Would you be flattered if people copy your design ideas and use it for their house? For example, you were telling a friend that you want a modern rustic kitchen with XX cabinets, XX hardware, XX countertop and next thing you know, she, being more flushed w/ cash, went out and got your dream kitchen. Or when you just paint your house a certain color and the exact house across the street do the same.

The subdivision next to mine is brand new. This owner put in really nice landscape. She has courtyard entry, short columns flanking by 4 palms trees. Next thing you know the next door got the same landscape, and the next door, and the next. Now you drive down that subdivision and almost every house has the exact same design: courtyard, columns, 4 palm trees 2 on each side. LOL :-) When my SIl bought her house in her subdivision. She took her landscaper to a house (same elevation & model) she admire and told him, "do mine exactly like that". So not only their houses are identical, their front landscape are identical. I bet it must be annoying for the the other owner. :-)

I stole ideas from the internet all the time but the crime doesn't seem as bad because these people don't live next to me nor travel in my same circle. I try not to copy ideas from my friends' house, especially if we have mutual friends. I think most people want their house to remain unique. I am very generous with my resources & ideas with my friends and sometimes it stung a little, when a friend bought the chandelier or use the fabric I told her I was going to use in my own house. Dh thinks I should be flattered that somebody loves my ideas enough to steal it, still I'm a little bummed (at least until I find an even better chandelier or better fabric) LOL :-)

what's your take? Would you be offended if somebody copy your ideas? especially if she & you travel w/in the same circle? or you don't care and even feel flattered?

The worst one was a neighbour that my husband was the GC on her house, she would make excuses to my husband to go into our house, (I would be at work) and actually take pictures. My husband caught her one time. Now her house is up for sale, there are pictures on the internet and she has many of the decorating ideas we have in her home. I was not flattered or annoyed I was FURIOUS.

Two neighbours with way more money than us have both redone their bathrooms and kitchens after us. Both were very nice about coming over and asking about our colours and materials. I was flattered and gave them both lots of information, including what I would have done if I'd had more money. the result: they both have versions of my kitchen and bath, but much nicer. How do I feel about it? Honestly, I'm flattered, but I do have a little green monster in there that is hard to suppress. But I don't think I'm offended, because they asked. If they hadn't asked, I might feel differently.

The neighbours right next door to us were painting their house last summer and asked if they could paint it almost the same colour as ours. I said they could do whatever they wanted, but that I'd prefer if they didn't and that it might look odd. They chose another colour.

Having said all this, when we were painting our house I was freaking out because I couldn't pick a colour. I went to a neighbour whose house colour I liked and asked her opinion. She told me how much they liked their colour and said it would be okay if I used a similar colour. we picked a deeper shade of their colour. After they moved, another neighbour told me she was furious we had painted nearly the same colour. I didn't blame her and still wish I had been able to find a colour I loved for our house rather than what worked for them. But the point is, I guess, that it's not easy to be original and much easier to copy something you like.

I think we should try to be flattered, but it's human nature to be a teeny bit offended - esp. if they try to pass it off as their own and don't give you credit.

As far as the neighbors all doing the same landscaping, I guess people see something beautiful in a finished stage and because they do not have any creativity, they just reproduce a sure thing, I guess that's normal.

Unless you go out of your way to be original, funky, ecclectic, unusual, to the point that no one is going to be able to imitate your style, there will always be someone who wants to go the safe route and reproduce exactly what they see and love in your home decor.

I guess that's why so many people want inspiration pictures on these forums,
as in "show me this" and "show me that"........ but when it's your direct neighbors, yes very annoying......lol.

This story relates to your's but it has to do with clothing. When I was in high school I bought THE cutest outfit. Skirt with matching blazer. I got a lot of compliments on it. One day my best friend came to school in the exact same outfit. Know what I did? I stopped wearing the skirt and wore the blazer as an everyday jacket with my jeans. lol.

It's because she can't think of it on her own. She knows she likes "pleasing to look at (fill in the blank)" but can't do it herself. Same with the landscaping copier - she wanted hers to be as attractive as the yard she liked, and it was easy enough to get by copying. IOW, not a creative bone in their bodies. I would hope that statement does not offend anyone who has ever copied something from someone, because what I am saying is: most people want their homes to be nice/comfortable. That is achieved by painting, decorating, planting, etc. Someone who is creative can see something they like, but doesn't copy. They take what they like and make it their own, or take bits and pieces from different places, adding to it, and create their unique (fill in the blank).

For myself, our home is where I express my creativity. I don't paint on canvas or create ceramic pottery. I create our nest. It's personal. If I were artistic enough to paint on canvas or create ceramic pottery, I wouldn't want anyone imitating that so why would I want anyone imitating my home?

Three years ago, a decorator was at my home, she asked for a tour and we chatted along the way. When we finished she said "I'm going to be stealing a lot of your ideas." *cough*cough* At least she was honest?! I think I was too shocked to say anything. She's a decorator! Doesn't she have ideas of her own?!

Fast forward to last fall. Someone in neighborhood wants to install a wrought iron gate. We have one. See where this is going? It's not right down on the street, so person came up my driveway a bit to take a photo. So imagine my surprise when person submitted a photograph of my simple gate (that I went out of my way to "make my own") for approval. The ARC denied on the basis that although the Covenants want the neighborhood to be cohesive, they don't encourage replication. So you know what person does? Person puts a bunch of spears/arrows and calls it a day. Never submitted for approval. So now there is a supped up looking version of my gate in the neighborhood (that I get to pass when I come/go).

I'm sure someone is eventually going to say "if (we) don't want (our) ideas taken, why are (we) post pictures on the internet?" My ideas are not original. Seriously, is anything other than Hildi's gluing hay ALL over the walls truly original (not to mention a really bad idea!)?! It's what we do with the ideas, the bits and pieces gathered from all over, that are original.

She has a wonderful eye for colors, texture, etc. but I find her copying things that I do! Now I have to play dumb when she asks where I bought something, like I will have to say that the pair of candlesticks I have out were from my mother's friend years ago. Even if I just bought them at the dollar store or Macys last night. She will literally jump in her car and go get them. Then we'll be at her house with other friends and they fall all over her new decor and I want to scream my head off! But I don't, at least not out loud. DH hears all about it when we get home. :o)

Flattery here, yes; copy-cats in real life, no. Just my 2 cents!

It's a vicious circle to think were all unique. :0)

Who copied whom? No, I'm not bothered.

But, I have seen it happpen to others. I used to live in
a neighborhood of homes that were on 1 acre lots. There
was one lady who was always competing against another.
This lady was building her home and moving into the
neighborhood. Exactly what happened to Roseabbey. But
without the hubby being the GC. This new neighbor kept
sneaking over to copy everything from the windows, to
floors, to wood, trim, appliances, colors, even back
patio ... And she would tell everyone at book club or
in town, pta or libary. She would make comments like
"I saved so much money, I found this at this.. Or I
got this price..."
I would sit silently but I thought it was just tacky.

The worst part was to see the pain on the woman's face who
was being copied. I am sure she was happy for the new
neighbor but a part of her looked annoyed and truly hurt.
I think I would be hurt too. One or two things is fine
but everything is just strange.

Why do people do this?

Is it insecurity of their own tastes?

Are they just keeping up with the "Jones" or do they
really just want the item?

I love being creative and discovering my own tastes. I
would not want to copy everything another has. What does
it say about me? Okay copy 1 or 2 things. A color, or the
style of drape but to do what Cathrugg's friend is doing,
sounds like a frenemy.

Competition or compliment?

Thanks for this topic.
~boxerpups

I've never copied anyone full out in my circle of family or friends. But I've gotten ideas. Back in the 80's I liked my SIL's burber carpeting (I had never seen burber before). So when I was carpeting our new home I did put some in, albeit in a different color. Does that count as stealing? I don't think so. I'm sure we're all gotten ideas from others, but full out copying . . . that's just plain weird.

In the situations where one full out copies another, I wonder if the copy cat's home ends up "feeing" like the originals. I'll bet they don't. They absolutely can't have the same pride and satisfaction as the original creator. And I'm sure they don't get the same absolute joy in living in their space, because it wasn't created for THEIR family . . . it must in some ways feel like someone else's home, or a movie "set" to their family because it didn't take the PEOPLE into consideration. I may be wrong but I'd like to think they aren't enjoying their home as much as others that take the time to create.

Now here's a question . . . does anyone on this forum mind being copied by other's on this forum? I was inspired by several hundred photos and I know I borrowed ideas from many. I wonder if anyone is secretly resentful of this type of borrowing? And I wonder how many people copied EXACTLY (or almost exactly) kitchen designs, materials, etc. viewed on this forum? And how would that feel??

Before we built our home, we had gone on a parade of showcase homes for fun. We were going more to get floorplan layout ideas than anything, but we stumbled upon one home that was so beautifully decorated in a style I love. It ended up being the best thing we did. I used the same paint color in my kitchen, and we installed the same flooring. We also like the painted doors in the house and the hardware. We have different countertops, backsplash, lighting, cabinet glaze, etc. It was an inspiration for our own choices. It gave us direction. But, we didn't copy it exactly. And, of course, we don't know the people who live in this home.

Since our home was built, we've had a lot of compliments about the paint colors and decorating, especially in our kitchen. My sister loved the SW Compatible Cream in our bedroom so much that she decided to paint her own bedroom the same color. She also painted her bath a similar aqua shade. But she asked me if it was alright to copy the bedroom paint color first, and I was honestly flattered. It doesn't bother me. Maybe it would have more if she hadn't asked, I'm not sure.

I do think copying is a faux pas when it involves another party who is in the same family, neighborhood or circle of friends. While it's a compliment, the copycat is detracting from the original's uniqueness within its own circle.

Jan

The first time I posted on a thread here that asked this question, I dimly remember trying to convince people that we should feel flattered, not annoyed. That we should expect our pretty paint choices to be copied and not feel a frisson of irritation if we walked into a friend's house and saw our Nantucket Gray in their bedroom too....But I think I'm a little more realistic these days. It does irritate. And I don't know about you, but I think this is what I want....
I want to have friends tell me my house is pretty, they like my paint shade in the living room, where did I get the great drapes in the living room, and how did I ever come up with the idea to turn an old sideboard into a bath vanity? I want the complement. I want the approval. I may not NEED everybody to love what I do but it certainly makes me smile when someone does. I just don't want to see it carefully copied by someone I see every day. And to answer judydel's question about getting copied by someone on the board..........No, I know that would not bother me. I've found paint shades that others have used, bought fabric recommended by G-webbers, and finally figured out how to arrange my dresser stuff by carefully studying online photos. How could I object to their ideas bouncing off me and onto someone else?

Red

***and just for the record--even though I am not entirely happy with the River Gorge Gray I painted my kitchen, it was pretty nice when some casual friends walked in there last week and the husband raved about the color. He not only told me he loved it, he asked me if he could get the chip so they could use it in their house. He said it's just what they've been looking for. I got him the chip. And I hope they love it. I just hope they don't do it better than me...

I guess, if someone copied me exactly, I would be secretly annoyed if they ended up executing my ideas better than me! Still, I would view it as valdation of my original ideas

I'm like boxerpups. If anyone has done a direct copy of anything in my home, I don't know about it. The only time this came up was when a friend was at a social event at our home. He said he was impressed with the design and asked to see a copy of our house plans. I told him that I just couldn't recall where I had put them. :)

My point...I think there has to be someone within the 6,000 homes that has my exact elevation...I just accept it like "The Stepford Wives." At least I can do what I want on the inside...LOL

My last house looked just like its neighbors on the outside, and to a large extent, on the inside too. There just wasn't anything original about it, which I hated. We all copied from each other to a certain extent because that was what worked for that neighborhood...

I put up a wrought iron & stone fence out front, a few other houses in our neighborhood have done similar. A house down the block changed out their facade and added a portico, stucco'd the whole house and added stone facing and columns. We put up columns on our house, but it's a completely different look.

So, I guess, copying isn't an issue for us, inspiration is. Maybe in a newer subdivision or a place with CC&R's you'll find more copying, but I couldn't live in a place like that. I NEED to be able to do my own thing!

Also many of my choices of materials etc show up in a family member's home shortly after her visits here. Identical bedding has quickly turned up in another family member's home too. I suppose it could be flattering but usually I just find it funny because their homes are just soooo different from mine!

But - it might be different if it were closer to home with friends, family, and neighbors. Plus, I'm talking about inspiration here, not outright copying down to the paint color, fabrics, landscaping, etc.

I do steal some ideas here and there from friends - and tell them so - but this is more along the lines of liking a serving platter and purchasing a similar one, or admiring a friend's venetian plaster walls and begging my husband (unsuccessfully) to have the same done to our house. We all do that with each other, but it would be strange to have to limit expressing my ideas because I knew a friend with more $$$ would copy me. I do like to have some uniqueness and originality in my home!

I live in an older neighborhood with custom built homes so I don't have this problem, but you know many of the developments in So Cal have the exact same tract houses (reminds me of the time I walked into (what I thought was) my sister's house with a great big bouquet of balloons for a baby shower - boy, was the family in that living room surprised to see a stranger walk right into their house!). It would be strange to see the same houses with the exact same landscaping!

I have an architectural feature in my LR that I developed and designed and redesigned and lost sleep over that I would be *extremely* unhappy if one of the owners of an identical floorplan copied, because then someone might actually think it was an "option" in the floorplan rather than a unique solution to dealing with a midcentury modern staircase in an 1838 house.There are six such houses as part of the complex so there are almost identical plans.

(But I stole the general idea from Mies van der Rohe--who didn't use it in a Greek Revival House).

On another project I completely flipped the interior floorplan in a cookie cutter townhouse development, and the project contractor wanted to be able to market it himself to others in the development as a verbatim copy of the original. I didn't like that either. If a neighbor comes in and sees it, and *works it out on their own* how to carry if off...thats fine with me. Or hires me to do it...although I would never just repeat it verbatim.

General interior design stuff...I don't care so much. What I like *personally* is not something a lot of people would want to or be able to copy easily, anyway. (It takes a long time to accumulate 66 danish modern candlesticks, let alone arrange them all on one piece of furniture for example :P. But I get my ideas from sources and people get their ideas from me and its a big circle. Its flattering when they want to copy that, I think...I just get kinda bummed when they don't really get what they are copying.

A bride-to-be is at her shower, which is also attended by her mother and her father's new trophy wife. All is going well. People ask what the mother of the bride is going to wear to the wedding. She brings out a beautiful dress and everyone oohs and ahs. A few days later the bride-to-be is at her father's home and the new wife says "I just bought my dress for your wedding." She brings it out and it is the exact dress that the mother/ex-wife will be wearing. BTB cries out "You can't, that's my mother's dress!" Trophy stepmother says "I don't care, it will look better on me and besides, I love it."

BTB rushes over in tears to see her mother and sobs out the story. "She can't do that, can she? Will you have to buy a new dress?" Her mother gazes out the window for a moment and then smiles and says "Why yes, she can. But don't worry. I'll find another pretty dress." BTB says "How can you just give up? You'll be buying a new one and you'll have to return the prettier one."

"Oh, don't worry," says her mother. "I won't return the first one. I'll be wearing it to the rehearsal dinner."

I liked the shutter color a friend did 5 houses down and painted my door and shutters the same color. I did ask him what the color was and if he minded and he didn't at all. Our houses look very different otherwise.

I liked the shower curtain in another friends house and asked her where she bought it and bought one just like it. Again, she was pleased that I liked it enough to buy one just like it.

Now, how do I wear the floor tile to the rehearsal dinner?

Years ago I designed a mixed shrub and perennial border on the slope in front of my house. A good friend who lived with a similar house a couple of neighborhoods away copied most of it and I was flattered. I don't care if the mutual friends who visit both our homes think I copied her or she copied me, I really only care that my slope looked beautiful.

A few people wanted my dining room paint color in my last house, and I was happy to give it. In fact, I gave one of them the actual leftover paint!

It's not that I don't value my uniqueness, it's just that I think it's the whole composition that makes my house unique, not just acquisition of the purchasable elements...a few years ago I was very impressed by what my good friend and former college roommate wore to a wedding we both attended. I wanted a similar outfit for an upcoming event, and asked her where I could get it. She told me, and I went to the source and tried on a lot of things, but in the end had to admit that even the exact same pieces were not going to make me look as terrific as she looked--we're the same height and about the same size, but she has that certain something with clothes and I just do not. I think home decor is like that--they can buy the pieces but not the certain something that says "my house".

I may get clobbered on here, but some of the new subdivions look like cookie cooker house's anyways.

But I would freak if someone landscaped their yard just like mine in the neighborhood, if I had a similiar house.

We all steal, but there are degrees of stealing. But please don't come up with an exact living room as mine if we are close friends. Talk about a thief in the night, huh?

But the final straw was when they came with tape measures to gauge the dimensions of our rooms and said in the same breath: "we want ours to be bigger, and of course the finish will be more special, too".

It was hard to be friends after that. My husband wasn't as bothered as I was, and said I was envious of their opportunity. I can honestly say I wasn't threatened by it, but I was offended by their hubris.

The rest of the story: he left her for another woman, they lost the bigger nicer house in the divorce, and they're both miserable.

My FIL is a retired art historian. His job title meant that he was "curator" of the monuments and buildings of a significant European city. My husband comes out of that family culture, and finds us Americans odd in a couple of ways. We tear down gorgeous old buildings and put up cheap replacements. Cheap is bad, but they’re often cheap and ugly. The other thing he finds odd is how so many suburban homes start out as "pseudo" this or that. That’s his term, not mine. I’m usually defending the "American way".

His point is that so many of our housing developments, even high end developments, start out with imitation. Sometimes it’s done well; often it isn’t.

Many American homeowners start by buying a home that’s an imitation. A Cape Cod in Texas is a copy, not an original. My home has some detail work that makes my husband laugh every time it comes up. Empire style molding. It’s simply odd in our ranch home. And…where’s the ranch anyway? Our home is a ubiquitous style. It’s a copy of a copy of a copy.

And Empire? What the heck is that anyway? Napoleon wages war on Egypt and soon after neo-Egyptian elements in homes show up back in Europe. It gets copied and admired and reproduced until finally it jumps the pond. Two hundred years later it becomes something we can choose to use or not, or, to put a finer point on it, choose to use well or not.

I’m not exactly sure what I’m trying to get at. Maybe nothing. Or, maybe, oddly, what I’m trying to say is that imitation has history to it. That history can be global or very, very local. If someone uses something copied from after the Napoleonic Wars, we don’t say much about "copying". But if that person "copies" her next-door-neighbor, then apparently it becomes more problematic.

But why? If it’s "my" idea that’s been stolen, and if I’m going to see it every time I go in my neighbor’s house, what is it that has actually been taken? What real difference is there between taking an idea from a magazine, or the internet, or history, and taking it from my neighbor?

Hmmmmm…I don’t really have an answer to that. I think I would feel frustrated myself…although I doubt it will ever happen to me…but I’m not really sure why.

Every play that Will Shakespeare wrote has an original source, many out of a book of Italian stories that had been recently translated into English. He copied. Today he’d get sued for copywrite infringement. "But he made them his own," we say. Sure he did. And, maybe my neighbor is no Shakespeare, maybe because of the way houses are similar, copies are too close to the original.

Wellspring

I just copy mitch, but she dosen't know so it dosen't matter :oP

Honestly...I've gotten great ideas from this forum and have "copied" I suppose....who has the iron man climbing up the wall? (Ok I do too LOL) but mine is in the cat room and hers....well I don't remember cats...I just remember cool :)

I honestly have never had anyone copy me from point to point...perhaps because I put too much time into being unique so it's hard for someone to do, and I'm always flattered to be asked to help a friend.

I'm actually in this delima now. I toured a home a block away from mine, wonderful victorian and it had several wallpapers that I have been interviewing. Seeing them in person cemented my wants...but now I know that they have it, I don't want to have the same thing :( So I have to find a way to be unique with it....and still have the same thing LOL is that possible?

There are people who don't have a creative or decorating bone in their body, but are gifted in other ways. Those same people may not be able to explain their likes or a particular style, but know it when they see it. IMO, imitation *is* the sincerest form of flattery. ;o)

Totally Confused

For example, when I moved in and started experimenting with living room furniture arrangement, she assured me that there was only one possible place for the couch (we all know that's never true). When I found a different way, she copied it (I've since re-arranged many times, but that is my obsession). Then I got a pair of swivel chairs for the living room so that we could alternately watch television or swing around for conversation. Many years later she said to me "I have an idea for chairs in my living room--I'll get chairs that swivel, so you can turn around..yadda yadda" But what was funny was that she clearly did not feel like she got the idea from me--I could see that in her head she felt she had worked a problem out. Now, she had sat in my chairs perhaps 1,000 times. Funny!

Then, we remodeled the kitchen and expanded the doorway between it and the dining room--basically took down most of a wall. When my neighbor saw that she said "I've thought about doing that for years!" She sounded slightly peeved, as if I had stolen the idea from her, because it had been in her head for so long.

Now, to be very fair, I would never have come up with many of my ideas if it weren't for people here. My bathroom color scheme and material ideas are stolen directly from Casey, and I wonder if, as someone said, he is mad at me for stealing from him (to be fair his is much more intricately executed than mine).

But anyway, my feeling now is that I do see the very, very important qualities my neighbor possesses and if home decorating copying is one of her flaws, ah well, there are other positives. I'm going with the sincerest form of flattery now (well, for the moment anyway).

We've just finished a major remodel of our house and it makes me feel great the hear our family and friends rave about how much we've been able to accomplish/what we've done. But there's this one thorn in my side. An acquaintance of mine started her remodel a year or so after ours and already she has 3 or 4 of the same paint colors in her home and almost identical cabinetry and granite. That CAN'T be coincidence can it? I really wouldn't mind so much if once in a while she'd say something like, "I really liked how Danielle's turned out, soooo..." but that's never happened. I've tried to take the high road but it DOES bother me!

A friend of mine liked out bathroom paint color and asked if I would mind if she painted her bath the same color. I didn't care at all.

If someone liked one aspect of my kitchen- the wall color or the hood and wanted to copy, I'd be flattered. If they copied the while thing- cabinets, counters, wall color- I'd be annoyed.

The only time I've been annoyed is with a friend my mine in graduate school. I found a great suit for job interviews and she bought the same one! And then she bought the same shoes. I got a job at Ann Taylor and she decided to get a job at Banana Republic. I was really, really annoyed.

I will freely admit, I'm not very creative with home design. I need some inspiration but I usually don't do things exactly the same as my inspiration. For example, I like Rhonda's laundry room. I'll probably do the checkerboard floors, a similar wall color, and black accents. But the decor will be more transitional, less country. That's just my style.

Well, the next thing I knew, a neighbor told me that her brother was doing a sub contracting job at a new home in the next community over. She said that her brother was given a set of house plans and he noticed that at the bottom of the plans, they said Architectural Plans Property of Owners XXXXX and XXXXXX XXXXXX - our names!

We found out that this couple had decided they liked our house so much that they wanted the builder to build it, and he did. We were furious! we located the house, and toured it along with out camera for evidence. Initially, there was little we could do except take the owners and builder to small claims. A lawsuit was going to be too expensive, and just not worth the hassle.

The upside to this story, is that because the house was built with different brick, colors, etc., it didn't look nearly as pretty as our house - inside or out. We ran into this couple quite often at business functions, and I think that we made them feel pretty guilty about the whole thing, because they eventually sold their house.

Unfortunately, we were never able to use the builder again because of what he had done. Probably the best builder we ever had!

I live in a Cape Cod, the house across the street is a log home in the woods, the next house is a bi-level, my one neighbor lives in an old farm house, the other side is a 20+ year old home he built himself. Across the street from them the house is a ranch.

I get ideas from things I see, but can't say that I've copied someone else. My friend copied my new shower, on a smaller scale, and my neighbors are interested in the shower also. I take that as a compliment.

No one would ever "landscape" like I do, since I'm a gardener and don't do landscape ... so no worry's there! LOL!

I used to have a neighbor who went to the New York School of Interior Design. She left before finishing her degree for some reason. One of my neighbors jokes that she had to leave on account of taste (she has sort of a gaudy, cheap, and over-the-top style...think two tiered metal chandelier in a condo with 8 foot ceilings).

She once invited herself over and started inquiring about where things in my place come from and how much they cost! I don't mind sharing that info with "design friends" that I've shown pictures to online, but I was uncomfortable since she had told me in the past that she lied to her husband about their finances (he was in a Ph.D. program and she was in charge of their budget at the time).

By the end of her "visit", she had settled on buying a few of the things I have. In this condo community, our layouts are fairly similar. I was a little annoyed at the idea of this woman buying some of the pieces I hunted down over the course of many months.

Oh, within months, he had left her poor husband. He finished his Ph.D. and couldn't get a job. He had to move back to his parents' house and confided that she left him almost penniless. She's partying in Miami.

I have no idea if he built a house like mine or not. His GF was with him when I told him they were copyrighted and said to me "he can't afford to build this house." If not, WTH was he saying that to everyone and asking to buy my plans?!

My architect owns my plans and I have no doubt they have or will sell them again in the future. We made numerous changes to the original plans, that made the layout better and more livable along with making changes on the outside materials to cut down on upkeep. The good news is he is located in another state and they never sell the same plan (name, or size) in the same zip code.

I admit to feeling flattered many decades ago when our builder asked to allow some new potential clients to see our home. It was a cookie-cutter style of house but we had made several changes to upgrade. It really did look much nicer than other similar houses in the area that he had built. I don't know if those people copied our ideas exactly but with that type of house what difference would it make? I'm sure their furniture was not identical.

More recently it also felt validating when someone (seeing our house for the first time and being told I shop mostly in pre-owned venues) said emphatically that she would have to start attending yard sales. I think I'm pretty safe from exact copiers tho.

If anyone were able to copy my decor today I'd change it in some way ASAP because it would annoy me. Of course copying our exact unique house design with my unique choices of accessories would be a challenge for anyone and since I change accessories frequently most couldn't keep up! LOL Lots of luck to anyone exactly copying the original paint color in my den which I mixed myself.

Might be a lesson for some to put their own individual stamp on their decor to make it more difficult to copy - if it's something that bothers them.

Recently found this old thread which critiques imitations.

More so related to my children but I am dealing with this "issue" if you want to call it that at this very moment. Our neighbors of 2 years are giving us the silent treatment for the last 3 months. She has over that time made several comments that we have copied them. P-L-E-A-S-E! We bought our son an electric ride on toy that they also had. I came across it on kijiji for an incredible price and couldn't pass it by. She said to my husband "well the next thing you'll be doing is cutting your children's hair short and dying it blonde". I saw RED! I'm thinking to myself "In order to avoid being called a copycat do I need to post a memo so you know what our plans and intentions are regarding our children, house and property for the next 10 years?" I think not.

If something makes me happy + it makes you happy, doesn't that = 2 happy people?

Anyway, 90% of paint colors are stupid. Okay, not stupid, but I can't blame anyone who wants to know what color makes a great yellow house.

Before anyone thinks I'm a happy-go-lucky, start a thread on, ahem, "design" decisions of neighbors. Really, I'd rather them copy.

Fascinating subject and a look at a subject I know nothing about!

Ann

LOL! Perhaps you would like to join me in my "stealth" home painting business. There are always homes in my neighborhood that I would just love to repaint in the middle of the night. There is also work available for "stealth" landscapers!

Someone posted above about the copier who really seemed to believe that the ideas were hers originally. I have one relative who does that all the time. She will point, Vanna White-style, to something in her home and say something like "I found a wicker table and painted it butter yellow. I think a pot of red geraniums on it makes for a cheery look in the entryway!" Yes, exactly as that same combination I put together that she commented on last week in my entryway does....
Those folks leave me scratching my head, but don't make me angry.

The ones I find aggravating are those who claim they "don't have time" for home decorating and then just write a check to have someone else do all the work utilizing all the colors/details they've found at my home -that we've spent hours researching & DIY'd on our weekend/vacation time. Like others noted above, what I hate most about this is others thinking we've taken the copiers' ideas and copied them.

Most people here have more design/decor experience than I do, but I've been happy to offer ideas, sources, paint colors, etc. when asked or if I think I can contribute. If you're participating in this type of forum you are likely open to that kind of sharing.

Sorry for the thread jack.

It's true that most so-called original ideas are inspired by one thing or another. I do my share of getting ideas from here and there, but in the end, I do filter it through my creative lenses and make it my own. I don't mind if people use the same colors. I would even offer to let my friend borrowed left-over paint so they can test on their walls. I don't mind sharing resources (skilled craftmen, best place to buy fabric, etc.). I have no problem spending hours helping my friends to shop, decorate, design their homes. Just because I bought an item, it doesn't mean my friends are barred from getting it for their own home. However, I would never get an unique item or design idea from my friends' house because I don't want to upstage them, you know.

My story: A friend is remodeling her master bed/bath suite. She has a designer on board & the concept was brown cabinet, granite countertop, travertine flooring. We were talking a/b her remodel when she asked me what would I do for my bathroom remodel & I told her the details of my dream bath (onyx bookmatched shower, chiseled onyx backsplash, etc..). I found a chandelier which I love love love and it would be the crowning glory for my dream bath (bought the chandelier, still saving $$ for the bath). Anyhow, recently I went to her house w/ couple girlfriends to check out her new master bath. Much to my dismay, she has used all my ideas for my dream bath in hers: same countertop, same flooring, same tub, same wallpaper, even my inspirational chandelier (which she knew I already bought). All the girls Ohh and Ahh because that bathroom is freakingly gorgeous. On one hand, I felt glad that all the details I'd dreamed a/b came together so beautifully in real life. On another hand, I felt so peeved because this is supposed to be mine, not hers, you know. It's like having your best friend stole your dream guy from you. It sucked. I asked her, "I thought the designer's design was different." She said, "oh, I fired him and designed it myself. Granite & travertine is so passe---onyx is the "in" thing now."

The rub is, the other day -- another friend came to our house and saw the chandelier I'd bought for the bathroom. She said, "oh--isn't that the chandy that S- used in her gorgeous bath? It's a pretty chandy but I wouldn't use it if I were you. Everybody would think that you are a copycat." :-)

Let's just say that the very next morning, that chandy was on its way to my sister's house (in another state) where it will be the crowning glory for her dining room. :-). And me, I'm getting ideas for another bath and this time, I won't tell anybody (except you guys, of course) ;-D

Why would you not just tell her right then and there that you've had that chandelier for X months and S basically copied your ideas? Also, I'm also freaking wondering who cares if her bathroom looks like yours? Unless you parade your friends in there weekly to show off your decor, who goes into your bathroom anyways?

I'm surprised how easily some people are swayed by the comments and petty statements of others. I understand your anger at being copied - but why just not say something right then and there in a calm, non accusatory way - "S, I showed you my chandelier and shared this exact vision for my bathroom! It looks lovely, but I feel like you've stolen my dream bathroom!!"

I don't get how you can consider these people "friends" if they would do something they know would hurt you, and you can't tell them how you're feeling.

I just wish that my friend had asked me & be honest a/b it. I probably would come up with something even better for her dream bath. I supposed the way it happened irked me more than the fact that it happened. I wish I can be magnanimous like my DH but I am working on it LOL :-D

Weird as it seems, now that I talked a/b it here -- it didn't bother me as much as before. The chandelier is beautiful, but I don't mind giving it away. My sister loves it too and she needs a new chandy. I want my friend to have her moment & her unique bath. It would be a while before I do our bathroom, and I'm sure by then, I would have plenty more ideas. There is always another beautiful chandelier. LOL :-)

I know people who are very particular a/b not sharing. I have a friend who makes the best 7-layered dip and she wouldn't share the recipe with me. Even though we are best friends. She would make it & give it to me but sharing the secret recipe? never! It's like the secret to the Krabby Patty LOL :-)

Having said that, I'm very glad for those who share ideas on here and in magazines. And are magnanimous enough to feel flattered instead of annoyed LOL :-D

I don't know why people do what they do, or why we feel the way we feel either. Maybe I would confront her but what's the point, it's done. Why make her feel bad, you know. Maybe I should hang the chandelier but I don't feel like it. Maybe I don't love it that much after all.

Now I have these gorgeous Baker chairs and I don't care who has them or who copy me, I would still keep them in my house & love them LOL :-D Another friend bought the bedding I love & have and every time she saw mine she said, "I love your bedding." and I said, "I love yours too" and we just laugh a/b it.

You're right, making someone feel bad doesn't make you feel any better. I guess the more I think about it, I would probably feel a little perturbed if my friends were copying all my decor ideas verbatim.

Of course, since that never happens, I guess that's why I'm so surprised at how strongly people feel about their ideas being used.

I guess we just all need to learn to let the little things go and move on - like you did with the chandy. You don't have to look at it and be reminded of your friend's b-room and you gave your sister pleasure and happiness in using it in her house!

Honestly, this is a sad thread, and affirms to me that our decision to live in the boonies, in a non-upscale area, with few neighbors is the best choice we ever made, I would never, ever survive in a neighborhood full of frenemies, no how, no way, IMO life is just too damn short to worry about whose chandy, landscaping, color scheme, wallpaper, etc., is being copied by whom.

What was that Charlie Daniels song..."If you don't like the way I'm living, you just leave this long haired country boy alone...", that's how we feel.

sandyponder

sandyponder

It's not illegal to copy a friend's creative ideas, but it's still bad form.

Should I be offended that no one wants to copy me? lol. I don't really know how I'd feel, though. I know that when I got my first apartment, as a college sophomore, my roommate who owned the place had spent the summer decorating it -- and I don't mean "college" decorating, but real live decorating. It definitely had an impact on me and my style from then on, but I don't know if I was "copying" or if it just struck a nerve that was already there. It was sort of a Ralph Lauren cottage meets Pop Art place, which sounds odd but it was so darn cute. Red and blue fabrics and Roy Lichtenstein prints ...

But in the days that followed I changed my mind. I have
been in the process of painting, working on and trying to
frilly up my home. No luck. My home is ugly and I need
help. Desperate help.

So forgive me,
I NEED TO IMMITATE. My home is so horribly decorated and
looking like early American dog hair goes Brady bunch
retro that I need to copy someone. I assure you it is not
out of competition or even to try to do a better job than
any of the lovely homes here. It is simply that my
taste is in my elbow or maybe my ear. And I have no sense
of proportion, color, style, .... I am at a complete loss.

I wish I could say it is because I am a scientist or
accountant but no, I studied fine Art and got all As.
Somehow raising kids, wiping up dog drool, crowded carpool
lanes, pta mafia, lazy keister sitting while reading GW,
laundry, laundry and more more laundry along with,
pulling dirty socks out of the crevice of a sofa cushion
to do more laundry, scrubbing toothpaste spit off the
mirror, emptying the dw, finding nail polish drops on
the carpet and having a hissy fit, making 30 cupcakes
that second because some kid forgot to tell me last week
he signed me up for the duty, …. all this has caused me
to forget.

Yes, I forgot me, I forgot what I like, my favorite
colors, art, furniture, I forgot how to make my home
gorgeous.

So please forgive me if I borrow or steal or copy your
Amazing rooms. It is not out of flattery but out of Sheer
Desperation. : )

Thanks Garden webbers.

Re: Boxerpups----I totally get it!! That's how I feel here, that I need to copy other's wonderful talent. If someone here suggests I move something or adjust something, I can assure you I do exactly "as told" because I trust and appreciate everyone's opinion here. I have learned things that would never have occured to me and I am so grateful. (And I look like a pro when I make suggestions to others I know!)

I love this thread, even if parts of it make me want to cry.

Anyhooo .. other than that if people don't live right next to me, I don't mind at all. I have a good friend that lives down the street and she likes to decorate cottage too. She often will ask my thoughts or opinions, but she has her own personal style, which is beautiful. I love that I can share with her and her with me like that.

We both have:
Pools
Palm Trees
Stained fences

...and that's just the outside. Do they look anywhere near the same? Not even close! Course, it helps that ours is a 2-story and theirs is a single ;-)

In regards to paint, this is one of those hoods where the builders (thank goodness) didn't use the same color brick anywhere close together - the same paint wouldn't look the same even if someone did copy! The nearest my brick is duplicated is at least 2 blocks away from us, and on a single!

I have a cake recipe that came to me from a friend 15 yrs ago. She brought the cake over for us one Christmas and hubby fell in love (with the cake, that is)--it's his favorite to this day. She gave me the recipe, titled "Susie's....." (and my friend was not Susie). Who knows where the recipe came from originally. But anyway, it soon became my "signature" Christmas cake--the one the family always had, the one I made for others as gifts, etc. I took it to my in-laws one year and SIL had to have the recipe. She made it and took it to work where everyone there had to have the recipe. Well, a sister of my SIL's co-worker has a catering business (bakery, too) and got hold of the recipe. That cake is now her most requested cake. I bet by now she feels it's HER recipe :-)

It's not illegal to copy a friend's creative ideas, but it's still bad form."

I feel that I spend a lot of time thinking about the way I want my house to look. I would guess that's true for most everyone here or they wouldn't be spending so much time on a home decor board. I know when I was copied I felt that I had put all of the work and time and trial and error into something that somebody else just went and stole the credit for. Again, I know this isn't very mature - but I can't help it! Wish I could!

Take Susie's cake. If I were Susie, and I went to a party catered by the caterer and saw 'my' cake being served, I'd simply have to ask the caterer about it. If the caterer then said to me "That's called 'Susie's Cake' and is a fabulous recipe I got from a friend of a friend." then I'd be tickled pink and introduce myself as 'the' Susie. But if she simply said "Isn't the Lime Chiffon heavenly?" -- THEN I'd be pi$$ed!

One of my best friends bought my same bedspread after seeing it in my house. While we have a lot of the same friends, she entertains much more than I do -- so everyone will see it there first. But I've heard her say more than once that she liked mine so much she got one just like it. Again, giving credit takes the sting out.

It doesn't bother me if someone copies "my" ideas (I've probably copied them from a magazine or a house I liked). It's flattering that someone likes it enough to want it for their own, and it's interesting to see in what direction the copiers have taken the ideas, too. My contractor drove a new client by our home that we remodeled recently. The client wants to use the same exterior color scheme: white siding, red roof. I can hardly wait to see how her home turns out.

Like segbrown pointed out, should we be offended if no one wants to copy our ideas? Has anybody gone back to a former home and seen that your decor ideas were obliterated by the new owners? How does that make you feel?

In fact, I guess I must have copied my current style from you. You pegged it perfectly!

I'm getting that desperation thing down to...

awn03, this exact same thing happened to me 10 years ago when we sold our home to friends. Hearing about the changes they were making over the next few years was annoying, sometimes insulting
(she'd ask me: "don't you think this is better ?" )
but we do have very different tastes and I could understand them going in a different direction.

reverse imitation can feel like disapproval, I learned to grin and bear it but it was a bit difficult for my ego , I have to admit, lol....
I bit my tongue many times.

Yes - That happened to me. And the new owners made it look SOOOOO much better! It made me realize that I had been a very passive 'decorator' -- just adding furniture and knick-nacks without really analyzing what worked and didn't work. The new owner's changes were structural and dramatic. She fixed what was wrong with the house's design that I hadn't been able to identify....

I got inspired and felt challenged (in a positive way).

Although, I'm on a diet, and really don't need a cake recipe that I'm going to fall in love with.

...and BTW, Mitch...anyone who would make drastic changes, in a home of yours, and then have the gall to brag about it, must have pretty lousy taste. :)

If somebody copied a vignette of mine somewhere in their home I would be fine w/ that. If they copied more than that and almost copied my home I would be downright irritated. Maybe even angry, but only if they didn't ask.

I've spent alot of time fleshing out my personal style and continue to evolve and I think that each person has their own that they need to find. That's probably why I would find it hard to have a decorator come in and 'Do' my house. That's what makes us an individual. As an individual I do not want anybody copying me. If I can be of inspiration to help somebody figure something out or toss out ideas then great! But if somebody outright copies me - I'm not going to be happy.

I've already found me and I'd be more than happy to help you find you.

The sincerest form of flattery in my book is asking me how I did something, what I thought and if you want, ask me for my help.

That goes for everything - my perfume too. Took me forever to finally find one that I thought was truly 'me' (I'm a signature kind of perfume gal). Then it took another 2yrs. to finally get it (afford it) for Christmas. My BIL smelled it and told my sister that she should get it and she agreed. I almost smacked her. I know that they don't get it but I pride my individuality in the things that I do and wear and that's just the way that I am.

Closing my eyes and posting!

This should be its own thread. My extensive rose garden with underplantings, was obliterated by the new owners, who didn't want to be bothered. To be fair, they did ask me if I wanted any of the plants, and I got my pals together and took more of them. The garden had been planted by the house's long-time owner, and some of the varieties just aren't around any more. And they repainted my red dining room.

Since almost the day they were born, suburbs have been criticized for their plain vanilla sameness. Is the downturn causing the landscape to become even more look-alike?

Faced with declining demand for new homes and a glut of inventory, home builders are cutting house plans from their portfolios and standardizing on design in an effort to save costs and better compete with bargain-priced foreclosures and pre-existing homes.

Miami-based Lennar Corporation is streamlining the number of models it offers for new homes. And Los Angeles–based builder KB Home "is cutting costs partly by standardizing window sizes and floor plans rather than allowing endless local variations," The Wall Street Journal recently reported.

Is what's good for builders good for the suburbs?
The big home builders have a long history of "value engineering" -- finding ways to squeeze costs and time out of the home-building process, whether by cutting back on expensive materials or spacing studs farther apart. During the boom, it allowed them to put more homes up faster and rake in profits. Now, it's a more a matter of survival.

Steve Ruffner, president of KB Home's southern California division, tells us that the Wall Street Journal is referring to the company's "Open Series." This year-old house collection is, indeed, offered nationwide. And these homes do feature standardized windows and flooring. KB also contracted with KitchenAid, Maytag, and Delta for appliances and furnishings. "It gets much better deals for customers," Ruffner says, adding that the series targets homeowners who earn the median income in their respective markets.

KB Home Chief Executive Jeffrey Mezger told analysts last year that the new designs cut construction costs by $80,000 and allowed it to cut home prices by $60,000 on a typical home, according to Business Week.

If The Open Series sounds like historic Levittown developments writ very, very large, you wouldn't be completely off the mark. In their respective heydays, both targeted first-time buyers, and both achieved affordability through economies of scale. KB as well as Levitt and Sons, the now-bankrupt developer of Levittown, have allowed for customization, although naturally there are many more options nowadays than the gray-flannel-suit era offered.

In that sense, KB is fighting against the homogeneity of postwar housing. The company, along with other home builders, is also trying to right the wrongs of suburbs past: Open Series homes are built to Energy Star specifications, and they're 45 percent more energy-efficient than homes constructed in the 1990s.

And both KB and Lennar get credit for thinking smaller. In keeping with a trend toward smaller homes, Lennar has been nixing the super-sized plans from its portfolio. Ruffner won't specify the average size of Open Series interiors, but says that customers can elect to expand the square footage of the base models.

Levittown and its ilk encouraged Americans to settle in gas- and land-guzzling hinterlands, ushering in the age of strip malls and cookie cutter developments. At least Mother Nature can thank the recession for making future suburbs a little more eco-friendly.