http://members.tripod.com/~charlene_norma/patterns.html

http://h71036.www7.hp.com/hho/html/756_0_0_225_121.html

· Classified antique
· Don't worry about wrinkles they're just antique smiles
· Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional!
· I'm not 40, I'm 18 with 22 years experience.
· I'm not old... I'm chronologically challenged!
· I'm not old... I'm chronologically gifted
· I'm not young enough to know everything. (Sir James M. Barrie)
· In Dog Years, I'm Dead
· It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
· It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.
· It's not how old you are, but how you are old.
· Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.
· Life not only begins at forty, it begins to show.
· Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.
· The trick is to live a long time without growing old.
· Warning: dates in calendar are closer than they appear.
· You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely

http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Farm/9753/poemfiles/aging2.htm

And one of my favorites: "I'm not 50! I'm 49.99!"

I have created transfers using my wordprocessor software and choosing the very large fonts and then when I print it out, I always choose the "transfer" option on the printer setup (sometimes it's listed as "reverse image").

Hope this helps,
jackie (alabama)

Getting Old Survival Kit # 1 —

Alarm Whistle : for when you've fallen and you can't get up

Magnifying Glass: to help you when you read

Starburst Candy: for extra energy

Blue M&Ms or Skittles: Generic Viagra

Baby Food: to help you adjust to softer foods

Instant Hair Grow: to replace the hair you will loose
(I got a small spray bottle and made a label on my computer with 'Instant Hair Grow' Spray once every day)

While you were Napping Note Pad: so you don't miss any messages while you are napping
(I made these on the computer also, and then padded them)

Toothpicks: to help prop your eyes open so you don't fall asleep

Fireball Candy: to put the fire back into your life

Rubberband: to give you your flexibility back

Aspirin: for all the new little aches and pains

Hug and Kiss: because I really do love you