| In many jurisdictions a marriage voids any former wills. Around here, they advertise mail-order will kits on the radio for something like $39.95. One might use something like that, or one in a book from a publisher like Self-Counsel Press, available in many bookstores, as a guide regarding the many issues that a will relates to. I like the latter, for it would give one a much fuller explanation of the issues involved. Go to a major library and check out resources there, especially ones that are current and related to your jurisdiction. Talk to some trusted friends and ask what procedure they followed, if you think adviseable. Plus some friends, etc. who went through the liquidation of an estate ... but not one that was recent, please, unless you are sure that there were no complications, and minimal residual bereavement issues on the part of the loved ones. Especially good if you can find someone who has been executor of an estate: they have a wealth of knowledge - and much good advice. Do you know some people who have some knowledge in that field? Maybe pick their brains. Do you have a connection with a religious or educational agency? Community or seniors' group? Someone there might have some general ideas to offer. It might make a useful topic for discussion in a seniors', community or church group. I just suggested to the minister of my church this morning that it might be useful to have an evening of discussion about money management, tax implications, etc. and she was interested - also may include our church's local giving co-ordinator (that attends our church). If you'd followed up on my Chrismas gift offered in this and related sites in recent years, you'd have a data base to whom you might choose to send a message covering various aspects of your current dilemma. See it a few pages down on "Money Saving Tips" - or I can send it, if you ask. I think it wise, however, when you have some definite ideas of the issues, and have made specific decisions about what things you want done, to run the situation past a lawyer, possibly having them draw the will. If many of the issues have been considered and decided, so it's largely a matter of drawing the will correctly, the fees usually aren't large ... likely a few hundred dollars. If the lawyer has to spend a lot of time explaining, discussing various options, etc. with clients discussing in that office, the bill can get high. You have made no reference to how long you've been married, the ages of your children, how many assets either of you brought into the marriage, etc. However, it seems to be a bit unfair that, should you both depart this life together (rather improbable), your together one kid gets half of the assets ... and his 3 kids brought into your marriage from earlier get to split the other half. Should you depart first, and, as you say, all of the assets go to him, then when he dies, how will he split the stuff between the four (well, four as of this writing, anyway). Does he have a concern that, should he die first, on your demise, your kid may get most of the assets, while his imported ones end up with not much? Has it been decided as to who gets what of which assets (house, car 1, car 2, retirement savings, other assets, etc. Some assets, e.g. life insurance, tax-deferred retirement fund, etc. can have a beneficiary designated, so that fund may not be included in the will, thus attract probate fees. For example, in this area, if a couple had a home worth $200,000. and a tax-deferred retirement fund of $200,000. and left one kid the home and the other the retirement asset, there'd be a major problem. The owner-occupied home passes to the estate free of tax on whatever capital gain may have accrued. The tax-deferred retirement fund was not taxed as income when earned, so, unless bequeathed to a spouse, becomes income of the deceased, in addition to whatever other income was received in the year of death ... often resulting in tax load of upwards of 50%. So the kid getting the house gets about $200,000. value ... while the kid getting the retirement fund gets about $100,000., after the estate pays the deceased's taxes relative to the year of death. There are many things to be considered. Also, a related issue ... in case of disability, who gets to make the decisions about medical issues related to the disabled person? What level of extraordinary care to prolong life? Who gets to manage the financial issues related to the disabled person? Do both of you know enough about the whole range of the family's affairs that, should one become disabled/die tomorrow ... the survivor could carry on the various situations of need with minimal disruption (apart from the trauma associated with the illness/death)? That's pretty important, as well. Sorry to give you such a load. ole joyful | 
