Haven't done the "The World Of War Craft," yet, but that may come. Our GS is 6+ and he is into "Angry Bird", so he'll get some of that, then there are Lego "Action Figures", it's not your father's Legos.We are trying to keep up with the current 6+ age group, and so far we seem to be doing well, because he want's to visit. He also likes working with the ipod mini, that we bought for our daughter for christmas. We also play soft ball in the back yard, go to the local park in his "red wagon". We try to incorporate the new with the traditional.

For those of you who replied, Talk to the mother, Try an open some form of ommunication and trust and then on top of that you suggest the Grandparents stay in town while they see the child. Motel rooms, meals, it takes money for that. Getting back to talking to the mother, some of you mothers out there have NO idea of what you are saying. There are those of us grandparents who as try as hard as we can to talk to the mothers, they just don't listen. they want to hurt the grandparents and they use the children to do it. I'm one of those grandparents who loves her grandson with all my heart and he loves his grandparents equally, but his mother has an anger issue and its impossible to talk to her. And currently the boys father is actively seeking his rights as his father to see him. She hates the childs father with a passion and the child loves his father with equal passion. You women who talk the talk right now. I hope and pray that when your children grow up and they marry and have children and something should happen divorce, death of a parent that you don't find your own self is a situation like yourself. No matter how hard you try now, you can not forsee your future. Set aside your opinion now and take a look at the love these grandparents have for their grandchildren and just pray you get lucky in the future and YOU never have to go through what we go through right now.

In the past when things came up I have told her directly but....things never worked out and ended in months in her not speaking to me or being very cold. I learned it best to just keep quiet on the small things and let it pass. The first time I talked to dad on the phone I thought it was good he answered as he could act as a buffer. That mom would be more understanding if it came from him. Maybe Karenmi was right in saying he didn't want to make waves, that is why he never passed on the message. I now see it was my responsibility to tell mom directly and not cop out and have someone else do it. As far as the phone conversation with the kids, I think it's about time I stood up to her and this is how I will handle it. When she calls and wants to talk to one of the kids I will tell her that she can but I don't appreciate her lying to the GK's about the situation and it's not going to be tolerated anymore, therefore I will be on the phone listening in as a monitor. If malicious things are said to the kids then the phone privalige is over and she can write letters. Even though I won't like to invade my kids privacy by listening in I don't want to draw them into this battle by questioning them what was said. Plus if I explain it to them I don't think there will be a problem. My oldest daughter is already running out of the room when she sees Mom in one of her moods (permament PMS). Truthfully, I'd be glad to wash my hands of the whole situation and if it weren't for the GK's I would sever all contact with her (her 2 sisters and brother haven't spoke to her since she got married and moved out of the house so I guess it's a family affair). On a closing note this is one of the 'small things' that was overlooked. Even my dad was upset with mom and I've only seen him mad once before. In hindsite I should have taken more of a stand but I think it would've ended up the same: One X-mas they were visiting. I rarely spanked my daughter (son a baby at the time) and my husband never did as he was abused and very uncomfortable with the idea. Our style was going to the corner or a time out. Anyway, all we ever heard was how my daughter spends her life in the corner and 'what kind of a mother are you'? One time my husband told my mom that our daughter made him so mad he wanted to spank her, but he didn't. At this Mom shoved him by the shoulders and he fell onto the couch. She then got within 2 inches of his nose and said if he ever touched her grandchildren she would kill him and then take custody away from me. At that point dad stepped in and led her away. Dad thought it was best to get mom out of the house so they packed and left. Damn if you do and damn if you don't.

From the Indiana Code: IC 31-17-5-2 Best interest of the child; in chambers interview of the child Sec. 2. (a) The court may grant visitation rights if the court determines that visitation rights are in the best interests of the child. (b) In determining the best interests of the child under this section, the court may consider whether a grandparent has had or has attempted to have meaningful contact with the child. (c) The court may interview the child in chambers to assist the court in determining the child's perception of whether visitation by a grandparent is in the best interests of the child. (d) The court may permit counsel to be present at the interview. If counsel is present: (1) a record may be made of the interview; and (2) the interview may be made part of the record for purposes of appeal. As added by P.L.1-1997, SEC.9. Amended by P.L.15-2004, SEC.3. IC 31-17-5-3 Petition Sec. 3. A proceeding for grandparent's visitation must be commenced by the filing of a petition entitled, "In Re the visitation of _________". The petition must: (1) be filed by a grandparent entitled to receive visitation rights under this chapter; (2) be verified; and (3) set forth the following: (A) The names and relationship of: (i) the petitioning grandparent or grandparents; (ii) each child with whom visitation is sought; and (iii) the custodial parent or guardian of each child. (B) The present address of each person named in clause (A). (C) The date of birth of each child with whom visitation is sought. (D) The status under section 1 of this chapter upon which the grandparent seeks visitation. (E) The relief sought. I'm in the very early stages of this process in NJ. Indiana has a portion of the code that is very wise: the child may be interviewed and asked if he/she wants to see the grandparents! New Jersey doesn't have that. You're fortunate in that your grandchildren are older and able to speak for themselves. Mine are only 3 and 5 and as my attorney advised me there's usually no history from a child wherein he/she might have expressed a meaningful desire to see the grandparents. In NJ, the court can order visitation even though the family is intact, which my daughter's is - it's just extremely dysfunctional, with abuse, big-time anger problems, gender identity issues, denial and depression all going on. The parents deal with problems with other family members not by addressing them but by telling the family member that they cannot see the grandchildren, i.e., if you don't do such-and-such because I demand it, you won't be able to see the children. Or, because you said such-and-such about my spouse you cannot see the grands. Lots of emotional abuse, brainwashing and isolating going on. My attorney has advised that we will proceed to focus on the dysfunctionality in pressing our case to be allowed visitation, i.e., the parents cannot make healthy reasoned decisions.