There are plenty of ways to handle this sort of boring and uniform neighborhood generic landscape without destroying the overall caharacter or openness of the landscape. Scaling down the lawn area via adding more planting area can be accomplished sensitively if done with an eye to working with the long predominantly horizontal lines of the house, using plantings in mass and in varied height layers, using plantings as architectural masses with contrasting forms/textures/colors, etc. Unfortunately you'll tend to find that most homeowners in such tracts aren't going to want to spend the kind of money it may take to make an attractive change. Simple things like adding saw cut patterns and concrete stains to break up huge driveways, or removing bands of concrete and replacing with planted turf-block or decorative brick/stone/tile pavers is one way to play down expansive driveways. Front yards can be made more interesting by creating semi-enclosed entry courtyards at the entry with enlarged paving/walkways that provide additional usable space for people and reinforced with some plantings at the perimeter that can provide views of garden plantings from both the street and from inside the house, while leaving the majority of the front lawn intact and visually aligned with the neighbors. I've often used several of these devices to update the standard tract home landscape here in SF Bay Area gardens, in some cases losing the lawns entirely. Another approach might be to eliminate the typical foundation shrub plantings, and instead push the planting areas out to the street, thereby enclosing a large sweep of lawn at the house and putting the garden on view from inside the house, at the same time as giving a bit of privacy or at least visual separation from the street.

In your situation, I like the idea of setting aside a healthy down payment into a special account, now, then adding the price of the monthly payment on a new one, for at least six months, better a year ... (possibly even two?). Then taking the kitty to buy, rather than a new one, a quality vehicle that's a year or two (possibly three?) old. Do you folks know some mechanics? Talk to them, to find out some things that you can check for, to weed out some prospects. Also get an idea of who might be willing to check out some candidates for you, then take some to them to check. If one listens to the motor,and takes one quick look, then tells you to get that piece of crap out of there - give him/her 10 bucks. If s/he checks another out a bit, then turns it down - give him/her 20 bucks. If the mechanic checks one out quite carefully and you give that person $40.00 ... ... and you get a really good vehicle after having paid less than $200.00 ... ... and you save one trip to the garage - you're money ahead! For me? I haven't bought a new vehicle for over 35 years. Figure to buy one 5 - 10 years old for under $5,000. (haven't paid close to that, for several years). Recent Mazda was almost 20 years old, $2,500.00 before tax, licence transfer, drove it 5 years. Current '05 Chev. was bought last summer, $3,800.00 or so, including taxes, licence, paid in cash ... as I'm 84, it may well be my last vehicle. You have some funding set aside for emergency/ies, kids' education, your retirement, etc., do I assume? If you don't boss your bucks ... there's a good possibility that'll they'll boss you. And often if you don't boss them in the short term ... their bossing will likely hit you, after a while. ole joyful

Hi ML, I think you're getting unfairly beat up. Your guy did the same thing that a lot of people did- they bought at the top of the market, thinking it was a good investment. Right now you have a "paper loss", but there is also the real cost of paying a mortgage for $200k+ vs a mortgage of That said. Truly, this is a "good" problem to have. When you and your DH look back on this years from now, you will think about how you had to deal with a place that is less than perfect and sold some land instead and you'll smile about your youth. You will be thankful that you could afford the mistake and that you weren't bankrupted or foreclosed upon. This is still a problem, but it's a problem that is livable. You aren't facing cancer, injury, etc. In a few years it might make more sense to rent because rents generally are rising now. In fact, this might eventually turn into a cash cow if you ended up renting it. You might end up making much more money on it then you would have if you could short sell it now- plus there will be costs associated with a short sell, even if it were possible (it sounds like it really isn't.) This is just the start of the story for you and your DH. Don't let this come between the two of you. There are all kinds of ways to have fun with it and make it a positive. My FIL is a contractor- when the crash started, he reno'd his kitchen and bathroom and took a lot of before/after pics. He started a website for his business with the pics. His wife was delighted to have a new kitchen and bathroom, and he picked up business. Look for the win-win. You're smart and young, it gets better!

Yes Britbrit, things at BMs house are much worse than we suspected. I suppose that, prior to now, this craziness didnt spring forth since my SD didnt spend enough time here. But now that shes been living with us full time for -- what -- 2 months now, these things are slowly coming to light. Lazygardens, good question! Top 10 Rules at our House: 1) Be nice, be polite. 2) We will all be respectful and supportive of each other. 3) If you use it, put it back. If you dirty it, clean it. 4) Use your brain! Think! Assert your individuality! 5) If you have a problem or a question, speak up. Anything can be openly discussed. If it appears that something is on your mind, you will be asked about it. 6) Everyone has the right to retreat to their private sanctuary (aka bedroom) without being disturbed. 7) Knock before entering. ALWAYS! 8) Everyone has the right to their own opinion or ideas without being criticized (well, if its really funny maybe well all share a hearty laugh over it). 9) Laughter is a good thing. Jokes welcome anytime. Play, have fun! 10) Remember your manners. (Ok, its fine to get gross now and then for a giggle, but always mind your manners when in public). Say please and thank you. Hmmm its hard to squeeze an entire lifestyle and philosophy into 10 simple rules! :-) Oh -- and I almost forgot my favorite .. passed down thru the generations ... and never fails to get a smile from the kids ... 'YOU'RE BIG AND UGLY ENOUGH TO DO IT YOURSELF' ...