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Writing a condolence card

16 years ago

I have bought the card, and mulled over the words to put into it. It is for a lady who lost her husband,he was 79.

I know them quite well, and the husband was such a lovely,kind, funny, thoughtful person. We worked together as volunteers, once a month for many years, so I got to know him quite well.

In the card I want to say something positive..not the "so sad for your loss" words. I want to convey words of hope, something like "I will come around and help you in the garden" sort of thing.

I just can't formulated the words...can you give me some ideas ?

Thanks everyone.

Popi

Comments (6)

kayjones
16 years ago
Popi, you said everything you need to say in your post!

Dear ......,
I have come to know both of you quite well, and wanted to say that I thought your husband (or his name) was such a lovely, kind, funny, thoughtful person. We worked together as volunteers, once a month, for many years, so I got to know him quite well. I treasure the time we spent together!

I would love to spend some time with you, too - please allow me to come and help you in the garden.

Then give her your name and phone number, so she can call you when she's ready to spend time with you.
popi_gw
Original Author
16 years ago
Many thanks, Kayjones, you have helped me clarify my words!

I will put pen to card today.

Thanks again.

Popi
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The exact same type of death happened recently in our town. Our BFF's daughter who comes over all the time, lost her DH in a wreck on the way to work. He was in his 30's, left behind his wife and young son. They also lost their firstborn at 18mos. So you can imagine the sadness. With this being a small town we all gathered around her and her son, who is BFF's with my grandson. Food, someone spent the night with her all the time, lots of flowers, and several funds. We donated money, but what everyone needs to remember is she and her son need to feel the love, even if they're over flowing in food and flowers. Many take some food and flowers home, but at least she and her son saw how loved they are. I think your neighbor is feeling the love which I'm sure is helping right now. I wouldn't stress about it. It's a good thing.
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kayjones
16 years ago
Popi, I am sorry you lost your dear friend, but hopefully, his wife will be your new best friend!
popi_gw
Original Author
16 years ago
Thanks Kay

I have sent the card, a recycled paper card, as he was an environmentalist. He used to ride his bike to the shops, along busy roads, because he didnt want to burn fossils fuels. He also got solar panels on his roof, for their hot water needs. Such a wonderful person...I feel quite sad that I won't see him any more, but I guess its worse for his wife and children. He was one of those rare people who showed an interest in others and didn't talk about themselves the whole time. A charming man.

They had the funeral in their back yard because he didn't like funeral directors.

He brings a smile to my face, and always will.

Thanks again Kay, for your interest.

Popi
kayjones
16 years ago
Popi, what a lovely friendship - I know he will live on in your memory forever. That friendship and love is to be desired by EVERYONE!
angela59
15 years ago
Popi, I'm also sorry for your loss.......the only other thing I would suggest is not to wait for her to call you since people in grief often don't reach out and often don't want to bother others (because in their minds, they think they are).......you might want to give her a month and contact her, she would probably really appreciate that!

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