Financial arrangement when parents move in?
MagdalenaLee
9 years ago
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rosefolly
9 years agomaifleur01
9 years agoRelated Discussions
Tell me your thoughts on: When a Parent KNOWS they have Alzheimer
Comments (26)With the "privacy laws" lots has changed! And, lets not forget the ungrateful idiots that have wiped out their parents savings with POA's. That is what has caused so many changes. I am getting through all this and am very lucky my dad can still sign. Most of the money is in his name so I can get it out to pay mom's nursing home bills, but it has been a challenge! I now have it all worked out so should not have too many more hassles. Our investment guy told me today that I am not the only one complaining about the mountain of paperwork that needs to be done to take care of parents! LOL! Some thing our attorney adviced me to do also was to change the primary benificiary on my dad's IRA's. That way if, heaven forbid, some thing happens to him the remainder of the money will not go to the nursing home for my mom's care. Makes sense and that way I will have a few pennies to take care of my brother and his special wants. Oh, that is some thing else, we also have it set up in the will that when my parents are gone my brothers share will go in to a trust for him, therefore keeping it out of the hands of the nursing home....See MoreSon's inability to deal with financial things
Comments (19)My son is 20 years old and will be a junior this fall. He is very organized and responsible, and he still ran up substantial banking fees. He misunderstood and thought the automatic transfers from savings to checking were free. Anyway, here are my suggestions. First, check with the college - it's possible all the university fees, etc. can be paid online. At my son's school, students have an online account that can be used to pay for tuition, housing, parking, all school fees, meal plans, and even books (if they're purchased at the university bookstore). My son gives me his account number and password and I pay for everything but his meals and spending money online. As far as apartment rent is concerned, you could either pay that yourself, force your son to live on campus, or tell him he has to live at home if he can't manage manage his money. At my son's college, most kids live on campus so all their housing is prepaid. I love this arrangement. If my son runs out of money, then he still has a dorm roof over his head, his tuition and books are already paid. If he runs out of money, then he can't go out with his friends or he has to eat peanut butter and ramen noodle soup - so it's not my problem if he mismanages his money. Some other thoughts - some kids do better if they have less free time on their hands rather than more. My son's lowest GPA was the semester he had a lot of free time. He had a lot of time for fun and got distracted. He is much more focused if he's busy. So perhaps your son might do better if he had a part time job? Also, some kids do much better if they have to pay for part of their school themselves, not just spending money. If you feel that part of your son's problem is immaturity, you might look into something like Americorps. We have some friends whose son seemed a little immature to me, and their son spent a year in Americorps before college. He matured a lot while in that program, and is now doing fine and attending college in California and doing well. Perhaps a year off in a structured program might help. I know opinions may differ on this, but to me, teenagers going off to college, incurring some bank fees, running of money, etc. - those are part of the learning experience for many teens. As long as it's not a chronic problem, I don't worry about it. Whatever mistakes my son made, he's mostly worked and paid me back for any extra expense (he has the blisters on his hands this summer to prove it). And he didn't keep making the same mistakes over and over - he learned from each mistake the first time, fixed it and moved on. I say prepay all his important expenses, and if he runs out of money and has to eat ketchup and crackers then so be it. If he doesn't learn from that, then maybe he needs to live at home. I hope you and your son find something that works well for you....See MoreSo when you are ready to move to your new home...
Comments (18)I second getting the floors done before you move in. I wish we had done that in our tv room. The carpeting is 10 year old builder's grade stuff with a couple stains on it. We didn't care when we bought because we knew we'd be upgrading the carpet in a couple years once are kids are less likely to spill stuff on it. Well, now we have a HUGE entertainment center with a projection tv in that room, and there's no WAY that thing will be moving anytime soon. Which means no redoing that carpet until we move out of the house. Fortunately, we can recarpet the stairs and second floor (which is that same 10 year old builder's grade), and figure we'll just give a carpet allowance for the TV room to the buyers we sell to in the future. As for paint, I recommend waiting until you are in the house. In our old house, we lived with the nasty wallpaper until we decided what we wanted to do in each room, and then we tackled stripping the wallpaper and painting. We did a room every few months until it was all done....See MoreThings to Do For Elderly Parents When You Visit for the Holidays
Comments (16)I think others covered a lot but you say" over Christmas" so are there beds to be made up, linens to be washed, bathroom to be spruced up, fridge needing to be cleaned out, especially of outdated bottles & food in containers. Cooking for elderly doesn't have to be difficult. I often buy a couple of yams & cook in microwave(wash & poke skin with fork in several places so doesn't explode) when done cool yams & cut in serving size pieces (I remove skin but some like it) & put in sandwich bags(kind that just fold over & put in Ziploc bag & label with date & what is in the bag. I store, yams, green beans, squash, bread stuffing, etc & I never thaw anything out. I make soups & put in small round margarine tubs each holds 1 cup (So leave a little space so doesn't boil over when you make them up)so take lid off to side(so just partly covered) & reheat about 3 1/2 minutes. Chili same way, yams couple of slices about 1 minute(microwaves vary) just add butter to serve. I make a meatloaf in a 9x5 loaf pan & freeze slices in amount I think I will eat in sandwich bags & then in Ziploc bag & can have hot meatloaf sandwich in 1 minute or meatloaf, yams, green beans in about 3 minutes. it's very easy to eat well. Leftover steak from eating out, bring it home & pkg it in sandwich bags & in Ziploc bag for 1 or2 meals in few days. Couldn't eat that big baked potato, cut it in sizes you will eat at 1 time & slip in sandwich bags, zip loc bag& freeze, I simply fold over the sandwich bags or twist & fold over before putting in freezer Ziploc bags. Can use cheaper Zip loc type bags or wash & reuse, throw out the sandwich bags after food is heated. Use Sharpie pen to label Zip loc bags & use up foods in couple of months to 6 months. Spaghetti mixed with sauce & meat, macaroni, casseroles, scalloped potatoes & ham, all freeze great in single serving sandwich bags & reheat in microwave in about 3-4 minutes at most. I did this for my folks for years. If you can't cook & like something like hamburger helper made it up & freeze. I cook chicken breasts & use half of them for sandwiches & rest becomes chicken soup, so make ways to make it, with noodles, rice, cook bag of mixed veggies up in microwave & add whole thing including water you cooked veggies in &add seasonings, can add low sodium tomatoes from can of tomato sauce, mushrooms from can or barley etc. Lots of choices. Anyway hope you are well armed with ideas to make things go smoother. Merry Christmas to All!...See MorePhoneLady
9 years agomarie_ndcal
9 years agoPhoneLady
9 years agoElmer J Fudd
9 years agoMagdalenaLee
9 years agoElmer J Fudd
9 years agoemma
9 years ago
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