LOL,Your post brought a smile to my face!! I hope you have a very merry christmas as well!! Good thing I purchased my seeds early on cause I bet the only thing in my stocking is going to be a huge lump of coal!! LOL That is if I even deserve that, lol.

I second that, and I also wish you the best in this coming year. This place would not be the same without you. May everyone have a great Christmas day. We are golfing so my wish to myself is to have my swing be strong.

"BM probably feels like she got a victory" She did. She 'won' the right to not have to come get her daughter. She can now send her mother so there is probably no reason for DH to have the order that she can't take her out early since she probably won't come get her at all for the rest of the year... unless it's 'an emergency' of course. So, really it IS a victory for her. However, since the court said 'in favor of DH', maybe she is angry now. SD got picked up yesterday at 2:20 (I am assuming by grandma) so she wouldn't be with BM until after 3. By 5, BM was on the phone yelling at DH about everything under the sun. She b*tched him out for talking to SD about the hearing, she told him to tell me to stop slandering her mom because she says I told SD that grandma was old and frail, she said that I told SD that SD will NEVER live with her (BM), and then chewed him out because SD told her that she has to do her own laundry at our house and BM yelled, "she's a CHILD!" and there was probably more but at that point, I told DH to stop telling me about it. He was pissed and I guess he called her on her lie in court, where she told the Judge that DH made up the story about her mom collapsing. He told her he is sick of her lies. He told her she needs to start acting like a mom and help SD with her project this weekend. She told him SD's teacher won't let her bring it home on Friday's so she can't help. He called her a liar and finally hung up on her. Then, a few minutes later, her mom called DH and he let it go to voice mail. She left an equally nasty message telling him she had filed a court case in her county and he was about to be served but since BM won yesterday, she called off the process server. She went on and on but it was mostly directed at me... telling him to control his wife... What irritates me most is that SD was probably right there with them, listening to them say all that stuff. No wonder she comes back angry at me. Then, I wonder what she said to them about me? I never told her she would never live with her mom. Nobody told her grandma is old & frail. DH talked to her about the case when she brought it up to him and I asked her how she felt about the hearing. She told me she wanted everyone to get along and I told her that the court was there for people that can't agree on something.. 'dad want X, mom wants Y.. they don't agree so Judge will listen to them both and decide what happens' and that's all I told her. Well, I did also told her that the hearing has nothing to do with where she will live, he isn't deciding that because nobody has asked him to. But, I did not say she won't ever go live with her mom. BM told DH to file the papers for mediation so they can decide custody and he told her if she wants to change custody, SHE needs to file. He already has the order he wants. If he didn't want SD to live here, he wouldn't need to file custody papers, he would just give SD back to BM. and what we did tell SD is that BM told DH that grandma collapsed... SD told me that grandma didn't collapse. We told her if her mom tells us it happened, we don't know if it's true or not and grandma is 70 years old and we don't know what grandma's health is. DH told her that his only concern is making sure SD is safe and he asked grandma for proof she is okay but she didn't give it to him so he had to ask the Judge to make a decision. We told SD that whatever the Judge decides is fine, we are not going to be angry about his decision, even if he doesn't agree with what dad wants. So the extent of the conversation was trying to calm her down about what was going to happen in court and reassure her that it wasn't 'hostile' and that we would also like for everyone to get along. The laundry issue probably came up because, like I said in my other thread, SD ended up wearing 'our' clothes and not her mom's back because they are still in the dirty clothes. I expected her to bring it up, so I had already planned on taking the clothes back to her on Sunday. It really is sad that this woman gets so little time with her daughter and spends the first evening of their time together, drilling SD for info.. or SD is volunteering slanted info.. or BM is slanting what SD tells her... who knows???? But, their day together starts off with BM and Grandma calling dad and yelling at him and I have no proof but I know in my heart, SD is right there listening to mom and grandma b*tch out dad and all the nasty things they said about me. Either SD must feel terrible for causing all the drama (because kids always think everything is their fault) or she is feeling triumphant because mom is 'fighting' for her and this is how they bond and feel closer. I don't know but it's pretty sad to me, either way. Oh yeah, and it's not hard to figure out where BM learned to lie so well. Grandma had told DH on the voice mail that she had filed court papers against him in her county and he was going to be served that day but she 'called it off' after BM won. Her county has online court case index and there is NOTHING filed in that county against DH.. not by her or anyone else. Lying about everything must be a family value they all share. They must also share the stupidity to lie about things that can be proven to be lies.

Thank you all for the Christmas wishes. Gadgets, you asked for an update on mom. She has dementia, and is in a nursing home for rehab after falling and breaking her hip in 4 places. Rehab has been slow. Some from the dementia, and some from slow healing. She has been making progress, and had only just been cleared for total weight bearing a week and a half ago. On Tuesday last week we were told that insurance would no longer be paying for her to stay there. That she would be discharged on Friday. We had less than 24 hours to appeal. The appeal was denied. She/DB is paying to stay until Jan. 5. (DB had total POA) The therapists were just going to start working with mom on stairs and getting in and out of a car. I don't know yet whether mom will go back to DB's or go to another facility. This one is great, but very expensive. Mom has had great care here. I will be sorry to see her moved. DB is trying to keep her with him and his family for as long as possible, but I don't know how much longer that will be possible. Mom is still in a wheelchair, and does very little for herself. The anesthsia and pain medication made the dementia worse. I went Tuesday to see her, and there was very little conversation, tho I try to tell her what the grands and great grands are up to. I went yesterday, and we had a nice visit. She could hold small conversations, and seemed to be enjoying the day. One of her aids is a wonderful woman, who has been an aid since she was 15, and is just a few years older than I am. I will miss her when mom is discharged. I made sure that I talked to her and told her how greatful I am for the care she has given mom. She had just found out the day before that mom is being discharged. She said she will be sad to see her go. Her own mother now has dementia. I am keeping her in my prayers. Thank you so much for asking. I had forgotten that I had posted about this or I would have given an update sooner. Tami