Mari, Hi! Sounds like I'm in a similar position to your sister. In October I was diagnosed with a rare and aggressive cancer that had spread. At our first meeting with the oncologist i was told that this is not a curable cancer and that with no treatment I would live 6 - 9 months and with treatment 9 - 12. I was not a candidate for surgery or radiation since the cancer had spread so much. The oncologist was proposing an aggressive chemo that had only a 40% response rate. 2 year survival less than 5%. However he added that what I had going for me was that I was young (44) and in great health (other than this little problem) and that someone had to be in the 5%. Hospice was never mentioned. I began chemo on 10/17 and just finished the 6th round (it will go on indefinately). However the size of my tumors have shrunk 60% since diagnosis and no new ones. So far I'm a success story. The doctor is even talking about giving me the "summer off" if I continue to respond in this way. While the chemo is certainly no picnic; it is not as bad as I thought. Nausea/vomiting is 100% controlled by medication; so that is not a problem. Being bald is the least of my problems and hey I don't have to shave my legs. The worst is the fatigue and some bone/muscle pain 9bedrest and Tylenol help but out of every 21 day chemo cycle I feel more or less like myself for about half the days. Anyway... I don't know if my situation is relevant to your sisters but I wanted to give you another perspective. Everything I have heard about hospice has been wonderful and won't hesitate when the time comes. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

Goodness, they ARE being greedy, aren't they?! You said there had been a total of 13 visits and you mentioned a social worker and a nurse. So, if it had been 13 visits by each, that would be 26 visits, into $13,000, for a charge of $500 per visit! Did you just see a "lump sum" bill, or is there an itemization? If just a lump sum, I'd firmly request that they provide an itemized billing, to see exactly what they feel adds up to that amount of money. They very well could have errors on the bill, and you are totally within your rights to dispute any item. Too often people get outraged at the amount, but then figure, "oh, well, the insurance will pay for it" which is part of the reason why insurance costs have skyrocketed. Kudos to you for questioning the amount.

I know my posting doesn't matter to anyone, and that's ok. Just wanted to send you a hug and let you know, along with a lot of others, how sorry I am. I could have almost written your posting several years ago. Everything you wrote pretty much fit my DH. He was only 57 when we lost him. He was a workaholic and always put off going to the Dr., etc. When he was finally forced to go, it was too late. He did go through the Radiation, meds, etc., for almost 2 years before he left us. Please, everyone....please....get your DH, brothers, sons, male friends, etc., to have this Medical checkup. It is not just an old man's disease, like some seem to think, either. It is a curable type of cancer if caught early. Saying prayers for Jasdip and family for comfort and coping....and all who have gone through the beating that Cancer does to us. A couple of Widow/Widower sites help me a lot. They are out there, if you need them. They helped me to accept that it doesn't get better...but does get easier with time. Hugs.

fwiw, our vet office said they are busier now with CV and people working from home. I guess they are taking the time to make their pets appointments, and/or around their pets more so they see things that are wrong with them. Sorry you are going through this. It is hard. I started using a mobile vet when we moved two years ago. She was wonderful. As (bad) luck would have it, we lost three pets in a year. She did at home euthanasia and if that can be considered wonderful, it was. Less stress for me and our pets. She has gone to work full time at one of our ERs, but said she would come back for that service when I needed for our remaining three. A local vet office bought her mobile unit, but they do not do at home euthanasia.