This is exactly what I used to do for a living. I was a fundraiser for a hospital that sounds a lot like the one you were in -- new over the top wing. I even looked at your member page to see if it could possibly be the same one. It isn't. Has your mother been making donations to the hospital before her surgery? When a current donor was admitted to the hospital we got an email saying they were there. We would go visit them to say thank you for their support and to be sure to call us if there was anything we could do while they were there. I never talked to anyone who was still woozy from surgery. I often took flowers and left my card so they knew how to reach me. Anyway, fund raising can be sleazy at times. You are always cultivating people in hopes that they will give money. I am glad to be out of it. On the other hand, many people really do care a lot about an organization and it is nice to be able to answer their questions and be sure that their gifts are spent as they want. We also sent letters asking for contributions to nearly everyone who was admitted to the hospital a few weeks after they are discharged.

We have been very lucky, with all of the medical issues we have had with our son. He has been in 5 hospitals, since he was hurt in an industrial accident. That left him a para, and has now had two strokes. We don't live in what would be concidered the hub of medical technology, but I can say in all honesty his care could not have been better. He has had talented, caring, responsive nuring staff, as well as doctors. When they know their limits don't meet his needs, he has been sent out of state to larger facilities. I try to work WITH the staff, because he is unable to communicate very well. I am not a medical professional, but over this past 11 years, I certainly have learned and seen a lot. I advocate for Brian, and yes, there have been times I have disagreed with some of the directives, but we discuss them, so we understand each others views. Afterall I have been through it all with him, and he is my only concern, as they have many patients to be concerned about. Being an antagonist helps no one. I keep a notebook with me at all times, so I have some knowledge to speak to staff, if I have a concern. These dedicated professionals, have kept my son alive when several times, there was little hope. Our society has become so angry and rude, it is very sad to see the verbal abuse so many seem to think is OK. I have had staff I cared for more than others, but never felt any of them have not done the best they can for us. His and my ( 2 surgeries this year too) rooms have always been clean, the food is good, not 5 star but good and usually there are choices so you should be able to find something satisfactory. I thank you ladies, and any men if it applies, for your dedication to your patients. Its a big job, that I for one appreciate. I wish more of you could feel the same. Makes me want to never relocate.

I really don't expect people to "remodel" just for me. I have a set of toilet arm rails that I take with me if I am going to be visitng overnight. They involve some mechanics to install safely, so it isn't practical to do just for a few hours. I have 4 neighbors that I visit with a lot out in our yards and on my porch during fit weather but in the 9 years I have lived here, I have never been into their homes because of steps with no railings. Up till about 5 years ago, if the steps had a railing on each side I could with help get up them. No more. It seems that a lot of people don't think about getting older when building a home. Wheelchairs need 36"inch doorways and the arthritic knees and hips of old age don't go with the standard height commodes. Steps without railings are just insane for even sound bodies. As wildchild noted, a firm straight chair with arms is a good thing to have. Don't seat an older or physically infirm person in "your most comfortable" chair, because it is very likey squishy soft and too low for them to get back out of. Here is a tip that will help greatly for someone who has difficulty with a few steps. At the top, say on a porch post, or at the side of the door install a handle like a "C" shaped drawer pull (like used to be on all wood screen doors) Have the person who needs help present so it can be positioned where they need it. Being able to 'pull' oneself up the steps is a very big help. The handle along with one rail helped me up the two 4 inch steps into our last home for several years.

Chisue - I've been following this thread wondering whether or not to post but your most recent post sent me dashing to my computer. I am so sorry you are going through this pain and frustration with our medical system. The reason I hesitate to make a comment is that I am not clear as to what is causing your sciatica. Well, if it is sciatica we can pretty much narrow it down to some issue in your L-1 through L-5 joints or possibly your s-1 or s-2 joints. But I am not clear what is causing the pain. Is it a herniated disc, spinal stenosis, tumor or ?? Did you get a diagnosis via MRI? Was is caused by the bone chip on your hip? Please ask these questions and get an MRI if you haven't already done so. After a fall, I had sciatica pain from my buttocks to my little toe. The first thing they did was an MRI to determine the actual cause of the problem (it was herniated disc). Then I was referred to an orthopedic you-guessed-it surgeon. My preference was PT, not surgery. After doing a LOT of research, and because mine was a herniated disc, I found a PT who was trained in the Mckenzie Technique. The exercises were almost impossible for me to perform because I was in such bad condition. After my insurance PT was over, with not much progress, I had no choice but to continue the exercises on my own since I still wasn't healed and was being considered for surgery. My next stop was a Physiatrist. Lots of heat, cold, electrical stimulation. Nothing helped. Then they suggested an epidural steroid injection and surgery was not off the table. This is not just a regular shot. The total injection time is about 20-30 minutes. They inject the steroid into the sacroiliac joint until you feel pressure. Then they stop and let the steroid dissipate before they push in more steroid. This goes on for 3 or 4 "pushes", maybe more. You are hooked up to an IV and they use fluoroscopy to assist with real time images. After the shot I went home and laid on my right side (the side with the injury) and hardly moved throughout the day. Docs won't tell you to do this, I read it on Dr. Internet. I am so grateful that one shot got me to the point to where I was able to continue physical therapy exercises on my own and push through to pretty good health. I occasionally get "back issues" and will get down on the floor and do the exercises. I can go years without an issue although I do have to be careful to support my lower back with a pillow, particularly if I sit in a chair that is too deep. And a strong core is key. So please: 1. get a diagnosis as to the specific cause of your sciatica: 2. Look up McKenzie technique and find a trained therapist in this method: (I have no investment in this therapy). 3. look into seeing a Physiatrist for your an epidural steroid shot. Depending on your diagnosis, my experience may or may not help you. One last thing I will say. During my recovery I had a business flight to Maui and sat next to the head Orthopedist for Shriner's Children's Hospital. She told me I had to break the cycle of pain. I was only taking ibuprofen at night in low doses. No. She told me I needed to take therapeutic doses throughout the day. I know you can't take this med but I want to pass this info along. She said once you have inflammation, the nerves send a pain message to your brain and then, when you brain senses pain, it sends inflammatory messages to the area of pain. So it becomes a vicious circle. Cycle. The important thing is to break the cycle of pain. I hope I haven't provided any medical misinformation. I know there are GWers who have medical knowledge so please correct me if I misspoke medially in this post. Also, this whole event was many many years ago and I am going from memory. Although my memory of the events is still vivid, I just may have a few medical details off. Sorry for this long post. Best of luck to you, Chisue.