I really need some ideas! Thanks!

They are over 75 and are well off. They have a nice home that they are in the process of updating, two cars, and they spend 5 months every winter in warmer climates. They just seem to have everything, and I can't think of a single idea that the rest of the family doesn't shoot down.

Last night, I saw a vintage wine that's about $600 and a light bulb went off. It sounds like the stupidest anniversary gift ever, but I just don't have a clue.

Since I posted two days ago and received no suggestions, it looks like no one else has any ideas either! Who ever invented this gift-giving tradition anyway?! LOL

As you say, they don't need anything, then give them something that can be used up, like the wine. It won't have to be displayed or dusted. That's the kind of gift I like. (and if they don't like it, they can pour it down the sink, you'll never know!)

Along the same lines as the question you asked about "whoever invented the gift-giving tradition?", I ask "whatever happened to giving a special gift from the heart and the recipient graciously accepting it?".

I think if you have a good idea for a gift (the clock, trip and family portrait are great ideas!), go ahead and do that. It sounds like you're starting to think that any idea you have will be "shot down". Go with your heart, and if they are really nice people they will appreciate whatever you do for them.

They are great at shooting down an idea and not giving any good ones. Most of them bought their gifts without sharing ideas; but 4 of them are daughters, so they know exactly what to get (just like I have no trouble buying for my mom and dad). The two sons (I should say daughters-in-law) haven't a clue.

I would give a special gift from the heart, but the thing is, my heart doesn't belong to them so I can't think of anything "special," nor are gifts graciously accepted on their part, so I guess both sides are guilty.

A gold clock they already have. 15 years of marriage into that family and I had no idea! (they keep it in a box in the basement).
The trip is no good because they won't go anywhere. They are 75 and 79 (I think) and they think any day is going to be "it" and they want to be home when "it" happens. The only reason they spend winters in Florida is because they think they will freeze to death here in Michigan! They won't even go for a weekend to any of their kids' homes for a visit because they'd rather sleep in their own bed.

The family portrait idea is no good because "family photos are out." Can you believe that one!!?? You will not find one single photo of themselves, their children or their grandchildren on display in their house - "it's tacky."

I would normally just buy something I thought was appropriate and not say a word, but I'm tired of going through the gymnastics of returning things and trying to think of something else because they "surely can't be expected to take the money in lieu!"

I still suggest buying something YOU think would be a good gift and let them be the ones to return it if they don't like/need/want it. If they or someone suggests it needs to be returned, don't offer to do it. The burden is on THEM to graciously accept a gift and if they can't do that, they need to figure out what else to do with it. That is the only proper way to receive a gift.

Another suggestion would be a gift certificate for a restaurant they like to go to.

As far as the gift idea......I was on a tight budget when my parents had their anniversary, but I truely gave from the heart. I purchased a large wicker basket, lined it with gold foil type tissue paper. I made a gift basket with a gold candle, 2 wine glasses with champayne, cheese and gourmet crackers, CD, bubble bath (Mom giggled) and a copy of their wedding certificate rolled up like a scroll (it was still on microfilm in SC where they got married)

Just cater to their tastes. If they are into art, give them a gift certificate to an Art Gallery (or pick one out yourself if you feel brave enough) If their health is good maybe contact a Travel Agency for travel ideas. Do they have a special charity they give too (sometimes those with money like donations being made in their name) or given to a church. Get romantic and have a star named after them.
Good luck and here's the link for the White House. Gail

A framed collage photo of their memories or one of them today, their wedding picture and all the grandkids. You can have a photographer do it or do it yourself with a program like Picassa--free on line.

Tickets--to a concert, play,dinner theater or sporting event--you know their tastes. If they don't drive you might offer to go with them or include a limo or taxi as part of the gift.

Spa passes or just coupons for hair cuts and dos.

If they are tea lovers a few packets of assorted exotic teas or coffee lovers --the same.

Have the kids make something to include. If they are like me, my greatest treasures come from my grandkids.

I'm sure if you sat down and thought about what they do, what they like and what their interests are, there are dozens of things you could come up with.

Whatever you do DO NOT run it by your sisters-in-law. Make up or get your gift and if they ask say I haven't decided yet. If you let your heart lead you, you can't go wrong

Good luck

I do have a suggestion for the group - My mom made a cross-stitch blanket that is hanging above my grandparents' bed for one of their anniversaries. It's basically a family tree and includes a square for each person - My mom stiched i.e. "John" (son) and his birthdate and then "Jane" (wife) and her birthdate, and in between the two - their wedding anniversary date. And then below John and Jane are the three kids and their birthdates. In each person's square she stitched a little item that represents that person - like my square has a piano because I play piano... my cousin's has a baseball, etc. It was VERY well received and it's perfect because we know how when you get old you are very good at forgetting dates!

I thought this was the best gift idea ever and it was very well received. And every time a new family member is added, my Mom just updates the blanket....

The problem is now, we have their 50th anniversary coming up and this past anniversary gift is going to be very hard to top.

Happy Anniversary to your grandparents

That said, Joyce, I think you don't have to make a donation or anything else. In fact, it sounds as though anyone not giving a gift would be the only one doing as the couple asked. But if you feel you must, I like your idea. And as far as the wine goes, I'd suspect that, given the situation of the couple, nice wines have been specifically chosen for the event. Yours might be put away to be enjoyed later.

We basically reached out to all the friends and family we could think of and asked them to dial a toll-free number. All the recordings were put together onto a keepsake CD.

Joyce, it sounds like the couple is very off and don't want gifts - but this more celebrates the relationship they have with loved ones. On the other hand, if you don't know them well, you may feel more comfortable collaborating with one of their children on this.

Everyone called in with their favorite memories and stories of my parents, and we presented all the recordings . Everyone got a hold of their address book, and contacted