He's had his pre-release meeting and we've heard that the parole department is to come inspect our house to make sure there is no contraband (gotta drink up the wine, I guess!) so he can stay here upon release. We're hoping that they're going to let him out soon, but he says they won't. He's served 80% of his time, and now we can petition the judge for early release since he's had absolutely no disciplinary action. Even the guards know DS is a great kid and has no business being in there.

It still makes me so mad to hear about people like Lindsay Lohan who did some pretty crappy stuff and she basically walks. Or worse, the jerk who burglarized our house is still out walking the streets...and he had prior convictions! Our son, being an honest and naive person gets prosecuted to the fullest by putting up stickers. Sigh. Not gonna go on that soapbox!

So, we're down to about 100 days if he has to serve his full sentence. DH went and saw him again yesterday (I go a minimum of once a week) and it just doesn't get any easier for me. But DS assures me he's doing ok and is being treated well (all things considered). It just kills me to think of my boy in the same place as some of the most heinous people in society. Such a gentle, kind, compassionate soul, and he's so genuine, he's managed to not lose those qualities despite being caged up. I have to say I AM proud of my boy...he is my hero, and I've no shame in him. He made a stupid, childish mistake, took responsibility for his actions and has bravely been paying the price. No shame there.

I have tears in my eyes. You are a wonderful mom and he sounds like a chip off the old block. Bless you ;o)

(((Nora)))

good luck and keep us posted !

Hugs to you all. Thank you for the update.

I don't know any details about your son's situation, but I wanted to give you some encouragement.

When I was 12, my brother and his friends did some stupid stuff and got arrested. My brother was in jail for a year. I remember how devastating it was for my parents, especially because we live in a small town where everyone knows your business, if you know what I mean. It was hard for me as a pre-teen to watch my parents be in such agony. They were always there for my brother, and he is forever grateful!

Now, 32 years later, he is happy, functional, normal, 50-year-old man with a good job and wonderful family. You think you'll never get past it, but you do. We almost never talk about it, not because we are trying for forget, but because so many other life experiences have overshadowed that event. At the same time, he freely tells people about it, if he feels it will help someone else.

I hope it doesn't sound like it took 32 years to get past this, LOL! It was only a matter of a year or two and him growing up that started the healing process.

HTH

We are finally letting ourselves talk about what he'll do when he's out, his first wish is to go to IHOP. Whatever, we'll do it! He will probably want a private homecoming, get used to being home and free and able to use a bathroom with a door. Then we plan a party for friends & family. If it's after the holidays that he's home, we're having Christmas in February, where the house will be decorated with every holiday theme, and we'll serve a traditional Thanksgiving dinner and open presents.

Jon is planning to go back to school...he's talked about going to tattoo school, but also getting a degree in business...he thought tattoos will provide him back up income. For the short term he would like to travel the US, but has to wait till he's allowed to leave the state. We think he's going to go live with his sister in a small town where no one knows him and he can attend the college there. I think it's a great idea, and it suits his personality.

All I know is that I'm so happy my son has retained his sense of humor and is probably even more compaasionate now than before. Especially because he's run into many people who don't have any sort of support system,education or hope for the future. And he's run into the worst attitudes of homophobia, racism and hatred, and it's more firmly entrenched his ideals of fairness.

We are planning to petition the court to expunge his record once he's completed all post-prison supervision. We'll also petition for a pardon, but that's not as likely to happen. We're confident we can get his name cleared, but it's not going to happen fast enough.

Another truism: it's not what happens to you in life that determines who you are, it's how you react to it. I'm deeply inspired by Jon's reaction to seeing the worst. He's had to look it in the face and has come out with stronger compassion than ever. You've raised a good man, mom : )

I have a sense that he is meant to make a Difference somewhere. Hope his last days fly by without incident and you have him back in your arms, and he can start college, a bit older, but infinitely wiser.