Stepmother to adult children

justthroughwithitallDecember 7, 2011

I raised two children of my husband from the time they were 6 and 8. They are both now adults. My husband and a member of his family had a horrible falling out and are not speaking to one another now. I have been told this person does not consider me a part of the family and had contacted both of my stepchildren.

My stepdaughter and I were very close and have been for 21 years. Her mother abandoned both of my husband's children. I believe that this relative is fanning the flames. She has now said I am a liar and many other horrible things. She has dis-owned her father because he will not ditch me and has told her that if I am not included in any invitations, he will not be attending.

I think this woman is getting ready to have a breakdown. It's very unusual behavior for even her. Are we supposed to just wait until she falls apart. She's recently been married and has kept her husband out of any discussions because I don't think she wants him to see how she has contributed to the dysfunction in the family.

I have just given up. What to do????

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justmetoo

Too many 'she', not sure which 'she' supposedly breaking down and exactly what you're asking 'what to do' about.

Could you clarify a bit and perhaps explain which happened first, the blow-up with a realtive or the estrangement with the daughter...was the blow-up between husband and relative about you to start?

    Bookmark   December 7, 2011 at 3:54PM
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Amber3902

It's hard to give advice when you don't give any specifics.

This relative may be entirely off her rocker but it's hard to say because you don't say what the original argument was about. She might be in the right for all we know.

What was the argument about?

    Bookmark   December 7, 2011 at 8:55PM
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catlettuce

I'm confused about the relative and who is disowning her father? The stepdaughter you are close too? Which relative is it? I'm sorry, but I can't make sense of your post, too vague :0(

Cat

    Bookmark   December 9, 2011 at 12:56AM
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