checking in!!!!

18 years ago

Hello Dear Friends,

Thought I would check in and say hello and let you know that we are doing just o.k. Time...everyone tells us....and I know that is true....but we so much Mom. My dear Dad had a really bad day Sat....he will have alot of those days. I am trying to stay close and we had been outside alot...even with the heat....now it is rain and more rain for us. Just went down and he is going to work in his greenhouse. My sister is going to the lake house and wanted him to go with them...but...when I talked to him about it he said....he just couldn't leave right now. He did say that when they got back he would go stay with her a few days...I think that he just needs to be here close and with his memories. I am trying to take it one day at a time....so hard to go down to their apt.....I miss her so much. Been busy with thank you notes and I have gotten about 50 cards from friends and family. That means alot....reminds me that it just takes a few min. to get that card and let someone know you are thinking and praying for them. I will most certainly be better about getting those cards...going to go and just buy alot of them to have on hand. Hope all is well with each of you...and your loved ones. God Bless, Nora

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Comments (11)

heydeborah
18 years ago
last modified: 9 years ago
Dear Nora, it is so nice to hear from you even while you are all still grieving, i know that we are all thinking of you and your family. we too have the heat right now as i type this it is 104 degree F! i went out this morning and bopught what they used to call a tent dress just so any breeze would cool me off - lol. i too tended to weeding this morning and just one little flower bed netted me a huge garbage bag of weeds. tell your dad my totmatoe plants are only a foot tall and no flowers on then yet. maybe he has a little trick for me so i will get more than 10 tomates on 4 plants, we will have alot of raspberries if the birds don't get to them first. i do think of you and do wonder how you are, but if you're like me right now you need abit of privacy! my furry baby needs to be cooled off in the tub again, it's so hot for him (shiz tsu, with long hair) and he is my "baby" and i worry about him (he was born with heart problems, so i watch him very carefully). ds is lucky he works in an air conditioned mall, dd finally decided it's not "cool" to sleep in the attic and has moved into her old room. al is coping with this heat better than any of us. i'm glad you posted! deb
DianePA
18 years ago
last modified: 9 years ago
glad you posted Nora!my heart aches for you and your DF!the rest of your family too of course!its good your dad has his garden an greenhouse to help fill up his days!
i would love to send you a card but don't have your address! take care an know your being thought of! (((((Nora))))) DianePA
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nora8
Original Author
18 years ago
last modified: 9 years ago
Hey Deb, Good to see your post. Good Luck with those tomatoe plants...ours are just full of green tomatoes...Dad fertilizes his with miraclo-grow...mix and water once a week and as he will tell you plenty of water. We are looking forward to them turning red and I also like to fry green tomatoes. Bless you for thinking of us. We are just trying to take it one day at a time. Oh how we miss Mom. Take care and enjoy your summer weather...just seems like yesterday that you were still wearing gloves and coats. Think about you and your dear family. Tell Al that I send a hello.
Diane, Bless you for keeping us in your thoughts...it means so much...Dad is my focus each day...try to be with him but also know that he just needs his time alone to grieve...as I do. We know all the blessings...having Mom with us for so long but...we know that we have to go thur the pain of "her not being here"...she was Dad's best friend and love of his life....only time and God's strength will ease his pain. Hope all is well with you and your dear family. How is your DH,daughter and grandaughter doing???? God Bless, Nora
DianePA
18 years ago
last modified: 9 years ago
oh Nora, i feel so bad for you and your dad!and your right, you both need to be together and also your time alone to grieve!!
thanks for asking about us, its been like a zoo around here lately, a lot going on!!!! Dh had to have a bunch of tests done to see where the cancer is, if spreading etc. went to dr on Monday, we knew they found a spot or something on his 11th rib, so had to have MRI done on it on TUes to have a closer look, haven';t heard the results of that yet, but might have to have radiation again on that the dr said, but we'll wait for the results. otherwise we were realy surprised that he doesn't have other spots or hasn't spread other than that rib, if thats what it is! he has a lot more pain in hips and legs, etc, but glad for the results he did get!! God is Good! our SIL Darren, had to have his testicle and cord removed last Friday. he's always had problems, but also had a complicated cyst on it too, dr had to make a cut up where a woman's ovary would be, its about 3 or 4" long, but it was as big as an orange the dr said, an he wanted it to come out whole incase it is cancer.Darren's been having a lot of problems with swelling an infection, was to er on Sunday night they wouldn't call dr, for him to see his dr the next day. the dr wasn't to happy they didn't call him!! changed his antibotic, and increased pain meds, but having more problems this morning, DD called the dr but he was in IN at a conference, said he could go to the ER and have another ultrasound done,but we know how our ER is! so he has to go see the dr tomorrow before noon! the dr usually uts a drain in but he didn't incase its cancer, doesn't want air to get to it, etc. pray its not cancer, bad enough he won't have any paychecks coming in! think he is a nervous wreck that it might be cancer!which is understandable!
DGD K has been sick since Sat,coughs, throwing up, etc DD tok her to the ER last night, of course there everything is a upper respitory infection, her throat is really red, but didn't give her anything to take. i do't think she's thrown up today though, but wonder if some of it might be her nerves too, as they go to court the 2nd of Aug, about Darren adopting K!!
DD is doing pretty good, hands full with her DH and K and the other 2 kids!DD starts LPN courses at Vo-tech the 1st of Aug! have to miss the 2nd day due to the court thing!
I'm having a lot of problems with my neck and hand, been going to chiropractor to see if he can help, but hasn't made much difference. He says i have a double whammy, my neck has a herniated disc,degenerative disc and joint disease,spurring, something else but forget with it is right now, both my sisters have the same thing, only theirs affects their right hand!and I also have carpal tunnel in left hand. from below my elbow and whole hand will jsut start tingling like going to sleep,very annoying!!I would have thought i'd have it in right hand since that is the one i use the most and run mouse with!! so go to a specialst the 1st going to start there seeing about the hand. I also had to have a DnC done again an couple of months ago, but no cancer. go in Sept for another ultrasound on uterus.
so now aren't you sorry you asked!! LOL so say a prayer for all of us too. never a dull moment around here! the other DGKs and our DS are doing ok though, so thats good! thanks for the prayers! take care and God bless! DianePA
sharlee
18 years ago
last modified: 9 years ago
Hello Nora,

Really haven't been on for awhile, hoping this time to see a message from you. Glad you're with us again, altho' you've ALWAYS been in our hearts. I know how you care about everyone & how I've appreciated you!

Thanks for always sharing from your heart. I think my favorite memory of your sweet Mother was when you told us about her enjoying swinging out in the yard/garden area with a smile on her face. I could just visualize her. Wish I could see a picture of her.

My Mom is doing pretty well in a private Adult Foster Home, living with a wonderful caregiver & her family for 2yrs now. She's at 85lbs, frustrated with her dementia & confined to a wheelchair. I get to see a sweet smile from her when I visit.

The difficult thing for me right now is after moving my Dad here this year to an assisted-living of his choice is so many hospital visits. My former DH was in & out for over 11 yrs due to kidney failure as Dad. DH was on diaylsis for that long, but hoping Dad won't have to as he's 90yrs now.

I'm so thankful for such a loving & caring DH now. He also moved his 95yr old Mother from Tennessee to a care ctr in Dec. She's a doll! I know we're so lucky to be able to do this & thank you for being such an inspiration to me.

May you continue to have the peace you've known.

Love, Sharlee
abreeze
18 years ago
last modified: 9 years ago
Hi Nora... Thanks for checking in! I think of you and your precious dad quite often and know these days are difficult ones... The tears will flow... I think that's God's way of letting us release our grief a little at a time. We couldn't bear it if we had to deal with it all at once... Your presence is a comfort for your dad - He doesn't even have to see you. It's enough just knowing you're there for him... I pray God is helping you sleep at night. That was quite an adjustment for me...

My goodness, Debbie! You do have extremes of temps in Canada! 104 degree F! That surprises me. Is the humidity high, also??? Thank God Al can handle the weather... He certainly has enough other "stuff" to deal with. May God strengthen and encourage each of you.

Hi Diane! You do have a lot going on in your family... I pray your DH and Darren get good reports and make wonderful recoveries. ~breezy
katclaws_mo
18 years ago
last modified: 9 years ago
(((Nora & Dad & Family))) (((Diane & Family))
You are all in my very Special Thoughts and Prayers.
May there be peace, comfort, health & healing for all.
Blessings, katclaws
nora8
Original Author
18 years ago
last modified: 9 years ago
Diane, Lady you have so much going on. You are in my thoughts and prayers...keep us posted on SIL,DH and yourself.
Breeze, I haven't been sleeping very well. Have lost 12lbs....think it is just what I have been going thur...I know when Mom was so sick and we couldn't feed her I had a hard time eating. Took Dad today and he bought a cute water fountain and we are going to sit it out on his carport with all of his beautiful plants around it. Mom so loved to be out there in her swing and that is where Dad goes to take his rest each day. I had a really bad day yesterday afternoon....think it was just everything...had my daughters worried...was washing dishes and it just hit me that Mom is gone...started crying and just couldn't stop for awhile...told my girls that there was not just one single thing that was wrong...everything seems like a chore,I am tired and simply miss my Mom....needed to just be by myself. Did sleep better last night...time and more time and I have to go thur this. Bless you all for prayers. Nora
DianePA
18 years ago
last modified: 9 years ago
update on DSIL...he had to go to the dr today still hurting, etc. dr is hoping nature will take its course with the infection, he hates to put a drain tube in, but if not better Monday he is suppose to call the dr, and he might put the tube in. he did take out some of the staples though....and....ITS NOT CANCER!!! praise the Lord! that in itself will probably make DSIL feel better!!!
my DN Brandon was in an accident this morning, he's 18, just got his license a month ago today. he said he fell asleep on the way to work, just missed hitting a huge pine tree.he totalled his car though. he said they are testing him for sleep apnea and some other tests too. good thing the Lord was watching over him. he had his seat belt on and the air bags come out too. glad he didn't hit anyone!
the DGD K is feeling better too!! DianePA
abreeze
18 years ago
last modified: 9 years ago
Nora, you will have more days like yesterday... You were so close to your precious mother and suffered right along with her as you did all within your power to help her. I don't think we will ever stop missing our mothers... Reality eventually sets in. You will unwind slowly. I'm thankful your girls are with you; I hope they understand what you're going through. My siblings didn't seem to understand my grief, but they were kind nonetheless... May God continue to comfort and heal you and help you to sleep better each night. ~breezy
imabest
18 years ago
last modified: 9 years ago
Nora
Im so sorry to hear about your Mother know that you and your family are in my prayers
and may your Mother rest in peace and peace be with you and yours.
love and hugs Kathy

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