My dad passed on 6-22-06, HELP!
hwings
17 years ago
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nikkiandjacksmom
17 years agoladonna
17 years agoRelated Discussions
My dad recently passed away
Comments (4)I am so sorry for your loss. Its a little crazy to say those words to you because I thought I would flip out as people said that to me at the funeral home on the night of my Dad's viewing. People kept saying I am sorry for your loss... I finally said to someone, for Gods sake he isnt lost he's dead!I did quiet a bit of flipping out in the first few months after he died. It was sudden even though he was dying of lung cancer. One morning he woke up early as always and told my sister he wanted eggs for breakfast and she helped him get on the potty chair and then went to start his breakfast, she popped her head back in the living room a few seconds later to see if he was done on the potty and he was dead. His heart just stopped. I still talk to my Dad. I look at his pictures and I pour my heart out just like if he was in the room with me. I have a deep and abiding faith that there is an after life, that there is a spirit world where we are reunited with our loved ones. I was on chemo therapy when he died. I also was in college. I took a week off at first and since we were past spring break I did my best to finish up the semester. I only dropped one class. I wish I had not dropped the class. I tried to go back the next semester but even with a very light load it was emotionally too much. Its been two years since he died. I am planning to return to school in january 2010. You are not 'the man of the house'. You may be the only male or the oldest male but your Dad was the man of the house and its just too much preasure to on you. Be a great big brother to your sister, allow yourself to feel what you really feel. Let her see your grief when it comes. Remember the good times together and tell 'Dad' stories. Laugh as much as you can. My sister moved in with my Momma after Dad passed. She would rent really funny movies to show Momma. My Mom's favorite movie was 'white chicks'. Isn't that a hoot? This dignified (almost) 77 year old woman getting histerical over white chicks? It still cracks me up to remember it. Do things to celebrate his life. Plant a tree, or donate a bench to a park in his name. There are lots of things you can do on very little money to remember him. I planted a 'forgivness garden' right after we found out he was dying of cancer. I was told this by a friend from church: "Never forget that your Father is with his Father in heaven now. He is surronded my loving relatives who have waited a long time for his return." Your Dad is too. Hey, maybe they even know each other??? Try a grief support group. I still go to one sponcered by the hospice that took care of my both of my parents. God bless you, you will survive this. I promise. Heavenly Father will NEVER put more on you than you can bare up under. Keep posting on this site too. It helps. Vicki...See MoreMy dad passed away
Comments (9)I know that I should not hold him at fault, and I don't completely. I know that all the things took time, I just don't understand why he couldn't have just called 911 right then instead of going nextdoor to ask what they thought. And it's not only that he didn't really seem sad hardly at all. My dad had been taking pain killers for many years because he had broken his neck around 1980 and it would still give him pain, he had become addicted to them. A couple of days later we found a whole bottle hidden in my uncles car that were my dads and I know that my dad would not have given them away thats for sure. I can promise that(my dads family has a way of trying to deal with things through alcohol and drugs). And also my dad didn't have one dollar on him and that is unexplanable, my dad always had money on him, always. I don't want to accuse him of stealing from his dead brother, but fact is he is a bum and had been there mooching off my dad for weeks, he had been staying with friends in another town and they had to tell him to leave because he was stealing from them so I wouldn't put it past him. All in all he is my uncle and I love him still and if anything like this did happen I will leave it in gods hands. What I ment when I said that my husband tells me to try not to think about it, was that I will sometimes listen to songs that remind me of him and I will look at his pictures and I will just cry so much, and he tells me that I am making myself more sad by doing that. He has been very wonderful with helping me grieve. We have a 3 year old little girl and she misses her grandpa too very much, she will upset and tell me is sad, I will ask her whats wrong and she will say "I miss pops" thats what she called him. It makes me really sad too when she tells me that. I have always been afraid of those late night calls, I would think about how I would feel if someone close to me died, I never imagened that my dad would go He had always been such a strong man. I think about it still so much almost like it's not real I mean my dad, my dad, he's not just a phone call away anymore or a two hour drive. I really appreciate all of your advice so much, it really helps alot. Thank you all so very much. God Bless...See MoreMy dad's brother passed away
Comments (12)Hi kath, I'm sorry that your Dad has this heartache to deal with, but without his brother recognizing him, it's been a problem for a time and this will put an end to that ongoing heartache. I hope that you can call and talk frequently for the next while - does he have skype or an equivalent? It would likely be helpful if he could see your face, especially moving. Sorry as well that your family has had these disruptions: it's best to get such issues resolved: life is too short for us to let ourselves become prisoners of such issues to the point that it causes a rupture in our relations with out family - our supposed-to-be loved ones. (((((kathsgrdn and bereft family))))) ole joyful...See MoreLayout help - My Mom and Dad's Kitchen
Comments (8)doesn't appear the microwave location will really allow a fridge. I think I'd show them/encourage them to get a french door/bottom freezerdrawer fridge...[cabinet depth]and center it in the brick arch.I think they'd love it. Move the range over to the opposite wall and probably get above range microwave unless they are opposed to that. The area of microwave with the bulletin board/catch alls and papers/etc looks about18-21 in deep and 30 in wide. do something there with tall storage/perhaps with a bit of counter for toaster/coffee pot. if they'd want to keep a microwave there then create a niche at 54 in up from floor and you can still have counter for the other small things. there's a lot you can offer with vertical tall storage. With fridge only in the arch,you'd have some counter to the right for breadmaker to sit-it'll be displaced from it's corner if range moves across.You have a soffitt-do you have a goal of removing? Above the range, at least aim for a recirculating fan but perhaps a real hood could be vented up and then sideways out[but maybe not]....See Moresisrl
17 years agolulie___wayne
17 years agohwings
17 years ago
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