I did it, and a photo to sort of prove it!

10 years ago

I faced my "fear" today and crossed the bridge. I admit that in recent days I was thinking about it and could feel the worry creep inside me. Even though I've been driving the bridge w/o problems for 8 years since that one panic attack, the recent accident had me a little freaked out.

Today I had to bring my boys to camp, which meant I had to cross the bridge to get them there. I drank lots of water, as someone suggested, and though I could feel myself getting a little nervous, it really helped that my daughter was sitting in the front next to me having a detailed conversation. And, a transit police officer happened to be in the lane right next to me, so it prevented anyone from driving recklessly on the way across.

The way back was a different story. The right lane on the span was closed for construction on the bridge so there was heavy traffic in the remaining two lanes. There were two 18-wheelers behind me as I approached the bridge so I switched lanes (car was launched off the bridge after being hit from behind by a truck). Then just as I'm getting on the bridge, my dd says, "Mom, so where was it that the car went off the bridge anyway?" OMG, I was ready to kill her!! The span I was getting on is the one that gives me trouble so I just matter of factly said, "I'm not talking about that now!" And later, after we got across, she apologized and said she'd forgotten about my anxiety. So traffic was very heavy and moving sooooooo slowly over the bridge that it just added to my nerves, but fortunately, I handled it just fine, a few deep breaths and keeping in conversation with my dd helped.

I took this picture of my younger son outside his cabin, which is on a hillside overlooking the bay. In the background, you can see the dreaded bridge. Not the best photo of my son - he was embarrassed I was taking his picture and I couldn't see his face in my viewfinder. I'm so proud of my son though, because he's a total mama's boy but he begged to go to this camp this year My older two were 11 the first time they went and he's only 10. Fortunately, if he gets a little homesick, my 12 y/o son happened to be placed in the cabin right next to his (older son was not pleased - he didn't even want him at camp at the same time!).

A quiet household for me this week...my 14 y/o dd is leaving tonight to go to a water park in VA for three days with her friends. So my 8 y/o has me and dh all to herself for the next few days. The boys aren't back until Sunday.

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Comments (15)

Annie Deighnaugh
10 years ago
Good for you!
allison0704
10 years ago
Congrats!

(Just the picture bothers me!)
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hhireno
10 years ago
That's great. And even better is you calmly handled your fear in front of your dd, demonstrating that fears can be faced and overcome. A good life lesson.

It probably helped to mention your fear here and read how many others share it. It should make you feel better knowing that other people on the bridge are also nervous (based on how many people here dislike bridges) and they are also being cautious and sensible drivers.

One of my sisters just told me her biggest fears are house fires and one of her cats dying. There were 2 arson garage fires in her neighborhood last week and this week a cat unexpectedly died. I tried to put a positive spin on it and point out that she faced her fears and is a stronger person. A temporarily sadder person but stronger.
CaroleOH
10 years ago
That bridge would make me a tad nervous too. I would be tempted to drive across with my seat belt off and the windows down! At least you could escape. Although, maybe better to keep seat belt on!

OK, maybe I didn't make you feel any better, but it was good to tackle this fear head-on because it seems that bridge is a part of your every day life, so it's good you're not letting "it" control your life.
yayagal
10 years ago
That's great, you're going to be fine from now on. I developed the fear the year I turned thirty and actually stopped at the top of the bridge and couldn't budge in fear when my Mom said "let's turn on the radio and that will help" Cripes we turn it on and the news is saying there's a car broken down on the bridge. It was ME and I knew I had to do something so just drove away. That was the Tappan Zee. I was nervous coming back but I did it. Now I'm fine.
blfenton
10 years ago
That is one very long bridge over a whole whack of water. No wonder you get apprehensive about crossing it. Good for you for facing it.
jlj48
10 years ago
I honestly do not think I could drive across that bridge.
pammyfay
10 years ago
You are strong!
You are invincible!
You are WOOO-MANNN!!!!

(I've driven from Virginia to Connecticut -- twice-- and back, and hated to go over the NYC bridges, but I had to do it. Over the years, traveled the Tappan Zee many times. Never really wanted to go vacation at the Bay beaches; now I have another reason!)
terezosa / terriks
10 years ago
Good for you for facing your fear!
I don't know what would be worse, driving across that bridge or being a passenger while my husband is driving. I often think that he is following too closely...
fourkids4us
Original Author
10 years ago
Yaya, that had me LOL!!!! So glad your mom was with you to help you get over the bridge but how funny that her solution only pointed out your dilemma! I know the Tappan Zee very well. I went to college in the Bronx and for a few months after I graduated, living in Hastings on Hudson. Driving back and forth to MD to visit family had me crossing that bridge often when I was trying to avoid the GW Bridge.
nancybee_2010
10 years ago
That is great! I agree with hhireno, you gave your daughter a great example to follow.

That bridge looks really scary!
caminnc
10 years ago
Good for you but I have to say I hate that damn bridge!
neetsiepie
10 years ago
That is one crazy bridge! You did fabulous, particularly on your drive back. Just having semis behind most people is enough to have them get panicky. Add the traffic issues, the recent car issue, and you had a perfect storm-but you got thru it! Congratulations.

PS...your son is adorable!
mitchdesj
10 years ago
Congratulations !! it's a victory. Your son is adorable !

I remember my cousin telling me how terrible he felt driving in the Chesapeake Bay Bridge-Tunnel, it hit him all at once without warning and there's no turning back once you started.
texanjana
10 years ago
Good for you for conquering your fear!