I wouldn't say anything but that's just me. I think it would simply be enough for me that I was leaving. I think you should do what you feel is best for you.

Let it go. I left a job to move to a better, happier one across the country. I didn't tell my supervisor what I really thought about their company (I left after less than a year, so reaps she could tell...) A year later, my new company joined with a company in my old city, and of course my former supervisor had moved on to that company was now part of my group.

You are retiring, but you don't know how your superior will talk about you after you leave, and whom you will encounter later on.

Don't burn bridges, let it go.

I would get a pen and some paper. Write down everything you want to say. Write, write, write. When finished, fold the pages and seal them in an envelope. Address the envelope to the supervisor.

Then grab the letter and a pack of matches. Go into your backyard and set it on fire, letting the letter burn to ashes.

You will feel better. I promise.

jmco's advice is excellent.

I wouldn't say anything, if I were you, on my own behalf because i'd be leaving and it wouldn't have any impact. However, if it's an institutional problem, and you think you can speak for those who will still be there but can't say anything for fear of being retaliated against, I would absolutely speak up.

If there was a constructive way that you could give some feedback that might help other employes there without totally burning all bridges I might do it. Otherwise no, not worth it.

count your blessing, among which is the burying of this particular hatchet. QUIET!

I never burn bridges. You never know what life will hand you in the future, and who you will come across, or even need help from. We have all had some lousy jobs, and have wanted a little rant before leaving, but it does not really do any good in the end. It is far better to move on than to live with regret of things said. That being said, I have trouble keeping emotion out of that type of conversation. You may be able to handle this differently. Have a blissful retirement, put a little smirk in your smile, and forget the nasty ones you left behind. Woo-hoo, fist bump, you are the winner! Congrats.

I would not say anything.

Is it a large enough company where HR offers exit interviews?

IMHO, this is not the time to complain ... that time was four years ago when it might have made a difference in your life. Why not let them remember you fondly?

If the company responsibly and seriously conducts confidential exit interviews, I would give and honest but helpful (and only constructive) feedback in that exit interview.

If it does not, then they do not value the input of exiting employees and they do not deserve your time, thought, or angst.

If you feel that you want to get something off your chest, you should. It is good for you --- but throw the letter in the fire or do primal scream therapy or kick a soccer ball. It probably won't be satisfying anyway.

Happy retirement!

Joanie, I remember some of your posts, and how you felt about your work environment. Can you answer this one question, 'What good would come out of speaking up?"

I have never confronted a boss, but what I have found in my personal relationships is that things often don't go as planned. With what I thought would be a no brainer, turned into something entirely different. People experience things so differently sometimes, it's almost shocking.

I actually did quit a job because I didn't agree with what I was asked to do. But it was kept neutral. I'm still invited for birthday and holiday lunches. I still like the people, just not that job.

Only you know the exact circumstances. If it was hurtful in a personal way (for you), I would let it go. If it were things bordering on illegal or discriminatory I would absolutely speak my mind.
The question is, can you do this in a professional way without letting emotions get in the way?
Another thing to consider is if your office is planning a retirement gathering for you?

Personally? I'd only do so if there is an exit interview. If not, I'd go with jm's idea of writing it down and burning it.

I wonder if the feelings you have now will quickly dissipate once you retire and begin to enjoy your newfound freedom. I agree that unless there is an exit interview in which you can offer constructive criticism which which is welcomed, it isn't worth it.

Happy retirement!!

No because they might think you need to be taking pills.

say nothing, don't burn a bridge you may need in a pinch.

me, i'd screw it up and say something.

don't do that.

Wouldn't it be best practice if all jobs had and exit interview every time anyone left for any reason? If done well it could be the catalyst for improved working conditions. Before I can answer you I need to know your hope for this conversation. If there are issues that make working in that environment negative for people in general then yes I think it is your responsibility to help improve the situation. If they are all very specific, personal issues only you are impacted by--not sure the point of the conversation. It comes too late to improve the situation so all the boss can say is "I am sorry you were unhappy". Are you likely to get that validation? If your hope is for boss to be as miserable as you--well that isn't something I would care to have to atone for.

When I left my first real job after college I had to give an exit interview. My job was very stressful and I wasn't impressed with how my branch was managed. I truthfully answered the exit interview questions and didn't think anything of it until my old boss called me that night to yell at me about what I said during the exit interview!

I assumed my exit interview was confidential and was completely mortified about the confrontation. I'm sure the boss was completely out of line and I probably should have called HR about her. And honestly, what kind of organization uses a 22 yo's opinion as a basis for disciplining a manager?

So, being a person that spoke up and had it totally backfire, I wouldn't say anything. The potential for misunderstanding is very high.

PS Congratulations!

{{!gwi}}

This post was edited by deee on Thu, Nov 13, 14 at 7:21

However the supervisor responds doesnt matter, if it will make you feel better, than do it, Only you truly know the answer. I personally would tell him or her, I know that would make me feel better and I wouldnt have any regrets later. I believe its how you say things not what you say. Good luck and happy retirement!

I remember when we were having a farewell party for someone who was leaving and the host stupidly asked this person if he had any parting words of advice...well, he did! And he unloaded on everyone. It was terribly embarrassing, totally inappropriate and whatever good he had done over his years with the firm, they were undone in those few minutes and all anyone after remembered about him was how he unloaded on everyone at the farewell party.

That's certainly not how I would want to be remembered.

And in my life, there have been enough surprising coincidences and re-engagements with people from my past that I never want to leave a bad taste in anyone's mouth...with the exception of my ex SIL. ;)

So in a word, don't.

I haven't had a chance to read the other responses, but I did exactly what you're suggesting. It felt good to get it off my chest, at the time. But looking back, I really wish I kept my mouth shut.

I wouldn't want anybody, even someone I disliked heartily to have their last impression of me being that I was a disgruntled b---h who didn't have the class to exit gracefully. I would consider it "lowering" myself.

Edited to complete:

Not that you Are, necessarily, but people who are difficult to work for, self absorbed and unpleasant either lack the insight to realize this (they think everyone else is the problem) --or they don't really care. I don't think your speaking up will actually change anything.

{{!gwi}}

This post was edited by palimpsest on Thu, Nov 13, 14 at 9:08

Not knowing the circumstances I would have to ask myself how I would feel if in a few months (years?) I was to hear that something bad happened in my former workplace that may have been prevented had I spoken up.

If you decide to speak up, go to the business owner or highest supervisor that you can reach. A person with more power then your boss, if your boss is part of the problem.

Edited to add:
Congratulations on your retirement!

ML

This post was edited by maddielee on Thu, Nov 13, 14 at 9:44

I haven't had a chance to read the other responses, but I did exactly what you're suggesting. It felt good to get it off my chest, at the time. But looking back, I really wish I kept my mouth shut.

Wow.....thank you all for your responses! It has put things in perspective for me. I will probably not say anything and just stomp, scream, and burn letters in December!

Reflecting on it....I did try to say things here and there in the last 4 years but it didn't make a difference then so it surely will not make a difference now...I see that now.

I have felt very disrespected, even betrayed, in the last four years but I will leave knowing I gave this place 5,000% and while I am not perfect and could/should have done some things differently, I was always honest, forthright, respectful, etc...things my supervisors/director were not---but that is on them...these are all intelligent women, they are not clueless...they know how they treated me. My director, who works at a different location and has known I was retiring for 2 weeks, was here yesterday but did not utter one word to me about retiring or anything else for that matter....what does that tell you?

They all act surprised I do not want any fanfare--no party, luncheon, gifts, etc. I know any gesture on their part would just be fake and phony based on the last 4 years....I would not be able to stomach such a display.

I am just letting it all go, will walk away and never look back. I hope to never see most of these people again---never the way I would have imagined leaving----so disappointing really.

Thanks again, everyone.

Just be glad you're getting out relatively unscathed. Take some people you actually do like and have your own party.

You know, I think you have arrived at the right conclusion Joanie.

Walk away with your head held high and a smile on your lips. Let their last impression of you show that you are in a great place despite the many atrocities that were done to you. They weren't able to change you! Talk about how you're looking forward to get stuff done, get a new hobby, gardening, reading, volunteering, anything that interests you so THEY are aware that you do have a good life waiting for you, and great plans after retirement. Congrats BTW!

Just had to share this.....I was stunned to the point it made me cry.

A very high level director who used to be head of a department that intersected with our office but has since moved up the ranks, just called me. We would work together intermittently but I have not talked to him or seen him in almost 2 years.

He heard of my retirment and called to congratulate me and tell me what a pleasure it had been working with me, etc...

It made my day! And hearing such nice things from a higher up, who didnt have to take the time to call me, let me know that at least one person I respected valued me as an employee and "colleague." I am so over my current supervisors now!

Thanks again all.

Congratulations on your upcoming retirement joanie! Just knowing you can enter the holidays with a stress-free life must be such a relief.

I'd do exactly as jmc suggests...either write it out or furiously type it out, pounding those computer keys as hard as you can Print it out, seal it, then read it about a week or so after you retire. Go gracefully into this good night. And remember, the best revenge is to live well.

Living well is the best revenge.

Yes, if it's just that petty office personalities garbage, let it go. That goes on in every single office. Egos and ambition, jealousy, pettinessâ¦get a bunch of people in a room and it's bound to happen. I left the formal workforce and went out of my own because I couldn't stand it. I'm more one to see everyone succeed rather than stomping on others in order to get myself ahead. That kind of personality doesn't bode well in the current overall environment, IMO.

But it's when something is legal or business based, i.e.: sexual harassment or someone is stealing or the powers-that-be are sticking it to employees, those with moral courage must stand up, IMO, esp. at opportune times like when they're leaving and can't be retaliated against.

Joanie, I'm so glad to read your update! You got some wonderful advice. Hopefully, that call will help you put all the other stuff behind you and you can leave with your head up high knowing that you were valued by someone whom you respected. The others aren't worthy of a second thought!

Joanie, I'm happy for you. What a blessing!

Congratulations on your retirement, and on being validated by the director higher up in the company. It sounds like you have made the right decision for you. I have also learned never to burn a bridge. Even though I live in a city, the sector I work in is very connected. Everyone seems to know everyone, and you just never know when those paths might cross in the future.

I'm glad I didn't respond earlier because my advice would have been different, however with the call from the high level director my response has changed.

I would take that phone call has a true indication of your worth and who you really are and exit gracefully without saying anything.

Oh Joanie, I am so sorry you've had to endure a bad environment so long. I recently (within the last week) left a bad environment after only 6 months under a new boss. I know you have a few more weeks to go-- hopefully you are already experiencing the joy of knowing this chapter will soon come to an end.

I am so glad you received a call from the Director. I think his validation of your value serves as excellent closure to your tenure there. I think bbstx has given you great advice.. walk out on the 26th and live your life well.

As for your supervisor? Those who create miserable environments are doomed to live in their own misery.

Best wishes for your future!

Where I work we have many customers. Some are really great, and some are not well run businesses overall, but have some very nice employees.

Recently, we received an email from a very nice employee from a not that well run business saying that Friday was her last day at The XYZ Company. That she had enjoyed working with all of us, and had learned a lot. It showed a lot of class that as she didn't have anything nice to say about her employer, she didn't say anything at all. It was a first rate show of good manners on her part.

She gave her gmail email to anyone who wanted to keep in touch. I emailed her back on that with good wishes.

Fast forward about a month and I get a linked in update on her new position at a great company. Was so happy for her.

I know you are retiring from the workplace, but you will surely see people socially, and maybe at community functions, church, volunteer organizations, etc. I think that it is in your best interest to let what you don't say about the job you are leaving tell how you feel. If you don't outright say anything bad, no one can repeat your negative comments in a way over which you have no control.

"I would take that phone call as a true indication of your worth and who you really are and exit gracefully without saying anything."

Ditto- and thanks for sharing the update. Congrats and enjoy your retirement!!

Wow, retirement. Sigh . . .

Enjoy!