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over powered by step gandma

Posted by ldgrandma (My Page) on
Tue, Dec 22, 09 at 15:44

I was wondering if anyone else has felt this way or it is just me? I am constantly second fiddle when it comes to family gatherings and the such! When my daughter had her baby she just wanted my son in law and me in the room with her. Well, my husbands new wife barges in and pushes me out of the way, I did not say anything just stood by her to be near to my daughter, after my daughter told me she was upset and that is just how she is! I could go on and on but it just hurts so much. I love that little man so much but, it is like she does not want me to exist. To make it more difficult I live out of state, I could not make it for his birthday,but sent some nice gifts to him. This women seems to "out do" me when it comes to my grandson. I am just so hurt by all of this. Has anyone else out their ever gone through anything like this?

Follow-Up Postings:

RE: over powered by step gandma

This kind of thing happens *all the time*, so it isn't anything you've done or anything that reflects on you;
yet a troublemaker like this can cause a great deal of damage & heartache.

Keep close to your daughter, see the little one when you can, smile, ignore the nonsense.

I wish you the best.

RE: over powered by step gandma

I have a question---- Why did you step back when your husbands wife barrelled in. I would have pushed my way back in and said politely--This is MY daughter and I will be by her side. With pushy people you have to push back. You can do it without rancor or harsh words, but do it in a firm manner that leaves no doubt where you stand. Of course she doesn't want you to exist, but you do and you should let her know it.

You have something that this woman doesn't have--a history with your grandsons mother. Tell him stories of when his mother was little. All little kids like to hear stories about their parents.

Although I don't have your problem, I do live a distance from my grandsons. I do talk to them often on the phone. If you can afford it, get webcams for your daughter and you. Then you can see your grandson and he can see you.

Do something special for your grandson that reminds him of you. I made my grandsons books on the computer. I started it--once upon a time in the small town of ----lived a beautiful young girl named---. I went on to tell how their parents met and how they were born. All suitable to a small child. I embellished it with clip art and photos and I put all in a small photo album.

My grandsons love their own books and show them off all the time and they know they were made by me. If you look for it there are lots of things you can do that are special just between you and your grandson. Gifts are not everything.

If you want the full story book I wrote for my grandsons. send me an e-mail and I'll send it to you

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