Someone whose need to quench her creative thirst outweighs what I want, what looks good on my face, what’s appropriate for my hair type, and common sense.

You’re not just someone who does what I ask. No, that’s not for you, you’re not a lemming.

Even when you promise to, and repeat back verbatim my simple instructions before wielding your scissors on me. No, that’s not for you. Satisfying the customer—that’s for professionals. You’re not a professional. You‘re much better than that. You’re an artist.

You’re so full of yourself that you didn’t bother to even apologize for shearing most of my hair off despite a clear instruction not to. Your desires are more important than me, I know.

I’ll be thinking of you fondly every time I try to style this cut that is inappropriate for my hair type and face shape.

I’ll be thinking of you fondly when I go and buy $100 worth of new products and styling implements. You so kindly didn’t bother to instruct me on what to purchase and how to use to handle this monstrosity you created. Thanks.

I’ll be thinking of you fondly every time my neck freezes in the frigid wind.

I’ll be thinking of you fondly every time I walk by a mirror and recoil in horror.

I’ll be thinking of you fondly when I need every bit of self-confidence I have, and find it lacking—especially when I have to give speeches, teach classes, and attend holiday parties looking like a hairless little boy.

And I was thinking of you with the same fondness when I spent two days weeping after our interlude.

I’m so glad you didn’t concern yourself with the petty details of what the customer wanted, and weren’t even the slightest bit apologetic afterwards.

It will only take 8 months to undo what you did, and it’s my head you screwed with.

When I objected to her using a razor to "finish" my hair, she assured me that it would look great. I ended up with BIG CHUNKS of hair hacked out! No matter how I styled it, it looked like an angry 2 year old had cut it.

I spent another $100 with two other stylists over the next month fixing it.

A month later, I went back to The Artist for color. (she can still do that quite well, and is very reasonable.) I stupidly let her trim it just a little. When she was done, and I objected to the way she cut the back, she replied "That's my signature cut!" Ummmm.....but that's not the cut that I WANT!!!!

Back in the 80s, when perms were fashionable, I requested a "body wave," and expressed to the "stylist" that my hair took curl really easily and that I didn't want my hair style to look too much different than it was -- just with body. She paid zero attention to my instructions and I walked out of their looking like a poodle. I was so horrified. It was a very long year of waiting for that monstrosity to grow out.

My hairdresser and I have a different kind of relationship that has worked well for the last 2 years. I have just a few basic ground rules, such as it must be easy and fast to style, the color needs to be in the red family, and I like it somewhat edgy. She has been working within those parameters for the last 2 years, and every time I go in I get something completely different and yet also perfect for me.

For me, I had to stop trying to tell the stylists to do stuff that my hair just won't do. I used to pick out a magazine photo and ask the stylist to do that, and even it she did it perfectly it wouldn't necessarily work for my face or coloring or it would be a total PITA for me to do at home. Since Jessica knows my hair- how it's curly in humidity but flat in dry weather, how thin it is, where the colics are- it's easy for her to make a style that looks good on ME, no matter what the weather or how long I have to style it. Even though it is short, I can wear it so many different ways.

I like changing my hairstyle and color every time I go in, so it's always fun to see what Jessica comes up with. Heck, if I could completely change my hair every day, I would LOL!

Honestly, releasing control to the hairdresser is what makes my hair look so good. Obviously, that takes a GREAT hairdresser and I am very lucky to have found her.