to gain some weight, since I'm hovering at 93lbs at the moment. (I know, it sounds impossibly light, but I'm 5'1" and usually weigh 100 or so-- although in another life I weighed 150lbs)

Some of you may remember my post about the sky falling on my head sometime in mid Nov, in mid renovation when my DH told me the reno had sent him over the edge and he was contemplating leaving.

About a month ago I asked him to leave. He'd spent the previous 6 months sleeping in his clothes on the couch. He wouldn't come within a 5 ft radius of me. He refused to go out anywhere with me, saying that he felt tense and uncomfortable in my presence.

We were in marriage counseling at the time. After he left I made it clear that I wanted to continue working on the relationship, going to therapy etc but within the week he terminated counseling (the therapist, who was seeing me individually that week, actually told me we were broken up.)

Anyway, I think I've made it through the worst; still have limited sense of time and space, but have started working on new project. Am seeing v good CBT therapist. My girls (6&9) seem to be weathering everything ok, esp now that I've ceased to be a puddle. 'Tho I know it's hurting them and cannot just cannot bear to think about it.

Things with DH remain in saga mode. Am learning beaucoup, but still have trouble not feeding into DH's view of me-- ie I'm the crazy hysteric, and he's the beleagered rational man whose abusive wife kicked him out.

En tout cas, the mojo thing is definitely of interest to me! I know I have to fight to not descend into the pit of self recrimination and hatred.

Oh and just a note to all those trying to lose weight-- if I can lose 50lbs, believe me anyone can!

Thanks for listening. (It's all very personal and purple isn't it? Should probably change my G'web 'handle' to something a little more anonymous...)

Congrats to all for your perseverence and support of each other! Have been spending much less time on the computer and more reading BOOKS and walking with DH after dinner. Have no idea about poundage, but I have way more energy and long walks are always good for the marriage :-)

nsmontreal, hugs to you! Bless your heart- your world did fall in on you. Glad you honed in on this thread - it's not 'just' about losing weight, but about being happy and healthy. Please take care of yourself and check in often.

Sweeby- thanks for starting this- glad to know about the 'white' food.

Glad you're here Nsmontreal. I was just thinking about you the other day and wondering how things were going. I hope the counseling is helping (helped me tremendously in the past) and that you get the results you're hoping for. Tough sometimes figuring out what that is, or rather, what it ought to be...

Reading BOOKS Pecan -- good for you! I'm doing some of that too, trying to read the classics my liberal California education didn't consider important. I can feel those brain cells stretching ;-) But it's a little tough when I'm reading and DH comes into the room with that "since you're not doing anything..." attitude.

Everyone still 'on the wagon' today? I'm making progress on the DS school front, having organized what it is we want (3 things) and come to the conclusion that we can't possibly find it all on one place. But we may be able to hit 1 of the 3 at the school we're at, or 2 of the 3 if we change. But I'm moving forward with a clearer vision and purpose today, which is what this thread is all about.

Rococo, Paulines - you here?

I just landed. Had a small slice of pizza for lunch but I'm not kicking myself, just still walking more this am and did some stretching and situps last night. But excellent protein/veg dinner last night. More walking and stairs this pm and tonight.

My goal is the gym tomorrow and continuing protein/veg no white stuff for the rest of the week.

Must say I had great satisfaction over the weekend in feeling my house was finally settled (last furniture delivered) Our reno began May 03! It is possible!!

My UCLA Bruins lost last night but they made it to the finals so I was really proud of them.

Nsmontreal -- I almost posted last week as I was thinking of you and wondering how you were faring. As long as you have the support of a good therapist you will come through this. We all have and while it can take a long time I can only say that I hope you will come out the other side stronger, more self-knowledgeable and happier as I and so many others have. You deserve to be happy and I believe you must for the sake of your children.

Being underweight from aggravation is never good but you could keep in mind that infamous phrase often attributed to the Duchess of Windsor. LOL!

Awm -- thanks for the shout out yesterday. It really did help.

Sweeby -- sounds like you're making progress on the school issues; good thing.

Sue, our weather's been chilly past few days, in fact, snow is predicted tomorrow :(, but as soon as it warms up, I'll be back to walking and share sights & stories with you!

I'm here, Sweeby. You're sounding a bit more hopeful and positive re' DS, I'm so glad.

kisaacs & nsmontreal, glad you're joining us!

Rococo, that's great news about your house being settled!

Today was a busy day, ran out early and grabbed a half a sub on the return trip home (well, it was a whole sub, but I only ate half). I have to make it a point to eat breakfast in the morning, and then I find it's easier to stick to healthy eating the rest of the day.

I DID IT! Went to a luncheon today-and drank only a few sips of wine, passed COMPLETELY on the bread and knocked the whipped cream off the berries for dessert. I don't remember ever passing on bread before... Having a support group really does help.

Question about 'the whites'- what about milk and cottage cheese? I can't take calcium supplements (migraine) and have kept the bone density up with 3+ glasses of skim a day. Please don't tell me I have to put chocolate in it :-)

Attagirl pecanpie, way to stick to your goals.

re white food: no reason to eliminate skim milk, yogurt, cottage cheese, cauliflower, canned artichokes, onions, mozzarella cheese, turnips, fish or water chestnuts from your diet just because they're white. All these things in proper amounts are good for you and add variety to your diet.

Personally, I don't believe in avoiding "white foods." You can have anything, just as long as you stay within your calorie limits. Of course you're better off substituting whole grains for refined (usually white) and monitoring your sugar intake -- but these things certainly aren't going to do bad things to you if you consume them occasionally and in moderation. You can get fat on fruits & veggies, even, if you eat more than you burn off. It still boils down to calorie amounts consumed.

Okay, how many servings of fruits & veggies did everybody have today? I had 8, but am including the componants of a *huge* salad at dinner time.

Uh Oh, I started this "white food" thing, so let me fix it.

I just use "White Food" as shorthand for refined flour and sugar. Cottage cheese, milk, cauliflower - all very OK - even though their color is white.

Perhaps I should have said "White Granulated/Refined/Starchy Food", but somehow that doesn't have the same ring...

Kudos to all doing well. I've been swamped with work - let too much go while painting.
I will get to the Y
I will do my taxes
I will get to the Y
I will do my taxes
I will get to the Y....

Pauline - I can relate to your weather/exercise issues. I haven't gotten my walk in the last 2 days because the weather was cold & windy :( Where did Spring go??? I guess I'm gonna have to break out a workout video, because today doesn't look much better and I have to keep moving.

Gibby - good for you for arranging a reunion! Sounds like you had a lot of fun. I had a get together with 5 HS girlfriends at my house about 2 yrs ago, and we had a blast. Sadly, we haven't all gotten together again as a group, but have seen them all individually. I sometimes get aggravated that I am always the catalyst for group get togethers. Everyone has such a great time, but some will never reciprocate by hosting anything. Why is that? I know people are busy, but I think old friendships are so important to maintain.

Sue - I can really relate to your feelings since leaving your job. I remember your dilemma about whether to leave, and I am so glad things worked out for you! I left a VERY stressful job of 18 years almost 3 yrs ago, and have never looked back. It took me a long time to feel like myself again. I have really tried to enjoy the slower pace of life now, and get used to not just "living for the weekend". When I first quit, I was like a whirlwind around my house getting all kinds of things accomplished. Since then I have taken master gardening and interior design classes. It was a new concept for me to take a class simply for enjoyment. Have you considered this? Many times I've thought about jumping back into the workforce, but I am so afraid of getting back in the cesspool of stress. You are smart to try to put some goals & structure into your days. I need to make that a goal of mine too.

Sweeby - it sounds like you're well on your way to making your decision about DS's schooling. You've gotten some great advice here, and in the end, should follow your gut.

Celtic - your breakout of the areas of life to focus on is a good one. It is good that you keep it visable to work on achieving balance. (get those taxes done!)

Nsmontreal - I missed your post you referred to. Sending hugs your way! Hang in there.

rococo - congrats on getting your home done! What a huge accomplishment.

pecan - good for you for making good choices. Don't you feel great when you do the right thing?

Okay, I now need to get my a$$ off this couch, pop my video in and get my day in gear!! Carpe Diem!!!

Pecan,

Perhaps you already know this but other good sources of calcium are sardines (if you can stand them), and the green cruciferous veggies like kale and collard greens. I believe arugula helps as well, also asparagus. Lots of others in this chart.

For those of us who take supplements the latest study says they don't do much anyway.

Veggies are better I'd venture.

Here is a link that might be useful: Calcium content in veggies

45 mins. on elliptical; 7 servings of fruits & veggies. Anybody else have a successful dieting day? Hope so... Hang in there, everybody!

I was really lame on vegies - so lame I won't even comment. I did have 4 or 5 fruits that day and I went to the grocery store tonight to restock so I should be in better shape for a while. I'm getting worse about evening meals now that I'm exercising most nights after work. If I'm working later, really busy or out of town on the weekend and don't plan for the week I am in trouble. I don't eat bad things usually - I just don't have all the right stuff for a decent meal. So I end up having more carbs and not enough vegies - though I do pretty much stick to the whole grain vs. white stuff.

Anyway, today was a great day because it finally got over 60 degrees and I went for a 30 minute walk instead of riding the exercise bike. What a treat!! Being that I have only one real leg and one prosthetic leg, not every day is a good walking day. However today was a good day plus it was one of the first "warm" days so what more could you ask for? How about an adjustable prosthetic foot that allows you to wear different heel heights for the first time in twenty three years - got one of those today too!

I'm so depressed you guys. I'm so PROUD of all of you. But I just can't seem to get it together. A good day, a bad day. Stress eating, stress starving. Drinking WAY too much vino.

What is WRONG with me? I could cry. Meanwhile, I just get huger and huger.

Sob,
Ivette

nsmontreal- curious to learn how you lost 50 pounds and kept it off.

And curious to know if you were married to your husband when you were 150pounds.

Good luck through your separation.

Ivette you're living in a construction site, shlepping like a horse, working a job, being a mom, taking design classes (like you don't have enough to do right now). And more.

So you wonder why you're eating for comfort?

(((((((((((Ivette)))))))))

I say lose the wine, cut bread and sweets you've got a start.

And any exercise (says she who hasn't done any either).

Ivette, what Rococogirl said! When you're living in so much stress/mess, you're accomplishing something if you just tread water!

gibby, sounds like you are doing a lot of things right. Next week, you can put more veggies on your shopping list, so you'll be prepared.

pecan and awm, way to go!

kisaacs and nsmontreal, glad you're joining us!

neverdone, it's interesting that you've had a similar experience with leaving a stressful job. I haven't looked back, except to affirm to myself, every day, that it was the right decision. I was only 60 years old when I was going through all that angst last year, and if the nature of the job had not changed so much, I would certainly still be working. I never considered this to be "retirement"; I told my clients that I was leaving "for health reasons" (which was true, but not the whole story), and they jumped to the conclusion that I was retiring. Some of my coworkers did, too, so I just let them think that. My friends, of course, knew the truth. It was nice being congratulated for quitting my job! Anyway, since I sort of stumbled into a premature retirement, that's probably the reason I'm floundering a bit now. In the next week, I'm going to concentrate on developing a more organized plan for the way I spend my time.

I think it would be lovely to take some classes, and I'll explore that option. Actually, my genealogical research is an education...but I'd like to learn more about the historical context.

But, enough about me! Except to say that I've walked almost every day and have had no dietary indiscretions. I've been eating a more substantial lunch (e.g., tuna and veggies instead of yogurt) and then having fruit or carrots plus a protein snack (yogurt or milk) in the late afternoon. No pre-dinner fuzzy-headedness!

Sue

Pirula, nothing's wrong with you! Be kind to yourself and don't worry about the stress eating days. Re:vino-- this is precisely why I took up karate, to stay off the wine! (I doubt that my instructor would find that a good reason to join mais bon.) I find exercising in the evening sometimes helps the morale as well...

mlaj200,
My case is sort of complicated because I had an eating disorder in my late teens to early 20s (long, long ago.) It went away very gradually and when it did I still weighed about 30lbs more than usual. I went back to school at 27 and started exercising (just weights and cardio 3x week-- never more, never less.) I met my partner at 30, and the last 10-15lbs came off during that year. I remember feeling surreptiously terrified as I lost weight. I had spent so many years obsessing over my appearance, and it turned out to be such a monstrous red herring.

I hate to speak Oprah, but being empathetic with yourself and learning to respect how self healing the body really is goes a long way when it comes to weight loss. I'm not entirely certain that it has much to do with discipline or restraint. At least for me. It is a 'journey' though, and perseverance is key. So is forgiveness, as odd as that sounds. Health, not extra weight, is the real issue.

Thanks for your responses to my above saga. It helped so much in Nov, and am v glad to reconnect now. What an extraordinary bunch of people you are! It makes me giggle to think that virtual voices on a kitchen website can make such a difference but it's nice to experience the internet's warm, fuzzy side. French intellectuals would not agree, I know.

Rococogrl, did you truly go through something like this and come out the other side? It seems impossible. I dread the crying the most.

ns,

My particular version of course, but yes. It took me a long time and I'd never say it was easy or fun but for some of us it is necessary. It turned out wonderfully for me and I believe in doing the work and learning the lessons and making better choices afterwards as a result because what's being chosen is an enhancement, not a trade off. This is core work, never a lark. Mourning the relationship is the first step though. I like to laugh, not cry, but it's important to let the emotions out lest the grief and anger make you ill. And it's important for your children to see you grieving as they must too, in a way. It's a loss for them as well.

Hope it's not too late to climb aboard. I had a pretty good exercise routine before my knee injury in Fall 2004, but since then I've had to watch what I do or my knee would begin to swell. Anyway, I gained a few pounds (10 more or less), but that's not the problem. It's the jello feeling in more parts of the body than I would like, SO my turnaround date actually began in the New Year. However, with my sister's diagnosis of cancer, I found myself very busy tending to her needs and not doing enough exercise. Result? BURNOUT/flab. So my real turnaround came three weeks ago.

I was going to the water aerobics class off and on at the gym, but now I'm being consistent and workout at least 3/week. DH and I walk at the park (3 miles) about 3/week also, and I go the gym at night with him and do a little weights (shoulder problems), use the bike and also the treadmill. This varies but we've been going 2-3/week.

As far as dieting goes, I try to avoid junk foods, and eat lots of salads and veggies with my meals. We've also cut back on red meat, and we don't eat white rice or white flour (most of the time). I'm a big fan of brown rice and whole wheat/whole grain breads.

Oh, another thing I decided was important was also to get back to reading (El Zahir by Paulo Coelho is my book of choice right now), and spend less time on the computer and more time socialising and catching up with long, lost friends.

Turnaround Date: Monday, 13th March.
Weight: Have about 5 lbs to lose
Exercise: 4-5 days
Mood: Very determined

What a great group of people you are! Fascinating, strong, wise, fallible... I just love women and think we make the world go 'round! Where would we be without our friends?

An adjustable foot - how cool is that? And it's great that prosthetics have come so far that walking for exercise can be a joy.

Ivette - don't be so hard on yourself. We've ALL been down in that wallowing place, and it IS terribly hard to get out of it. Do you have a turning point coming up? Some major change in sight? It might help if you can identify some event that will help trigger and anchor your own personal turnaround. (For me it was finding a hormone imbalance and starting treatment.) You have to be mentally ready, but when you are, we're here for you.

A fabulous thing happened this morning. It was still dark and I was tired when my alarm went off, but I dragged my drousy behind out of bed, put on my workout clothes, and left the house for my morning walk before I could change my mind. And within the first 2 minutes - there it was. That wonderful rush of fresh air, energy, vitality and the lift of spirit you get from exercising. I felt great, charged, powerful again.

Yesterday was the two-week anniversary of my turnaround day, and I've lost 6 pounds and am feeling better about my life. It's not "all better" -- life's too complicated for that. But the tide has turned, and it's getting better.

Sweeby, you are doing great!

Welcome aboard, Marioposast...too many letters - may have to dub you "marip"!

Sounds like some of us are dutifully on track, some are stuck and the rest are back and forth. (I'm in the latter group). We can just keep trying.

Pirula, you have been in my head all morning. I've been debating whether to chime in with support, or to coax you to consider that you might have a clinical depression. Much harder to will yourself out of a depression. I could say more on what to look for, but you may know all that already.

Meanwhile it might be nice to gift yourself with some special "feeding". Daffodils bedside or one spectacular flower for your computer area. Spritz of cologne on your pillow. Rental of a classic chick flick. Rasberries and a bit of wondrous chocolate. If you don't want to give up the vino, cut back but drink a better class of vino - expensive enough you will have to stretch that bottle out over a few days. Pretend you are French and have it with perfect cheese. Oh, and be sure you are not simply thirsty in the evening - force a few glasses of water before the wine. Mostly, see that this is a rough time and you truly deserve anything that will help you feel better. You know you have our support - seems like many of us have been through that can't-get-out-of-bed-or-stop-crying place.

As for my check in: I was up until 1am, but finished the taxes!! (can't believe I am the only procrastinator in this motley crew. Fess up, the rest of you). It was awful because I had to reconstruct my entire year to figure and document mileage and other petty expense details. Good news is that because I earned less than expected, and we gave more away, and we deferred more income (yay, catchup retirement contributions for those over 50), we will get a nice refund. And duh, I guess I should have used the married rather than single tax tables during the year to figure my quarterly tax payments. My stupidity amazes me sometimes - I couldn't figure out why I had to pay so much!!

And I got to the Y this morning. So far a good day.

Hope you all are having a good one too.

I'm a procrastinator, and a friend of mine sent me a link to flylady, but I won't sign up for newsletters. I hear they bombard you with 'tips' :D

Mari would be just fine Celtic.

I too am trying to get myself organised this spring and start working on my lists of 'things to do.' It's amazing how you can get stuck in a rut and then it sort of cascades into the health and exercise aspect of your life.

Thanks for starting this thread Sweeby. I like the idea of checking in and being accountable on some levels.

Have a great day everyone.

Wow Sweeby - six pounds - that is great!

Pirula - I've been thinking about you too! I think I kind of know the type of funk you are talking about. I've had those times where I am just unmotivated, uninspired, and just don't feel like doing anything but eating and drinking vino!! At times like that I've found I could change completely overnight if I had some fun/interesting project/event to focus on. I haven't had this kind of funk in quite a while - I'm not sure what changed. Though I have gone alcohol free - not sure if that had anything to do with it. Anyway, hang in there!

Oh Sweeby! That's wonderful news -- I'm so happy for you! Just think: if you keep up the good work, by next week you'll have lost even more weight!

Now Ivette: you DO have it together. But you have a full plate for now. rococo's right-- lose the wine, cut the bread & sweets, and you've got a start. Little things add up before you know it. Sounds like you're really pressed for time, so when you shop, maybe you could load up on canned beans & lots of frozen veggies to throw into crockpot soups & stews. That'll add volume but few calories, and are quick & easy to boot.

Hey, mariposatracianara, welcome!

neverdone, do you have some favorite exercise videos?

Off to bike ride. Need to buck up & brave the cold...brrrr! Checked my BMI at the CDC web site. I am officially no longer obese: merely overweight.

Here is a link that might be useful: BMI calculator from Centers for Disease Control

I took the day off from exercise today. DH was up at 1:30am trying to carry on a conversation and again at 5:30am - and I didn't even get to sleep until 11:30pm. YIKES - I need my sleep. That combined with a grueling day of work and I was ready to come home and just go to bed immediately.

I did manage to redeem myself on dinner though - salmon, broccoli, squash and skim milk. DH helped make dinner which was a rare treat. I think I sounded really haggard when I called to say when I'd be home. Okay, I'm out of here - going to be early tonight - and I can't wait for the weekend!

I only have a minute, but I wanted to thank you. You guy are sweet. Not to worry, I am not depressed. Been there, done that, this ain't that.

Just overwhelmed I guess, and there just aren't enough hours in the day. I have a hard time bothering to diet if I can't work out. Is that just an excuse? Maybe. I dunno. I have GOT to figure out a way to get to the gym. It doesn't help that I had it together for six months before I left Cairo, lost 16 pounds, was running two miles, and now I'm a mess again. Well, at least I know I can do it again.

I've got to walk 39 miles in two day at the end of the month. Yah, that should be a boost eh? Jeez. I HAVE to do it too, I've raised over $4K and I cannot let my friends down!

Ivette

Wow Ivette - $4K! That's outstanding! How can you call yourself 'a mess' when you've done that? What's the cause?

And taxes?... Celtic, how can you call yourself a procrastinator when you've got them done? I haven't even started yet! I positively *hate* doing taxes.

An update on the school 'thing' -- I talked with the director of our private school, and she pretty much nixed the low-functioning class as too low, and the high-functioning class as already full. She said she'd look into the various class mixes, but I didn't hear much hope. I've started the process toward public school enrollment, and brought DS by the school yesterday when I dropped off his information. He got to meet the diagnostician and the principal, and was thoroughly charming, shaking hands, saying "nice to meet you Mrs. ___" and remembering names. It'll be interesting to see what kind of placement they propose for him. It could be a great opportunity for him - being around more typically-developing children in a typical classroom for the first time ever. But it will also be a challenge to his self-esteem, and if we go that route, he will be forced to confront his differences. Scary all around.

Is everyone still here? KitchencrazyChris? Starpooh? Lori? Claire?

I'm here this morning with a sore throat. I was getting ready for the gym yesterday evening when the weather changed (tornado-type storms). Maybe it was a good thing because I started to feel really weak as the night wore on.

Hoping to maybe walk a little if I don't get knocked down too severely with whatever I picked up.

I gave up chocolates (my real weakness) for Lent. Come Easter Sunday and I'll be a maniac with those chocolates :(

We've eaten brown rice for at least 20 years. I also make whole wheat breads and muffins, and try to sneak in some whole wheat when I make pizza as well. We use whole wheat pasta for lasagna and the kids really love it.

The other thing I changed with the kids was to start buying organic peanut butter with no added oil, sugar or salt. You'd be surprised at what the regular store brands add to their peanut butter.

Have a great, productive day everyone. I'm off to take something for this sore throat. I wonder if it's strep???

Ivette - $4K is awesome! By the sound of it, you're doing the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer too! I've never done it before, but the Boston one is at the end of May. I'm almost done with my fundraising, but only $1800, not $4K!!!

As for my eating and workouts - I've been trying to eat breakfast which has definitely helped with the cravings all morning, and I don't eat the junk anymore. Made it to the gym on Mon, volleyball on Wed, and gym this afternoon. Then lots of walking this weekend.

Keep up the good work everyone!

1703 cals eaten today. Will burn off about 300 of that after 45 min. on the elliptical. I need to stay under 1588 cals today to continue my weight loss: 22 lbs. to date. I tell ya, calorie counting works.

Hi all -

Glad to see so many of you hangin' in!

awm & sweeby - congrats on your losses!

Ivette - Don't be too hard on yourself. I think most of us can relate to being in that rut with weight that you just CAN'T drag yourself out of. Someone mentioned to start with small things and work into a more of a program when you are mentally ready. Every small accomplishment & good choice is a victory! Signing up for 39 miles?? Huge victory!

For the last week & 1/2 I have been trying to make small changes to get myself on the right track. I've been walking 5x week. I've also tried not to totally deprive myself, but to make better choices and eat small portions more often. So far, Ive lost 4 pounds, so I am happy to be moving in the right direction!

In the past, I have found that my biggest challenge is to keep going. I feel like I have so far to go, and get overwhelmed with the big picture. Does anyone else have this problem?

Have a great weekend everyone :)

Hey, neverdone. Good on you re your 4 lbs. lost & your small changes in the right direction. Keep it up!

re overwhelmed: yes, sometimes the best you can do is muddle through but make sure to do the right things bit by bit. Perseverance, I think, is more important than talent in a lot of ways. I have another 50 pounds to lose, but if I dwell on that, I get discouraged. Focusing on making the day's calorie goals is more do-able.

How's everybody else doing? Hope everyone has a happy & healthy weekend. Whole grains & fruits & veggies, y'all!

The weather here is gorgeous today! Maybe 65 degrees, clear, light breezes. I walked for an hour today and am full of energy. Gotta go do something positive for the rest of the day...

Sweeby and all:

I have you wonderful supportive people to thank- I believe I'm onto something that will probably change my life. After a couple of weeks of this no white food business, I have realized a few things-
-I'm not hungry between meals
-I don't get that 'eating dinner WHILE fixing dinner' binge going
-far more energy
-not a migraine the entire time

AND
-no problems with a previously 'unhappy gut' which I had attributed to arthritis meds ripping my intestines up

I think there is a good chance that I'm gluten-sensitive, as a piece of whole-wheat bread Thursday started immediate unpleasantness again. I hadn't had any gluten-containing foods since I signed on to the Sweeby Program- pretty much fruit, veggies and meats, all simply prepared. My appointment for a test is in a couple of weeks.

Meanwhile, that's my story and I'm sticking to it. I really do feel better- thank you all!