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lkplatow

How not to advertise on CL

lkplatow
12 years ago

We haven't had a good CL-bashing thread lately. Here's a classic from my area. Any good ones on your CL lately?

Here is a link that might be useful: Tall lamp

Comments (81)

  • rosesstink
    12 years ago

    Too funny! Here's one on our CL. Having once been a beer can collector who was not above digging up old garbage holes looking for treasure, I'm assuming that's what is meant by "hand dug". Maybe. How many bottles are there though? 100? 1000? "more"?

    Here is a link that might be useful: Hand dug bottles

  • clueless
    12 years ago

    It might be a blue, plastic duck:

    Here is a link that might be useful: Canardies

  • tournant
    12 years ago

    "Canard" is French for Duck ... we may be on to something :)

  • nosoccermom
    12 years ago

    Here's a "FULL VIEW. Digital drawing/painting of Canardie."

    Here is a link that might be useful: drawing of Canardie

  • shelayne
    12 years ago

    Between the world's greatest coffee table for a song and the driftwood furniture, I laughed so hard I cried. Then came the cat-colored couch, and I couldn't breathe.

    This is the best thread EVAH!

    Heck yeah, I'm heading over to CL. :D

  • shelayne
    12 years ago

    OK, here is one. It is not near the fun you all have posted, but the picture is what really brings it home. Heehee.
    ______________

    Broken kitchen/informal dining room table (it collapsed on us while trying to repair it)
    When it was in one piece it easily sat 8-12 people. (8 people when the leaf is out).
    It's a square table with a leaf that is on a hinge under the table.
    Below are "before" and "after" pictures - just to give you an idea of what you are getting.

    All the pieces except a few plastic slider pieces and a few screws are there.

    I have no idea if it can be put back together but maybe the pieces can be used to make a smaller table?

    Here is a link that might be useful: Table

  • shelayne
    12 years ago

    "Bag full of socks, mostly white. Most have been cut so as to distinguish them from wearing socks."
    ______________________________

    The picture brings home the whole "Trick or Treat, smell my feet" sing-song. Gee, I hope they are still available!

    Here is a link that might be useful: Trick or Treat

  • Carol love_the_yard (Zone 9A Jacksonville, FL)
    12 years ago

    Shelyane, the body language of the guy sitting behind the collapsed table tells it all. Hilarious!!

    Carol

  • kiki_thinking
    12 years ago

    Fabulous glossy cherry red chair painted and added rare pink marilyn monroe fabric and wrote marilyn monroe in pink on top, a one of a kind. If interested call 606-327-6966 .

    "Ever notice how 'What the h�ll' is always the right answer?"
    â Marilyn Monroe

    Here is a link that might be useful: what the...

  • kiki_thinking
    12 years ago

    A bar to match oly-chik's ad.

    BAR IS 100'' LONG 41'' WIDE, HERE IS THE UNIQUE POINT, IT'S SIDES AND FRONT IS MADE FROM NEW SOLID OAK CASKETS TOPS, PROBIBLY FROM CLARKSBURG CASKIT CO. COUNTER TOP IS MADE OF THE HARD TO FIND 1960"S BLACK IMITATION SLATE, IN VERY GOOD CONDITION, YOU MUST HAUL, NO DELIVERY'S, PS THE 3 OF US OLDER GUYS WERE ABLE TO PICK UP AND TAKE IN STORE, FURNITURE LIQUIDATORS OPEN MON TO SAT 10AM TO 6PM, SUNDAY 11 TO 5, 1-304-624-4683, PLEASE NO E-MAILS.

    Here is a link that might be useful: Dead drunk

  • graywings123
    12 years ago

    Yeah, I can just imagine how that spaghetti poodle has appreciated in value over time, just like my beanie baby collection. I'm sitting on a fortune!

  • riosamba
    12 years ago

    This one isn't really bad, unless you are a vegan. It is odd, though, and funny enough that it was featured in the local paper.:

    Hey locavores - goose dinner tonite? (S. Boulder)

    You can't get much more local than this...and you don't have to be a hunter to get a fresh goose.

    It's a little bizarre, but unfortunately (for me and the goose), I have a fully intact and cleanly dispatched goose (see pic) that's been kept well-refrigerated outside at ~30 degrees since the incident today. Animal Control assures that there's no health risk with geese and it's out of their jurisdiction to come pick it up. I'm not the kind to cook one up, so if you are then first-come first-served if you want a memorable local meal.

    E-mail if interested and more pics and info available. By the way, it's a very low roof and easy to reach with the small ladder I have. Couldn't be simpler!

    Here is a link that might be useful: Goose Dinner

  • Sandy1963
    12 years ago

    Hi, I've been lurking this board for a while, but when I look at my Craigslist ads, I always think of this board. These are too funny ! I did find a few ads this weekend that I thought 'what were they thinking?' Here you go...(hope they work !)

    Here is a link that might be useful: chair

  • anele_gw
    12 years ago

    These are hilarious!

    I was going to post that pretty much anything with "unique" in its title is bad. In my search, I found this.

    Here is a link that might be useful: Unique Pictures of Roadkill

  • jakabedy
    12 years ago

    A new one today . . .

    red cherry oak oamwall - $120 (hueytown)

    ----------------------------------------------------
    Date: 2012-03-08, 11:33AM EST
    Reply to: kb3qb-2882658012@sale.craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
    ----------------------------------------------------

    I have a beautiful cheryy oak oamwall for sale. hardley any scratches. please call or txt Dustin at xxx

    __________________

    What is an oamwall?!?! I'm thinking it's an armoire, but I really have no idea. No picture, of course.

  • Sandy1963
    12 years ago

    found another one.....

    Here is a link that might be useful: Huh?

  • polly929
    12 years ago

    jakabedy

    I'm thinking oamwall = armoire too. LMAO!

    But come on, did anyone figure out the canardy??

  • Carol love_the_yard (Zone 9A Jacksonville, FL)
    12 years ago

    Ok, we've all seen plenty of "rot iron". But today I found *raw* iron! LOL!

    "DECORATIVE MIRROR - RAW IRON - $40 (Jacksonville - Southside)

    Large, raw iron decorative mirror.
    No scratches or cracks.
    Dark iron, leaf design fits with any decor.

    Please, only serious inquiries. THANKS! :) "

    Here is a link that might be useful: DECORATIVE MIRROR - RAW IRON

  • weedyacres
    11 years ago

    OK, here's my contribution:

    Need one chair? I got one. One less person around so we got one chair to sell.
    {{!gwi}}

    There was a 2nd photo: of a guy in a t-shirt. Don't know if it was the seller or the "one less person."

  • lkplatow
    Original Author
    11 years ago

    So glad you've resurrected this thread. I've been on the hunt for a drop-front desk and keep running into this ad. Any clue what this means?

    "Also one of the two operators is not bent and therefore not connected to the loper like it should be"?

    Perhaps I need a canardy to fix it?

    Here is a link that might be useful: Secretary desk with something incomprehensible wrong with it

  • graywings123
    11 years ago

    I believe the loper is part of the metal hardware that supports the drop-front when it is lowered (which is why there isn't a photo with the front open). I bet someone in the woodworking forum or maybe the antiques forum could explain it.

  • lara9143
    11 years ago

    Ew, check this one out...


    http://sandiego.craigslist.org/csd/zip/2969909329.html

    Here is a link that might be useful: CL Link

  • jessicaml
    11 years ago

    Here's mine for today:

    Anyone need a Bakers Rake? Hey, they show it in a yard, so maybe they did mean rake...

  • wantoretire_did
    11 years ago

    I think this is a first!!!

    Here is a link that might be useful: Mid Evil

  • woodsy_1
    11 years ago

    Ahhh...but how well does it sing?

    Here is a link that might be useful: Karaoke(?) Cabinet

  • hhireno
    11 years ago

    Along the lines of poorly worded CL ads, I get emails with Groupon offers. Sometimes they have more than one deal so the title of the email mentions both.

    Today the Groupon email title was "Water park entrance/Colon hydrotherapy". Yikes! What exactly would you get if you signed up for that? Yesterday it was "Dolphin cruise/colon hydrotherapy".

    I think they need to rethink their pairings.

  • Fun2BHere
    11 years ago

    Woodsy1, I've thinking and thinking trying to figure out what word was misunderstood as "karaoke." First, let me say that I was astonished that the poster knew how to spell the word correctly only to misuse it so badly. Could they have meant, "curiosity?"

  • My3dogs ME zone 5A
    11 years ago

    I thought that the seller in the one that woodsy1 posted might mean 'tschotske'.

  • woodsy_1
    11 years ago

    Good guesses, ladies! I thought 'curio', but yours make much more sense. Whatever it means it made me laugh!

  • Fun2BHere
    11 years ago

    I thought it was funny, too, especially after I enlarged the picture to make sure there wasn't actually some kind of cabinet for a karaoke machine...LOL!

  • woodsy_1
    11 years ago

    Fun2BHere, I'm laughing all over again at the image in my head of you doing that. LOL indeed!

  • Olychick
    11 years ago

    I wonder if it was posted from a device that autocorrects and it turned curio into karaoke?

    Here is a link that might be useful: auto correct funnies

  • folkvictorian
    11 years ago

    Just found an ad for "Mental Chairs" -- they appear to be the old 1950's motel or backyard variety. I don't know what makes them Mental. Do you think it's the kind of Mental where they just go off and lose their tempers without warning? You wouldn't want that while you sat in one of them on a warm summer night while drinking something refreshing, now would you?

    Here is a link that might be useful: Mental chairs on Craiglist.

  • macybaby
    11 years ago

    Auto correct can do some funny things - I work for an organization with the word "Sacred Heart" in the name. One time the word "Sacred" got misspelled and the auto correct came back with "Scared" and that got accepted in a document that went to the BOD directors. Pretty funny - not for the guy that did it though.

  • kgsd
    11 years ago

    Macybaby, if I worked for that organization, I'd take "scared" out of my dictionary, so that it never came up as an alternative. The name of my company is also a common word, so I took the *uncapitalized* version of that word out of my dictionary so that spell check doesn't bypass it.

    (For example, let's say my company was called "Love". I have little reason to use the word "love" in my daily correspondence, so I took "love" out of my disctionary as an acceptable word.)

  • My3dogs ME zone 5A
    11 years ago

    I have not laughed as hard IN YEARS as I did at olychick's link above! The tears were streaming down my face last night.

    If you haven't seen it, do yourself a favor and check it out!

  • terezosa / terriks
    11 years ago

    When I clicked on olychick's link I was warned of a virus threat. Just FYI.

  • Olychick
    11 years ago

    Hmmm. I have a Mac, but it is a very popular site and the first google hit....so I wonder about the virus warning??? Sorry, if that's true. Maybe people can search for dam you autocorrect, only the dam has an n in it. That site is linked all over the net..so I'm hoping there is no virus!

  • My3dogs ME zone 5A
    11 years ago

    I have a PC and use Mozilla Firefox and had no problem. I use Norton antivirus. It truly is a hoot, and tonight I looked at some of the 'Parent Texts', which are just as bad.

  • dedtired
    11 years ago

    Someone is offering Th Alarm Clock From Hell:

    Wake up to your own little piece of Satan. This wheeled devil wakes you up with a screeching alarm that has only one ear-splitting volume. Then it flings itself off of your nightstand and proceeds to move about with remarkable alacrity and speed, and evades your sleep-deprived efforts to track him down.

    Not only will it torture you at the pre-appointed time, but it will occasionally go off at random. If that's not enough, it blinks ominously throughout the night, as if it is an evil genius, communing with Chuckie through some invisible Ouija board, planning your inevitable demise.

    The instructions are in badly-translated Japanese, so I'll be damned (along with the alarm clock) if I can determine the correct button combination that would allow me to rip the little bugger's wheels off.

    If you would an object that was born and bred in the depths of Dante's Inferno, this will certainly meet your demands. Feel free to use it yourself - or perhaps to offer a not-so-loved one a rude awakening.

    This demonic device is yours, for free. All you need to do is pick it up!

    Here is a link that might be useful: alarm clock from hell

  • My3dogs ME zone 5A
    11 years ago

    When I saw 'Pedstools - $60' this AM on CL, I initially thought it may have something to do with pedicures! But no - when I opened the post. Dark Cherry was not a polish color.

    Here is a link that might be useful: Pedstools - $60

  • terezosa / terriks
    11 years ago

    I always love the odd camera angles on CL. Does no one know how to rotate a picture??

  • Dando
    11 years ago

    Don't ask me how a found ONE AWESOME deal on "Chesters Drawers".....

  • terezosa / terriks
    11 years ago

    Hopefully Chester wasn't still wearing the drawers!

  • emagineer
    11 years ago

    I'm still thinking about the "canardie". It is French for duck (canard), with a historical background. I didn't link all found through the dictionaries. Basically the word means "fake", but also has a number of other meanings outside the US. Apologies, I get into a Word Smith moment and find the information interesting.

    Here is a link that might be useful: Webster Dictionary

  • My3dogs ME zone 5A
    11 years ago

    Today's CL in my area has an 'Easy chair and ottawa - $50'

    There are also 'two wick tables where 'very solid and sturdy wicker is all intaked.' (intact)

    And 'mc donalds stool - $100' Somehow I don't see a stool from McDonald's fetching $100!

    This is a good one -

    Antique Woodenware - $50 (Dreamland)
    Yes, folks, your eyes are NOT deceiving you!

    Listed for several months at $50 here on CraigsList, you can now buy this for $65! Yes, that's right -- for an additional $15 (or 30%) markup, you can get the SAME ITEM that's been languishing, overpriced and unwanted, on the shelf for months!
    Act now -- a deal like this won't be around for more than a few years!
    Oh, wait. Yes, it will be.
    Never mind

  • Olychick
    11 years ago

    my3dogs, I wonder if the same people who are writing these ads are the same as the ones who are programming autocorrect on devices?

    I once saw someone advertising a pair of chairs, "one chair for $50 or both for $115." Sheesh...

  • My3dogs ME zone 5A
    11 years ago

    olychick, I'm pretty sure the last one came from a person who has been razzed some people selling antiques, where they are asking crazy prices. So, it doesn't sell, jack the price up??? Make it look more valuable?

    I have seen the same on eBay where I have been watching an item with a Buy It Now price. It doesn't sell and comes back with a HIGHER BIN price. WHY?

    The first two, I just think can't spell, period. :-)

  • michelle32
    11 years ago

    For your next party?

    $90 worth of Honey Mustard (Lower Allston)
    Date: 2012-05-12, 12:46PM EDT
    Reply to: see below [Errors when replying to ads?]
    Free Honey mustard on Brentwood St. in Lower Allston.

    Paid over $100 2 years ago, now it's yours for FREE.

    2 boxes, 80-120 dippin' cups, single use.

    For pretzel or sandwich use

    GET THEM BEFORE THEY'RE GONE.

    Here is a link that might be useful: Free Mustard

  • terezosa / terriks
    11 years ago

    Too bad they don't have pictures of that honey mustard.

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