Just thought I'd update my post with almost a year's perspective-we did remove a few trees in the back & the overgrown Japanese hollies from the front bed. I've placed in the front bed -3 Winter's Star camellias, a 'Wine & Roses' weigela, moved a TON of daylilies from the back(they were pretty scraggly under a maple), they appear to be Stella D'Oro & while I'm not crazy about daylilies, especially bright gold, they have really filled out the bed (& I can always move them again). I also have gaura 'Whirling Butterflies', pink lilies & liatris, variegated calamintha, sidalcea 'Rosanna', 'Pink Dawn' lantana, a gorgeous cream-colored miniature rose w/ cup shaped blooms, & agastache 'Pink Panther' & 'Blue Fortune', going to put in a blue buddleia this weekend. on the other side of the bed, I did some pruning of the boxwoods, need to do a bit more this winter,planted more pink & 'Stargazer' lilies & liatris & had a huge clump of orange lilies blooming on the end(again, not my favorite color, but I don't have the heart yet to remove them. I planted 'Rozanne' geraniums in a narrow (6' diameter) raised stone bed around a red maple in the front & they did not make it through the winter. I've replanted with hellebores, 'Brandywine', 'Ivory Prince', & 'Spotted Hybrids', Pachysandra procumbens & blue tourenia (I've never really used annuals, but these were recommended to me.)-so far, it looks good. My real joy has been fitting in as many shade loving perennials as I can in the back bed, at least 6 types of geraniums, bletilla striata, pulmonaria, trycirtus, hostas, heuchera, another small Winter's star', rohdea japonica, iris tectorum, bleeding hearts, disporopsis peryni, a very cute mini aruncus aethusifolius...I also have extensive container plantings-4 figs, hibiscus, majesty palm, coleus, cannas, orchids, etc....it helps that I have taken a p/t job at a fabulous garden center. I'm still trying to control my enthusiasm & amend the soil, improve the fertility, keep everything that's here in good health, while planning for the future-maybe a patio next year, &/ or a pond in the boggy corner...life in the garden is good...

Thanks so much for all the responses! Here's my specific situation: I'm the bride-to-be. Fiance and I live on west coast, immediate family lives on east coast, extended family lives all over the country. In a perfect world, we would have a ceremony immediately followed by a reception with all of our close friends and relatives. The logistics of distance, young children, elderly parents, expense of travel, etc, are going to make this nearly impossible, so we've decided on what's really important to us. Fiance and I are thinking of a very small ceremony on the east coast with my parents, his mother, and our brothers, sisters and children. Maybe 20 people at the most. To us, these are the people we most want to share this occasion with, and it's more practical to have the ceremony take place where everyone else lives than to expect everyone to travel out west to our home. Then within a month or so of the wedding, when we're back home, we'd like to have a party with our close circle of friends, simply to mark the occasion and share our happiness with them. We wouldn't expect our east coast parents, brothers or sisters to attend, although they'd certainly be welcome to. I like the rituals of the reception (toast, dinner, dancing, cake, etc) but feel a little awkward having all the rituals at the west coast party without having had the actual wedding ceremony there. But a big party at our home sounds like fun, with perhaps the only wedding ritual a formal wedding cake baked by a friend who's an expert pastry chef. And perhaps some toasts by friends who have been asked ahead of time. In our case my soon-to-be-hubby & I would be hosting the west coast party. No family (except my teenage sons) would likely be attending, although all east coast relatives would certainly be invited. So it sounds like just throwing a regular party, with the general knowledge that we'd just gotten married, is the way to go. On the one hand I like the idea of having the party invitations omit references to the recent marriage because my preference is for no gifts. On the other hand, I feel it's awkward to throw a big party and include some of the reception rituals (well, the gorgeous cake anyway) without letting people know ahead of time that we're celebrating our wedding. A related question: since the wedding will be very small and won't include extended family, and since the extended family won't be invited to the west coast party (they don't live nearby), is it proper to send out wedding announcements to extended family? Alternatively, is it proper to not send out announcements to anyone not at the ceremony or the party, and assume that extended family will hear of our wedding by word of mouth, annual Christmas letters, etc?

I subscribe to FDA notices regarding drugs....as well as governmental notices regarding food stuffs. Neither are fail safe systems but I can tell you from the number of notices that come to my mailbox that our government is trying. I received a notice this morning reporting a warning about an unsafe drug from India. I get regular [often daily] notices of updated manufacturer/label drug information....OTC as well as prescriptive. And I'm always the first to know about a food product being pulled from shelves. It's not a perfect system but reading all the government internal reports and seeing almost first hand how hard they trying to get control of this issue gives me a more trusting attitude these days. I started this process when my late husband was so ill...and when I saw what hospitals do...and don't do when they should do. To say that I was shocked is putting it mildly. Now...eight years later...much has improved...including hospital protocol. It takes our input to move this process along. We...John Q public...cannot sit back and criticize without actually sticking our two cents in with our representatives. Report...report...report when you see something wrong at a health care facility....when you have a bad reaction to a drug...when you experience a less than acceptable attitude from a clinician or any medico. The squeaky wheel...in this particular field...does get attention and it's not measured by the size of your complaint. I read so many posts here of people who are dissatisfied with a product or a doctor. Don't just post about it here...go to your representatives...local or federal...and make a stink. A BIG one...until you get a reply. Without your input...these representatives can't do the best job for you. You voted them in. Now use them. Do the same with medical boards and manufacturers. [dragging soap box back to its corner]

I have hesitated to join this discussion, as I have shovel pruned so many. I shamefacedly realise just how many, when I come across (often) photos of roses in other's gardens that I used to have. Last year I cut back an enormous Mme Isaac Pereire to a stump, and poisoned it. The blooms were way more sparse than they were, she has every disease known to man and she takes up a lot of real estate. And I get cut to pieces trying to get at other plants. I must be a bad poisoner, as nearly all I have poisoned regrow. Come Spring, so did MIP. But as there were buds, I thought I'd just enjoy them before I had a second go. She started to grow like topsy, and I thought I'll enjoy a few more blooms before I have another go at her. Big mistake. She never had another bloom, but has, in one year, reached her former monstrous size, and I now face the whole prospect again. I'm still thinking I'll wait and see if there's a Spring flush!