Oh, kitchenwitch, that is disappointing. I hope the fun you had over those months outweighed the weak ending. When the time is right, I hope you keep an open mind and heart and give it another try someday.

You are so wise to know that it is how the baggage is handled that matters. Good luck to you.

I am sorry to hear this , but admire you for coming on here and sharing your news.
Don't give up on meeting someone.
Good luck

Well, his bad! If I were single and male I would date you. You sound fun, full of life and have a good head on your shoulders.......too bad for him.

IRL, he needs to get help dealing with issues in his life. He actually sounds like a pretty nice guy that doesn't know how to deal with family issues.

It sure seemed like a great start, and you definitely have a lot to offer so I see this as a good thing, the fact that it's only been a few months, not years. The first few months are usually more on the "honeymoon" mode, I witnessed one of my best friends get back to dating, she dated a lot at first, and it was usually after a few months that the true nature of the guys would show up, and she had to face the fact that it was over, not a good match.

She did meet her soul mate after a few yearsâ¦. so don't despair, if that's what you desire.

thanks for updating us !!!

I'm sorry this guy wasn't the right guy for you, but glad you found out quickly.

I'm thinking the 3 month thing and meeting his kids....maybe 3 months of dating is too soon to expect to meet family???? I don't know.

My sister-in-law and her husband of over 8 years met on match.com, so don't give up hope!

ML

Kitchenwitch,

I'm sorry you were disappointed. But it sounds like he is a good guy, just not ready/willing/able to be what you want.

I would add, I do not think not meeting his kids within 3 months is a red flag. 3 months is fast. However, I don't see anything wrong with you having introduced him, given that you children are adults. It just makes it a tad embarrassing for you.

Brava for your excellent attitude. And I would not dismiss Match.com at all. I don't know if you saw the post where i complained about going to a second wedding? They met on match.com. And they are young (29/32). I always think young people don't have to go looking but im wrong, i hear about it more and more.

I'm so sorry....in your last conversation did you communicate that you would be there to support him through this crisis? Is it too late to communicate this now?

He may decide to get back in touch with you when his life settles down...or maybe he was having strong feelings just a few months in and was confused and used the crisis as an excuse. You may never know but I wouldn't be saying all this if he were a schmuck. Since he does seem like a great guy, it might be worth contacting him in a month or so via text or email with just a " was thinking of you and hope things are going ok" and see what happens.

If it's really over.....don't give up! So many people have made great matches on dating websites. And it could happen when you least expect it. My divorced coworker then in her mid 50's met her guy standing in line at Borders..they've been together almost 10 years. Hang in there and stay open to anything.

I'm sorry to hear of this . Hang in there. He may come around again, or maybe not.

Thanks, everyone. Of course I offered my support, but he dropped me like a stone in his shoe. I donâÂÂt understand why he would push away someone who cares when heâÂÂs hurting. We were not casually dating -- we had âÂÂthe talkâ about a month ago and he wanted me to be his girlfriend. I know that during the first few months we are all on our best behavior, and the real person comes out after that. So here we are! And IâÂÂm not really hoping that he will suddenly call and ask me to come back -- how could I trust him to not do this again?

IâÂÂm not giving up on love -- I just got burned so IâÂÂm staying out of the traffic for a little while. IâÂÂll jump back in, donâÂÂt worry!

This weekend IâÂÂm going to NYC to watch the Marathon from my daughterâÂÂs First Avenue apartment. Life goes on just fine.

Sorry to hear about your breakup. Attached is a little something to cheer you up as you prepare for your NYC trip. : )

Here is a link that might be useful: Johnny T's New York Tips

Kitchenwitch,

Maybe it was the broom thing and the flying at night?

Tee hee, a Halloween joke for Kitchenwitch.

I'm sorry you were hurt. I'm glad you found out at three months, though, and not after you had been together for even longer. I, too, have friends who have found mates through computer dating, so I know it's possible. Enjoy your time in NYC with your daughter. Thank you for sharing your experiences.

Thanks for the joke, mtnrdredux! And Johnny T's advice is right on, but I'm not a tourist when I go to NYC. People ask me for directions, so this Jersey Girl must blend in pretty well, LOL.

I am glad that it happened sooner rather than later, before my heart got too involved. And I've learned from this too, to not be too trusting.

Dating at any age takes practice!

I'm sorry this didn't work out after it got off to such a great start. I have a friend in her 50's who has been working on the online dating thing for a while. Her experience in some cases has been a lot like yours. Things start out great and then the baggage starts to become apparent. By our age a lot of baggage could have accumulated for some folks.

Like you say, better to find out sooner than later.