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nancybee_2010

Do you give money to people on the street?

nancybee_2010
12 years ago

I do sometimes. But not always. It's so sad, whenever I go out there are people on the street corners with signs saying "looking for work" or "unemployed, please help". This has been for awhile, but you used to just see this downtown (I live in the suburbs). I'm assuming this is happening in most parts of the country, was wondering what your thoughts are on this.

Comments (34)

  • covingtoncat
    12 years ago

    Nope. Supporting panhandlers encourages panhandling. Which IMO, discourages people who most need help from seeking it. It also is a creates a climate that discourages business and tourism.

    I have in the past but doubt I will again. I remember one particular occasion where a young woman approached me in the parking lot of a Home Depot. She was pregnant (looked that way) and said she needed emergency gas money to get home, was very embarrassed, yada, yada. I have her some money. Two weeks later, I'm in the same HD and you guessed, it was approached by the same woman again, same sob story.

    I would rather donate to a relief agency or one working directly with the poor or homeless.

  • golddust
    12 years ago

    The last time we were approached for money, we got a similar story as Covington. "I live such and such. I'm up here visiting my son. My tire blew and my car is at such and such being repaired. I don't have enough $$ to pay. Can you spare $10.?" DH gave the young man the money and he took off in the direction of the tire place. On our way home, we noticed the young man was with a young woman, heading into a fast food joint.

    If he would have said "I'm hungry and have no $$", we'd have likely given him money but I hated being scammed. Now I just feel like I'm getting scammed so I haven't given money since.

  • User
    12 years ago

    I do but I'm very picky about when I do and it's depends on the situation. One day at the on set of the cold weather, I was walking into a business building and a woman sitting on a parking block asked if I had some extra cash. She said it was to help her get a room for the night and out of the cold. I told her I didn't because all I had was a 20.00 on me, but while in the building I got change and gave her 10.00 on the way out. She was older, close to my age at least and looked like she'd been on the streets for a while. Something about the whole situation made it impossible for me to say no and just walk away. I know there are a lot of people who just make their living that way but I think if you take a minute to look at the person and really see them, you can tell.

  • mitchdesj
    12 years ago

    I live in a downtown area so the panhandlers are everywhere, if I have loose change in my coat pocket ( which is often) I'll give it, or else I just keep walking, I won't open my purse and get my wallet out.

    We give yearly to organizations that organize soup kitchens etc... so I know the homeless have a place to go, specially in the winter.

    I don't like being accosted while I'm eating in a food court, that seems a bit brash to me.

  • ellendi
    12 years ago

    I usually give to musicians. Something about hearing the music makes me feel they are at least trying. I agree with the others that it is hard to tell if you are being scammed, or if the person will just use your money for alcohol.
    I give to specific charities, but also feel it is important to volunteer. I sometimes feel too that not much of my money is actually going to the cause.

  • cyn427 (z. 7, N. VA)
    12 years ago

    I have a similar story to lukki's. I was asked for change by an older woman as I was walking through one of our parks (center of traffic circle actually) in DC near GWU on my way to the metro. I didn't have any, so I said I was sorry, but for some reason, after crossing the street, I went back, sat down next to her and gave her the large bill I had. Just seemed that I needed to do that in that moment and I still think it was the right thing to do. I often think of her and hope her life improved.

    Most of the time, I don't for many of the reasons you have already mentioned.

  • funnygirl
    12 years ago

    One of our local news channels did a story on the panhandlers w/the cardboard signs. I wasn't able to view it but the previews suggested it was a large scamming network.

    My DD used to see the same panhandler every day and would occasionally give him change. That stopped when one day she spotted him getting into and driving off in a car nicer than hers.

  • tinam61
    12 years ago

    It's rare that I will give someone cash. That story above (Convington Cat) has been told over and over again. I do believe there are many who need help. What we do is ask what they need, a meal, etc. We have bought meals, given out restaurant gift cards (in small amounts, enough for a meal), etc. We have also bought groceries or gas for someone. I do feel a responsiblity to help and I try my best to determine if it is a real need, but you can't always tell. I would rather be in error than not help someone who really needs it. I figure it's their responsibility to be telling me the truth . . .

  • jterrilynn
    12 years ago

    I have given food. I'm not comfortable giving money. It's always a worry to give money because I don't want to help support a habit or get scammed. If I lived somewhere cold I would probably make a point of giving them something warm to wear. There used to be a church that took in the homeless about a half an hour south and I would give to that church. The county has since shut it down though on the grounds that it was illegal for the church to temporality house people. That caused a big stir and the county talked of creating another homeless shelter. I'm not sure what happened with that though. Last I looked into it I only saw shelters that had a whole bunch of stipulations attached and I couldn't seem to find a place that those mentally imbalanced homeless drifters could land in in my county.

  • dedtired
    12 years ago

    One time I saw a bag lady picking through a trash can on Walnut St in Philadelphia (upscale). I just tore my heart out so I gave her some money. She didn't ask for it.

    Mostly I don't, for all the reasons above. I do give to the musicians and Philadelphia has some great street musicians. There used to be a group of blind people who sang in harmony in the train concourse. Also music students. Some are just amazing, others are just horrible.

  • neetsiepie
    12 years ago

    This really falls under my pet peeve category. I don't know if it's because the laws here are so lax on panhandling or what, but it's prevalent in my area. So, in that case, my answer is no.

    I've had panhandlers get mad at me when I offer them food when they're holding that sign that says they're hungry. And I've been approached numerous times with the gas sob story. I've actually told a couple of the gas people that I have a gas can and that can get them a few miles, but they've never, ever taken me up on the offer.

    I've seen some with dogs near the stores, and in those cases, I'll pick up a can or two of dog food and give it to them, but I won't give money. Ok, one exception...a guy had a really clever sign, I can't recall what it said, but it made me smile and he seemed happy on that sunny day, so I gave him $5. He was so nice about it.

    There is a large network of panhandlers in my town, they have a spot at a freeway offramp that is heavily traveled and they rotate people in and out of there.

    I learned that there are dozens of options in our town for people who need emergency service (gas, food, shelter)...the churches give out gas vouchers and buy bus tickets, the police station gives out free lunches, and we have more than one shelter, but to stay there they can't bring alcohol or drugs in with them. The food banks don't turn anyone away, and there are places you can get meals free, you don't have to be homeless to get them. So any more, I don't cater to pan handlers. Instead, I give to social service organizations.

  • terezosa / terriks
    12 years ago

    They just passed a law in my area making it illegal for a motorist to give a pedestrian money. I don't think it will apply to people panhandling in parking lots though.

  • maire_cate
    12 years ago

    No - most of the panhandlers are scam artists and if they really are homeless it's not going to help them. But yesterday while I was paying for lunch meat in my local deli a young teen asked me for a quarter. I said no - and then asked if he needed help. He just walked away but it's been bothering me now for 2 days.

  • nancybee_2010
    Original Author
    12 years ago

    This is interesting. Mostly, the people I see are the same ones all the time, and they stand on different corners, sometimes changing places. Now I'm wondering if this is a scam.

  • rilie
    12 years ago

    I live in a small city where panhandling is not very common at all. There is an older man I see sometimes outside a coffee shop I stop at every now and again. I don't know his story, but when I see him I'll give him $2 or $3 or $5, whatever I have handy. I figure 2 or 3 dollars isn't going to make much of a difference in my life, but it might in his.

  • maire_cate
    12 years ago

    We were staying in the Fairmont Olympic Hotel in Seattle a few years ago and decided to take a stroll around the block before dinner. Four panhandlers approached us - one was a woman who said she locked her purse in the car and needed money to call her husband to bring an extra key. Another was a woman with a baby in a stroller who asked for money to buy formula. And the last 2 were young adults who asked for money without any story.

    DH nearly gave money to the first woman but then offered to call the police to come and open her car. Needless to say she declined.

    When we returned to the hotel I mentioned this to the concierge and he said quite a few of these panhandlers are regulars and manage to make a good income from their 'job.' He also explained that there were several hostels in the area and that many of the panhandlers seldom worked but simply moved up and down the coast as the weather allowed.

    In San Francisco last October I was surprised at the number of people sitting on the sidewalks around Union Square with signs asking for money. One young man had a sign that read "Need money to fly home for Mom's funeral".

  • jmc01
    12 years ago

    Nobody appoined me god with the ability to know who and isn't legit.

    That being said, I always give to the Streetwise vendors in my city.

  • work_in_progress_08
    12 years ago

    We don't have any in our area, but when I go into the city, I always give a little $$ if I see someone who is homeless or playing an instrument. I just cannot walk on by without feeling badly - so I give what can.

    I saved a greeting card DH gave me for my birthday back when we first started dating. On the front was an older man pushing a shopping cart that was full of his belongings. The card was sort of a remembrance of all the time we spend in the city and my wanting to help every homeless person I came upon.

    I definitely don't give money if the person seems intoxicated. I am not knowingly supporting that habit. I guess there may be times when I've done so in the past, but my intension was for the person to get something to eat.

  • busybee3
    12 years ago

    the only time i usually give a little money is when someone is entertaining on the street... usually by playing music...i'll usually listen for awhile and then put something in their can---i appreciate that they're working for their money. otherwise, i pass them by. i would happily give food, but don't carry that with me!

  • Oakley
    12 years ago

    Not to panhandlers which is how they make their living. But I would give money to an obvious homeless person downtown.

  • roarah
    12 years ago

    I always give to street entertainers...They usually do not ask (although the open instrument box strongly suggests they would like our donations) and they are providing a service of sorts. I have a disposition that gives to those who do not out and out ask for it. Often in NYC a homeless person will open a door for me without asking for a cent, to these people I am more likely to look in the eyes and give a few dollars to while thanking them for holding the door for me. ...When approached and asked for help I for some reason feel a bit threatened so I rush away saying I am sorry without stopping to reach for my wallet.
    When I was a little girl when I first saw a person sleeping on a bench and asked my mother why and she explained that they were homeless, I remember asking where is his mommy? I still sometimes have that gut feeling of sadness and confussion for such people so yes I do want to help even if they are scammers.

  • User
    12 years ago

    Usually. I figure it's on them if they're being deceitful.

  • dedtired
    12 years ago

    When I was in Paris there was a fellow sitting on the sidewalk with a cute rabbit. Next to the rabbit was a sign that said "J'ai faim (I'm hungry)". If my hands hadn't been full of luggage, I would have given him a few euros for being clever. There was a street person with a dog every morning outside of our apartment building. I gave him some of my leftover euros on the last day and he said something nice to me in french, and it made me feel good all day. He had kind of been part of my Paris experience, so I didn't mind giving him something. However, the city is filled with scam artists especially at tourist attractions, and that got very bothersome -- the gold ring scam, the string bracelet scam, the sign a petition scam.

    In fact my first kiss in Paris was interrupted by a panhandler! The first night we walked down to the Seine and just as we were about to kiss some ragged looking woman asked us to help her buy airfare home to Canada. A bilingual panhandler!

    In a big city it just gets to be too much. For the truly homeless, they also pee in alleyways and leave dirty blankets and garbage in big heaps on the sidewalks. There are shelters for them but they won't go. Actually I'd rather sleep under a bush in a pretty city park than in a shelter. It is a sad situation.

  • gsciencechick
    12 years ago

    maire_cate, I agree Seattle and San Francisco are probably the worst for panhandlers. My major conference was in Seattle a couple of years ago, and San Francisco again this year.

    A few months back I was approached while pumping gas by someone in a car who said she just left her abusive husband. Since I work with the United Way through my job, I know there are community resources for this, so I told her to call the 211 help line and she would be referred.

    We do not give to the guys who hang out near our corner gas station.

  • jab65
    12 years ago

    Lots of Panhandlers in the PNW. The same woman stood w/a sign near the freeway entrance several days a week for months, until our town passed an ordinance against it. I heard that a number of them came together by car from another town and were dropped off various places--sort of like a job. So no, I never give to them but have given to a few people who touched my heart for some reason. One I took to Subway and let her purchase some food, the other young girl I gave cash (She didn't ask.) I did tell her to pass it on when she was able. Who knows? I did what I felt nudged to do.

  • Jane_the_Renovator
    12 years ago

    No. Giving panhandlers money just pays them to stay where they are. When I was pregnant I walked out of a bus station's bathrooms just as a businessman was giving money to a panhandler at the entrance to the bathrooms. I caught up with the businessman and told him, "Thank you for paying a mentally ill man to hang out by the women's bathroom." People need to think about the long-term effects of their actions.

    I give to the Salvation Army, which runs detox/shelter programs for the homeless. If someone wants to get into recovery, I support that.

  • work_in_progress_08
    12 years ago

    jane - Its a big assumption that everyone who is homeless has an addiction or needs detox. There are many people who are living being one pay check away from poverty. JMHO

  • goldgirl
    12 years ago

    No because of the following reasons, as posted by an organization that does community outreach for the homeless in Maryland:

    Q: Should I give to panhandlers?

    A: Our experience at Bethesda Cares is that panhandling is not the answer and here are some reasons why: panhandling doesn't provide benefits like insurance, it is not steady or reliable income, in creates a dependence on others, and is a cycle that is hard to break even if someone doesn't intend to do it very long. Panhandling often feeds an addiction, be it gambling, alcohol, or drugs. Giving change to panhandlers does not solve the problems of the person. If you want to give to the individual consider buying food or coffee. Bethesda Cares has a card that lists our services that can be given out to those on the street instead of change.

  • nancybee_2010
    Original Author
    12 years ago

    Thanks for that, goldgirl. It makes a lot of sense.

  • Olychick
    12 years ago

    I've heard of towns/cities that have created a voucher system where those who want to give to panhandlers can buy the vouchers, which then can be used for food (or other goods) in local businesses. It reduces the reward for those seeking $$ to feed addictions, plus provides the basics for all people in need (addicts need to eat, too). And people can feel good about helping.

    I've been approached in parking lots of malls/shopping centers with sob stories about gas/car repairs. Um...you don't have any $$ but you were here at best buy shopping for ????

  • palimpsest
    12 years ago

    I do on occasion.

    However, lately I have been asked for change by people:

    smoking cigarettes, and holding the pack (@ $6+);

    people holding the key fob for their car keys;

    people with orthodontic braces;

    people holding coffee from Starbucks;

    people carrying shopping bags with new purchases;

    people with cell phones;

    people who are clearly on methamphetamine, and tweaking

    people who are in the neighborhood to get their Methadone

    so, I tend to pretty much not give change anymore. It is also strongly discouraged in our city.

  • anele_gw
    12 years ago

    I have, but not usually because I feel it compromises my safety and that of my kids. I tend not to talk to any stranger while out with them for fear of being distracted.

    I would never assume it's a scam, however.

    I was a street musician for the summer with my small harp. I had to get a license to do it. I could have had another job but this was more fun. I even met my friend from college (another music major) on his corner while there, LOL.

  • palimpsest
    12 years ago

    Street performers are different, though, they are providing a kind of service.

  • nancybee_2010
    Original Author
    12 years ago

    Interesting list pal- you would think people would have a little more self-respect.