Parenting Plan--need interpretations

lovehadleyDecember 27, 2010

Okay, so this year, DH gets SS "for a period of seven days at spring break, the exact seven days to be selected and written notice given to the other parent by February 1st."

We go to the Carribbean every spring break and my DD has two weeks off, while SS only has a week.

I usually go for about 10 days. This year DH is going, too, and we would ALL like to go for ten days.

My thought was that we should plan to go on DH's regular weekend and then tack the seven days of BREAK onto that.

So BM could not balk at ten days, right? She WILL but I don't think there is a darn thing she can do.

Here is what I mean, hope this makes sense: DH's regular weekend would be Fri-Mon. So we will LEAVE on Friday (SS will miss one day of school, not a big deal) and then the actual *spring break* will commence on Monday.

So DH will give BM written notice that says "I am taking my spring break time with SS from Monday to Sunday." (seven days)

So Fri, Sat & Sun of our trip will NOT be included because that's DH's regular time, anyway.

BM cannot argue that, right?

Does this make ANY sense?

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mattie_gt

That's really debatable. I see what you are saying and logically it makes sense, but one could also argue that the wording means DH cannot have SS for a period of more than seven consecutive days either.

BM can argue that the sun is purple, you know that. :-)

It would be nice to think that no one would want their child to miss ten days in the Caribbean but sadly I have learned better that that.

    Bookmark   December 27, 2010 at 2:04PM
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parent_of_one

when my ex planned any type of vacations/events that included DD, i would not even dream of objecting! First of all when Dd was younger i could not afford vacations and I was excited dad would take her. He also paid for resort vacations for his mother to go with DD. Second of all, more fun DD has the better. Stupid BM, I think knowing her craziness she will object just to be nasty. Do you need a nanny for your kids, I am more than willing join you on your vacation? I'll work for free LOL

    Bookmark   December 27, 2010 at 5:20PM
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lovehadley

Yeah. I am sure she will moan but there's really nothing she can/will do, short of taking DH to court. Which she cannot afford.

I think the wording is vague enough and since it doesn't SAY that it CANNOT be tacked onto regular custody time, we will go ahead.

She can moan and complain but odds are she will not do anything to contest it.

    Bookmark   December 27, 2010 at 5:23PM
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lovehadley

LOL, parent ;)

Yeah, she'll pitch a fit about it but at the end of the day, she will not do anything.

We cannot afford vacations like this either---my grandparents take us all down there every year, bless their hearts!

    Bookmark   December 27, 2010 at 5:25PM
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justnotmartha

our S.B. verbiage includes the weekends on either side just so this wouldn't become debate. :) That said, I say it's fair. It's a period of 7 days for S.B., just like it says. If there isn't anything else in the agreement that precludes you from having two weekends in a row, go for it.

    Bookmark   December 27, 2010 at 8:51PM
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imamommy

My interpretation for school breaks is based on the school calendar. Does the school calendar list Friday (the last day of school) as the beginning of spring break, or do they list Monday as the first day of spring break? The seven days should fall within the "spring break" which may or may not include the first weekend. If push comes to shove, I'd say fine... fly out to the Caribbean & pick him up on your day! LOL (just kidding, well kinda)

Of course in my son's parenting plan, it specifically stated that the vacation period supercedes any regular visitation and the break begins the minute school is out until school resumes. But, if you offer to let her make up the missed days another time, that is reasonable. She'd have a hard time explaining to a court why she refused to let him go. I doubt a court would make you cut your vacation short but then again, they could also argue that your DH knew how much time he had & shouldn't have scheduled a longer trip.

    Bookmark   December 27, 2010 at 9:00PM
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silversword

Amen. I just cannot imagine depriving my child of an experience.

My dad and SM plan fabulous things for themselves and NEVER ask DD to go, and have never taken me either. Which would be fine, except when they are with us they are nickle and diming me, so that I end up paying for most things. Meanwhile they're going to expensive resort for two weeks in a month (that will require $1000 each + plane tickets as well) But they don't want to pay $30 for snow boots.

PEOPLE!!!!

SD was wondering why I let DD go to her dad's so much, and I said, he can see her as much as he wants, all the vacation times, etc. because I think it's valuable for them to have a relationship. SD does not understand.

I feel like BM/BD's who nickle and dime kid's time off are just shorting the kids. It's a shame.

Your schedule sounds perfectly reasonable to me Love. How lucky he is that his s-grandparents are happy and willing to include him :)

    Bookmark   December 28, 2010 at 1:59PM
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myfampg

Your BM will probably balk.. When BD and SM use to get DD before all the stuff started our orders state that BD could have DD for 30 days in the summer. They could be broken up into 7 consecutive days or taken as 30 full days. They broke it up so that I literally never had DD at all on the weekends during that summer. They would have her for their weekend, I would have her for the week. Then they would get her on my weekend for 7 days, have their weekend. I Would have her for a week they would have her on my weekend for 7 days and so on ... It sucked!!! But there was nothing that said they couldn't...
Our calendar shows Monday as spring break to Friday but it also days spring break visitation in our order as starting on Friday and ending at 6pm the Sunday before school starts ... Which is def more specific. So it looks to me like you can have your weekend an then begin your 7 days on Monday morning ... Don't tell her what your plans are. ...

    Bookmark   December 31, 2010 at 3:37AM
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parent_of_one

I don't think we can LET or NOT LET children spend time with their other parent, children are not out possessions and we don't have excessive rights on our children.

    Bookmark   December 31, 2010 at 7:30AM
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