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sharburk

Need advice on money gift....

sharburk
17 years ago

Hello, I'm new to posting here. I've been dealing with my Mom's health and living situation for the past two years. She has Alzheimers/dementia. She is 85 years old. I know my limitations and know I cannot have her with me full time and it is a full time job.

I have her in a private home with 4 other residents. They have full time care. It is about 6 miles from me, so I can visit often. I like the workers there, they have been very good to her.

My questions is.... The owner of the home owns 6 of these houses, with multiple residents in each one. My mom moved in last January. While filling out forms, the owner, who does not work at one of them, just runs them, said that if we want to give to the workers, a good time would be at holiday time. As the holidays rolled around, we received a letter from the owner, listing the workers at my Mom's home. About 10 of them. Again saying if we wanted to give them a bonus, Christmas was a good time. The more I thought about it, the more I thought she was actually asking us to give money gifts to all of her workers. Isn't it her job to do that? Shouldn't the employer give a bonus to her employees? I can see giving a couple of them a token gift, chocolates, etc. Am I wrong? That would be 10 people to give to. Who gives to these workers, the resident, the resident's family?

I have four brothers, some cannot afford to give any. I might add that the fee to stay at this home is $5000.00 per month. We have just sold my Mom's house to pull out some money for her care. When it runs out, we'll have to regroup and decide then what to do..

I don't want to be the cheap one, but feel as if we are being taken advantage of.

Any comments here? What would you do? I know the holiday has passed, but I can always do something... I cannot ask my Mom as she has been there a year and cannot remember anyone's name, let alone make a decision like this.

Thanks.

Sharon

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