Dealing with a vicious ex-wife w/intent to harm
My fiance and I have been together for more than 2 years. He has 2 young girls-6 & 7 1/2. Finally the divorce got settled, the house was sold, the ex received all proceeds from the house, receives a huge amount of child support each month. The matrimonial agreement explains custody well(enough?) I have it memorized.
A little background: 2 1/2 years ago, she had been cheating on him for about 3 of their 6 year marriage. He stuck around for the kids. She has a borderline personality disorder. She used to abuse him. Finally she beat him pretty good and then had him removed from the house. He filed for divorce. She in retaliation, filed for divorce also and an order of protection against him. But then took it back. Etc. Etc. Etc.
Well, Here it is 2 1/2 years later. The divorce and custody has occurred. Their house has been sold. And she keeps harrassing him and me. I met his children over 1 1/2 years ago. She and I met over a year ago. In the course of the last year and half, we went to bring the children home, she was passed out drunk and we could not leave the children. We caught her drunk driving with the children earlier this year, and we called the police. We spent months in court with temporary orders of protection against her on behalf of the children because she keeps doing drugs and drinking around the children and having different men enter their lives. She also won't feed them breakfast, barely lunch, only relies on school for that and feeds only fast food or canned food for dinner. Won't do homework with the kids and unless the older child is sick, she won't bring them to the doctor when necessary
The youngest child is depressed and stressed out. Mom, pushes her away, doesn't want to interact with her much, neglects the child when she isn't feeling well or has an issue, finds her an interuption and the child is beginning to compensate. Not in a positive manner. The oldest has several emotional and mental disabilities, which mom blames everything only on medicine as reasons for laziness and neglect and lack of desire. The child is treated as the baby that "mommy" loves, as is told to me, and constantly stunted in any advancements that can be made for her. Anytime someone, school, my fiance, family, etc. has tried to assist with the oldest, mom blocks it. The 2 kids keeps looking for love and support from my fiance and I and we give everything we can. We go to all the parent teacher conferences, school meetings, doctor appt's, etc. When we have tried to get the kids involved, mom has blocked them from socially interacting with others. So we have taken up the roles. But it is difficult. They reside with her. The end result of court was that the children still reside with her but the judge placed and order of protection against her, fixed for 1 year.
In June, she threatened to take out an order of protection against me and then again last week because she did not like the fact that she had send her daughter to school sick, refused to pick her up one day when they tried to send her home, and then the next day, she was unavailable via phone and my fiance was an hour away. I was 3rd on the list. She will call my home, my cell phone, screaming at me, demanding my name, my personal information, threating to harm my person, to take out an order against me. My fiance and I reside together. She is angry with him, I understand that. She doesn't like the fact that he is there for his kids. And she doesn't like the fact that I am there for his kids.
What do I do to protect myself though from being harmed? I avoid her at all costs. But it doesn't seem to be solving the problem.