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Tell me I did okay.

Posted by louislinus (My Page) on
Fri, Jul 11, 14 at 21:17

You probably know that we moved about a month ago and have been bleeding money since then. Last week DH and I had a sit down and agreed that we had to stop spending money for awhile. But...I went to an amazing estate sale today and found a rug for our dining room and bought it. :eek! It is a 10x14 all wool chobi rug. The colors are great and work beautifully with our planned dining room decor. They were asking $400 and I got it for $350. Help me rationalize my shopping please! To clarify we don't have a dining room rug for our dining room so it was needed - just bad timing on the finances.

This post was edited by louislinus on Fri, Jul 11, 14 at 21:28


Follow-Up Postings:

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RE: Tell me I did okay.

Yes, you had to buy that. It is perfect for you DR and that is an incredible price Now take a break and enjoy all you have done.
It will give you a chance to savor everything. Your home is lovely and you have great instincts and design sense. I hope you'll be there a long time and will enjoy making it your own for years!


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

I think it's a very handsome rug! I'm looking for one, and would have jumped at this. I love the geo-floral pattern.

Yes, bad timing. But I don't think it was a frivolous purchase if you would have eventually been shopping for a rug. This is a great bargain.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

To ensure you stop spending - STOP GOING TO ESTATE SALES! If you stay away from temptation you don't have to worry about resisting it.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

Lazy gardens - I know! I'm a glutton for punishment. I promise I'm going to stop shopping and set up the things I have before buying any more. New house decorating is just so fun! And so easy to rationalize.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

I love your rug and especially love your tole tray that is propped against the wall. I have a passion for them.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

Holly-Kay - This picture is from the sale so it's not my tray. But now you are making me think I need to go back tomorrow and buy that tray too! :)


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

Oh no! I didn't mean to do that to you but I really do love them.

This is one that I thinks looks great in my kitchen.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

Okay fine I'll go buy it. You win. (lol)


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

It's beautiful. You knew it was right when you saw it. Money is a renewable resource. I think you'll seriously regret not having gotten it.

Sounds like a smart buy.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

LOL!


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

Ya gotta rein it in. There will come a time that you will locate something and you have already purchased something and/or you don't have the money.

Set priorities and make yourself hold to them. It's like drinking alcohol, ya gotta know when to quite.

It's nice, but you need to slap your hands for considering this purchase.

OK...I am off my soapbox. Don't tell the missus that I butted in like this!


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

Love the rug! Wool is so much better than synthetic. If you had gone to a Dept store, you would have paid a LOT more.

holly-kay, I have the exact same tray. Got it at the DC Flea market (really an antiques sale event). It is on a plate stand in my kitchen.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

I would love to see a pic colorcrazy. DH brought one home for me from his travels last week. I am going to hang it in the dining part of our kitchen.

Sorry for hijacking your post Louislinus. Don't fret over purchasing the rug as you needed one at some point anyway and you got a beautiful rug for a song.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

That was a money saving deal, you could never pass that up. Keep on!!!! lol


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

I keep telling DH bargain shopping is all about opportunity buys. I'll assume it was a bargain, i have no idea, so assuming you would be buying a rug of decent quality soon, that's a good buy if it doesn't cause any hardship.

Now this wouldn't apply to situations where the money is not available or causes any hardship, or items not needed. But in this case it seems like you found a good opportunity when you just were trying not to spend money. After going through all our renovations, I know what that feels like!

But seriously, if your not looking for anything at the moment then avoid the sales. I'm all for being on the lookout for things, but shopping just to look is usually not compatible with a spending freeze in my experience.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

I agree with Jim. You each agreed to no new spending but you deviated. If I was your husband I would feel like someone punched me in the belly.
ok, getting off Jim's soapbox now.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

You did the right thing.

If it were just in a store, I could see concern but If I understand estate sales, wasnt like you could go buy it later. The colors really work for you and you could get a price break on top of it.

Seems like a logical, reasonable exception to your spending postponement.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

Oh, that is one beautiful rug and a great buy! But I am not completely on board with the rationalization. When finances are tight, and especially if you have a preexisting agreement with your partner, I'd pulled out a phone at the estate sale and pitch my case before making the purchase. Then come to an agreement one way, or the other, together. I know that is what I would do, because of a certain $125 9'x15.5' rug in our bonus room, that was purchased the week of closing on our house. :)

Hope nothing gets in the way of your being able to enjoy your new rug. It is lovely.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

OK, since you asked....it's a beautiful rug, but no, you didn't do okay under the situation you described. If you truly are having a money crunch for the time being, then this was a no-no that can strain a relationship. Too often one spouse disregards the seriousness of money issues and puts their wants above the relationship. A DR rug is beautiful, but it's not like replacing a furnace that goes out or paying the mortgage.

Now that being said, if your description of your agreement with your DH was tongue-in-cheek, and if instead it was just no spending unless we each find something that we both really think is a great deal, and we would be getting down the road anyway, then that's different, and I'd say "love the feeling of finding what you're looking for at a good price"!


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

My husband and I do the same thing. He would have been so mean and hateful if I had done that but he would have thought nothing about it had he found something he "just had to have" for his truck or some tool to put in the shop that he will never take out of the box once he inspects as there are dozens in there now and I doubt he even knows what most are for, but a rug! Yes. He would have pitched a fit about a "real" bargain. Men!

Incorrigible and not going to change just by a conversation about spending money, but then again I would probably be staying away from sales and stores and keeping my end of the bargain as I am wont to do whether he does or not. So, it's your marriage, you figure out whether what you do is right or wrong.

There have been many times when I have schlepped around needing a haircut or color (many times and would end up doing it myself, and I am pretty good at that) while he was off buying something for his truck or his tool shed, maybe a new pair of shoes he did not need (expensive shoes) or a suit that was originally 4 figures that he got on sale for 3 figures and maybe it did not fit him and he never bothered to alter it.

The only problem I see is that if you don't curb your spending now, after a few short years, your house is going to need upgrades and you will not have the discipline to save money for that purpose.

Like I said, it's your marriage. You must be the judge. Good luck and I hope it lasts for many years and that he and you respect each other's wishes and are forever happy.

P.S. Love the rug and it is worth a bit of a scolding and a couple days of cold shoulder while you shop sale catalogs. ;-)

This post was edited by patricia43 on Sat, Jul 12, 14 at 4:29


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

LOVE your rug and what a steal! I am sure when you look back on this in time and then look at your rug, you will be most happy you made the decision.

However, I would not go to any more estate sales or shopping until you can afford to.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

Love the rug, too, good luck!


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

So true about estate sales......going just for fun isn't really a compatible behavior with a spending freeze. You almost always see something that tugs at you and could create buyers remorse or didn't buy remorse. Both can take up a lot of energy that can be used in a much better way.

That being said, if I had a brand new house with empty spaces, I'd be going unless there were truly serious financial issues. Good buys often come along in bunches, and the rug you bought is special. You couldn't begin to duplicate that if you went looking for a new one.

So, enjoy going while you still actually need things. It's a fun place to be. Just do it in a prudent way and don't be afraid to pass on a sale occasionally. There are always more.

This post was edited by jjam on Sun, Jul 13, 14 at 14:09


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

Thanks all! Just to clarify DH is fine and not mad at all. I was just having some personal guilt. And we can still feed our kids, even after buying the rug. :) Only rice and beans but they won't starve. (I'm kidding!)

JJam - you are right that these good buys have been coming in bunches and I think that's what is crazy. It's like everywhere I go I am finding exactly what we need for a fraction of the price. For example, I have 4 year old twins who shared a room in our old house and now have their own room. They both needed some sort of toy storage in their room. Earlier this week I was at a closeout store and they had these super cute from Target toy boxes for $25 each! And then then I found at a garage sale a really sweet little antique dresser that had been whitewashed for $10! (DD's broke in the move.) So it's just been one thing after another. But you all are right that I just need to not go and avoid it all together for a few weeks to stop the madness.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

You just have to keep your head about you with these things. If money is NOT a renewable resource for you, i.e.: there is no money coming into the household, then your forego such purchases. If you're putting off getting that furnace repaired or getting clothes or braces or whatever for the kids, or if you're credit card is maxed out…then you forego such a purchase.

But there is reckless spending, and there is smart spending, even if the timing isn't perfect. Got to be conscious of which you're doing.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

Wow, great buy!
Estate sales in my area? People are basically selling (and BUYING) junk for more than if you bought it new in a store.

Or maybe I just don't recognize a good deal.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

Love the rug and although I adore tole painted trays, perhaps you should wait on buying that one until you're actually ready to redo the dining room.

Holly-Kay, I LOVE that tray and especially love how,you have used it on the backsplash!


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

You posted back in April that money was tight for dining room and flooring projects that you would like to do. Based on your April comments, I can't tell you that you did ok with this rug. Sorry.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

I think you did the right thing. Finding a great rug in that size for that price? I would have done the same thing and it doesn't sound like your family is going to suffer as a result.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

Gorgeous rug -- and a truly great price for that size! :)


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

Stunning rug, super-stunning price.

You did good. Now impose a shopping moratorium upon yourself, just for penance. A month? Two months? what would assuage your guilt?

You did the crime, now do the time.


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

Great rug. Call it your (or your husband's) birthday present and let go of the guilt.

ML


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RE: Tell me I did okay.

I started buying 2 years before I moved into my home or even knew I would be moving and building a new home!! I know it's crazy but I was on the internet looking at houseplans and my house is almost identical to the plan I was going to use, especially the exterior~this was 2001. I built and moved in 2006. My first purchase was a pair of antique mirrors I purchased in NC for the 2 vanities ' I would have' in the master bath.

I guess what I'm saying is when something is right it's *right* and you know it. Buying something even before you have the house is insane, but it's almost 7 years later and I 'm still loving the things I 'found' so many years before.


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