>>I'm curious, should I stop watering completely, or should it be misted once every few days? Do what you can to keep the sphagnum moist, but not soaking wet. The idea is to allow the water to continuously evaporate from the sphagnum and provide immediate humidity to the backbulbs. If the sphag feels crispy, then it is too dry. If it gets too wet however, then the backbulb could rot. That is why for the backbulb pots, I use different layers. Bottom layer (3/4th of the total height): either medium orchid bark or perlite. Top layer (1/4) of the total height: sphagnum moss. This way, I can water the backbulb pots with the same watering nozzle as the other plants. The sphag absorbs what it can, and any excess water flows down through the orchid bark and eventually out of the pot. I find that 100% sphag in a pot gets too wet for my preference. Using perlite as your bottom layer, combined with a plastic pot will make the pot top-heavy. So when I use perlite as the bottom layer, I use clay pots to keep the whole thing stable. Another benefit of using orchid bark as the bottom layer: Once the backbulb develops roots, all I need to do is gradually remove the amount of sphagnum moss on the pot as the roots grow directly into the orchid bark mix. One all the sphag has been removed, I top off the pot with more orchid bark. No need to repot the plant once they roots grow. Unless you really prefer to transfer them to another pot or mount them.

Whoa, I think the conversations are going OT here - let's get back to Phoggie's concerns, which in re-reading I note she mentioned wanting to sell her house, but nothing in town is selling. It's pretty clear the current environment is to the buyer's advantage, not the sellers. You can certainly sell your house, but you will have to take much less, in some areas up to 25-30% less, than it was worth two years ago. If you can afford to take the hit and absolutely must sell, then find the very best RE agent you can, and make sure you take their advice about how to best market your property. If you can hold on instead, you will be a much better position in a couple of years. The real fall-out is not banks failing or home prices falling, it's the tightening on mortgage applications. A rather large percentage of folks can no longer qualify, as excerpted below from the WSJournal (a link to the full article is provided as well, but you need to be a subscriber to read it): "...But even borrowers who think they're well positioned to be approved for a mortgage "can't assume anything," said Guy Cecala, of Inside Mortgage Finance. And they'd better be prepared to shop around to get the best rates "Cecala estimates that a third of the people who were able to get a loan in 2005 and 2006 no longer qualify for financing today. That takes into account the disappearance of subprime and Alt-A loans as well as the tightened requirements for getting prime mortgages, he said. "Mortgage credit is as tight as we've seen it in a generation," said Cecala, publisher of the industry newsletter. "When does it get looser? When people feel that the housing market is stabilized, and that's really not going to happen until we start seeing an end to rising defaults and foreclosures, and housing prices have stabilized in markets throughout the country." "If he had to guess, it'll be another year before getting a mortgage becomes any easier. "In some cases, lenders are even looking beyond the numbers for proof not only that an applicant has a job with a steady income stream but is also likely to keep that job, said Bob Moulton, president of Americana Mortgage Group on Long Island, N.Y....." It's a rough time for many. Watch your expenses, take care of your health (maintenance being many times more cheap than procrastination). Talk to your neighbors or friends about ways you can save money together, even in little ways. Look at your town/city with new eyes, there might be free events you passed by before - if you give them a try, it will at least be something different, and you won't be out any big $$. And you might find something new and interesting this way, that you would have missed otherwise. Get together with a friend, take a walk in good weather and just talk. Come back home for coffee and a home-made coffeecake. Someone posted on the Caregivers forum about a friend whose DH was just given 2 months more to live - it reminds you that truly, the best things in life have little to do with money. Here is a link that might be useful: WSJournal article (subscribers only)

Cate - your posting has brought this thread back to the forum where I just found it. The posting before yours was Feb. 06, over 2 years ago. I wonder what has happened since then to the people who posted. Were they able to resolve the problems of how to care for the elderly in their families? Maybe we'll get an update. My own father moved in with us over 3 years ago when my Mom died. He's 88 and luckily still able to handle his own personal care but not well enough to live independently. It has been both a blessing and a burden. Our lives and our schedules revolve around Dad. My brother retired and at least Dad was able to visit him in the South for the winter months which was a much needed break for us. But even though we do a lot for Dad the guilt is still there. Is he happy? Would he be happier in a community where he could make friends with people his own age? There are times when he is alone for a couple of hours at a time and I worry constantly that something's happened to him. You are right to say that there are no perfect answers. We're all muddling through this the best we can. Try not to worry too much about the kitchen. Even if you weren't spending the money to remodel you'd be feeling quilty about something else. I'm afraid it's our nature. There may come a time when your father will need more from you. My son was in college and we were able to give Dad his bedroom and turn it into a bedroom/sitting room with his TV and desk so that he could have some privacy. It's worked so far but I don't know what will happen if he can't take care of himself and needs more assistance. Unfortutnately we can't predict what may come so that we can better prepare ourselves. I'll be thinking of you.

Wow! I'm overwhelmed by so many outstanding suggestions! housekeeping: I'm so thankful for folks like you who have been or are volunteer firefighters or EMTs. I would never have the stamina or guts to do that though. I've thought about Red Cross, but have also heard similar things about political nonsense (and have encountered that within the Master Gardeners too). I've also thought about getting involved with local issues and/or politics, but overall those kinds of things bore me, and I tend to be more of a "can't see it from my house" rather than a "not in my back yard" kind of person. Your experience is so varied! I would have never thought of organizing maps in county archives. Thanks for all your suggestions. wooderlander: I have considered adult literacy, and plan to look into that further. I don't think getting involved with domestic violence or the homeless is for me, though. Hits to close to home, IYKWIM. Reading for the blind may be fun though; never thought of that. Do you read directly to the people or just into a tape recorder? fairegold: Sounds like you are doing a wonderful service for Alliance on Aging. I have the utmost admiration for anyone who is a caregiver of any kind. I'm afraid I just couldn't handle the heartache though. paulines: Great ideas! Thanks! I didn't realize that schools used volunteers, so I'll check that out. (High school kids would be fine, I'm just not the right person to deal with youngsters.) chiefneil: You're so right--one person can definitely make a difference. Thanks for your response and good luck with your new friend. flyleft: Adult literacy is definitely near the top of my list. My main reservation is that I'd really rather not work with ESL learners. I did a stint in college at the Engineering Writing Center as a tutor for engineering students, and most of the students who needed help spoke English as their second language. I found it very frustrating and did it for only one quarter (10 weeks). I would very much like to hear your biased advice about the kinds of programs. Please email me! Your other suggestion about environmental organizations is hitting home as well. I've thought about doing trail maintenance or something similar, but then I think, sheesh, if DH finds out I'm whacking blackberries elsewhere instead of on our property he'll be really PO'd! But now that he's so into bass fishing, perhaps he'd be interested in doing river cleanup with me. What has your experience been regarding the political bent of NGOs and other environmental groups? They seem to be kind of "radical" at times, which I'd like to avoid. annaleef: So many good ideas!! Unfortunately, many of the places you mention are just too far from my home. I live in a rural area almost 8 miles from the nearest grocery store. The zoo is a 40-minute drive in horrible traffic, as are most museums. There is a historical site in Vancouver, and I've thought about volunteering at their gardens through the Master Gardeners. It's funny you mentioned grant writing--one of my Master Gardener friends was trying to get me involved with it a few months ago. I seriously considered it, and I know I'd be good at it (having prepared proposals for 4 years), but it just seemed like a lot of legwork at the library to find funding sources. Now, if the organization would provide all the info I need to write the grant, that would be different. Maybe I should look into that more. I've heard it can be very lucrative! There are many fundraising opportunities with the Master Gardeners, but I've been avoiding them mostly for "political" reasons. You've given me a lot of good ideas for ways I can help by being on the "fringes" rather than dealing with people or issues directly. Thanks so much for your thoughtful response. maggie: Working with animals is high on my list, although, like flyleft said, I am afraid that I'd come home in tears every day if I worked at a shelter (or I'd come home with animals!). That's the reason why I can't work with sick kids, homeless people, battered spouses, or the elderly--I get too emotionally attached. I'll look into your idea of doing volunteer gardening at nursing homes or similar places. After I get my own garden done, of course. ;-) berlin66: You're so right--I do need to decide where my passions lie. I've always been interested in animals and the environment, so I have a feeling I'll end up in one of those areas in some capacity. billV: I agree that catching scumbags is much more important than giving tiling advice! (But I hope we still see you around!) While I'd very much like to help out with such a program, I'm paranoid that one of the scumbags would find out where I live. Thanks again everyone for your responses. I greatly appreciate it! Kathy