My job search history:

1. My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory,

but I got canned. Couldn't concentrate.

2. Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack,

but just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.

3. After that, I tried being a Tailor,

but wasn't suited for it--mainly because it was a sew-sew job.

4. Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory,

but that was too exhausting.

5. Then, tried being a Chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life,

but boss did like how I make use of my thyme.

6. Next, I attempted being a Deli Worker,

but any way I sliced it.... couldn't cut the mustard.

7. My best job was a Musician,

but eventually found I wasn't noteworthy.

8. Working for an elevator company was short lived. I wasn�t brought up with the right background.

9. Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory.

Tried hard but just didn't fit in.

10. I became a Professional Fisherman,
    
    but discovered I couldn't live on my net income.

11. Managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company,
    
    but the work was just too draining.

12. So then I got a job in a Workout Center,
    
    but they said I wasn't fit for the job..

13. After many years of trying to find steady work,
    
    I finally got a job as a Historian - until I realized there was no future in it.

14. I got a great job with a balloon making company.
    
    Unfortunately, it went bankrupt due to inflation.

15. I thought I was lucky working for a vacuum cleaner company,
    
    Let me tell you the job really sucks.

16. My last job was working in Starbucks,
    
    but had to quit because it was the same old grind.

I give up. I am just going to be a happy homeless bum.

dcarch