Yup. Fire ants.

I am not sure, but I am so glad your post was just about this!
I had no idea what I was going to read.

Not with spiders, but life altering event? Yeah, the time we went sliding sideways down the Major Deegan, but that's another story for another time....

I just read about a family in a MULTI million dollar home who fled due to poisonous spider infestation. They sued the previous owners..I want to say FUMIGATE!! I am a little SHOCKED that a person who is deathly afraid of bugs/spiders would be a gardener. They sort of come with the territory. This has been an especially abundant spider year. To answer your question yes, the incidents usually surround people who wear me out to the point I just walk away. The part I am SHOCKED over is their surprise to discover I have a tipping point of no return.

Some days I feel that way about work.

But my financial guy tells me I have 16 years left to go!

Honestly, I feel that way at times about my 22 year old son, who lives at home, is unemployed, doesn't participate as a member of the family, oh, I could go on. But he has challenges that require a special degree of patience and support, so we continue...but sometimes I really and truly want to throw my hands in the air and walk away.

I hate spiders, too!

The phrase 'the straw that broke the came's back' implies a whole load of other straws already there?
If this incident made you feel like gardening is no longer a joy for you, do other things that make you happy. After your spider bite I can certainly understand how you feel.
Perhaps some day, your perspective may change again.

Peegee, I am so sorry. I understand your phobia, being a lifelong arachniphobe myself. It might interest you to know that I learned to overcome my unreasonable fear of spiders some years ago. I had to....I am a professional horticulturist who spent many years 'in the trenches ' and remain an avid gardener today. I have been bitten by a brown recluse, by the way.

I started learning everything I could about spiders, their behaviors, and habitats.....I carried field guides with me to every job, every hike and camping trip. Before I knew it, I had stopped screeching and running from spiders and was leaning in to get a closer look.

Living and working in the South, I've had LOTS of spider experiences! What I'm saying is that it would be such a shame for you to be forced to leave gardening behind you because of your fears. Experts say that phobias are the easiest of all mental issues to overcome. Speaking as someone who left behind her crippling fears of spiders, snakes, and heights (had to have professional help with that one), I very much hope that you'll change your mind and overcome the fear.

Fire ants are the easy ones. Snakes took the same kind of self education that spiders did. The more I learned, the less I screamed and ran from every rustle in the weeds.

Let me know if I can help.

Luckily I don't have very many spiders - or at least they're not the scary kind. But I am very cautious when gardening at our vacation home. DH was using a pitchfork to spread mulch and uncovered baby rattlesnakes who were all curled up and enjoying the warmth. So I've learned to be very careful when flipping over stones.

People who have been very active in a dog rescue I work with leave over seemingly minor disagreements. I have long thought that the desire to quit has built over time with these people.

My marriage ended that way - over a seemingly minor issue which was really the culmination of much more.

It could have been a wolf spider, we have them here in Tx too. They used to scare the b'jesus out if me, but now I'll step on them, but they can run pretty fast in spite of their size. Several times when I've stepped on one, a hundred babies came running since they carry them on their back. That's the scary part for me cause then I have to make sure I get them all!

yes..it is how I left the career I loved more than anything. I arrived back in the office 10 yrs ago this month. It had been a long day but a good one. I had mentored a student all day and was behind in my work but that wasn't unusual. I walked in and no one seemed to be around. I walked about a bit in the office and found everyone attending a party...one I hadn't known about and obviously wasn't invited to. I stood in the door and looked at all of them...it was an enlightening moment. I realized I just didn't belong there . I walked back to my desk. I unloaded my car of all the equipment that wasn't mine. I placed all on my desk and wrote a note saying I wouldn't be back.

The next day mid-morning I received a call from my boss and she asked where I was . I said I had left a note and that I was done. She said ,"you can't do that!!!!". I said I had done it and that I wouldn't be back and that it didn't matter if I didn't get another job in that field. I was finished. It was all over.

Graywings is correct..there is always more to it but as peegee noted there is often that one moment that is the defining point in a decision. c

Peegee it's been a few days, how are you feeling now?

I didn't eat corn on the cob for two years after shucking corn only to find a rather large corn snake inside the cob. Freaked me out so bad. I can't stand snakes.

Yes, Lucille, I guess it was the culmination of a lot of 'scares" over a relatively short time and longer term over my life! Recently I even had a mason replace the ancient basement windows of my new house with good double pane windows and a week later they all looked like a scene from Arachnophobia - that really freaked me out! Anyway, the box is still in the driveway! I intend to empty it into the trash when the barrel is out on the curb. I have rethought my plan for all the many plants I was planning to dig up and have decided to take only a special few. (in the back of a truck; not in my car!) That'll be enough. It's so hard to explain the indifference I feel, but yes, it's a line crossed that feels permanent......Annie - that sounded major, not minor! Trail, that's exactly what I mean, a major shift in one's life trajectory over a seemingly minor event. You had enjoyed and identified yourself with that career and suddenly, done! Mine being much less significant but still I've always felt myself a gardener. I suddenly don't any longer. Patty - I've seen nursery spiders with babies which is fascinating, but horrifying to me. Arcy-I would like to read about that family! and, yeah, gardening has always been a bit of a challenge for me, but I've managed. Until now. Rhizo, right now I feel too old to want to change or maybe it's about not wanting to put myself through the stress. There has always been tension there; I just don't want to inrease the odds that I'll have to deal with it. I'd be better off living in a condo, but I love land and space around me and my privacy. So given that, I'll have to find a way to limit my exposure. Anyway, thank you all!

Kudos to you on your own self-awareness and making a decision on that.

I have not hit that point yet but there have been some close calls over the years. A bunch of little, seemingly innocuous events add up to a lot of stress. When enough is truly enough, I hope that I see it clearly and do not delay the inevitable.