Shop Products
Houzz Logo Print
pink_overalls

Welcome lunch for ladies

pink_overalls
14 years ago

I would like to host a small luncheon to welcome a new neighbor. I thought I would pass the idea by her first and if she is comfortable with it, ask about five or six other women neighbors who are friends of mine. I'd like it to be informal, nothing intimidating for her. My dining table is round and would be crowded with seven people, so dining would be buffet-style. I have adequate seating and end tables and such for this kind of service. I'm not very experienced at entertaining, so I have some questions:

How much advance notice is appropriate? Everyone is retired, but busy. Do I have to check with everyone's schedule before finalizing a date?

What would be an appropriate start time? Noon or earlier? Do I specify a end-of-party time on an invitation?

I know invited friends will ask what they can bring, but I like to have complete menu control. I want to be generous, and I want the food to be Just So, as in My Way. What do I politely say to gals who offer to bring something?

The menu might be a variety of three or four pretty, open faced sandwiches, sweet and unsweet iced tea, (I'm in the South, y'all), some fresh fruit, and a watermelon bombe for dessert. Feedback? Should I end with coffee as well?

Are there dietary restrictions I need to accommodate?

I'm happy to get any advice. Thanks.

Comments (9)

  • gellchom
    14 years ago

    It's nice of you to do this for your new neighbor, and I think it's a good idea to float the idea with her first.

    How much advance notice is appropriate?

    A couple of weeks is more than enough, I think.

    Do I have to check with everyone's schedule before finalizing a date?

    I wouldn't, with more than 3 or 4 people. It will probably be impossible to find a date that EVERYONE can make; so be it. Just pick a date that works for the guest of honor and perhaps the woman you most want her to meet, and just go with that.

    What would be an appropriate start time? Noon or earlier?

    It doesn't matter. I'd start at 12 or 1 to give myself more time to get ready. But if for some reason you want to start earlier, say, 11:30, call it brunch.

    Do I specify a end-of-party time on an invitation?
    No.

    I know invited friends will ask what they can bring, but I like to have complete menu control. I want to be generous, and I want the food to be Just So, as in My Way. What do I politely say to gals who offer to bring something?

    DON'T say anything about "just so" or "my way," which suggests that you think they would bring unworthy offerings. I would say, "Not this time, thanks -- but thanks for offering." I have found that people seem to understand when I put it like that and send a written invitation. If someone drives you crazy insisting, ask her to bring ice or borrow her coffee pot or something.

    Should I end with coffee as well?
    I would always offer coffee with lunch, but perhaps you could get away with iced tea instead. What does your group usually do?

    Are there dietary restrictions I need to accommodate?
    If you are asking whether you have to plan a kosher, vegan, salt-free, nut-free, wheat-free, sugar-free, no-carb, lo-fat meal just in case someone MIGHT have a problem -- no, you don't! I would probably ask the guest of honor if she has any restrictions, but after that I wouldn't worry about it. People will just skip the things they can't have for religious, health, or ethical reasons. Don't watch what people eat so you won't feel bad when you see someone not eating one or another thing; it's inevitable, so just don't look and then it won't bother you. But it's too large a group to try to plan a menu that will suit everyone, so don't ask everyone.

    Have a nice party.

  • pink_overalls
    Original Author
    14 years ago

    Thank you, Gellchom. You're the best. Honestly, you could write a book about entertaining.

  • sharon_fl
    14 years ago

    I'd like to suggest something. When the ladies you invite ask what they can bring? Why not tell them you have the luncheon under control but as a surprise for the guest of honor..would you please make your favorite (then you give her a choice of a variety of items..a batch of cookies, a homemade salad or dressings, soup, a casserole ready to be baked, a small meatloaf or chicken dish-etc.) along with the recipe on a card, to give to the honoree. Each guest should put her name & phone number in case of any questions the new neighbor might have about said recipe. This way every neighbor will have welcomed her with a gift from their kitchen!

  • lindac
    14 years ago

    I'd like to second what gellchom said, and add that I would do the invitations by phone. That way you will know immediately if you have chosen a bad date and can re-schedule for another time.
    But as for the foods to be given to the guest of honor....that might be a little overwhelming all at once. How about the recipe on a card and a promise of delivery of a batch of that food later.
    Linda C

  • gellchom
    14 years ago

    I actually love sharonfl's idea -- IF the group will be small; I agree with Lindac that it could be overwhelming if there is too much at one time. A promise to bring it later probably won't be redeemed; I know I would never ask someone to bring me the food they once promised me. If you do this, be sure to find out any food restrictions the recipient has.

    A variation would be a plant from each neighbor's garden to help the new neighbor start her own beds.

    I wish I were invited to this party! It sounds like fun, and I have many neighbors I'd like to know better.

  • eandhl
    14 years ago

    Another thought for other guests is bring a flyer or type one up for various organizations in your community. Particularly ones that each guest may belong to. I would think it would be nice to know of what is available & how to make a contact if was is interested.

  • rivkadr
    14 years ago

    Are there dietary restrictions I need to accommodate?
    If you are asking whether you have to plan a kosher, vegan, salt-free, nut-free, wheat-free, sugar-free, no-carb, lo-fat meal just in case someone MIGHT have a problem -- no, you don't!

    I have to partially disagree with this. You shouldn't have to make everyone happy (you're not a short order cook, after all), but making at least one vegetarian-friendly item would be the hallmark of a good hostess. Vegetarians do make up a decent part of the population (larger if you live in certain communities), and you can also kill two birds with one stone by making something that is friendly to those dieting, like some sort of pasta and veggie salad, as an example.

    It's easy to say, "Well, people will just eat what they can, and avoid what they can't." The problem is that if there's nothing there for vegetarians to eat besides bread rolls, it's a bit of a downer (trust me, I know). And it's not hard for you, as a hostess, to come up with something that fits your overall menu, and is edible for them AND everyone else.

    If you know for a fact that none of your guests are vegetarian, it's a moot point, though.

  • neesie
    14 years ago

    I think gelchom's post hit the nail on the head; very good guidlines for your party. How very nice of you to extend this invitation to your new and existing neighbors. I'd be very flattered if I was the new gal.

    As far as the dietary restrictions, I'm a diabetic and I'd be so uncomfortable if anyone made the menu around ME. I do just look at what's offered and make the best choices. I learned a long time ago that my condition is my own little red wagon that I have to live with. I don't impose on anyone else.

  • gardenlover25
    14 years ago

    You seem a friendly neighbor. How I wish to be one of your neighbors too. If there is dietary restrictions, prepare a meal that is light and would fit to everyone's diet. Thanks.

Sponsored
Fineline Deck Builders
Average rating: 5 out of 5 stars11 Reviews
Women Owned Construction Company Specializing in High Quality Decks