I think my perspective is a bit different because Jim and I are older, 66 and 65. But Jim intends to keep working because he has no hobbies.

You made absolutely no mention of the quality of life on the job. The job itself. The corporate climate. The people, both above and below you. The commute. The perks, like an office with a view or flexible scheduling, on-site cafeteria, etc.

Money isn't everything, but it's the only factor you mentioned in your hypothetical.

For me there would have to be more reasons to move than money. If an opportunity came up I would have to weigh in all the factors of lifestyle and future. Having said that my hubby has a great job and a pension, money is enough I don't have to work. But we live too far north for our liking but the drop in pay to move closer to family and warmer climates is too much. House prices are higher and wages lower. I don't really want to "HAVE" to work at this stage in life. Our children live in our province but all extended family live more than 12 hours away in another province. So we stay in the cold frozen north for money and kids. We have moved a few times and liked the adventure but at this stage of the game (hubby 51) it is not so easy to pack up and go leaving the pension behind. If you are young enough and like adventure it could work out for you. It takes about 3 years after a long distance move to really feel like you belong if you are not young and have kids in elementary school. Moves are harder as they hit high school. Not sure if this is the info you want but thought I'd share in case.

Sushipup, you're right, I didn't say anything about the conditions of the alternative job itself. That would have to be a factor to consider, for sure.

CLB, my daughter will be a H.S. senior next year, son will be in his last year of middle school. So in 1 year there will be a natural "move point", as far as kids' schools go. I'm not saying they would like moving, though.

To be clear, there is not a specific alternative situation I'm looking at. If I pursued this, I'd try to stay on the West Coast which means we'd be near friends - we've lived in LA and SF Bay Area and have friends in both places, my wife has friends in Seattle too. I'd consider all of those places to be less livable than where I live now, though.

First I should say that money is not one of my high priorities, as I could have made more money by moving to an area with bigger cities.

However, I had a job I loved and was good at, a boss who was a dear friend, a disabled father who depended on me for assistance running the family farm, I was within 3 blocks of my office, my children's school and my church/store/library/etc. I was a single mother who struggled to pay the bills but was loathe to leave my small support group of friends and family or take my children from them.

In addition, I had seniority, benefits like a pension and health insurance. By the time I factored in the higher cost of living closer to a higher paying job, or the cost of commuting plus the couple extra hours per day (which increases your hourly "work time" which in turn decreases your hourly wage), wear and tear on vehicles, etc., the difference in pay was less substantial.

Plus, if I worked 8 or 9 hours per day and commuted a couple more, I would see my children less, which I was not prepared to do, as I only was able to spend about 4 hours with them in the evening before they went to bed. That wasn't enough time, at least not for me, and some of that time had to be used to cook, clean, launder, pay bills, various household drudgeries.

Many individual factors go into this type of decision, each person has to decide what works.

Annie

So here is a question are you satisfied in your job now or does the lower money expectation somehow take from the way you feel appreciated. I know for my hubby feeling appreciated on the job made a huge difference. You don't need to answer that but I have thought something is stiring you to consider this even though it sounds like money could it be something else in your present work place. Sounds like the timing is perfect.

"Let's suppose you are very happy where you live and with your lifestyle there, it is everything you want." That statement alone would keep me from moving.

My family is my priority. Period. I could've moved a long time ago, but I live in middle Tennessee to be near all of my siblings and parents. Even if siblings move, they come back here. What I find ironic is, increasingly, my workmates are moving back home to deal with parents or just to be near family. They could do what they do anywhere in the world and move back to places I'd never even pay money to visit. Home is where the heart is. I can only make more money if i change my entire career. I'm not willing to do that the older I get. I'll just have to win the lottery, oh well. I am very happy where I am and with whom I work.

Would I move for money? My instinct was to say flat-out 'no', but after more thought I suppose I would consider moving for money if it brought me to a place I thought I'd rather be. lol! IOW, money is not at all a driving factor for me.

I'm thinking that either someone is trying to influence you about wanting more money and all that goes with it (status, better house/neighborhood, new cars, boats, etc.), or someone is trying to influence you about making a job change.

I think it's all about being happy in life -- and definitely about being happy in your work. If a person is very happy where they are and with their lifestyle, why would they risk it all for more money? It makes sense if you're unhappy in your current work, but relocating for a job just because it pays more money could also turn out to be a disaster.... higher pay usually equates to higher cost of living and/or a more stressful job. :p I always wanted more free time over money!

Enjoy your work! We have a similar dilemma in our household at the moment. DH had become increasingly unhappy in his work and about a year ago, transferred to a different department into a position that he really enjoyed and was very good at and appreciated by his peers and superiors alike. The change in him was like flicking a switch.

Now, he's been told that due to budget cuts his position has essentially evaporated :-( and he has two months to find another position or they'll find him one. His dilemma is, go for the position in the city 100km away which he would absolutely love and is highly suited for, or find a spot nearer to home that wouldn't be as enjoyable? The city job would necessitate him living in the city during his work week as it would be a nearly two hour commute from here once you factor in rush hour traffic. To complicate issues, I've just started a nearly full-time job in this area, having been unemployed since last October, so moving with him wouldn't really work.

I told him, follow your dream. We'll work it out. If we have to have two households, we'll manage and make the best of what time we get. In theory he could retire next year, though if he's happy in his work he could keep going for another five years or more after that.

I think being happy in your work is the goal. I've worked jobs I loathed for the money and it's not a good way to live.

John, you've had me thinking about this all night. I still don't have an opinion for you. However, you say that having your daughter leave for college is a natural time to move, and I disagree with that. For a lot of kids, going off to school is a huge life change, and it is very reassuring to know that home as they've known is still there and waiting for them. After they've gotten a year or two under their belt their focus is more away from home and that could be a better time to move.

More later -- maybe.

John, I've been thinking also and have a few things to express. But, I made 1-1/2 gallons of chili verde yesterday with 20 lbs. tomatillos and today I'm up to my ears putting up 40 bean/cheese/chili verde burritos in the freezer. I'll write tonight or tomorrow.

/tricia

Here is another wrinkle. Portland is about 1 hour by air from San Francisco and from Seattle, about 2 hours from Los Angeles. There are people who commute that route. Not daily. For example, a friend in Portland is working 3 days a week in San Jose; he flies down, stays in the same (nice) hotel all the time, flies back later in the week, spends 4 days at home with his family. He was dreading it; now he actually likes it, possibly because he swims every morning in the hotel pool and has become quite a physical specimen.

I'm starting to wonder if I could do a similar thing. Work 3 days "there", living in an efficiency apartment (have to be able to cook, and be near a gym); work 2 days telecommuting from home "here". Maybe not permanently, but for a few years until it might be a better time to move. Of course, it'd be the rare company that was open to this.

Well, it's an idea, but what would your family think about this? It would be a non-starter for a lot of families.

Now, let's look at economics, budgets and the like. Let's take simple numbers. Charlie can earn $100,000, live a good life, but still feel under-appreciated monetarily. But his skills in the place he lives don't support a higher salary. That sorta hurts Charlie.

Charlie can get a job in far-away Metropolis for a whopping $125,000. Which he feels he is worth. Only an hour flight? Add in the TSA time, and time to get to and from the airport and park, and get the second clunker (Charlie keeps a second car in Metropolis). OK, now Charlie is spending 4 or 5 hours in real time on each flight. Down and back every week? Times two. Now Charlie is spending money for plane fare, parking (unless Ernestine his wife likes dropping him off/picking him up every week), a second car (or public transit--trading convenience for time) and the parking/gas/insurance costs. Oh, and that studio apartment? Maybe another $1000 a month or more in Metropolis, where higher paying jobs come with higher living costs, no cheap rents there.

Family emergencies? Doctor appointments or dental cleanings? Schedule those for your days working at home, Charlie.

Etc etc.

You get the idea.

Oh, absolutely, I agree.

I wouldn't go looking, or take the risk of changing, or impose the stress on family and self, for an incrementally better job. It would have to be something transformational. In financial, and in other, respects.

Yes, I understand that.

I just like debating the other side!

Hmm. Did the rough sums. A decent studio apartment in S.F., Seattle or L.A., plus utilities, a weekly round trip flight at cheapest rates, getting to/from the airport on both ends, groceries for the time there, will cost from $30K to $40K/year in pretax dollars. Yeah, studio apartments in, say, S.F. cost $1,500/mo and up, assuming you want to live reasonably close to downtown.

Found this. Sorry if it is off topic.

How full is your jar?

dcarch
------------------------------

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him.

When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and fills it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured it into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.

He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous âÂÂYESâÂÂ.

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

âÂÂNow,â said the professor, as the laughter subsided, âÂÂI want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things - God, family,
children, health, friends, and favorite passions. Things, that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the things that matter like your job, house, and car. The sand is everything else -- the small stuff.â he said.

âÂÂIf you put the sand into the jar first,â he continued, âÂÂThere is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are
important to you...â he told them.

âÂÂSo... pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Worship with your family. Play with your children. Take your partner out to dinner. Spend time with good friends. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the dripping tap. Take care of the golf balls first -- the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.âÂÂ

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.

The professor smiled and said, âÂÂI'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.âÂÂ

Good one, Dcarch.

I have decided that there is no answer to this question. It's all a matter of coming to the the fork in the road. No matter which way you choose to go, you always will wonder whether the other way would have been the better choice. Sometimes you just have to choose and try not to look back.

I can look back and see many times when I perhaps should have made a different choice, but I tell myself I made the best choice I could at the time. Nothing beats 20/20 hindsight!