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estrangement/how to make amends
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Posted by dixiedoll (My Page) on Fri, Aug 28, 09 at 17:34
My son is an addict. He and his wife are now divorced.
His addiction was well hidden and my husband and I paid for three rehabs to help him and one halfway house so I feel we tried to help. My son has a little boy that is three. He is our only grandchild. Along the way on this journey of addiction things were said by everyone. Many feelings were hurt.
We did the best we could to help the former dil financially
but she considered it to be controlling even though she took the money we offered. She has since told me that she doesn't want me around my grandson . There are just so many, many hurt feelings.
My son and I are estranged because he has relapsed.
Is there any way you can think of that amends can be made on my part to her? She will not speak to me or acknowledge me whatsoever.
There are far to many details to go into. I just wonder if a rift such as this can ever be corrected.
My grandson, at age three, does not know me even though we live in the same town. I have offered to babysit but I have been told not to "volunteer". That I need to be asked.
That is the temperature of the relationship.
Thanks for any input.
dixie |
Follow-Up Postings:
RE: estrangement/how to make amends
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| Personally I would not make any overtures toward them. If you call them and it causes problems, you are just adding fuel to the fires. This what a counselor told one of our family members. Just back off and find your self something to do that takes your mind off your situation. I would never let anyone know how much they had hurt me. |
RE: estrangement/how to make amends
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| This girl will take advantage no matter what you do. I understand about your grandson--it would kill me not to see mine. Your daughter-in-law sounds like a taker and even if you grovelled to her there is no guarantee that would give you more access to the boy. |
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